Is This Our Farwell
Beta read by the amazing and talented Viedyn. Title comes from the Within Temptation song, Our Farewell. Always thought Kavar and Talia had something between them and I'll take any excuse to make a Jedi break the Code. ;)
~*~
Talia smiled lightly when the flash of a blue lightsabre blade came into view as she approached the throne room. The Queen had to admit to having a curiosity about the sword-like weapon. She had always thought the Jedi weapon to be much like Kavar himself graceful but deadly. The Queen paused at the door for a moment, content to watch Kavar lightly leap around, blade whirling, the one whom he called the Exile copying him.
'Of course, there won't be much time left to gaze upon him, will there?' She thought sadly and for one fleeting moment Talia wondered if it would have been worth prolonging the Civil War just to be able to spend more time with him. Then the madness passed. 'He told me that when the Sith finally revealed themselves, the Jedi would have to act. And that will be a battle in which I can offer next to no assistance. He'll get himself killed.'
As if on cue, Kavar disengaged his weapon and nodded at his fellow Jedi. "I'm going to Dantooine, to the council. Now that the Sith have revealed themselves, we can act," and Talia thought she could hear the snap of her heart breaking. It had been inevitable. Proving his sometimes annoyingly superior Jedi senses, Kavar looked over the Exile's shoulder, locking eyes with Talia as if he had heard the shatter.
He brushed past her as he left the hall and she felt a familiar weight land in the outer pockets of her robe. Her face betrayed nothing of her thoughts as she treated the Exile to her uniform smile, the one all royals practised to hide their emotions, all the while thinking that had Kavar not been a Jedi he could have become the best pick-pocket in the galaxy.
Her meeting with the Exile quickly over, Talia removed the data pad from its hiding place. A simple message was displayed on the screen: 'The Museum.' Talia shook her head amusedly; Kavar was nothing if not direct in his messages, completely at odds with his usual cryptic spoken advice.
It was something she had called him on numerous times. Each time all she had gotten out of him was an innocent, and admittedly charming, smile. Sometimes she wondered if Kavar only used the 'Jedi talk' to tease her. After all, Kavar didn't seem to at all like the people described to her by the numerous ambassadors and aides on hand; the stoic guardians of peace, incapable of love and passion. She knew first hand how false that was.
Their relationship had started not too long after he'd arrived on Onderon, when he'd marched into her throne room and declared his title as a Jedi Master and his intent to help her stand against Vaklu even as he dodged the weapons fire from her guards. His first official day on the job, she'd given him a tongue lashing about properly announcing oneself before entering a room. And so Kavar had become her advisor, his sound advice making him her most trusted advisor, his intelligence and wit earned him the title of her friend and his caring nature and sympathetic ear made him her lover.
A fond smile appeared on her face at the memories as she turned into the Museum corridor. Riiken and Bustco were organising the troops to end the fighting in the streets, but until then it was pointless to think about supplies and rebuilding. 'Please,' Talia thought, 'just give me these few hours and I'll work days, even weeks, without a break. Just a few hours.'
They had long used the datapads to arrange private meetings away from prying eyes. Usually in her quarters, study or bed chamber, so the fact it was in the museum told her he was leaving soon – very soon. She scowled as she reached out to the data panel to enter the code that would open the door. Talia had never liked hurried goodbyes. They were careless, devaluing the affection one had for the person leaving.
Kavar was examining one of the vases in the Museum when she entered, running his fingers over the scene painted on its surface: Freedon Nadd ascending the throne of Onderon. "Interesting artefact for a Jedi to be perusing," Talia said as she came to stand next to him, studying the melancholy expression on his face. 'He doesn't wish to go,' she realised.
"I'm not much of a Jedi anymore. No one is. No Order to lead, no Council to confer with and I never thought I'd be one to," here humour twisted Kavar's face, "'Pull a Bindo', as it's called. But perhaps Jolee was right; that we should be teaching Jedi to control their emotions while in love, instead of the outright ban," He turned to look at her, face pained. "I wish I could stay with you."
Talia shook her head. "You wish, but you will not – and could not. You and I both know you would never be happy. This is your duty and you know that. I do not begrudge you this, how could I? I knew who I was falling in love with." At those words he reached for her, drawing her close to him. Talia sighed and rested her head against his shoulder, wishing once more they had more time. "No matter what you say, you are a Jedi. This is a Jedi's duty."
Kavar kissed her forehead and buried his nose in her hair as if to memorise its scent. "Thank you… for understanding," he murmured.
"I've known this day was coming since you told me of the Jedi's mission to draw out the Sith. You've accomplished your task here. Tasks. Vaklu is finished, the Civil War will be over by morning and the Sith have revealed themselves." Talia turned around in Kavar's arms to face him and raised one hand to his face, thumb moving over his cheek. "You don't have to protect me anymore." She said quietly.
Kavar laughed quietly, "Your skill with a sword proved that. Vaklu had no idea what hit him."
Talia smiled, but there was no humour in her expression. She reached for his hands. "Just…be careful out there. You take too many risks."
"I'm always careful," Kavar replied and Talia rolled her eyes.
"You have to stop saying that. I swear it is a jinx. Do you remember how the meeting with the Exile ended?"
"I came back, didn't I?" Kavar asked and Talia swallowed.
"Yes. Thankfully."
The Jedi Master paused, studying her. Beneath her relatively controlled exterior, he could still sense her fear for him. "I promise then. To be careful. And return." He murmured and was rewarded for his words by a brilliant smile from his lover.
"It may not be within your power," Talia warned, face grave. She bit her lip before fumbling in the pockets of her skirt. "Take this." She held out a crystal in the palm of her hand. "It has long been a symbol of luck and protection for the royal family. But it is also lightsabre crystal and I believe that you may have a more practical use for it than I."
"Talia, I-" She cut off his protests with a stern shake of her head and took his hand, placing the crystal in his palm and closing his fist around it. "Humour me." 'I can not do much to keep you safe, but I can do this.' Kavar nodded and slipped the crystal into the inner pockets of his robe and Talia breathed a sigh of relief. Onderon royalty still believed in superstition, perhaps a by-product of their Force bloodlines, and Talia was no exception. 'A naïve act, but it will ease my mind at least. A little.'
"Thank you."
"I shall apply it to my lightsabre the moment I get to a workbench. There should be one on the shuttle. I called ahead; it should be prepped now."
"That is another privilege you shall miss; royal transports at your beck and call." Talia laughed slightly, her chuckle becoming a soft sob. Kavar swallowed and reached out to brush his thumb against her cheek.
"I love you," he murmured softly before drawing the Queen to him, arms encircling her body and holding her close. Their lips meet and Talia poured everything she was feeling into the kiss: her love, loss, pride and pain. They broke away with a gasp and the Queen found the Jedi's hand.
"Come to bed with me?" She asked, slowly drawing Kavar to the door, pleading eyes fixed on his. "One last time, one last memory?" She continued, although it was evident by the look on his face she didn't need to wheedle.
Talia could not grudge herself this need. She knew that even though she was sure when she awoke in a few hours he would be gone and his side of the bed would be cold and she would spend the first few minutes of waking weeping.
She was right.
~*~
'Sith's Blood, what do they take me for? An errand boy? I'm Mandalore not some common civilian slime,' Canderous thought, fidgeting, as he awaited his audience with Queen Talia. 'It's always the same with these damned Jedi. Always errands, favours and quests. That Exile, she tells me to prepare for a threat and Revan…well, she told me the same. But that was Revan…'
"Uh, excuse me? Um, Sir?"
Canderous blinked behind his helmet and focused on the nervous looking aide before him. "Her Majesty is now ready for you."
"About time," the Mandalorian snarled and strode forward, quickly out pacing the aide. The doors to the throne room opened and Canderous continued inward, never pausing in his stride, although behind the armour, his face wore a surprised expression. Even though she was sitting some distance away from him the pregnant belly of the Queen was obvious.
"Your Majesty," he said, inclining his head but refusing to bow. "I was bidden to come to you by-"
"The Exile. About Kavar," The Queen interrupted, nodding her head. "Yes, I have expected you. Or at least, someone, for awhile now. It was good of her to send word."
"I suspect then you know what I have to report. Master Kavar is dead, by the hands of the Sith, on Dantooine," Canderous replied, blunt as usual. His eyes narrowed as he watched how the Queen took the news.
To her credit, the casual observer would not find anything amiss. But Canderous was anything but casual. He saw the Queen's eyes glisten with tears and the pain flash across her face for a moment. But it was how her hand fell to her swollen stomach that interested him the most.
"It is what I feared then. When he did not return nor send a message…but I thank you for telling me," Talia regained control of her emotions and rose from her throne. "But if you will excuse me, I have much to do. I will contact your camp in a few days to organise diplomatic talks."
Canderous watched her leave, a smirk twisting his lips. Now he knew why the Exile had been so insistent that he deliver news of Kavar's death to Talia. Though how she knew, he didn't know…
'Damned Jedi mind tricks,' he thought, allowing himself to be escorted back to the Palace foyer. An image of Revan and Republic flashed unbidden in his mind and he shook his head slightly. 'Jedi Code my ass,' Canderous thought, never more thankful for the face hiding helmet that allowed the feared leader to truly smile for a moment. Just one moment.