THE GALA

A/N: This is my first TBBT story I've written, and the first fanfic I've published (2nd I've written, I'm part way through a much longer NCIS fic that I'll post once I've finished it. Been distracted by Shenny lately), so hopefully the voices are close to realistic. And I have two more Shenny's in progress that hopefully I'll get finished soon.

Set sometime season 2-ish I guess, nothing specific but they have lived across from each other for a while by this point.

Words: 4487

Disclaimer: If I owned any of this, do you really think I'd be spending my time writing fanfics instead of just fixing the show?

Complete for now, but this could be continued, or a sequel could be written if there's enough interest.

Knock, knock, knock.
"Penny"
Knock, knock, knock.
"Penny"
Knock, knock, knock.
"Penny"

At the first knock, Penny got up from where she'd been sitting on her couch and walked over to the door. She waited until he finished his knocking routine, and then opened the door. "What's awry, Moonpie?" she cheerfully greeted him.

While he was certainly the weirdest person she'd ever met, and that was saying something given a few of the guys she had dated, he was also one of the nicest, in his own weird way, and she enjoyed his visits. Well, most of the time, anyway.

"I need you to be my plus one," he said in his matter-of-fact voice.

She raised her eyebrows and tilted her head at him a little bit, hoping he would explain, but as usual he just stood there looking at her. "Excuse me?"

"I was invited to the California Scientific Gala, and the RSVP says plus one." As he said this, she finally noticed the small, fancy-looking card he was holding in his hand, and it dawned on her what he was talking about. He had apparently been invited to some fancy science thing, which must be quite important if he actually wants to go, and it says he can bring a plus one. But Sheldon being Sheldon, he assumed it means he must bring a plus one, instead of can bring a plus one, so he was asking her to be his plus one. Good grief he could be so infuriating sometimes. Is it really that hard for him to start with the explanation, in English, instead of just assuming everyone knows what you're talking about?

As she looked back up to his expectant eyes, her explanation of how a plus one wasn't a non-optional social convention and how it was completely acceptable for him to go alone (Heaven knew most of these science nerds would be going alone) died in her throat. He was asking her to go with him to this fancy science thing of his, even if it was just because he thought he had to. She couldn't say no. And anyway, as boring as the science talk would be, it still sounded like a fancy party, and she wasn't the type to turn down a party, fancy or otherwise.

"When is it?" she asked, holding out her hand for the card.

"Saturday," he replied, handing her the card.

Well, there goes another date night hanging out with Sheldon instead, she thought to herself as she skimmed the card. Well, more likely Laundry night, since that's what my Saturdays have been recently. 'Black Tie Gala' she read on the card. That could be fun, at least I get to dress up fancy, which beats what I've been doing most Saturdays recently.

"One condition," she said. "You let me take you shopping to get you a decent suit to wear to it. Something that isn't plaid." As his face began to twitch slightly, she added, "And I'll take you by the comic book store afterwards."

At this he sighed and nodded his head, and said, "Deal."

The following evening she walked across the hall to Sheldon and Leonard's door.

Knock, knock, knock.
"Sheldon"
Knock, knock, knock.
"Sheldon"
Knock, knock, knock.
"Sheldon"

"Come in," she heard Leonard say with a bit of annoyance. Apparently he did not find Sheldon's knocking as amusing as she did.

"Sheldon ready?" she asked.

"He's in his room, he'll be out in a minute," Leonard replied. After a few seconds of silence, he spoke again. "I still don't understand why you're doing this. All you had to do was tell him a plus one isn't a non-optional social convention, and he could have gone by himself."

"I know, but he asked me to go with him. It's cute."

"He only asked you because you're the only girl he knows to ask," grumbled Leonard. Penny didn't bother to respond as at that moment Sheldon walked into the living room.

"Hi sweetie, you ready?" she asked him.

"I still don't see why I can't wear the suit I have," he grumbled.

"Oh honey, because it looks horrendous," she replied. "And it's the only way I'm taking you to the comic book store. Come on." He reluctantly followed her out the door and down the stairs.

As Sheldon walked out of the changing room, Penny's jaw dropped. It wasn't that Sheldon wasn't attractive, but all he ever wore was superhero shirts (with another shirt underneath it, of course) or his slightly terrifying plaid suit that made Leonard's dress clothes look almost acceptable. This was the first time she had ever seen him properly dressed up, and she was amazed at how nice he looked. It was a simple black suit, but with Sheldon it worked really well. After gaping for a few more seconds, she realized she should probably stop gaping and say something. "You look amazing," she finally managed to say.

"But it's just one color," he whined.

"Trust me, you look incredible. You're a genius at all the sciency stuff, but this is my area of expertise." Sheldon continued to look grumpy, but he didn't say anything else. "Come on, change back into your normal clothes so we can pay for it, and then we can go look for a dress for me to match."

"You didn't say anything about you getting a dress," whined Sheldon. "You said we would go to the comic book store after I got my suit."

Good grief, he's such a child Penny thought to herself, he looks like he's about to start stomping his foot and throw a tantrum. So before he could, she placatingly said, "We will, I promise, but I can't exactly be your plus one if I don't have anything to wear."

He looked as if he wanted to point out the fact that she clearly had more clothes than she could ever possibly need, so she couldn't 'not have anything to wear,' but a quick glare from Penny and he sulked back to the changing room.

When they finally got to the store Penny was looking for, she decided she didn't want Sheldon to see what she would be wearing until the night of the event. Maybe I can get some kind of an actually human reaction out of him if I spring it on him. So she bought him an ice cream and told him to wait on the benches outside the store while she picked out a dress. She quickly found the quite-stunning-if-she-said-so-herself strapless dress she'd noticed on a previous trip to the store, but hadn't had any excuse to buy. Swiftly trying it on, she knew if she had any chance to make Sheldon stare at her, this was it; admittedly, she would also have to put up with Leonard (and of course Howard, who she had no doubt would be hanging out) briefly, but if it made Sheldon notice her, really notice her, it would be worth it.

After they got back to the apartment, they parted ways, setting a time to leave the following evening.

Penny had hoped to be able to meet Sheldon in the hallway and avoid Leonard (and of course Howard), but she finished getting ready ten minutes before they were supposed to leave, and was too anxious about whether Sheldon was going to follow through and wear the suit, that she broke down and crossed the hall to 4A. Opening the door without knocking, she headed straight towards Sheldon's room. She could feel the stares and slack-jawed expressions on the three guys' faces (well, maybe not Raj, one advantage of him not being able to speak to her was that he never seemed quite as infatuated with her as the other two did), but she did not acknowledge them, and she was in the back hallway before they could recover enough to speak.

His door was open, and he was sitting on the end of his bed tying his shoes. As she momentarily stood on the threshold of his bedroom, she wondered how the suit could manage to look even better now than it had when she saw him in it in the store. She mentally shook the thought out of her mind as Sheldon finally sensed she was there and looked up. For a split second she saw his eyes start to grow, before he got control of himself and his expression returned to normal.

"You look lovely this evening," he said, as though it were another non-optional social convention. But she had seen his eyes ever so slightly betray his calm and composed exterior as they lingered over her just a second longer than they normally would have. To most girls, or to Penny with any other guy for that matter, his reaction, or seeming lack thereof, would have been a disappointment. But Penny knew better. She had been around Sheldon long enough to know that those subtle deviations from normal were Sheldon's version of gaping, and inside she was completely screaming. But she kept her expression calm, and replied, "Why thank you, Sheldon. You look very handsome yourself."

And when he didn't respond with any sharp quip, she knew he was rather pleased with how he looked as well, despite all his complaining about the suit the day before (and all that day as well to anyone who would listen, she had no doubt). As he walked past her and out into the hallway, she slid her arm through his, and they walked towards the living room arm in arm; or as arm in arm as could be with his arms hanging straight down as though he was trying to keep his arm from accidentally touching her's. I promise I don't have cooties, Sheldon.

"We're off," she said, hoping to stem off any comments, as they walked back into the living room. Leonard and Howard's faces reassumed the shape they had just finally recovered from. As she hurried Sheldon through the living room to the door, she gave Raj, the only one not gaping at her, a bright smile, and he gave a quick, awkward wave and small smile in return. He really is the nicest of those three, she thought to herself. As they made it across the room, Leonard's face managed to change to a look of jealousy and possessiveness, but it wasn't until they reached the door that his mouth finally came unstuck.

"Enjoy yourselves," he said, in a sulky voice. Fortunately she was already shutting the door behind them, and could just ignore him.

"Excited?" she asked Sheldon in a cheerful voice, looking up at him as they started to descend the stairs.

"Penny, this is a gathering of the greatest scientific minds in the state. A sharing of recent accomplishments in hopes of bettering oneself in front of peers. It is not something one gets, as you say, 'excited' about. This is not one of your kind of parties."

Not acting like that it certainly isn't. "Wait, peers? I thought you didn't have any peers?"

"Don't be silly, Penny. Of course I don't. But most of the people here are peers to each other; at a lower intellectual level than myself, obviously."

Of course, how silly of me. "Oh, so are you here to lord your superiority over them, then?"

"Of course not, Penny. They already know, or they wouldn't be giving me an award."

Wow, Sheldon, that's arrogant even for— "Wait?! Did you just say award?"

"Yes, an award. Why else did you think I was coming? I don't need to 'hang out', as you put it, with lesser scientific minds like these. I am being awarded the state's Scientist of the Year Award. And while I of course have no interest in insignificant awards such as this, even I know that it is impolite to turn down such an invitation. It gives them a chance to acknowledge the greater scientific minds, and gives them an example to strive towards."

As he talked, Penny's mind was whirring. He had simultaneously insulted everyone else coming to the Gala and revealed that he had won what sounded like the most prestigious award offered at the Gala. She wasn't sure whether to be amazed at the fact he won Scientist of the Year, or smack him for his unending arrogance. In the end she settled for choking out, "You're the star of this gathering?! Why didn't you tell me?!"

"It didn't seem relevant to asking you if you would come as my plus one," he replied matter-of-factly.

Oh Sheldon, you really have so much to learn. "Do Leonard and the guys know you won? Did you tell them you won?" she corrected herself as he started to open his mouth.

"No, I did not tell them. But they may know, Scientist of the Year is not a well kept secret." Penny just shook her head, and continued driving, at a loss for how to explain to Sheldon why he should have told them that he'd won.

Finally arriving at the Gala, they got out of the car and walked towards the entrance. Penny once again wrapped her arm around his; for her part at least she was going to act like a normal plus one. She knew Sheldon wasn't going to do his part as her date, but she still might be able to convince people that they were really together if she played her part well. Wait, why on earth was she trying to convince people they were together? Sheldon certainly didn't care if people thought he had a girlfriend or not; he didn't even realize people would think she was his girlfriend. She brushed the questions out of her mind as they approached the entrance.

At the door, the lady checking everyone in immediately recognized Sheldon. Apparently he really is well known in the scientific community. "Hi Doctor Cooper. And I assume this is your girlfriend?"

As Sheldon opened his mouth to contradict her and start explaining that she was just his plus one (he really doesn't understand what a plus one means, does he?), Penny cut him off. "Yes, I am. My name's Penny," she said, holding out her hand. As the lady shook it and smiled warmly at them, Penny realized what she had said. Of course, it also helped that Sheldon was staring at her like she had lost what little mind she had. Fortunately, the lady didn't notice, and Sheldon had enough sense not to say anything at that moment (or he's too shocked to say anything, she thought). So before he could say anything, she dragged him out into the party.

"Why did you say you were my girlfriend?" So Sheldon had finally found his voice again. Her first thought was to say something along the lines of 'it's a non-optional social convention', but she decided on saying instead, "Sweetie, it's what people expect when you bring a plus one. It'll be a lot easier than constantly having to explain."

"But we aren't girlfriend/boyfriend."

Of course Sheldon would say that.

"Look Moonpie, you know that I'm not your girlfriend, and I know that I'm not your girlfriend, but that's what it looks like to everyone here. Especially with me dressed like this. And it doesn't really make any difference to you, it's not like you'll ever see any of these people again."

Was it just her, or did it sound like she was trying to convince him to let her play his girlfriend?

"What does your clothing choice have to do with whether people think we are having coitus or not?" he asked seriously.

Oh, Sheldon honey, you really can be so clueless sometimes. And blunt.

Fortunately at this point an older gentleman walked up to them.

"Hi Doctor Cooper, I'm Doctor Newton, head of the Gala. You and your girlfriend will be sitting over here with us," he said, shaking Sheldon's hand, and then Penny's.

Penny breathed a sigh of relief when Sheldon followed Dr. Newton without saying anything, and soon found herself seated next to Sheldon at a table with several other obviously prominent scientists. Apparently prominent enough that Sheldon was talking to them as if they were almost equals. Almost.

Completely lost to the scientific discussion going on at the table, Penny decided to occupy her time people watching. She was rather surprised by the number scientists who had brought dates. Apparently not all scientists were as clueless as Sheldon, as bad at understanding girls as Leonard, as creepy as Howard, or as physically incapable of talking to girls as Raj. Genius apparently was the new sexy.

Soon enough dinner was served and then the award ceremony began. After a handful of smaller awards, they presented Sheldon with his. To her surprise, he accepted it almost humanly, and just barely insulted everyone there in his acceptance speech. Which she didn't understand a word of, but it sounded to her like an acceptance speech should. Apparently Sheldon could act like a normal human being when surrounded by people similar to him. Or as normal as any of them, at least.

After he finished speaking, and the award ceremony officially ended, scientists swarmed around Sheldon to congratulate him and ask him questions, leaving Penny by herself off to the side. But not for long, as people began coming up to her as well; well, mostly girlfriends (or boyfriends of the female scientists) like her, but a few of the scientists as well. Most of them were congratulating her on landing the Scientist of the Year, or wanting to know how she did it. By the time the tenth person had asked her how they met, she had a well crafted story that even she would have believed. It wasn't until Sheldon walked back over several minutes later, just as she had launched into the story for a cute couple from Stanford, that she realized just how naturally she was telling the story, as if it really was true, and not something she had made up and tweaked on the spot. She was glad he was too busy asking if they could leave yet to question her story. Maybe he hadn't heard it.

She quickly excused herself from the few people still around her, and started walking with Sheldon towards the exit. "Enjoy the party?" she asked him once they were out in the parking lot.

"It was bearable."

"I never realized how well known you are."

"How many times do I have to tell you I'm the smartest theoretical scientist in the world?"

"I know, I know. I guess I just didn't realize how many scientists there were who could understand you well enough to appreciate what you do. I certainly didn't understand anything you said."

"Of course you didn't, Penny. I'm a theoretical physicist, and you're a community college dropout."

Gee, thanks Sheldon, you always make me feel so good about myself.

"So who and all were the other scientists there?" she asked, climbing into her car. Sheldon then proceeded to spend the rest of the ride back to the apartment telling her all about the other scientists and what they had done. Penny, of course, understood almost nothing of what he was saying (oh, who was she kidding, she didn't understand anything he said), but she knew he was happy to talk science, so she let her mind wander as he rambled on. As much as he might claim it was just 'bearable', if his current ramblings were any indication, he had quite enjoyed the Gala, or at least all the attention he got at it.

As for her, she had had the best Saturday evening she'd had in a long time, which was weird considering the fact she had been on a few actual dates over the past few months. Admittedly, those usually ended with a little more fun than this outing would, but Sheldon's company had been more pleasant than a few (ok, most, if she was being honest with herself) of those guys, even if she didn't understand 90% of what he had said that evening, and 9 out of the remaining 10% was him insulting her (okay, so she might be being a little harsh there). It had to just be the fact she got to dress up and show off in a dress she wouldn't have had any other reason to get, right? Fortunately she didn't have to dwell on this for long as they soon pulled into the apartment parking lot.

"Thank you for inviting me, Sheldon," she said as they climbed the stairs.

"Of course, Penny," he replied.

"Hi, we're back," Penny said as she opened the door to 4A.

"So, how did it go?" asked Leonard as they walked into the living room. Before Penny could reply, Sheldon answered.

"Apparently Penny and I are dating now. I'm not sure why Penny never mentioned it to me, but she was telling everyone how we met and started dating," he said as mater-of-factly as he ever said anything else.

Oh crap. He heard.

Leonard's mouth dropped for the third time that day, and this time it wasn't because of Penny's dress.

Normally Penny would have dismissed it as a joke, but this was Sheldon, and she wasn't sure he even knew how to joke. He actually thought they were dating now. Ignoring Leonard, she turned to Sheldon and said, "Honey, can we talk for a second?" before walking towards his room. A few seconds later, he entered his room, and she shut the door so that Leonard couldn't eavesdrop.

"Sheldon, I know you think that because I was telling everyone how we met that that means that we are dating. But it really doesn't, sweetie. I made up the story because it was easier than trying to explain that we're really just friends, and you invited me to come as a friend. We aren't actually dating, you don't have to worry." Was what she meant to say. Honestly. She really did mean to say that.

But what actually came out of her mouth was, "Are you upset with me for not telling you that we are dating?"

What. The. HELL?! Where did that come from?

As her mind scrambled to come up with a way to backtrack, she heard him speaking. It took a few seconds for her brain to realize what he had said.

"I do think I should have been informed."

Oh no, he's taking me seriously! Wait, he's taking me seriously but he hasn't told me in no uncertain terms that he is above dating, or kicked me out of his room yet?

"I'm sorry, Moonpie, I should have told you. That was selfish of me."

Wait, was that me? Did I just say that? Well, there's no one else in here, and Sheldon didn't say it, so the only option left would be me.

"But you do understand a relationship with me does require a certain amount of physical contact, right? Not as much as I would normally expect, but there has to be some."

Good grief, there goes my mouth again, she thought. I'm really going to have to get control of it somehow, and quickly, or who knows what it will say or do.

"I am aware that physical contact is an expected part of the relationship paradigm."

By this point her brain had finally caught up to her mouth, and Penny was able to think before she replied. On one hand, she could explain to him that she hadn't really meant that they were dating and that he was free to continue his not dating, not physically intimate life; or, she could go along with what he believed and gain a boyfriend. A boyfriend that was the complete opposite of her normal type, and a boyfriend that she'd never even considered as a potential boyfriend before that night, but a boyfriend who was certainly nicer than most of the guys she had dated, including the jerk who was currently in the living room expecting them to return at any moment and explain that it was all just a joke. She decided to go with the latter.

"Well sweetie, if you really think you can handle that, then we can continue dating."

Oh, she knew she was going to have hell to pay when she finally explained to him that they really hadn't been dating before then, and that there was no reason for him to start dating her then.

He nodded his solemnly.

"All right then, step one."

She slowly reached up and gently took his face in her hands. Then standing on her tiptoes, she lightly met his lips with hers, kissing him gently, but purposefully. She held it for a few seconds before drawing back and dropping her hands. He hadn't kissed back, but he also hadn't tried to push her away, and he wasn't rushing to cleanse his mouth with mouthwash. Baby steps, she thought to herself, baby steps.

"Don't worry, sleeping in the same bed isn't part of step one," she said smiling up at him before turning and opening the door. She walked back into the living room, where Leonard was pretending to work on his laptop, with Sheldon following behind her.

"Sorry about that, I was busy kissing my boyfriend. Well, it's late, I'll see you guys tomorrow," and she was out the door before Leonard could respond.

Leonard turned towards Sheldon, a look of disbelief so etched on his face that it would likely never come off, but before he could formulate a coherent question, Sheldon said, "It's past my bedtime as well," and disappeared into his room, leaving a stunned Leonard sitting completely by himself.

Maybe this is all just a really bad dream. I'll go to bed, wake up tomorrow morning, and none of this will have actually happened. Everything will be exactly the same as it's always been, he thought to himself as he got up and headed to bed.

The following morning, when Leonard woke up, he slowly remembered the events of the previous night. Please let it just be a dream, please let it just be a dream... He slowly got up, and then hesitantly walked towards the kitchen. It had to just be a dream, it had to— His thought was cut short by the image of Penny, wearing what she had obviously slept in, standing in their kitchen, pouring herself a cup of coffee, without Sheldon standing near her glaring at her or complaining about her being in their apartment eating their food.

"Morning, Leonard," she greeted him cheerfully, before walking over to the couch and plopping down next to Sheldon.

So much for it all just being a dream.