Juvia P.O.V

I had been walking for hours not caring where I was going I just kept walking. It was raining but I wasn't causing it I guess I hadn't hit rock bottom yet. As I walked I could still hear his words and with every single syllable it felt like a knife was digging itself into my heart.

"I could never love Juvia."

Those were the words that my beloved Gray uttered to Erza as they stood over the guild hall balcony. They didn't know I was there but it didn't matter because at that moment all reasons for me to exist were gone. Once I was loved but my past was too much for him that only made the rain worse. Throughout my entire existence I wondered why I was even worth one ounce of thought. If the only purpose of my creation was to be ridiculed, unloved, and unwanted. I had no purpose I was a shell of human wandering alone as fate had already determined. My anger and my loneliness fueled, my power it was the one that made people acknowledge the fact that I was even breathing. A worthless creation that is what I defined myself as nothing more than a weapon against happiness. My war against Fairytail was never fueled by the anger my guild had against it. The war was between me and Fairytail between me and happiness something that came so easily to Fairytail but not to me. I envied them for it and despised them for having something I couldn't get or understand.

Why did it give them such strength?

Why couldn't Juvia have it?

Why did the world hate Juvia?

From there I decided if the world's purpose was to taunt my existence then I would destroy every ounce of happiness that taunted me. At least that was the goal till I meet a mage with a magic much like my own. That was the day I meet Gray Fullbuster. I could see it the pain in his eyes much like my own he was different life too had treated him poorly. I was befuddled by the pain that lingered in his face but I could also see happiness. He had experienced both and again I was enraged, why did everyone have some sort of happiness within them. Everyone except me! During the fight I saw the power that happiness had given him the bonds of love and friendship that drove him. I felt myself grow sad instead of angry because his existence had meaning if he were to die then people would cry. I wondered how that felt for people to cry for you to show that you hold some sort of meaning in their hearts. I doubted that I would ever get a chance to experience that feeling as I fell off the side of the floating guild. I closed my eyes as I fell there was no point of me feeling sad about death. Death was kinder then life at this point it seemed warmer. It was ready to accept me with open arms when the life had closed its arms to me. I was ready.

I blacked out but I knew was alive because I still felt pain I still felt the rain on my skin. As I opened my eyes Gray was standing in front me and I realized he had saved me. There was a look in his eyes as he watched me he could see something in me something worth saving. What had he seen in my meaningless existence that could possibly be worth saving? I still don't know the answer till this day I have yet to answer it. However on the day seeing him smile and laugh as though I was a friend I felt it this feeling I had never experienced before. It was warmth. All the tears, all the anguish, and all the anger didn't seem unbearable anymore. My past it seemed all worth it to get to this point where I could smile. I think that's what you call it. I was happy it felt so intoxicating to feel happy like I was drugged sending me into euphoria. It was sheer bliss and for the first time that I could recall the clouds above my head thinned and that when I saw the sun. My eyes cried once more but from happiness this time as the sun bathed me in warm rays of yellow. This was day I fell in love with Gray Fullbuster but it was also the day I learned happiness came with a price. He had brought me happiness he had seen something in me that was worth saving when I couldn't. Yet he only looked at me with distain and disgust like the others in my past even he couldn't bring himself to love the sad rain woman. No amount of kindness he held could ever see past my gloom. Now I wished I had never know happiness because the pain was worse it didn't even compare to the pain I felt when all I knew was sadness and despair. The price was heavy for such a drug because that's what happiness was a drug. At this point I stopped walking because I felt oddly weak. I looked at the water that was falling onto my skin it was quickly evaporating off and as I felt my forehead I realized I had a fever. It was already too high and I would never make it back to the guild in time. My head got cloudy and I crumpled to ground shivering as the rain kept pouring down. I looked up at the sky and once again I closed my eyes I ready to die. If the one person who saw any worth in saving me couldn't even look at me without distain what was the point in continuing my existence? Once I again I blacked out but again I was still alive painfully so.

Why did the world wish to watch me wallow in agony?!

As I turned over I realized I was in a bed without opening my eyes I moved around a bit it was so big. I realized I had been covered I gripped the blankets they smelled like warm spices and oak they were so soft and warm. I curled up cuddling the blanket and then realized that several of my layers had been taken off. I was down to just a tank top and jeans I bolted up clutching the blanket I felt so exposed! As I sat up I saw that I was in a cabin there were some lanterns hanging on the wall opposite me. They weren't too bright so it was dim as I looked around there wasn't a lot of furniture. Piles of comics, plates and dirty glasses everywhere this person was clearly not tidy. As I looked to the right there was a shirtless man bending down poking some firewood that was lit. Above the firewood I noticed there was a steaming pot that was cooking on the stove whatever it was it smelled pretty good. I then noticed the man was stroking the firewood with his hand and he didn't seem bothered. As he straightened up I could see long locks of lush pink hair.

"Natsu?" I asked slightly shocked.

"Oh you're awake." He said turning around giving me a smile.

He stood up and busied himself over the stove as I looked him over. No one had seen Natsu in months since he had gotten put on an S-class ranked mission. He didn't look very different I did notice a couple of scars on his lean back but nothing too severe. His hair was a bit longer but it suited him.

"When did you come back Natsu-san?" I asked.

"Today actually that's when I found you passed out on the road you had a pretty bad fever." He replied in a warm tone as he walked over to me.

"Here eat this its good." He continued as he handed me a bowl before sitting at the edge of the bed.

I stirred the bowl of soup over it was a white and creamy liquid with bits of carrots and potatoes it smelled quite good.

"Juvia didn't know you could cook Natsu." I said setting the bowl of soup on my lap.

"Igneel taught me how to make the stew. When I gave you the medicine in some soup I figured you would want something better tasting after." Natsu said chuckling nervously.

I gave him a small smile and thanked before taking in an entire spoonful. The creamy liquid was rich and filled with herbs and spices that danced in my mouth. The bits of potatoes and carrots were packed with flavor all of it came together perfectly. It didn't take long for me to drink the entire thing and I felt much better afterwards as the warm liquid sat comfortable in my stomach.

"Did you like it?" Natsu asked.

"Mhmm you're a really good cook." I said resting my back against the headboard.

"Thanks." Natsu said chuckling as he took the dish to the sink.

As he washed the dished I grew sad again remembering why I was here in the first place. I felt my heart sink again and hugged my knees as I sat there.

"If you don't mind me asking why were you outside in the first place Juvia?" Natsu asked as he washed the dishes.

"Oh Juvia was just walking." I replied numbly.

"In the rain?" Natsu asked turning around and arching his eyebrow questioningly.

I felt myself blush at how stupid that sounded but at the time I just needed to walk I needed to get away.

"Yeah." I said stupidly.

"Well you are a water mage but I am surprised you got sick. Was there anything bothering you?" he asked turning back to the dishes.

I didn't answer I tightened my grip around my knees and nodded my head in response.

"Gray?" Natsu asked his voice a bit harsher.

I nodded again this time Natsu dropped the plate he had been washing into the sink causing it crack. He stood there for a moment he seemed angry I didn't understand why but he seemed so enraged. But after a moment his shoulders relaxed and he put the dishes he had been washing on the counter to dry. He then strode toward me before lying on the bed with his arms crossed under his head as he stared at the celling.

"What did he do now?" Natsu asked sounding slightly annoyed.

I couldn't answer not right now it was still too painful so I hugged my knees tighter and bowed my head. Natsu looked over at me and then bowed his head so that his bangs covered his eyes and only his lips were visible.

"You know Juvia….I know you're in love with Gray but maybe you should take a break focus on you." He said softly.

"F-focus on Juvia?" I repeated.

"Yeah take some time off be happy I like seeing you when you're happy." He said bowing his head more as he sat up.

I gasped a bit but I also felt myself blush as I lifted my head I then smiled at Natsu and nodded my head. He smiled back me and this is when I became painfully aware that I didn't have all my clothes on.

"Umm Natsu-san where are the rest of Juvia's clothes?" I asked.

"Oh! The coat and the rest of your layers are folded over there. Sorry it just that I needed to take off some of the layers or else your fever wouldn't have broken so quickly." He said apologetically.

"It's ok but Juvia-san doesn't like being so exposed." I said moving my legs over the side of the bed.

"Is that the only reason?" Natsu asked.

Truthfully that wasn't the only reason I never really felt comfortable without my layers only at parties did I wear skimpy dresses. But I couldn't say that to Natsu so I just stuttered but he didn't seem to mind much.

"Wait here." He said.

I sat there nervously twiddling my thumbs till I hear a horrible scrapping noise as Natsu dragged over something draped in cloth. He then pulled the cloth off to reveal a full sized oval shaped mirror.

"I think you look beautiful either way." He said titling the mirror toward me.

I stood up and admired myself for a bit without all the layers all the insecurities I was worried about seemed to be nonexistent now. I felt oddly free I couldn't help but laugh I still felt a bit self-conscious but hearing Natsu call me beautiful made me truly feel that way.

"See." He said laughing as I spun around.

"Juvia likes this but it will take time for Juvia to get use to it." I responded.

Natsu chuckled in response and handed me the rest of my clothes we then waited outside till the rain stopped. Once it did I left oddly enough I was smiling.

l