AN: Ready for a feel trip? I know I'm not. This oneshot is dedicated to Mine and the remaining Night Raiders' reflections on her.
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This was too much. Sayo, Ieyasu, Sheele, Bulat, Chelsea, Susanoo, and Lubbock had all been earth-shattering when he lost them. He looked down at her lifeless face once again, triggering explosive pain that overturned his entire body just from his psyche.
Her death was galaxy-shattering.
"M-Mine… you died… on the winning side. On my side," Tatsumi sobbed out as he trudged back towards HQ. "You didn't just die as an assassin of justice… you died a hero. My hero. What would Esdeath have done to me if you didn't save me…" Tatsumi's speech to himself was interrupted by a furious sob that shook his entire body. Incursio trembled, as if it could feel its user's emotions. "... you were pretty much my savior back there. You always came around to help me out, even when you hated me. Just because we bore the same name as assassin, you helped me out." Tatsumi dropped to his knees, unable to go any further. He laid Mine's body down on the ground gently and collapsed face-first into the dirt. Incursio faded away, and he received a mouthful of dirt in response. He remained there for a long time. Hours passed as he lay there, simply staring at the corpse of the one he loved.
Rain began to fall, and Tatsumi recalled Sheele holding him after he was mourning the deaths of Sayo and Ieyasu. It felt so good to rock back and let someone catch you. Being caught by someone when you're falling emotionally was something Tatsumi needed to do right now. But Bulat was not there to slap him on the back. Chelsea was not there to cheer him up with jabs. Sheele was not there to be a mother to him. Susanoo was not there to tell him to shape up. Lubbock was not there to distract him from his distraught state.
Tatsumi mumbled into the dirt. It was a song; a song he had heard long ago but never paid any attention to the lyrics until recently where his loved ones began to die off. Especially Mine, as they were building a relationship together. Sadly, Tatsumi never got to find out everything about Mine, as he had wanted to.
"I never got time to find out anything… but I loved her just the same. And though I'll ride a different road, and sing a different song, I'll love her till my last breath is gone." Tatsumi stopped to deposit more tears into the dirt. "Like a river… made of silver… our lives were nothing as it seemed. I got shot down, from fierce love, by an angel in my dreams…" The lyric-less melody rang out in Tatsumi's head, complementing his mood. It was constant, but upset and sadly arranged.
"Late that night she slipped away… I chased her into life's gate, and lost her where hope in life never stays… Though I wrote up on the stone, fell into the waters, I'll love her till my judgement day." Recalling how short and sweet it was, Tatsumi cracked a bitter smile. So short of time… so many exuberant and wonderful memories…
"Like a sunrise… made from my cries… of anguish because I cannot see… I was shot down, from fierce love, by an angel in my dreams…"
"Tatsumi."
"..."
"Tatsumi!" the voice cried out again, tears and sadness riddling her usually neutral, red-eyed features. "Tatsumi!"
"I hear voices calling all around, I keep falling down, I think my heart might pound right out of me… I see a million different ways to never leave this place alive…" Tatsumi blacked out. But just before he did, he thought he saw Akame picking him up and Leone gingerly hefting Mine's lifeless body over her shoulder.
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Tatsumi blinked once and struggled to open his eyes. So this wasn't a dream… the pain, the suffering, the loss, the grief. All of it was still prominent as ever, as he had experienced when he lay on the road, mumbling the lyrics of that song to himself. His mind was gravely injured. It hurt to even move a muscle, despite the fact that Tatsumi had not sustained any significant physical injuries.
He felt the comforting touch of smooth arms wrapped around his upper body. He continued the song where he left off. His voice was a little stronger now, but his body still felt depleted; as if he had been forced to fight for his life after twenty rounds of torture from Esdeath. "I woke up in somebody's arms… strange and so familiar, where nothing could go wrong…"
"Thank goodness you're awake, Tatsumi…," Akame muttered thankfully as she bobbed her head in relief. Leone stared into the floor, not saying a word, but simply grieving the loss of Mine. Nobody said a word, except for Tatsumi. He continued muttering the lyrics to the song he was singing.
"Barely alive, or nearly dead, somehow awake in my own bed…" Tatsumi's mind created an illusion to distract itself from the intense discomfort it was experiencing. Mine stood with her back to him in a radiant white light. Pumpkin was slung over her shoulder, and her long, pink pigtails fluttered in the wind behind her as she simply stood there, looking out into the distance.
"... and there you are…"
Leone looked up and acknowledged Tatsumi's words. "I know that song… it's so sad…" she cried as she spoke. "Like a highway… get it my way… life is but a dream…"
"Nee-san," Tatsumi whispered. "Thank you." Tatsumi continued singing after a sob escaped from his throat. "I was shot down… by fierce love… by my angel in my dreams…"
Najenda walked in, face crestfallen. Even she could not hide the intense grief she was obviously feeling. For her to pass Pumpkin onto Mine… a great deal of trust was needed. One as strong as Bulat and Tatsumi shared when he had passed Incursio onto the aspiring assassin.
"Tatsumi… I recovered a part of Pumpkin for you. As a memo, I want you to take the Roman Artillery's scope and treasure it with all you have. Keep it as close to you as Incursio is."
"Boss…" Tatsumi whispered. "... but you knew her longer and you even passed your teigu down to her…"
"Tatsumi, even I don't have the capacity to drag emotional things on!" Najenda said, voice quivering slightly from emotion. "Don't refuse it. Don't question it. Just take it… as a remembrance. Use it to drive you on when all seems lost. Use it to keep you going when you want to die. That's an order." Even Najenda was deeply affected by Mine's death. She turned to walk out. Her steps were heavy and spaced. She slowly closed the door behind her, giving Leone, Akame, and Tatsumi time alone to grieve.
"Mine… Mine… why'd you have to rescue me?! You'd still be alive and well if you hadn't gone after me…! Idiot!" Tatsumi sobbed. He stood up and smashed his head into the wall, leaving a bloodied mark where his head impacted. Tatsumi reared his head back to do it again, but Akame stood up and slapped him across the face before he could do anything.
His eyes opened wide, and the intense pain gave way into recognition. He still had Akame, Leone, and Najenda. They'd pull through for him just as he'd pull through for them. His head drooped back from Akame's slap, leaving his face to stare up at the ceiling. He willed his neck to move, but it did not do as he told it to.
"Tatsumi… we are one as an assassin's unit. That means we live together, die together, grieve together, and assist one another together."
"Then why couldn't I die instead of Mine?!"
Leone spoke in a hushed tone that silenced both Akame and Tatsumi. "Tatsumi, Mine died in your stead because you're stronger than her now." She stopped to wipe her eyes clean of tears. "If you were to die, she'd lose it. But since you lived, you're strong enough to keep on going despite the pain. Akame and I both depend on you, Tatsumi. In a way, you keep us on our feet. You see, even though you haven't been an assassin as long as us, you've quickly became as mentally stable as a seasoned one. While we may need to watch over you on the battlefield from time to time, you're stronger than I am mentally."
"Leone…"
"We need to make a pact that the only time one of us dies is with the other two dying or dead by their side. Akame, Tatsumi. Do you accept it?"
"Yes."
"O-of course."
Even though her eyes felt like exploding, Leone sent a smile to her mouth. "There we go. That's the Tatsumi and Akame I know."
"Nee-san… even though I'm supposed to be strong, can you catch me as I fall mentally? I just need to cry for a bit… then I'll be all right."
Akame sat down, hands clasped between her legs. She wasn't crying anymore. Her eyes were closed, remembering all of the wonderful times her fallen comrades and she had shared. It helped ease the pain for her.
Tatsumi's legs buckled and he fell over into Leone's arms. She held him in a backwards hug as he emptied his tear ducts. "Mine… Mine… I never even got to say I love you before you left me… I'm sorry… I'm sorry…" Tatsumi kept repeating this vocal pattern over and over until he gently pushed himself away from Leone. He wiped his eyes and smiled at Leone.
"Thanks, Nee-san." His voice still held hints that he'd been crying, but his shaky expression held focus.
"I hope you find someone else who can relieve your stresses and pains just by being around them, Tatsumi," Leone whispered. She was on the verge of breaking down again. Tatsumi laid a comforting hand on her shoulder.
"Nee-san… I'm just as down-and-out as you are right now. But I can't show that now, can I?" Tatsumi asked as he lifted his hand from her shoulder. "When the right times comes around, I can let all my pain, suffering, and angst out. But right now, I need to be strong and support the people I have currently."
"You've changed so much, Tatsumi," Akame slowly stated.
"Thanks, but it's really Night Raid that changed me," Tatsumi replied. "You guys shaped me into who I am today. All of you… no matter how long they were around me, they shaped me more than you can imagine. Sheele's caring. Bulat's excellent mentoring. Chelsea's logical thinking. Lubbock's clever strategy. Susanoo's fathering. Najenda's leadership. Akame's skill. Leone's sense of family. And…" Tatsumi's voice quivered, but he quickly righted it. "... Mine's love…"
Akame and Leone simply watched Tatsumi relive his comrades in one or two words.
"... I can't take this tough-guy image anymore. I need to be weak. I need to cry. I need to embrace the feeling of weakness, so I can understand how the strong feel when they're down and out. Like you two. I just can't be strong now." Tatsumi began to cry again.
Akame sat down next to him. "You may not be able to have the strength just yet, but you're still alive. As long as you keep your promise to me, I'll be happy," Akame whispered.
"Keep your promises, Tatsumi. Don't make something that's bound to break."
"I can't let any more people down. I was too weak for Aniki. I was too late for Chelsea. I was also too weak for Lubba. I was also too late for Mine…" Tatsumi paused to suppress his tears long enough to continue speaking. "... but I can't be any of those anymore. I have to be strong and on time. But I just need to let time consume me so I can cry."
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AN: I wanted to write a fic dedicated to Mine after the touching scene of her death in the most recent episode. I figure this is a little how Tatsumi felt, as his mind would be random and jumbled as it tried to process her death in front of him, which is why it was so scattered. Leone and Akame were OOC because the longer someone is with you, the stronger your feelings are when they go. I have experienced this personally, so I know what it feels like. Since Mine was with them for a long time, it's only natural that their reactions are a little more emotional.
By the way, the song I based Tatsumi's off of was "Angel in Blue Jeans" by Train. Some lyrics didn't fit, but the song fit his mood pretty nicely overall.
If you like this kind of thing, leave a review and tell me you like it. I'll do more fics like this in the future, as I'm searching for inspiration for S&I: KoF.
I have a Nisekoi oneshot planned out that's going to be posted either later today or tomorrow, so keep your eyes out for that.
I'm too sad to do my signature.