A/N: This is a story where Hiei goes into Blue's Clues Land. I have to say
that Hiei and anyone else that comes later can't use their powers or any
attacks while they're there, also no one can cuss and will be replaced by
other words. Okay, just for the fun of it I decided to make one of the
Blue's Clues characters have a smoking problem. I beg of you, please don't
flame! This is my first fic, please don't flame! Anyway here are some of
the couples you will see:
Kurama and Hiei
Yusuke and Keiko
Kuwabara and Yukina
I'll try to make it as funny as possible, please review! Anyway here's the
story.
Disclaimer: I don't own Yuu Yuu Hakusho or Blue's Clues!
It was finally Saturday and Kurama had the day off from school. He lay in bed tired, they just finished off the tournament and Kurama was exhausted, he had a lot of trouble doing all the homework that he got from missing school and going to the tournament. The pile of homework was as almost as tall as Koenma and only a fourth of it was finished. Kurama hoped to get a few minutes of sleep. He started it the second he got home from school at about 2:30 and kept working on it until 4:55 A.M. of the next day and he decided he should get some rest and went to bed at about 5:00 A.M.
Now he was in bed trying to get some sleep, and it was about an hour and a half later. A few seconds later his alarm clock rang at him, in a way Kurama just wanted to knock it of the end table. But that would wake his mother up, and she needed her rest to get rid of the cold she caught at work. She was a nurse and gave little kids their shots. The alarm clock kept ringing at him, he looked at the clock, which was now basically jumping up and down, now which read 6:21 A.M. he tried to press the snooze button but then remembered that it was broken. He desperately tried to cram his pillow his ear trying to ignore the clock and get some peace and quiet. He couldn't take it anymore and opened the window and threw the clock out, and then dragged himself to his bed. Then he heard a rapping at the window.
"What now?" He muttered in frustration, the rapping grew louder and harder, he knew it was Hiei.
"I'm coming, I'm coming." He muttered heading back to the window and opened it for Hiei, and he climbed in. "Hiei, what do you want?"
Hiei looked at the tired Kurama he had at least 3 bags under his eyes.
"You promised to go with me to get a new sword." Hiei replied and held up the handle of his sword where only about 3 inches of sword was still there. "I don't think I will do well fighting using this tiny thing."
"Can we do it later? I'm SO tired. *Plops on top of his bed* I've been working on all my homework that I got during the tournament. I've been working on all that homework for hours since I got home from school. *Points to giant pile of undone homework* And I barely got started on it."
"That's what you get for letting those humans mess with you." Hiei told him and grabbed a piece of paper from the top of the pile Kurama still needed to finish.
"I'm sure it's for the best." Kurama replied with his eyes closed.
"Kurama, what's this?" Hiei asked him, he pointed to an algebra problem and looked at the problem and wondered why someone would want to use solve this problem, it wasn't like he was going to use it later in life.
Kurama opened one eye, tired and looked at the problem, "That's algebra, it's a form of math." Kurama told him tired. "Look, Hiei can I please get a few more hours of sleep, at least one?"
"And what am I supposed to do in the meantime?" Hiei asked him.
Hiei had a point, he didn't have enough energy to practice his attacks since he hadn't fully recovered from the tournament, and his sword was short and pathetic.
"Go ahead and watch some TV but keep it down." Kurama told him as he pushed him out of the room.
Hiei headed down the stairs and went to the living room and turned on the TV.
"Finally." Kurama said relieved and headed back to bed.
Hiei really didn't know how to work the TV, and grabbed the remote and pressed the power button the news was on. Then he pressed the + volume button which made the TV louder.
"Hiei!!" Kurama shouted from him upstairs.
Hiei quickly pressed the - volume button. He pressed the channel button and it turned it to a golf tournament. Hiei pressed the channel button quickly repeatedly until he saw Blue's Clues and he stopped to see what it was about, he never saw a cartoon. It featured of a blue dog and this crazy man.
"Hi, I'm Joe!" Joe told the audience or kids that repeatedly came to visit because they didn't get how he was crazy. The blue dog barked at him.
'Maybe this will get interesting, maybe it'll even attack him.' Hiei thought and leaned back putting his feet on the coffee table.
"Oh, and this is my puppy Blue." Joe told the kids, as the blue dog ran around in circles excitedly.
"What's that Blue? Oh, I'm excited about the name drawing as well." Joe told Blue.
Hiei believed he was an idiot. Not only crazy but also he was insane, maybe he was a schizophrenic and just hallucinated that he could actually understand the puppy and it was actually talking to him. Instead of putting him in a mental hospital they stuck him on a TV show with a dog.
"Today we're going to draw a name from anybody in the whole world to come and stay with us." Joe told the kids excited and headed over to a giant machine with a crank on the side, the puppy got up a ladder.
"Okay, start cranking Blue." Joe told the puppy and she started turning the crank slowly but had some trouble.
"Here let me help you Blue." Joe said going up a different ladder near Blue's ladder and headed up to the crank. Slowly they turned the crank and a tiny square popped out. Blue and Joe slowly went back down the ladders, Joe picked up the tiny square and unfolded it until it was the size of a regular piece of notebook paper.
"And the person that's going to come stay with us is Hiei!" Joe said excitedly.
"Wha-?" Hiei said in shock and soon was at Blue's Clues Land.
"What am I doing here?" Hiei asked them.
Joe kneeled down to Hiei and said "Well, you won the drawing and you'll be staying with us forever!"
"Forever! Forever! Forever! Forever!" This echoed in Hiei's head, he was going to be in a cartoon land with some crazy schizo......forever??? Joe went to the nearest garbage can and started to put the piece of paper in.
Hiei tried to power up for an attack but failed.
"What the fuck?! Where are my powers?" Hiei asked Joe.
"Well, about that Hiei, we learned about your powers and we decided that you can't use them." Joe told Hiei.
"What the fuck do you mean that I can't use my powers?" Hiei asked frustrated and impatiently
"Hiei, we don't use that kind of language. At least not in: *Spreads hands in a way to look like he's making an invisible rainbow* Blue's Clues Land." Joe told him.
".....................Yeah............" Hiei said believing that he was an idiot, and indeed a schizo. "Look, is there some way to I don't know, say......leave?"
"Don't be silly Hiei, you can never leave *Does rainbow thing again* Blue's Clues Land." Joe told him.
"What a load of crap." Hiei muttered.
Joe gasped like a little girl at Hiei's word.
"Now, Hiei we can't use that kind of language, so every time you say an icky word it'll be replaced with a friendly fun word. Besides we're going to have tons of fun."
"I don't DO fun." Hiei told him through gritted teeth at the fact that he was getting it through his tiny brain that he didn't want to be here.
"Man Hiei, you are such the joker." Joe said giving Hiei a shoulder nudge.
"I don't joke either."
"Anyhoo, Blue was about ready to tell us something before you arrived. *Turns to Blue* So, Blue what did you want to tell us?" Joe asked the dog.
The puppy put on a blue paw print on the screen.
"Great idea! We'll play *Does freaky hand motion* Blue's Clues! Let's wipe of that paw print. *Grabs rag and wipes paw print which makes a big smudge* Whoops. *Tries to wipe it off again and the smudge and it just gets bigger* Sorry, let me get that. *Grabs a cleaning product out nowhere and cleans screen and then heads over to Side table, dragging Hiei along by the arm* Hey, Side table. (A/N: Called ST for short)
"Hey Joe, you playing Blue's Clues again?" ST asked Joe curiously.
"Sure are." Joe said. "Oh, ST did you meet my new friend? His name is Hiei." Joe said hugging Hiei tightly and Hiei desperately trying to escape
"I am NOT your friend." Hiei told Joe still trying to escape from Joe.
"Of course you are." Joe says hugging him tighter.
"Hi Hiei, I'm Side Table but people call me ST for short." ST replied.
'Great, now I'm becoming one of them by thinking they can talk as well.' Hiei thought.
"Here's your notebook Joe." ST says opening her drawer as Joe took out his notebook.
"Now, to play Blue's Clues we need to find a..." Joe asked the kids looking for an answer because he didn't know himself.
"Paw print!" The kids shouted out of nowhere, Hiei looked around the place to find the voice; Hiei came down to think that some little kids were watching them.
"Yeah, a paw print! And that's our first..."
"Clue!"
"A clue?"
"A clue!"
"And we put it in our..." Joe asked the kids again.
"Notebook!" The kids shouted once again.
"Cause they're... *Goes into song and dance, Hiei backed away slowly* Blue's Clues! Blue's Clues! We find another paw print, that's our second clue, we put in our notebook and that's Blue's Clues! Blue's Clues! We gotta find another paw print that's our last clue; we put it in our notebook, because it's whose clues?"
"Blue's Clues!"
"Then we sit down in our Thinking Chair and think, think, thiiiiiiink, cause when we use our minds and take a step at time cause we can do anything, *Pops in front screen* that we wanna do." (A/N: I don't plan to this song in every chapter) Joe finally finished the song and Hiei was on the far right of the screen trying to escape. Blue's head popped out from the left side of the screen. "Have you seen which way Blue went?" Joe asked the kids.
"That way!" The kids shouted.
Joe pointed to the left side of the screen. "That way? Thanks." Joe said thankfully and grabbed Hiei by the arm and started singing again as the background changed. "We are looking for Blue's Clues, we are looking for Blue's Clues, we are looking for Blue's Clues; I wonder where they are."
"A clue! A clue!" The kids shouted at Joe abruptly.
"What's that you see a clue? Where?" Joe asked the kids.
"Right there!"
"Where?" Joe asked still looking for the clue, which was a picture of Mrs. Pepper and right in front of him. Hiei rolled his eyes at Joe's stupidity.
"It's right there you dumb-apple." Hiei told him annoyed and pointed to the clue.
"Oh, there it is, and it's a picture of..." Joe hoping the kids would once again fill in the blank.
"Mrs. Pepper." The kids told him.
"Oh, Mrs. Pepper, well now we need to put this picture in our handy-dandy..."
"Notebook!" The kids shouted once again.
"Yeah, our notebook! *Pulls out notebook and opens it and it draws itself*"
"Hi, I'm Mrs. Pepper. Now, what can Blue want to tell Joe with me? Mrs. Pepper?" The picture told the kids.
"...That's a good idea but we still need two more clues to figure it out." Joe told the kids
"Why does that picture draw itself?" Hiei asked Joe.
"Cause I'm not a very good drawer."
"Figures." Hiei said under his breath.
"Joe! Joe! I need your help!" A voice shouted.
"That sounded like..."
"Mr. Salt." The kids put in for him because he was too stupid to figure it out himself.
"Oh, Mr. Salt. It sounded like it was coming from the kitchen, come on. *Heads into the kitchen to see Mr. Salt on the counter smoking a cigarette* Mr. Salt!" Joe exclaimed.
Hiei was happy to see something that wasn't childish.
"What? What?" Mr. Salt asked taking another puff from the cigarette.
"I thought you were going to give up smoking! Mr. Salt, I think you have a problem." Joe told Mr. Salt.
"Problem? Problem?! I don't have a problem! *Takes big puff of cigarette* I don't have a problem!! How dare you accuse me of having a problem!! I can quit whenever I want to! You hear me?! When I ever I want to!!" Mr. Salt yelled at him taking another puff from the cigarette. Hiei grabbed a cigarette from the counter and put it to his mouth (A/N: I'm not saying Hiei is a smoker and I'm not trying to make him one).
"Hiei, no! Cigarettes are bad for you they make you cough and stuff." Joe told Hiei and took the cigarette away and put it in the garbage. "I thought we agreed that you can only smoke outside."
"But I needed one so badly, I mean Paprika is always asking for me to repair her teddy bear and I told her I would do later, and it took me forever to get Paprika and Cinnamon down for their nap, and I really needed a smoke, I mean really, really needed a smoke really bad." Mr. Salt told them about his busy day.
"Daddy, Daddy!" Paprika shouted as she came up to her dad gripping onto her tiny teddy bear which has stuffing come out of it's arm.
"I thought I put you down for your nap!"
"Yeah, but I can't get to sleep not when Mr. Softy has a boo-boo." Paprika whined as she hugged the small teddy bear.
"*To Joe* See what I have to deal with? *to Paprika* I told you Paprika I'll repair it later, now will you please go and take your nap?" Mr. Salt asked her hopefully.
"But I'm not tired." Paprika told her father.
"Alright, I'll make a deal with you. You can stay up while Joe helps me put up the groceries and then you need to take your nap. Deal?"
"Okay." Paprika said happily.
"Alright, but Mr. Salt you need to put that out." Joe told Mr. Salt pointing to the cigarette.
"Alright, alright." Mr. Salt said and stomped on the cigarette putting it out and put it in the garbage can, then headed to the grocery bag. "First we need to put away this Ice Cream. Where does the Ice Cream go? *Joe, Paprika, Hiei and Mr. Salt head over where there is a cupboard, a fridge and a freezer on top of the fridge* Does it go in the cupboard, the fridge or the freezer?" Mr. Salt asked the kids.
"So, where does the Ice Cream go, in the cupboard? *Points to cupboard* The fridge? *Points to fridge* Or the freezer? *Points to freezer*" Joe asks the kids again.
"The freezer!" The kids shouted.
"Right! The freezer! The Ice Cream has to stay cold so it doesn't melt." Joe told the kids as Mr. Salt handed him the Ice Cream and Joe put it in the freezer. "Okay, what next Mr. Salt?"
"Next this pack of cigarettes, whoops those are mine." Mr. Salt said embarrassed and put in his pocket. "Okay, next we need to find where this carton of milk goes. Does it go in the cupboard, the fridge or the freezer?"
"Does the carton of milk go in the cupboard? Fridge? Or the Freezer?" Joe asked the kids.
"The fridge!" The kids shouted
"Right, the fridge, so the milk can stay nice and cold." Joe told the kids and Mr. Salt hands him the carton of milk and Joe puts it in the fridge.
Joe, Mr. Salt, Paprika and Hiei head over to a spot where the pantry, cupboards, and a breadbox are visible.
"Okay, the next item is bread, where does the bread go? The cupboard? The pantry? Or the bread box?"
"Does the bread go in the cupboard? *Points to cupboard* The pantry? *Points to pantry* Or the breadbox?" Joe asked the kids.
"The breadbox you piece of shoe." Hiei told him still annoyed that he was trapped here and there was no way out.
"Don't be silly Hiei, I'm not a piece of shoe, but you were right it does go in the bread box, because that's where we put the bread." Joe says as Mr. Salt hands him the bread and Joe puts in the breadbox. "I'm so glad you're helping out, see we are having fun, and it's friendly to help someone out like you just did."
Joe gave Hiei a hug and Hiei tried desperately to escape.
"A clue! A clue!" The kids shouted.
Mr. Salt was starting to leave the screen with Paprika to put Paprika to bed for her nap. Joe let go of Hiei and for the first time Hiei was actually happy that the kids found a clue, because Joe let go of him.
"You see a clue? Where?" Joe asked the kids frantically.
"On Mr. Salt!" The kids shouted.
"Mr. Salt wait!" Joe exclaimed and Mr. Salt stopped.
"What is it?" Mr. Salt asked
"There's a clue on you." Joe told Mr. Salt. "Here let me draw you." Joe opens the notebook and a picture of Mr. Salt appears.
"What could Blue want to tell Joe about me, Mr. Salt, and Mrs. Pepper?" The picture of Mr. Salt asked the kids.
Joe closed the notebook. "Hmm...what do you think Blue could want to tell us? Well, we still need to find one last clue." Joe told the kids.
"Mail time! Mail time! Mail time!" A voice sang
"Let's get the mail!" Joe said. "Bye, Mr. Salt, bye Paprika." The dog barked good-bye at them.
Joe, Blue, and Hiei jumped over to where the Thinking Chair was, Hiei backed away slowly because they usually sang songs there.
"Here's the mail it never fails, it makes me wanna wag my tail when it comes I wanna wail *loudly* mail!" Joe sang and grabbed Hiei by the arm and dragged him near the chair and sat down, Blue sat behind the chair, Hiei decided just to stand. "Hey Mailbox, did you meet my new friend Hiei?" Joe asked Mailbox and pointed to Hiei.
"No, hey Hiei, I'm Mailbox. Well, here's your letter." Mailbox said opening to reveal the letter and Joe took it.
Joe opened the letter, to reveal some kids.
"Hey, Joe we know what Blue wants to tell you." The kids in the letter said.
"Really? Tell me, tell me!" Joe said excitedly that he was going to figure it out. Hiei rolled his eyes because he couldn't imagine who would want to mail a letter to him to talk to a crazy person.
"It's...*letter screen gets fuzzy*"
"Bye. Well, we still need to find one last clue." Joe said.
"Joe, Joe! Whoooa!" A voice called out.
"That sounded like Slippery let's go." Joe told the kids, and he Blue, and Hiei who was being dragged by Joe, headed over to the bathroom and see Slippery on the counter near the sink. "Hey, Slippery."
"Hey Joe, hey Blue. Who's that? *Points to Hiei*" Slippery asked.
"Oh, this is our new friend Hiei." Joe told Slippery and gave Hiei another hug and Hiei tried to get out.
"Oh hi Hiei, I'm Slippery." Slippery told Hiei.
"You wanted something Hiei?" Joe asked Slippery.
"Yeah, I have a friend in Chalk World and I need to give him a message." Slippery told them. The Blue dog barked.
"Great idea Blue, Slippery, why don't we deliver the message for you?" Joe told Slippery.
"Okay, I have a friend named Soapy and he's a bubble with a hat, here's the message: "Dear Soapy, I miss you. Your friend Slippery." Slippery told them.
"Dear Soapy, I miss you. Love Slippery." Joe recited to himself. "Don't worry we'll tell Soapy." Joe told Slippery.
Joe, Blue and Hiei walked into another room and Blue skidooed into a Chalk Board.
"What the fudge did that dog do?" Hiei asked Joe.
"She skidooed inside that chalkboard. Come on. *Grabs Hiei by the arm* *singing* Blue's skidoo we can too. *In chalk world* *Blue is standing next to Hiei and Joe* Wow, we're in chalk world! And look *picks up a giant piece of chalk* chalk! I know, I know, let's draw some waves, *Draws waves* Well, we can't get around in this water." Joe told the kids.
"You drew the waves to begin with in the first place." Hiei told him.
"Well, what could we draw to get around in this water?" Joe asked the kids.
"A boat!" The kids told him.
"Yeah a boat!" Joe exclaimed and drew what actually looked like a bowl. Joe and Blue get in the bowl, but Hiei just stands there. "Come on, Hiei!" Joe told him.
"No, I'm perfectly fine right here." Hiei told them and not moving.
Joe yanked on his arm and Hiei fell in the little cup.
"Well, we aren't moving. What could we use to help us move?" Joe asked the kids
"An oar!" The kids shouted.
"Yeah, an oar!" Joe exclaimed and Blue drew an oar, and started to paddle. Soon a big wave started to follow them. "Oh no, it's a wave! What can we do to get rid of that wave?"
"Erase it." Hiei told him.
"Great idea Hiei!!" Joe grabbed an eraser out of nowhere and erased the wave. While Joe wasn't looking Hiei took the piece out chalk and drew a gun evilly and pulled the trigger and flower came out. Hiei rolled his eyes and took the flowers out of the gun and threw the gun in the water. "Flowers for me? You're becoming friendlier than I thought, Hiei."
"Say that again and I'll punch your lights out." Hiei told him.
"Alright you're becoming more friendly Hiei." Joe told him.
Hiei made a fist and tried to punch Joe but ended hugging him.
In the real world, at Keiko's house.
Keiko was babysitting her toddler cousin; Yusuke was there to keep Keiko company. Her cousin just arrived and Keiko turned on the TV so she could watch Blue's Clues, there was Hiei hugging Joe.
"Oh, my god, that's not what I think I saw!" Yusuke said laughing uncontrollably.
"Yusuke, I'm sure there's a perfectly good reason why Hiei is hugging that guy, besides not like you ever do it." Keiko told him.
Back in Blue's Clues Land
'I didn't do what I think I did.' Hiei thought to himself and backed away quickly. (A/N: This does not mean they're going to be in a relationship or anything)
"Hiei, that was so nice."
"Don't read too much into that." Hiei told Joe turning away quickly.
Soon Hiei, Joe and Blue were floating in their boat exhausted. Hiei was banging his head repeatedly on the side of the boat. Soon a bubble with a hat floated by, and Joe remembered what Slippery said his friend looked like.
"Are you Soapy?" Joe asked the bubble.
"That's me." Soapy said.
"I got a message for you from your friend Slippery."
"Let's hear it." Soapy told Joe.
"I can't remember it, can you tell me?" Joe asked the kids
"Dear Soapy, I miss you. Your friend Slippery." The kids told Joe.
"Dear, Soapy, I miss you. Your friend Slippery." Joe repeated
"Wow, he misses me? Thanks." Soapy said and floated off. Blue took the piece of chalk and drew a picture of home and skidooed.
"Come on." Joe told the kids as the music to Blue's Skidoo played and Joe and Hiei skidooed into the house.
"A clue! A clue!" The kids shouted
"A clue? Where?" Joe asked the kids.
"Right there, on the doll." The kids told Joe.
"Oh, there a clue on this baby doll. Well, we need to put it in our handy- dandy..."
"Notebook." The kids told him
"Yeah. *Takes out notebook and a picture of a baby doll appears*"
"What could Blue want to tell Joe with, Mr. Salt, Mrs. Pepper and a baby doll?" The baby doll asked the kids.
Joe closed the notebook.
"Well, that's our last clue...that was our last clue! You know what that
means we get to sit in our..."
"Thinking Chair!" The kids shouted.
"Yeah let's go!" Joe told the kids and ran to the Thinking Chair
dragging Hiei. When they got to the
Thinking Chair, Joe sat down and Hiei stood. "Okay, so what does Blue
want to tell us with Mr. Salt, Mrs.
Pepper, and a baby doll?"
"They're having a baby." The kids told him.
"Is that what you want to tell us Blue? *Blue nods* Mr. Salt and Mrs. Pepper going to have a baby! We just figured out Blue's Clues. *Singing* We sat on down figured it out, what Blue's Clues is all about, wow, you know what? We're really smart." Joe finished singing and Mr. Salt, Mrs. Pepper, Paprika, and Cinnamon were next to chair, Mrs. Pepper had a sort big lump on her stomach about the size of kiwi.
"Wow, Mrs. Pepper you're going to have another baby? *Mrs. Pepper
nods* That means that Paprika and
Cinnamon are going to have a new brother or sister."
"We were just headed to the hospital to have my ultrasound." Mrs. Pepper told Joe, Blue and Hiei.
"Oh, by the way this Hiei, everyone he's our new friend." Joe told the group Hiei growled quietly.
"Oh, hi Hiei, hey, do you guys want to come to my ultrasound?" Mrs. Pepper asked them.
"Sure, but what is an ultrasound?" Joe asked Mrs. Pepper.
"An ultrasound is something were the doctors are able to see my baby on a screen, were they can see if the baby is good shape, if there's anything wrong with the baby, if there's more than one child, and even find out the gender of the baby." Mrs. Pepper told them.
"Wow, an ultrasound must be pretty helpful."
"Yes, they are." Mrs. Pepper says.
"Well, let's go." Joe says and everyone heads over to the hospital, soon Mrs. Pepper is called in, Blue, Joe, Hiei, Mr. Salt, Paprika, and Cinnamon follow.
"Okay, today we're going to check the baby. First, I'm going to put some gel on you *puts gel on Mrs. Pepper* and I'll move this around and there's your baby. *Points to screen where two babies are visible* Mrs. Pepper it looks like you're going to have twins." The doctor told everyone.
"Twins? I need a smoke." Mr. Salt said and left the room to have his smoke.
"Wow, twins, Paprika, Cinnamon, that means you'll have two siblings. Doctor are they healthy?" Joe asked the doctor.
"They sure are." Doctor said.
Joe and Blue left the room and started singing again.
"Now, it's time for so long, but we'll sing just one more song, thanks for doing your part you're sure are smart it's just me and you and we can do anything that wanna do. *stops singing and is waving good-bye* Bye. So long."
A/N: Did you like it well did you? Please review, pleeeease! Don't flame!
Disclaimer: I don't own Yuu Yuu Hakusho or Blue's Clues!
It was finally Saturday and Kurama had the day off from school. He lay in bed tired, they just finished off the tournament and Kurama was exhausted, he had a lot of trouble doing all the homework that he got from missing school and going to the tournament. The pile of homework was as almost as tall as Koenma and only a fourth of it was finished. Kurama hoped to get a few minutes of sleep. He started it the second he got home from school at about 2:30 and kept working on it until 4:55 A.M. of the next day and he decided he should get some rest and went to bed at about 5:00 A.M.
Now he was in bed trying to get some sleep, and it was about an hour and a half later. A few seconds later his alarm clock rang at him, in a way Kurama just wanted to knock it of the end table. But that would wake his mother up, and she needed her rest to get rid of the cold she caught at work. She was a nurse and gave little kids their shots. The alarm clock kept ringing at him, he looked at the clock, which was now basically jumping up and down, now which read 6:21 A.M. he tried to press the snooze button but then remembered that it was broken. He desperately tried to cram his pillow his ear trying to ignore the clock and get some peace and quiet. He couldn't take it anymore and opened the window and threw the clock out, and then dragged himself to his bed. Then he heard a rapping at the window.
"What now?" He muttered in frustration, the rapping grew louder and harder, he knew it was Hiei.
"I'm coming, I'm coming." He muttered heading back to the window and opened it for Hiei, and he climbed in. "Hiei, what do you want?"
Hiei looked at the tired Kurama he had at least 3 bags under his eyes.
"You promised to go with me to get a new sword." Hiei replied and held up the handle of his sword where only about 3 inches of sword was still there. "I don't think I will do well fighting using this tiny thing."
"Can we do it later? I'm SO tired. *Plops on top of his bed* I've been working on all my homework that I got during the tournament. I've been working on all that homework for hours since I got home from school. *Points to giant pile of undone homework* And I barely got started on it."
"That's what you get for letting those humans mess with you." Hiei told him and grabbed a piece of paper from the top of the pile Kurama still needed to finish.
"I'm sure it's for the best." Kurama replied with his eyes closed.
"Kurama, what's this?" Hiei asked him, he pointed to an algebra problem and looked at the problem and wondered why someone would want to use solve this problem, it wasn't like he was going to use it later in life.
Kurama opened one eye, tired and looked at the problem, "That's algebra, it's a form of math." Kurama told him tired. "Look, Hiei can I please get a few more hours of sleep, at least one?"
"And what am I supposed to do in the meantime?" Hiei asked him.
Hiei had a point, he didn't have enough energy to practice his attacks since he hadn't fully recovered from the tournament, and his sword was short and pathetic.
"Go ahead and watch some TV but keep it down." Kurama told him as he pushed him out of the room.
Hiei headed down the stairs and went to the living room and turned on the TV.
"Finally." Kurama said relieved and headed back to bed.
Hiei really didn't know how to work the TV, and grabbed the remote and pressed the power button the news was on. Then he pressed the + volume button which made the TV louder.
"Hiei!!" Kurama shouted from him upstairs.
Hiei quickly pressed the - volume button. He pressed the channel button and it turned it to a golf tournament. Hiei pressed the channel button quickly repeatedly until he saw Blue's Clues and he stopped to see what it was about, he never saw a cartoon. It featured of a blue dog and this crazy man.
"Hi, I'm Joe!" Joe told the audience or kids that repeatedly came to visit because they didn't get how he was crazy. The blue dog barked at him.
'Maybe this will get interesting, maybe it'll even attack him.' Hiei thought and leaned back putting his feet on the coffee table.
"Oh, and this is my puppy Blue." Joe told the kids, as the blue dog ran around in circles excitedly.
"What's that Blue? Oh, I'm excited about the name drawing as well." Joe told Blue.
Hiei believed he was an idiot. Not only crazy but also he was insane, maybe he was a schizophrenic and just hallucinated that he could actually understand the puppy and it was actually talking to him. Instead of putting him in a mental hospital they stuck him on a TV show with a dog.
"Today we're going to draw a name from anybody in the whole world to come and stay with us." Joe told the kids excited and headed over to a giant machine with a crank on the side, the puppy got up a ladder.
"Okay, start cranking Blue." Joe told the puppy and she started turning the crank slowly but had some trouble.
"Here let me help you Blue." Joe said going up a different ladder near Blue's ladder and headed up to the crank. Slowly they turned the crank and a tiny square popped out. Blue and Joe slowly went back down the ladders, Joe picked up the tiny square and unfolded it until it was the size of a regular piece of notebook paper.
"And the person that's going to come stay with us is Hiei!" Joe said excitedly.
"Wha-?" Hiei said in shock and soon was at Blue's Clues Land.
"What am I doing here?" Hiei asked them.
Joe kneeled down to Hiei and said "Well, you won the drawing and you'll be staying with us forever!"
"Forever! Forever! Forever! Forever!" This echoed in Hiei's head, he was going to be in a cartoon land with some crazy schizo......forever??? Joe went to the nearest garbage can and started to put the piece of paper in.
Hiei tried to power up for an attack but failed.
"What the fuck?! Where are my powers?" Hiei asked Joe.
"Well, about that Hiei, we learned about your powers and we decided that you can't use them." Joe told Hiei.
"What the fuck do you mean that I can't use my powers?" Hiei asked frustrated and impatiently
"Hiei, we don't use that kind of language. At least not in: *Spreads hands in a way to look like he's making an invisible rainbow* Blue's Clues Land." Joe told him.
".....................Yeah............" Hiei said believing that he was an idiot, and indeed a schizo. "Look, is there some way to I don't know, say......leave?"
"Don't be silly Hiei, you can never leave *Does rainbow thing again* Blue's Clues Land." Joe told him.
"What a load of crap." Hiei muttered.
Joe gasped like a little girl at Hiei's word.
"Now, Hiei we can't use that kind of language, so every time you say an icky word it'll be replaced with a friendly fun word. Besides we're going to have tons of fun."
"I don't DO fun." Hiei told him through gritted teeth at the fact that he was getting it through his tiny brain that he didn't want to be here.
"Man Hiei, you are such the joker." Joe said giving Hiei a shoulder nudge.
"I don't joke either."
"Anyhoo, Blue was about ready to tell us something before you arrived. *Turns to Blue* So, Blue what did you want to tell us?" Joe asked the dog.
The puppy put on a blue paw print on the screen.
"Great idea! We'll play *Does freaky hand motion* Blue's Clues! Let's wipe of that paw print. *Grabs rag and wipes paw print which makes a big smudge* Whoops. *Tries to wipe it off again and the smudge and it just gets bigger* Sorry, let me get that. *Grabs a cleaning product out nowhere and cleans screen and then heads over to Side table, dragging Hiei along by the arm* Hey, Side table. (A/N: Called ST for short)
"Hey Joe, you playing Blue's Clues again?" ST asked Joe curiously.
"Sure are." Joe said. "Oh, ST did you meet my new friend? His name is Hiei." Joe said hugging Hiei tightly and Hiei desperately trying to escape
"I am NOT your friend." Hiei told Joe still trying to escape from Joe.
"Of course you are." Joe says hugging him tighter.
"Hi Hiei, I'm Side Table but people call me ST for short." ST replied.
'Great, now I'm becoming one of them by thinking they can talk as well.' Hiei thought.
"Here's your notebook Joe." ST says opening her drawer as Joe took out his notebook.
"Now, to play Blue's Clues we need to find a..." Joe asked the kids looking for an answer because he didn't know himself.
"Paw print!" The kids shouted out of nowhere, Hiei looked around the place to find the voice; Hiei came down to think that some little kids were watching them.
"Yeah, a paw print! And that's our first..."
"Clue!"
"A clue?"
"A clue!"
"And we put it in our..." Joe asked the kids again.
"Notebook!" The kids shouted once again.
"Cause they're... *Goes into song and dance, Hiei backed away slowly* Blue's Clues! Blue's Clues! We find another paw print, that's our second clue, we put in our notebook and that's Blue's Clues! Blue's Clues! We gotta find another paw print that's our last clue; we put it in our notebook, because it's whose clues?"
"Blue's Clues!"
"Then we sit down in our Thinking Chair and think, think, thiiiiiiink, cause when we use our minds and take a step at time cause we can do anything, *Pops in front screen* that we wanna do." (A/N: I don't plan to this song in every chapter) Joe finally finished the song and Hiei was on the far right of the screen trying to escape. Blue's head popped out from the left side of the screen. "Have you seen which way Blue went?" Joe asked the kids.
"That way!" The kids shouted.
Joe pointed to the left side of the screen. "That way? Thanks." Joe said thankfully and grabbed Hiei by the arm and started singing again as the background changed. "We are looking for Blue's Clues, we are looking for Blue's Clues, we are looking for Blue's Clues; I wonder where they are."
"A clue! A clue!" The kids shouted at Joe abruptly.
"What's that you see a clue? Where?" Joe asked the kids.
"Right there!"
"Where?" Joe asked still looking for the clue, which was a picture of Mrs. Pepper and right in front of him. Hiei rolled his eyes at Joe's stupidity.
"It's right there you dumb-apple." Hiei told him annoyed and pointed to the clue.
"Oh, there it is, and it's a picture of..." Joe hoping the kids would once again fill in the blank.
"Mrs. Pepper." The kids told him.
"Oh, Mrs. Pepper, well now we need to put this picture in our handy-dandy..."
"Notebook!" The kids shouted once again.
"Yeah, our notebook! *Pulls out notebook and opens it and it draws itself*"
"Hi, I'm Mrs. Pepper. Now, what can Blue want to tell Joe with me? Mrs. Pepper?" The picture told the kids.
"...That's a good idea but we still need two more clues to figure it out." Joe told the kids
"Why does that picture draw itself?" Hiei asked Joe.
"Cause I'm not a very good drawer."
"Figures." Hiei said under his breath.
"Joe! Joe! I need your help!" A voice shouted.
"That sounded like..."
"Mr. Salt." The kids put in for him because he was too stupid to figure it out himself.
"Oh, Mr. Salt. It sounded like it was coming from the kitchen, come on. *Heads into the kitchen to see Mr. Salt on the counter smoking a cigarette* Mr. Salt!" Joe exclaimed.
Hiei was happy to see something that wasn't childish.
"What? What?" Mr. Salt asked taking another puff from the cigarette.
"I thought you were going to give up smoking! Mr. Salt, I think you have a problem." Joe told Mr. Salt.
"Problem? Problem?! I don't have a problem! *Takes big puff of cigarette* I don't have a problem!! How dare you accuse me of having a problem!! I can quit whenever I want to! You hear me?! When I ever I want to!!" Mr. Salt yelled at him taking another puff from the cigarette. Hiei grabbed a cigarette from the counter and put it to his mouth (A/N: I'm not saying Hiei is a smoker and I'm not trying to make him one).
"Hiei, no! Cigarettes are bad for you they make you cough and stuff." Joe told Hiei and took the cigarette away and put it in the garbage. "I thought we agreed that you can only smoke outside."
"But I needed one so badly, I mean Paprika is always asking for me to repair her teddy bear and I told her I would do later, and it took me forever to get Paprika and Cinnamon down for their nap, and I really needed a smoke, I mean really, really needed a smoke really bad." Mr. Salt told them about his busy day.
"Daddy, Daddy!" Paprika shouted as she came up to her dad gripping onto her tiny teddy bear which has stuffing come out of it's arm.
"I thought I put you down for your nap!"
"Yeah, but I can't get to sleep not when Mr. Softy has a boo-boo." Paprika whined as she hugged the small teddy bear.
"*To Joe* See what I have to deal with? *to Paprika* I told you Paprika I'll repair it later, now will you please go and take your nap?" Mr. Salt asked her hopefully.
"But I'm not tired." Paprika told her father.
"Alright, I'll make a deal with you. You can stay up while Joe helps me put up the groceries and then you need to take your nap. Deal?"
"Okay." Paprika said happily.
"Alright, but Mr. Salt you need to put that out." Joe told Mr. Salt pointing to the cigarette.
"Alright, alright." Mr. Salt said and stomped on the cigarette putting it out and put it in the garbage can, then headed to the grocery bag. "First we need to put away this Ice Cream. Where does the Ice Cream go? *Joe, Paprika, Hiei and Mr. Salt head over where there is a cupboard, a fridge and a freezer on top of the fridge* Does it go in the cupboard, the fridge or the freezer?" Mr. Salt asked the kids.
"So, where does the Ice Cream go, in the cupboard? *Points to cupboard* The fridge? *Points to fridge* Or the freezer? *Points to freezer*" Joe asks the kids again.
"The freezer!" The kids shouted.
"Right! The freezer! The Ice Cream has to stay cold so it doesn't melt." Joe told the kids as Mr. Salt handed him the Ice Cream and Joe put it in the freezer. "Okay, what next Mr. Salt?"
"Next this pack of cigarettes, whoops those are mine." Mr. Salt said embarrassed and put in his pocket. "Okay, next we need to find where this carton of milk goes. Does it go in the cupboard, the fridge or the freezer?"
"Does the carton of milk go in the cupboard? Fridge? Or the Freezer?" Joe asked the kids.
"The fridge!" The kids shouted
"Right, the fridge, so the milk can stay nice and cold." Joe told the kids and Mr. Salt hands him the carton of milk and Joe puts it in the fridge.
Joe, Mr. Salt, Paprika and Hiei head over to a spot where the pantry, cupboards, and a breadbox are visible.
"Okay, the next item is bread, where does the bread go? The cupboard? The pantry? Or the bread box?"
"Does the bread go in the cupboard? *Points to cupboard* The pantry? *Points to pantry* Or the breadbox?" Joe asked the kids.
"The breadbox you piece of shoe." Hiei told him still annoyed that he was trapped here and there was no way out.
"Don't be silly Hiei, I'm not a piece of shoe, but you were right it does go in the bread box, because that's where we put the bread." Joe says as Mr. Salt hands him the bread and Joe puts in the breadbox. "I'm so glad you're helping out, see we are having fun, and it's friendly to help someone out like you just did."
Joe gave Hiei a hug and Hiei tried desperately to escape.
"A clue! A clue!" The kids shouted.
Mr. Salt was starting to leave the screen with Paprika to put Paprika to bed for her nap. Joe let go of Hiei and for the first time Hiei was actually happy that the kids found a clue, because Joe let go of him.
"You see a clue? Where?" Joe asked the kids frantically.
"On Mr. Salt!" The kids shouted.
"Mr. Salt wait!" Joe exclaimed and Mr. Salt stopped.
"What is it?" Mr. Salt asked
"There's a clue on you." Joe told Mr. Salt. "Here let me draw you." Joe opens the notebook and a picture of Mr. Salt appears.
"What could Blue want to tell Joe about me, Mr. Salt, and Mrs. Pepper?" The picture of Mr. Salt asked the kids.
Joe closed the notebook. "Hmm...what do you think Blue could want to tell us? Well, we still need to find one last clue." Joe told the kids.
"Mail time! Mail time! Mail time!" A voice sang
"Let's get the mail!" Joe said. "Bye, Mr. Salt, bye Paprika." The dog barked good-bye at them.
Joe, Blue, and Hiei jumped over to where the Thinking Chair was, Hiei backed away slowly because they usually sang songs there.
"Here's the mail it never fails, it makes me wanna wag my tail when it comes I wanna wail *loudly* mail!" Joe sang and grabbed Hiei by the arm and dragged him near the chair and sat down, Blue sat behind the chair, Hiei decided just to stand. "Hey Mailbox, did you meet my new friend Hiei?" Joe asked Mailbox and pointed to Hiei.
"No, hey Hiei, I'm Mailbox. Well, here's your letter." Mailbox said opening to reveal the letter and Joe took it.
Joe opened the letter, to reveal some kids.
"Hey, Joe we know what Blue wants to tell you." The kids in the letter said.
"Really? Tell me, tell me!" Joe said excitedly that he was going to figure it out. Hiei rolled his eyes because he couldn't imagine who would want to mail a letter to him to talk to a crazy person.
"It's...*letter screen gets fuzzy*"
"Bye. Well, we still need to find one last clue." Joe said.
"Joe, Joe! Whoooa!" A voice called out.
"That sounded like Slippery let's go." Joe told the kids, and he Blue, and Hiei who was being dragged by Joe, headed over to the bathroom and see Slippery on the counter near the sink. "Hey, Slippery."
"Hey Joe, hey Blue. Who's that? *Points to Hiei*" Slippery asked.
"Oh, this is our new friend Hiei." Joe told Slippery and gave Hiei another hug and Hiei tried to get out.
"Oh hi Hiei, I'm Slippery." Slippery told Hiei.
"You wanted something Hiei?" Joe asked Slippery.
"Yeah, I have a friend in Chalk World and I need to give him a message." Slippery told them. The Blue dog barked.
"Great idea Blue, Slippery, why don't we deliver the message for you?" Joe told Slippery.
"Okay, I have a friend named Soapy and he's a bubble with a hat, here's the message: "Dear Soapy, I miss you. Your friend Slippery." Slippery told them.
"Dear Soapy, I miss you. Love Slippery." Joe recited to himself. "Don't worry we'll tell Soapy." Joe told Slippery.
Joe, Blue and Hiei walked into another room and Blue skidooed into a Chalk Board.
"What the fudge did that dog do?" Hiei asked Joe.
"She skidooed inside that chalkboard. Come on. *Grabs Hiei by the arm* *singing* Blue's skidoo we can too. *In chalk world* *Blue is standing next to Hiei and Joe* Wow, we're in chalk world! And look *picks up a giant piece of chalk* chalk! I know, I know, let's draw some waves, *Draws waves* Well, we can't get around in this water." Joe told the kids.
"You drew the waves to begin with in the first place." Hiei told him.
"Well, what could we draw to get around in this water?" Joe asked the kids.
"A boat!" The kids told him.
"Yeah a boat!" Joe exclaimed and drew what actually looked like a bowl. Joe and Blue get in the bowl, but Hiei just stands there. "Come on, Hiei!" Joe told him.
"No, I'm perfectly fine right here." Hiei told them and not moving.
Joe yanked on his arm and Hiei fell in the little cup.
"Well, we aren't moving. What could we use to help us move?" Joe asked the kids
"An oar!" The kids shouted.
"Yeah, an oar!" Joe exclaimed and Blue drew an oar, and started to paddle. Soon a big wave started to follow them. "Oh no, it's a wave! What can we do to get rid of that wave?"
"Erase it." Hiei told him.
"Great idea Hiei!!" Joe grabbed an eraser out of nowhere and erased the wave. While Joe wasn't looking Hiei took the piece out chalk and drew a gun evilly and pulled the trigger and flower came out. Hiei rolled his eyes and took the flowers out of the gun and threw the gun in the water. "Flowers for me? You're becoming friendlier than I thought, Hiei."
"Say that again and I'll punch your lights out." Hiei told him.
"Alright you're becoming more friendly Hiei." Joe told him.
Hiei made a fist and tried to punch Joe but ended hugging him.
In the real world, at Keiko's house.
Keiko was babysitting her toddler cousin; Yusuke was there to keep Keiko company. Her cousin just arrived and Keiko turned on the TV so she could watch Blue's Clues, there was Hiei hugging Joe.
"Oh, my god, that's not what I think I saw!" Yusuke said laughing uncontrollably.
"Yusuke, I'm sure there's a perfectly good reason why Hiei is hugging that guy, besides not like you ever do it." Keiko told him.
Back in Blue's Clues Land
'I didn't do what I think I did.' Hiei thought to himself and backed away quickly. (A/N: This does not mean they're going to be in a relationship or anything)
"Hiei, that was so nice."
"Don't read too much into that." Hiei told Joe turning away quickly.
Soon Hiei, Joe and Blue were floating in their boat exhausted. Hiei was banging his head repeatedly on the side of the boat. Soon a bubble with a hat floated by, and Joe remembered what Slippery said his friend looked like.
"Are you Soapy?" Joe asked the bubble.
"That's me." Soapy said.
"I got a message for you from your friend Slippery."
"Let's hear it." Soapy told Joe.
"I can't remember it, can you tell me?" Joe asked the kids
"Dear Soapy, I miss you. Your friend Slippery." The kids told Joe.
"Dear, Soapy, I miss you. Your friend Slippery." Joe repeated
"Wow, he misses me? Thanks." Soapy said and floated off. Blue took the piece of chalk and drew a picture of home and skidooed.
"Come on." Joe told the kids as the music to Blue's Skidoo played and Joe and Hiei skidooed into the house.
"A clue! A clue!" The kids shouted
"A clue? Where?" Joe asked the kids.
"Right there, on the doll." The kids told Joe.
"Oh, there a clue on this baby doll. Well, we need to put it in our handy- dandy..."
"Notebook." The kids told him
"Yeah. *Takes out notebook and a picture of a baby doll appears*"
"What could Blue want to tell Joe with, Mr. Salt, Mrs. Pepper and a baby doll?" The baby doll asked the kids.
Joe closed the notebook.
"Well, that's our last clue...that was our last clue! You know what that
means we get to sit in our..."
"Thinking Chair!" The kids shouted.
"Yeah let's go!" Joe told the kids and ran to the Thinking Chair
dragging Hiei. When they got to the
Thinking Chair, Joe sat down and Hiei stood. "Okay, so what does Blue
want to tell us with Mr. Salt, Mrs.
Pepper, and a baby doll?"
"They're having a baby." The kids told him.
"Is that what you want to tell us Blue? *Blue nods* Mr. Salt and Mrs. Pepper going to have a baby! We just figured out Blue's Clues. *Singing* We sat on down figured it out, what Blue's Clues is all about, wow, you know what? We're really smart." Joe finished singing and Mr. Salt, Mrs. Pepper, Paprika, and Cinnamon were next to chair, Mrs. Pepper had a sort big lump on her stomach about the size of kiwi.
"Wow, Mrs. Pepper you're going to have another baby? *Mrs. Pepper
nods* That means that Paprika and
Cinnamon are going to have a new brother or sister."
"We were just headed to the hospital to have my ultrasound." Mrs. Pepper told Joe, Blue and Hiei.
"Oh, by the way this Hiei, everyone he's our new friend." Joe told the group Hiei growled quietly.
"Oh, hi Hiei, hey, do you guys want to come to my ultrasound?" Mrs. Pepper asked them.
"Sure, but what is an ultrasound?" Joe asked Mrs. Pepper.
"An ultrasound is something were the doctors are able to see my baby on a screen, were they can see if the baby is good shape, if there's anything wrong with the baby, if there's more than one child, and even find out the gender of the baby." Mrs. Pepper told them.
"Wow, an ultrasound must be pretty helpful."
"Yes, they are." Mrs. Pepper says.
"Well, let's go." Joe says and everyone heads over to the hospital, soon Mrs. Pepper is called in, Blue, Joe, Hiei, Mr. Salt, Paprika, and Cinnamon follow.
"Okay, today we're going to check the baby. First, I'm going to put some gel on you *puts gel on Mrs. Pepper* and I'll move this around and there's your baby. *Points to screen where two babies are visible* Mrs. Pepper it looks like you're going to have twins." The doctor told everyone.
"Twins? I need a smoke." Mr. Salt said and left the room to have his smoke.
"Wow, twins, Paprika, Cinnamon, that means you'll have two siblings. Doctor are they healthy?" Joe asked the doctor.
"They sure are." Doctor said.
Joe and Blue left the room and started singing again.
"Now, it's time for so long, but we'll sing just one more song, thanks for doing your part you're sure are smart it's just me and you and we can do anything that wanna do. *stops singing and is waving good-bye* Bye. So long."
A/N: Did you like it well did you? Please review, pleeeease! Don't flame!