AN: So I will probably never ever, ever, ever write another Snily fic - my usual ship is Snamione, but obviously due to the setting that's not going to happen (de-aging/time-travelly sort of fics aren't my cup of tea). In fact this wasn't even supposed to be a romance anyway, I just got the inspiration for the first scene as a bit of comedy and then it kind of continued from there. Couldn't resist the opportunity for a happy ending for Severus I guess :)

Black and Blue

Yet again, Severus Snape found himself dangling in mid-air by the ankle, robes tumbling over his head to reveal his greying underpants to the entire school. He was currently trying to think of the most painful way imaginable that he could have his revenge on the Marauders, the whole lot of them! Once he was back on terra firma that is...

"Alright, who wants to see me take off Snivelly's pants?" Sirius Black laughed, waving a wand tauntingly in the direction of his victim, who seemed to be trying ineffectively to wriggle free from the invisible grasp. Sirius waggled his wand about a bit more to shake the boy from side to side, causing the Slytherin to utter an anguished grunt; as well as several muttered threats.

"Muggle-fucking troll shit, Snape, you floppy-wanded Dementor-buggerer!" the Gryffindor teen jeered at his helpless adversary. James Potter roared with laughter at his best friend's rather creative curses.

"MISTER BLACK!" Professor McGonagall's outraged tones cut across the courtyard.

A sudden hush descended, as everybody turned to observe what would most likely be a spectacular public dressing-down. Sirius gave a nonchalant flick of his wand wrist, and Snape collapsed upside down in a dishevelled heap on the hard ground below.

The Deputy Headmistress continued her chastisement, her expression thunderous.

"Never, in all my years, have I heard such disgraceful language! Especially a student from my own House! And bullying Mr Snape again...?! Detention, Black! In my office! For a week! And do not encourage him Mr Potter: you two boys are as bad as each other! Twenty points from Gryffindor - each!"

McGonagall turned abruptly and marched off back into the castle, still fuming.

Slowly the background hubbub of chatter returned, as the other students realised the show was over.

Sirius shrugged at James, flipping a renegade lock of wavy hair off his face, looking every inch the aristocratic playboy. He threw a cocky wink at a nearby Sixth-Year Ravenclaw girl, who blushed and fluttered her eyelashes at him. "Whatever. It was worth it!"

James snorted, and clapped him on the back. "Hah! 'Troll shit'... nice one Padfoot!"

Once Severus had sorted out his robes and scrambled to his feet, he spotted the concerned-looking face of his best friend Lily Evans as she pushed her way to the front of the crowd that had gathered to watch the ritual humiliation. She came over and placed her hand on the back of his arm in reassurance. So close, he could see the repressed tears that made her bewitching green eyes glitter like emeralds; he glanced away, before her display of emotion made him cry too. He'd had enough embarrassment for one afternoon...

"Are you okay Sev?" Lily linked her arm through his; not wanting to make her friend look even more of a weakling than he'd already endured at the hands of her fellow Gryffindors.

"Sorry Black's such an arse - I did ask Remus if he can reign him in a bit, but I'm afraid Lupin's a bit of a wet-blanket when it comes to him and Potter. He won't do anything that might encourage them to stop hanging out with him, the coward. Oh! Where's your wand...?"

Snape's gaze darted across the courtyard floor, and his eyes quickly alighted on the ornate ebony handle that had rolled under a nearby bench when he had first been taken by surprise and assaulted moments ago. He pointed sullenly towards it; Lily raised her own and Summoned it towards them.

"Accio wand! There you go Sev, I hope it's not broken?"

The wizard ran his sinuous fingers along the length in cursory inspection, feigning lack of concern.

"Nah, looks fine Lil'." Severus didn't sound particularly overjoyed at this bit of good-fortune though. "Just as well," he added morosely, "My mam can't afford to get me a new one if I lose it..."

Seeing that her friend was only adding to his woes by thinking about the state of his family's finances, Lily leant her head onto his shoulders affectionately as they walked across the yard together.

"Never mind: it's not like people haven't seen your pants before Sev, I'm sure no-one cares." She glanced at him to make sure he'd taken her joke in the spirit that she'd intended, and shot him a wink. "Besides," she chanced, "if they were anything like me, they rather enjoyed the view! Come on, let's go down to the Forbidden Forest..."

Severus shot her a slightly baffled look, unsure how to interpret her comment. He blushed, the sudden colour obvious on his normally sallow face. The pair walked in silence for a bit; across the bridge that led away from the school, and down towards the shadowy woods. Lily lay down on the ground with her legs outstretched and patted the grass next to her, inviting him to sit.

"Bloody Black and his mates!" Severus spoke for the first time since they'd left the castle. "I'm going to Hex the lot of them one day..."

"Oh Sev," Lily smiled at him, "Don't lower yourself to their level, honestly! None of them are half the wizard that you are; I bet you Potter couldn't find his broomstick with both hands..."

Snape barked out a laugh, grinning at her through a wayward curtain of long black hair. Lily brought her hand up to his face and brushed it away tenderly, green eyes connecting with black for a brief moment.

"Cheers Lily. You always know what to say to make me feel better." He stretched out languidly on the grass, leaning back and surveying their surroundings. "It's nice out here you know; quiet... No bloody Gryffindors- well, except present company of course..." his lip curled at the corner, an expression that looked slightly odd on his face, which someone who didn't know him very well might have mistaken for being unfriendly. Lily rested a hand lightly on his knee.

"Yes, I like the quiet here too. Actually..." she hesitated. "I thought we'd come down here because it's quiet." He raised an eyebrow at her, confused. Her hand moved over his leg slightly, and his eyes went wide. "Lil'...?!"

"Shhh Sev..." she raised her free hand and placed a finger to his pale lips. "You really are a broom-head you know?" He couldn't bring himself to look at her.

"Lil', what...? Wait, no... Lil', I... There's no need to-... I don't need your pity!"

The redhead withdrew her hand from his leg all of a sudden, and sat back to regard him seriously.

"Severus Snape, how long have you known me? You think I'd only be interested in you because I feel sorry for you?! You daft sod." She leaned in and gave him a quick peck on the cheek and sat back again. "I thought we were friends, I can't believe you haven't realised that I like you!"

"You... like me?" Now it was her turn to blush.

"Severus - you're a brilliant wizard, but Merlin's Beard you can be dense sometimes! Yes, Sev. You're funny, smart... What witch wouldn't see the appeal in a tall, dark and handsome guy like you?"

"Handsome?!" He knew full-well his appearance was... slightly unorthodox... and glared at her sceptically. "You think I'm handsome?"

Lily laughed lightly. "Eye of the beholder and all that, I guess Sev; now stop trawling for compliments!" She took hold of his pale hand and squeezed it gently. Snape cautiously drew them both up to his face and pressed a gentle kiss to the back of hers, his eyes locked on hers the whole time, watching her reaction tentatively. She giggled at him, not unkindly.

"Very suave. Ever the gentleman Sevvy! You're a good man, you know that? Far too good for the likes of Avery and Mulciber." She scrunched her nose up in distaste. "You should tell those idiots to get lost you know, they've all got Nifflers for brains."

"Yeah I know." Snape looked suddenly sheepish again. "I thought that if Potter and his friends knew I hung out with them that they'd go pick on someone else instead, but obviously not..." He offered her a small shrug, still clasping her hand in his lap and hoping fervently he wasn't sweating all over her too much.

"They don't half have some horrible ideas you know Lil'. I'm not a mad fan of Muggles - my dad sort of put me off I suppose - but some of the things they say..." He trailed off. "They're okay sometimes though." He beamed at her, a rare smile from ear to ear. "Muggles I mean! Without Muggles, I'd never have met you."

"You say the sweetest things Sev." Lily stroked the back of his hand with her thumb absentmindedly. "Now how about you quit being all mopey and cheer up a little?"

Flashing him one of her breathtakingly beautiful smiles, she leaned in towards him slowly, giving the nervous young wizard the chance to retreat if he were still reluctant. This time however, he reciprocated; leaning in and tentatively pressing his lips to hers, bringing his free hand up to cup her face gently. Lily made a contented noise into his mouth as they embraced. "Mmm..." She broke off the kiss and smiled at him. "Do you have any idea how long I've been waiting for you to do that?"

She kissed him again, harder this time; making up for so many lost opportunities. Her hands were tangled in his hair; he didn't even care if it was greasy for once. She felt amazing - more intoxicating than any potion.

Snape tried to ignore the butterflies that were currently doing the samba in his belly. "Oh god, Lily..." They both reclined fully onto the mossy ground, wrapping their arms around each other. His pitch-dark eyes, which were closed in ecstasy, flew open in surprise as he felt her tongue pressing against his lips. She was looking at him with a passion in her vivid green eyes that he'd never seen before. With no clue as to whether he was doing it 'right' or not, he parted his lips and tried to copy what Lily was doing.

"Mmm, Sev." Her moans of delight were doing strange, wonderful things to him. While he'd always adored her from a distance, delighted at merely being in her company, having her return his affections had heightened all his senses.

Pausing momentarily, Lily pressed her forehead to his; they were both breathing heavily. Severus peppered her face with tiny kisses, nose nuzzling softly against her cheeks all the while.

She placed a hand firmly on his chest, holding him in place on the ground, and half-sat up. He frowned at her, unsure if he had done something to upset her. "Lil'?"

Flashing him a reassuring smile, Lily Evans swung a leg over his body to straddle him. Her hands traced swirling paths across his chest, brushing his collarbone and sliding under the edge of his robes. She bent over to kiss him again, pressing her body against his as she lay on top. Suddenly he could feel a pull at his waist, and a single black eye shot open in a flash to fix her with a questioning stare.

"Lily...?!" She was fumbling about with his belt, and gave him an endearingly unapologetic look.

"You know, your pants didn't leave much to the imagination earlier Severus. I'd suggest that you get yourself some new ones, but... well, frankly; I rather liked what I saw!"

Suddenly feeling very hot under the collar indeed, Snape shifted uncomfortably underneath her, hoping she had no idea the effect she was having on him. Then she moved too - grinding her hips against him in a way that let him know in no uncertain terms that she knew perfectly well what she was doing; both to him, and in general.

Wondering how in Merlin's name his day had managed to take such a dramatic turn for the better in such a short space of time, Snape ran his hands up Lily's body; following her curves and caressing her breasts. Pushing himself upright to passionately kiss her neck, Lily remained in his lap, and let out another moan of pleasure as his warm breath send shivers down her spine, his hair tickling her skin.

Having now successfully undone Severus' belt, Lily tugged it free from his trousers, triumphantly brandishing it like a whip, with a decidedly wicked look in her eyes; before flinging it over her shoulder and returning her attention to divesting him of some more of his clothing. "Now - let's see those pants of yours again..."

Undoing the buttons on his fly, taking what felt like forever, she slipped her hand under the fabric and caressed him firmly but sensuously through his underwear. Now it was Snape's turn to let out a low moan as he threw his head back and let himself recline fully onto the grass again, unable to do much else other than submit to her ministrations.

"Well, it seems I wasn't the only one that's been looking forward to doing this?!" Lily was still running her hands wildly over his body, and Snape wasn't sure how much more he could take. He belatedly remembered that he'd recently been reading up on the rather obscure skill of Occlumency, and wondered if using a similar technique to clear his mind might be helpful in his current situation, but try as he might he couldn't manage to think about nothing at all, while she was continuing to be so damned distracting. Deciding for once in his life that he would just have to relinquish his usual self-control and hang the consequences, he grabbed her close to his chest all of a sudden and rolled carefully so that he was now above her. Lily looked up at him with a mixture of surprise and delight, craning her neck up to plant a kiss on the end of his nose.

"Love you Sev."

The wizard's face belied the struggle he had to express himself for a moment, but then Snape inhaled deeply, brushed a stray lock of straggly black hair out of his eyes and met her gaze evenly. "I love you too Lily." He seemed suddenly very sure of himself; as if any internal conflict had resolved itself in an instant, "I always have."

On the hilltop near the school, Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs stood, watching the two lovers as they embraced, before turning away awkwardly when things started to get a little too heated, and they all trudged back towards the castle.

"Sorry Prongs, mate." Sirius shot James a sympathetic look. "I know you had your eye on Evans recently... Never mind though. Plenty more witches in the sea you know?! There's a cracking Seventh-Year girl in Hufflepuff I met in the Hog's Head the other week - I can put in a good word for you?"