Standing outside of the girl you loves' wedding is a painful experience, even more so when you weren't invited and you're wedding crashing. That is what I am doing right now, standing outside of Lilly Evans wedding. It is a very sunny day, perfect for an outdoor wedding. I smiled at the thought. Lilly had always planned on having an outdoor wedding. She said that being around nature is when she was her happiest. In the past she had added me to that list, "being outside surrounded by nature with Severus".
My left arm burned, the dark mark. I ignore the sensation; it wasn't a call for me anyway. He knew I was here, and as ridiculous as it sounded to him, he allowed me to come.
"Compassionate." He has called himself. Bloody ridiculous if you ask my opinion. But I just smiled and thanked him several times over, to show my humble appreciation. After all I am the youngest member in his ranks and his most trusted. I honestly don't know if that means I should be eternally grateful or worried about the stability and purity of my soul. The last of the guests were walking in and I fell into step with their group.
Inside was mostly made up of that god-awful Potters family and their "shared" friends. Though Black and Lupin were in the back being best men. Pettigrew finally got some sense into himself and joined the ranks of the Dark Lord and was unable to make it today. Of course everyone else just thought he had a family thing going on.
The signaled for us all to sit down. I sat near the front and I smiled at people who did recognize me and knew that I was not invited; it made me prideful that everyone knew about me and Lily. It also made me sober, because it always brought the reason why she wasn't marrying me. One stupid word. It pushed her into someone else's arm and pulled her out of mine. What I wouldn't give to go back and change that day, change that one sentence that cursed my life.
When Potter and then entered the room, I had a serious smirk on my face as I pulled out my wand and I halted time. Everyone froze; it was awkward standing up and walking to Potter with no one else moving. I pulled out my flask, gripped a bunch of Potters hair and placed it in the potion. I pulled out the wizard robes that I had brought and slipped then on. After swallowing the god-awful potion and letting the transformation occur, I grabbed potter by the collar and dragged his time frozen body into a closet. I put a body bind on him, silenced the closet, and magically locked the door.
I stood where Potter had been and undid the time bind. Black ran into my paused body.
"Something wrong, mate?" he asked. I shook my head and smiled.
"I'm marrying Lilly Evans." Potter's voice flooded my ears, how odd. "What could possibly be wrong?" Black smiled at me and we took our places in front of the church. We were only there for a few seconds, but the time Lily came out, I was already in the mindset that she was actually marrying me, and not the man I was pretending to be.
She looked absolutely stunning. Her dress was not white, but a silver color. It was held up by one strap that went around her neck and attached on both sides. The dress flowed to the floor and had a small train. I felt my jaw hit the floor, she was so beautiful.
She was the object of everyone's attention. And she deserved it. She had tears in her eyes already as she beamed up at me, Potter, and I felt my heart both break and fly. I lifted my hand and wiped her tears away, and she just smiled even bigger. This was true joy.
I took her hand from her father and swore to remember the feeling of her hand in mine, to hold on to this second of complete and utter nirvana until the day I die. I couldn't take my eyes off of her. Not when a baby started crying and the embarrassed mother rushed out of the room. Not when the preacher started talking and not even when Black whispered in my ear,
"After 10 years of stalking her, James, you finally have her." I had started to smile at that statement, till the name set in. James. She wasn't marrying me, she was marrying James, I had just taken his place. I almost let go of her perfect smooth hands, that fit into mine- Potter's- so perfectly. But the pastor just started the wedding vows.
"James and Lily have written vows to each other. This is the first time that Lilly and James have shared them with each other. Lilly, you said you would like to go first." Lilly smiled and nodded tears starting to fill her eyes yet again as Molly Longbottom handed her the paper.
"James, you are my best friend. We didn't get along in the past and I never thought that I would be standing across from you here. But at this moment, I know that I wouldn't want to be with anyone else. Do you remember that time at Hogwarts when you and the marauders turned the head boy blue because he was harassing me?" I nodded, cause I had been there. "That's when I first started not hating you. It was the first time I thought maybe you actually cared about me and weren't just being a jerk. Though You didn't so much maturity by turning him blue, I thought it showed maturity that you did it in defense for someone. And I figured maybe you weren't so bad. Thank Merlin I went with that feeling. Because of it, I'm marrying the greatest man and wizard in the world. I will always be there for you, to tell you when your wrong to praise you when your right and to keep you safe. Oh, and I love you."
The wedding goers laughed at her ending. I pretended that she was saying that to me and not to James and it made me proud. Black handed me the paper that held Potters vow. I took it and looked it over swiftly. It was exactly what he would right and anything different, im sure, someone would notice. So I read the paper.
"Lily, Lily, Lily. This is more a letter than a vow, but it's still a promise. Because whatever I write, you'll just up show me." The crowd laughed and Lily smiled. "I remember the first time that I ever you saw you. It was first year, out on platform 9 ¾. I stopped walking and Sirius ran into me. I remember thinking right then. She's mine. And though you evaded my devilish good looks and my advances, I knew that you would be mine. And here we are, ten years later. I promise to always be there, even when we are fighting- cause we will fight. I promise to always be sorry about what I say and I apologise for the mistakes I will do. I also solemnly swear that I am up to no good." Black let out a whoop, Lily smiled, the crowd laughed and I continued. "Basically what I want to say is, I won. And I got the best prize ever. And I want you to know that I am never, ever, EVER going to let you go. You are mine Lily soon-to-be Potter, and I have always been yours." The crowd actually cheered over Potters little vow and Lily was trying to control her tears.
The pastor smiled as the wind picked up. There was a collective sigh as people felt the wind, not having realized how hot they actually were. Then he spoke,
"Can we have the rings please?" Lilly got hers from Molly and I got Potters from Black and we exchanged them. "I now pronounce you man and wife. Mr. Potter you may kiss your bride."
And kiss her I did. I loved the feeling of her lips against mine. The warmth and softness of them was just overpowering and as much as I wished I could take advantage of the kiss I felt the effects of the potion wearing off. I pulled away and the pastor announced to the world. "Ladies and gentlemen it is my esteemed honor to announce James and Lily Potter."
I smiled at Lily one last time, then pulled out my wand and froze time one more time. I waited a few minutes, till the potion was completely off and went to the closet. I unlocked it and pulled the still frozen Potter out. I copied the wedding memorize and placed them deep into his mind so that it felt as it actually happened to him. Then I placed him in front of the crowd and traveled my way to the back. From heir I unfroze time and everyone carried on normally.
Lily saw me. Her face dropped then she smiled weakly at me as James swept her into his arms and kissed her. I left her a small note, I knew she would find it, and I left the wedding.
************************ Only 2 years later****************************
"No…. No… Please.." I pleaded but everyone turned a blind eye to me. I felt the air fly out of my lungs and I felt my heart constrict. No, it couldn't have been possible. "No." I spun in place and appeared in front of her home. I already saw the problems.. The whole left side of the roof was blown apart. The house was tilted sideways and down. I already felt the panic flood me.
I stepped inside the home that was now the equivalent of a shack. I gagged immediately seeing Potters dead body on the floor in front of the stairs. Then my eyes snapped up the stairs as I hear a child crying. I went up the stairs cautiously. There was a light swinging at the end of the drak hallway. I held my breath and entered the room slowly. I paused at the door and looked in.
"NO!" I fell back against the wall. Anguish crushing me in every way. The air left my lungs and I felt my world collapse. She was lying on the floor; her once lively green eyes were still open and glassy. Hair framing her face, she did not look like she was sleeping. She just looked dead. I fell to my knees, crying out and pulled her dead body up to me. "Lily!" I cried over and over again. I held her and cried while her son, the last piece of her cried with me.
I pulled myself together as best as I could and, yet, was still sobbing as I conjured a Patronus. I sent the message to Dumbledore immediately. Then I picked up the sobbing baby. I couldn't see his eyes, he had them squeezed shut. I put his head against my shoulder and attempted to soothe him as I cried myself. A longer few minutes occurred before the boy went still. I held him up and saw that he had fallen asleep. I placed him in his crib gently and brushed my hand across his little head. He already looked like his father, hopefully he would grow out of that, I thought brushing away tears with my other hand. I bent down and I kissed him forehead gently.
"I will make sure that you stay safe, for Lily's sake." I promised the boy most passionately. Then I faced the left behind body of the only woman that I have ever loved and will only ever love. I noticed there was something in her pocket. Carefully I took the single piece of paper out and carefully unfolded it. The tears came back into my eyes and I felt lost. I was reading the note that I had written to her, on her wedding day.
I will always love you. Sev.
I disapperated on the spot and fell to my knees at my home. I grabbed a pillow and clung to it as I sobbed harder than I ever had before. I cried until I fell asleep. And the last thing of that night I remember, is noticing a change. When I had sent Dumbledore a Patronus it wasn't my usual Owl. Instead it was a Doe, Lily's Patronus.