Fall of Hope
Disclaimer: All these characters belong to the great J.R.R. Tolkien.
A/N: Slightly AU. Male pregnancy, but not the happy-funny way most of these fics are. I had to deal with loss and death myself, recently, so this may be a bit depressing.
(Legolas' POV)
Gone.
I felt like a leaf in a great storm; alone and lost, with nowhere to go and no one to turn to.
Aragorn was dead.
I couldn't believe it. It couldn't be real. The only person I had ever loved couldn't be dead. Not Aragorn ... please ... no ...
I wanted to scream, wanted to cry. This was not right! He couldn't be dead. Not now. Not like this. There was still so much we hadn't done together. And there was something I had to tell him. Something that I couldn't deny any longer. But it was all meaningless now.
I couldn't cry now, though. This was not the time or the place to do so. I stood at that cliff and stared down at the river until the King ordered everyone to walk on and so I did.
I stumbled through this endless nightmare until we reached Helm's Deep. There wasn't really much to do for me. I sat down in a corner in the King's Hall, alone except for Gimli. I felt sick and my stomach hurt. Oh, Aragorn, if only you knew that new life is growing inside me. I can feel it and although it is a wonderful feeling it kills me inside that you will never know.
I got up and walked out of the Hall. I heard cheerful voices and hope rose inside my heart. Maybe ... maybe this meant the impossible. Maybe Aragorn had returned from the dead ...?
Then he walked up to me. Wounded, but still proud and wonderful in any way possible.
"You're late," I managed to say.
All I wanted to do was to throw myself into his arms and cry at his chest. He was back! He was alive. I hadn't lost him! It was as hard to believe that he was alive as it had been to accept that he was dead. He looked at me with so much love in his eyes. I wanted to hand him the Evenstar after I had told him how terrible he looked. He shook his head and closed my fingers around it.
"Keep it. Its light will shine brighter when you have it."
I swallowed. The fact that he gave away the Evenstar meant that he had cut off the connection between Arwen and him. That he was mine now. I felt warm and happy with hope. No matter how this battle or the whole war would go, I knew that Aragorn loved me.
We won. It was unbelievable, but we did. While I slowly walked back to the King's Hall I saw my kin. So many of them had found a cruel end at Helm's Deep; I felt sick again as I walked by the dead. My stomach hurt again and the whole world was spinning around and about. I fell to my knees, embracing myself. I had worried voices around me, but then darkness got a hold of me and I heard them no more.
When I woke up again I lay on a pile of blankets. My whole body hurt, especially my stomach. I put a hand on it. It felt so empty; before I had always felt my child's presence, but now there was nothing.
I looked around for someone to help, to tell me what had happened. At my side I found Mithrandir.
"Mithrandir," I whispered. "What happened? Where's my baby?"
"My dear Legolas," he began. "I fear you lost it. The thought of Aragorn's death, the battle ... that was all too much for you in this state."
I felt like the whole world was crashing down on me.
Dead ... it was dead ...
I hadn't lost Aragorn, but our child. Finally the tears came. I let them flow and did not even try to hold them back. It was all so unfair. Why was this happening to me?! WHY?!
Why did time and fate always have to destroy my hope shortly after I had gained it?
(Aragorn's POV)
Gandalf came out to me and told me to go and comfort Legolas. My legs felt heavier with every step I took. I couldn't see Legolas sad. I loved him. I had known that for a very long time, but I had also loved Arwen. Not anymore.
I opened the door to a small chamber beside the King's Great Hall and walked in.
There he was.
Not the proud and beautiful Prince of Mirkwood, but a broken shadow of what he had used to be.
I wrapped my arms around him, carefully, not to hurt him and rocked him.
"Don't cry, Legolas, I'm here," I whispered.
He didn't even look up. "I know what happened and I feel sorry. If only you had told me sooner. I would have never let you fight here."
That caught his attention and he looked up. "There was never time to tell you. There was hardly time for me at all and don't you dare act like you actually care! I know what you have to think now."
He reached into his pocket and pulled out the Evenstar. "That belongs to you, I think. Give it back to your Lady."
He pushed me away. He had gotten so weak ... I felt tears in my eyes, but ignored them.
"Legolas, that is not fair. You know that I love you and I won't take a present back nor would Arwen. Besides that I love you and not her."
"There's a difference between love and feeling responsible," he replied and curled up. "Leave me alone."
I got up and walked out, but I had left my heart behind.
Should I continue or not ...?
Disclaimer: All these characters belong to the great J.R.R. Tolkien.
A/N: Slightly AU. Male pregnancy, but not the happy-funny way most of these fics are. I had to deal with loss and death myself, recently, so this may be a bit depressing.
(Legolas' POV)
Gone.
I felt like a leaf in a great storm; alone and lost, with nowhere to go and no one to turn to.
Aragorn was dead.
I couldn't believe it. It couldn't be real. The only person I had ever loved couldn't be dead. Not Aragorn ... please ... no ...
I wanted to scream, wanted to cry. This was not right! He couldn't be dead. Not now. Not like this. There was still so much we hadn't done together. And there was something I had to tell him. Something that I couldn't deny any longer. But it was all meaningless now.
I couldn't cry now, though. This was not the time or the place to do so. I stood at that cliff and stared down at the river until the King ordered everyone to walk on and so I did.
I stumbled through this endless nightmare until we reached Helm's Deep. There wasn't really much to do for me. I sat down in a corner in the King's Hall, alone except for Gimli. I felt sick and my stomach hurt. Oh, Aragorn, if only you knew that new life is growing inside me. I can feel it and although it is a wonderful feeling it kills me inside that you will never know.
I got up and walked out of the Hall. I heard cheerful voices and hope rose inside my heart. Maybe ... maybe this meant the impossible. Maybe Aragorn had returned from the dead ...?
Then he walked up to me. Wounded, but still proud and wonderful in any way possible.
"You're late," I managed to say.
All I wanted to do was to throw myself into his arms and cry at his chest. He was back! He was alive. I hadn't lost him! It was as hard to believe that he was alive as it had been to accept that he was dead. He looked at me with so much love in his eyes. I wanted to hand him the Evenstar after I had told him how terrible he looked. He shook his head and closed my fingers around it.
"Keep it. Its light will shine brighter when you have it."
I swallowed. The fact that he gave away the Evenstar meant that he had cut off the connection between Arwen and him. That he was mine now. I felt warm and happy with hope. No matter how this battle or the whole war would go, I knew that Aragorn loved me.
We won. It was unbelievable, but we did. While I slowly walked back to the King's Hall I saw my kin. So many of them had found a cruel end at Helm's Deep; I felt sick again as I walked by the dead. My stomach hurt again and the whole world was spinning around and about. I fell to my knees, embracing myself. I had worried voices around me, but then darkness got a hold of me and I heard them no more.
When I woke up again I lay on a pile of blankets. My whole body hurt, especially my stomach. I put a hand on it. It felt so empty; before I had always felt my child's presence, but now there was nothing.
I looked around for someone to help, to tell me what had happened. At my side I found Mithrandir.
"Mithrandir," I whispered. "What happened? Where's my baby?"
"My dear Legolas," he began. "I fear you lost it. The thought of Aragorn's death, the battle ... that was all too much for you in this state."
I felt like the whole world was crashing down on me.
Dead ... it was dead ...
I hadn't lost Aragorn, but our child. Finally the tears came. I let them flow and did not even try to hold them back. It was all so unfair. Why was this happening to me?! WHY?!
Why did time and fate always have to destroy my hope shortly after I had gained it?
(Aragorn's POV)
Gandalf came out to me and told me to go and comfort Legolas. My legs felt heavier with every step I took. I couldn't see Legolas sad. I loved him. I had known that for a very long time, but I had also loved Arwen. Not anymore.
I opened the door to a small chamber beside the King's Great Hall and walked in.
There he was.
Not the proud and beautiful Prince of Mirkwood, but a broken shadow of what he had used to be.
I wrapped my arms around him, carefully, not to hurt him and rocked him.
"Don't cry, Legolas, I'm here," I whispered.
He didn't even look up. "I know what happened and I feel sorry. If only you had told me sooner. I would have never let you fight here."
That caught his attention and he looked up. "There was never time to tell you. There was hardly time for me at all and don't you dare act like you actually care! I know what you have to think now."
He reached into his pocket and pulled out the Evenstar. "That belongs to you, I think. Give it back to your Lady."
He pushed me away. He had gotten so weak ... I felt tears in my eyes, but ignored them.
"Legolas, that is not fair. You know that I love you and I won't take a present back nor would Arwen. Besides that I love you and not her."
"There's a difference between love and feeling responsible," he replied and curled up. "Leave me alone."
I got up and walked out, but I had left my heart behind.
Should I continue or not ...?