A/N: Already posted this to AO3, but it's been a while since I posted anything here, so why not?

"So, you're the Ringford royal sorcerer?"

The man who slid into the seat next to him was an ugly old fellow; crooked teeth, yellowed skin, and greying hair that was long and greasy. That wasn't even mentioning that he absolutely reeked with the scent of smoke and rotten meat. Ingway only bothered with a passing glance before looking back at the bartender behind the counter. He was certainly taking his time grabbing the mead that he had requested.

"Gotta be a good paying job being the royal sorcerer," the man said leaning on the wooden counter. "And probably extravagant. I hear the fairies are really party animals." He chuckled as the bartender finally came back with a large bottle.

"As requested: Benvolio's Support , our best from the top shelf."

The man made a very loud squeaky noise as the bartender filled Ingway's stein. The bartender glanced at him and he simply made a gesture to the lower shelf just behind him, his beady eyes still on Ingway's drink. The former prince rolled his eyes as he quickly pressed three Titanian gold coins on the counter, the bartender thanking him and pocketing the money once he was done serving him.

"Gods damn me," the man watched as Ingway took his first sip from the stein. "And to think you're the prince of Valentine. What did you do to gain the Fairy Queen's trust, you despicable little devil?" He playfully punched his arm.

"Kindly piss off," Ingway said flatly. The man let out a laugh as he was given a stein of what was arguably a lower quality drink, evidently unoffended.

"Come on. Everyone knows Valentinians are awful condescending magi. They say that Prince Cornelius fell prey to the Forest Witch's wiles and that's why no one has seen him in long time. She's your sister, right?"

Ingway's face contorted. Gods, all he had wanted to do was find a quiet place to drink after that stressful diplomatic meeting with Edmund and instead this swamp practitioner decided to saunter up and bug him.

The man rested his chin on his boney palm and snickered. "You're obviously a handsome young man with charisma and charm hidden under that angry pretty boy face of yours. What did that little pixie fall for, mm? She had to have become ooze in your damn palm! Oh, and I hear she's of age now and that fairies are rather...active. Do you get to bed her every now and again?"

That did it. Ingway took an incredibly long gulp and slammed the empty stein on the counter, turning to face the man with eyes burning red and magic flaring in his veins.

" Ignis tempestas ."

Mercedes was staring at Ingway with a rather mighty frown on her face.

"You set a man in Titania on fire because he insulted both you, Velvet, and me?"

Ingway rolled over beneath his blankets and buried his face in his pillow. "He suggested that you're dumb, I was deceiving you, and I'm convincing you to do venereal favors for me because fairies are a horny bunch."

He could feel Mercedes's eyes drilling into the back of his skull, although he caught her murmuring " Well, he's not wrong about that last part. " A little evening breeze blew in through his bedroom window and Ingway hid himself deeper beneath his blankets with only the top of his head poking out.

"Just go your majesty. I had a long trip and I'm tired."

The mattress shifted and the blankets were ruffled. Ingway turned his head as Mercedes disappeared beneath his sheets, only for her to pop out right beside him. She didn't look mad now, although she still had an adorable little pout on her face.

"I'm glad you want to protect me, but no more setting people on fire just because they insulted me, okay?"

Ingway's lips curved in a little smile. "Can I turn them into frogs?"

"That's a fairer punishment," she squeezed his hand and kissed his cheek. "I'm still taking away dessert for this week."

"Damn it."