Sometimes all you can feel is jealousy. Sometimes all you can feel is love. Sometimes . . . you don't know what you feel. Your emotions destroy you, eat you from the inside out.

When you hear that he's hanging with some other girl. When you hear that his friends are making fun of him because of you.

When his arm brushes yours. When he smiles at you. When he glances at you out of the corner of his eye. When he laughs with you.

You're so stupid, you tell yourself. How could he actually fall for you? But when you see him, you forget all about it. You can't help but feel your eyes drawn to him.

Jealousy: What you feel when he spends time with anyone but you.

Hatred: What you feel towards those he spends time with.

Separation: What you feel when you're away from him for more than a minute.

Arousal: What you feel when he sits down next to you, when he touches you, when he glances your way.

Giddiness: What you feel when he comes up and talks to you of his own accord.

Hurt: What you feel when you find out he's playing you for a fool.

Love: You know you're feeling it when you experience all of the above.

But why does it hurt? Why does it resound deep within for weeks after? Why can't you simply just brush it off and be done?

Why does he affect you so much? Why does he refuse to leave your brain? Why is his name always on the tip of your tongue?

Why am I writing this?

An excerpt from the diary of Sinead Starling

This is my way of doing anything but working on anything else that I should be working on . . . you know them...

Awakening.

Die Twisted Affare

Earthfall.

-insert any other unfinished fic here-

Anyway... this was really short so thanks for reading...

I actually wrote this back in June about someone I liked. I was re-reading my diary and I was like OMG SINEAD WOULD TOTALLY BE FEELING THIS...

So I removed some names, made it more general, cut out some personal stuff and here you are.

A heartbreaking angst love ... thing

god I don't know why i'm a writer I can't even think of a word to describe what I mean...

Ok, goodbye!

-Addict