Disclaimer: Death Note and its characters don't belong to me.
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The
Last Seventy-Two HoursHe had been sitting in the
investigation hideout for some days. Depressing it was, but he always
fine with it. Day and night he savoured his entire stash of sweet
foods, and the ringing silence that reminded him of his
loneliness.If it weren't for Deathnote, we
wouldn't have met.There wasn't much time left
for him to appreciate the world.'Why did you write
your name on it? Why make such a risky and wild bet?' the older
man's words rang in his head.I couldn't have
convinced you otherwise.As he looked at his stash,
he decided that it was time for a refill. Getting up, he grabbed his
wallet before sauntering out of the hideout, for once without the
fear of being seen, but with the burden of an invisible pending
guillotine over his head.And there he was,
unrecognized as the true hero of Japan, or even potentially the whole
world, as he strolled through the crowd with a lollipop in his mouth.
There was something strangely surreal about where he was now, and
what he was doing—shouldn't he be doing something purposeful,
something big, something fulfilling?Or something
that'd make the most meaningful closure to the final chapter of his
life?No. Instead, he was in some random convenience
storel stocking up on his candies.And with that big
bag of candies, he sat alone in a restaurant, having a tea break.
When he asked for eight packets of sugar, the waitress stared at him
for a short moment before obliging, and when she returned, he offered
her a lollipop that she politely rejected. For a while he gazed at
her, as if a little dejected, but he smiled meekly and looked out of
the window, leaving the girl feeling a little apologetic somehow. Not
that he cared—all that mattered wasn't there anymore.He
stared out into the streets, observing people and their every action,
meanwhile letting thoughts swim.'It's not like you
to give up so easily, L!'When we teamed up, I
really liked the chemistry between us.A brother
and sister walked past. He was ruffling his little sister's hair,
and the image was oddly bittersweet.…How fragile
this seems.As he took a sip of his cloyingly sweet
tea, he felt some kind of irony. Tea was bitter, but he'd drowned
it in sweetness. Still, there was a bitter aftertaste, which he
wasn't sure whether it was purely psychological.'We
can do this!'Funny how fate works. You really
aren't a bad person…He smiled at the thought
of how it went when everyone worked towards a common goal.You
are smart.Before he knew it, he'd finished the
cup of tea. Sighing, he got up and grabbed his bag of candies. Then
he approached the cashier and pulled out a bunch of notes. Without
quite counting, he placed an amount on the payment tray, and was
about to walk off when the cashier called out to him."You're
short of a little…" she noted hesitantly. As she studied him, she
noticed how he seemed to be a little dazed. Smiling weirdly to
himself, he lowered his head slightly in apology as he pulled out
another note and placed it on the tray. Just as he attempted to walk
off, she called again, "Sir! Your change!"
"Keep the change," he replied nonchalantly as he headed out of the shop, leaving the cashier bewildered.It's not like I have any use for the extra cash.All too soon, he was back on the streets, joining the sea of people.The time we spent working together was really short.As he walked, he heard the sound of a crying little girl, a pathetic wail that penetrated his thoughts. Turning to see, he saw a tiny figure, probably not more than eight years of age. Then he squatted down in front of her, looking up at her. Although she saw him, she didn't stop crying, though it progressed to a sob. Once again putting up a meek smile, he pulled out the same lollipop he offered the waitress and held it up to her.Children were an innocent bunch.Receiving the lollipop, the little girl managed a small smile."Lost your way?" he asked."I can't find Mummy…" the girl replied, nearly losing her smile."Let me help you," he offered."Mummy says not to go with strangers…" the girl said hesitantly."Mummy also said not to accept things from strangers," he replied jokingly as his smile grew a little wider. As if understanding him, the little girl grinned, and when he stretched his hand out, she took his hand. Holding her hand, he walked through the streets with the little girl. That moment felt strangely heartwarming.Eventually, the girl's mother appeared, and the little girl released his hand, sprinting towards her mother. At the brief moment when she released her hand, he felt a little sentimental, like something slipping through his fingers and leaving him…Like their lives lost in the timeline I was racing against…And I'm the last in line, I guess."Thank you Big Brother!" the little girl called out, waking him from his solemn thoughts. Again, he managed another wide smile as he lowered his head slightly, acknowledging the girl's mother, who did the same action."Thank you so much," she said, as she bowed once more before she took her daughter's hand and walked off. The little girl turned to take a last look of him before she went off, with the lollipop in her hand.Standing there for a while with his bag of candies, he rolled the lollipop in his mouth, and by now it was reduced to a stick. Then he dumped the stick and started on his second one. After the girl and her mother were out of sight, he turned to the direction he came from and moved on, to his empty investigation hideout.There was something sad about the hideout at night. He dimmed the lights, and then put away his 'grocery'. Deciding that he was too unmotivated to even want to have a proper meal, he picked a packet of snacks from his new stock—Calbee brand chips, original flavour.Squatting on the sofa, he started eating his chips.Wataru's not around.He was his only kin.I hope you went to heaven…The whole subject of Deathnote, of the Shinigami, of Kira… It happened. It was so real.So real, it hurt.But it was probably the most bizarre souvenir he could take back to the netherworld.If Deathnote never appeared, you wouldn't have become Kira, and I wouldn't have been called in to pry you out. We'd never have this game, this battle of wits, and I'd never have felt this adrenaline rush. We worked so hard—so hard. I know it was hard for you. It was hard for me too. And if I weren't so close to getting you, you wouldn't have done what you did—team up with me. I don't know what went on; I can only guess. But during the teamwork when you gave your all to crack the case, you were the sincerest.You were my buddy.And when we caught that Kira, things just went bad all over again. You caught me off guard, and I resorted to this. If you asked me now, what I felt of that, I can only say perhaps, I wished it never happened.During that 'spectacular', I was truly chilled to the bones. I know I was calm then as I watched you in your frenzy. But at that moment, there was nothing that could have salvaged the situation; you were obsessed, or maybe possessed—but perhaps at the same time, we were all awake, more awake than anytime of our lives. And there and then he killed you, and you drew your last breath, not without your last words. Days after, I wished you never said what you did. It left a bitter taste to all that'd happened. It left everything with room for regret, and nothing but regret.Perhaps if you asked me again, whether I regretted this whole thing, I'd say I never had the choice, as do many times in life. Like I said, if it never happened, I'd never have known you.So now, you might wonder, why did I not extend the date to the cessation to my existence?I'll let you in on it.There's no point in staying alive anymore.If I lost the wager, you would live to solve the mystery; I wouldn't deserve to live by then.So what do I think now, now that I've won the wager? Did I expect not to win?No, it's not that.It's just that…there's no point in winning anymore.Wataru's dead.And so are you.If anything, I'd rather have died and put an end to my misery……not to live to count my remaining days, contradicting myself over and over whether I wished it happened, and spend the rest of my days regretting all that'd happened and burning a void into my soul.The bag of chips was empty. He put it away, and closed his eyes.Two more days to a new journey in the other world.Such a long time.I wonder what's the world you're currently in like?Or…is there anything left of you?…If we ever get to meet in whatever world that's supposed to be……I'd ask if we could be friends this time.
