Emily walked down the steps of the motel. She needed to get some fresh air. They were still in upstate New York, due to fly back to DC the next day. Emily was still extremely sore from the accident and thought the fresh air and a stretch would help. Sleep definitely wasn't on the cards for tonight. She made it to the front lawn in front of the motel and wandered around the garden. She kicked off her sneakers and felt the grass between her toes. She didn't want to close her eyes, knowing what was waiting on the other side. Bunting. His face. His face as Shrader choked him to death. Emily just stood on the lawn, thinking. She looked up at the sky and saw the stars. With the lights on the street and in the nearby carpark they weren't as visible, but she knew they were still there and it calmed her mind.
Hotch couldn't sleep. After everything the team had already gone through in the past year, this was one more nightmare to deal with. Hotch was just starting to get back into the rhythm of the job when JJ had burst into the conference room saying that Emily was in the hospital following a car accident. Hotch felt that strange case of déjà vu, where the woman he had grown to love was in trouble. In that moment he'd wanted to run out of the station and get to the hospital. He had to know she was alright. But he couldn't. Not only did he have a job to do, but he couldn't express how he felt about her, how he was so grateful for the support she'd given him during the past months, following Hayley's death, how he'd been falling in love with her long before Foyet was even an issue. He couldn't tell her. So he was stuck, in limbo, knowing he would probably never love someone like he loved Emily.
He walked out his door and onto the front stoop. He looked up at the sky, finding a few stars. Then he heard her cough. Without looking he knew who it was. He edged forward and sure enough, Emily. He watched her from a distance, knowing he could get caught, but unable to look away. She was lying on the grass, looking up at the sky. He quietly walked over and sat down next to her. She looked up and smiled. "Hey," she whispered. He didn't answer. He just lay down next to her and let out a sigh. They didn't need words, they just lay there, watching the sky.
After what felt like forever, Hotch whispered, "How you feeling?" Emily let out a breath. "Guilty," she answered quietly. Hotch sat up slightly, leaning on his elbows, and frowned at her. "Why?" he asked, his brow furrowed. Emily wouldn't look at him, and kept her eyes on the sky. She shrugged. "I didn't do enough," she answered. Hotch wasn't sure what to say. He thought she was the optimist. She had told him so many times that what had happened to his family wasn't his fault. And now here she is, blaming herself for what happened to Bunting.
Hotch took a deep breath and lay back down. "Prentiss, you did what you could. You did more than that. You scrambled out of a wrecked car to shoot down a killer. You don't need to feel guilty for making it out alive," he said. Emily felt a tear run down her cheek and she reached up to wipe it away. "Pren…" Hotch stopped himself. How could he tell her how he felt if he couldn't even call her by her given name? "Emi…" Hotch was cut off when he heard footsteps.
He turned his head and watched Rossi walk over to them. He stood over them and shook his head. "I hear noises and think it's an unsub and it turns out it's you two. What are you doing up so late?" Emily sat up on her elbows. "Sorry. Just star-gazing," she said. Rossi smiled and looked up. "Alright. Well, I'll leave you to it," he said, before he turned and walked back to his room.
Hotch sighed and sat up. He looked over at Emily and frowned. He stood up, still silent, and held out his hand. She smiled sadly as she took it and he pulled her up. They were standing so close she could swear she heard his heart beating. He was still holding her hand when he cleared his throat. She let go and wrapped her arms around his neck and hugged him tight. She felt him relax and wrap his arms around her waist. "Thanks Hotch. Thanks for everything," she whispered. Hotch frowned as he smelt her hair. "Prentiss, you're a valuable member of this team. I'm grateful for everything you contribute and I hope you know how much…" Hotch cleared his throat, "How much you mean to all of us."
Emily stood back and nodded, furrowing her brow. She could've sworn he felt the same way about her but… maybe not. And if he wasn't going to tell her now, when he had almost lost her, then he would probably never take that chance. Emily forced a smile. "I'm gonna try get some sleep. I'll see you in the morning sir," she said, looking at her feet.
Hotch's heart sank as she called him "sir." Maybe he was kidding himself. Maybe she was just being nice when she dropped him home after Foyet, when she helped him go Christmas shopping for Jack, when she babysat Jack so he could meet with Strauss. She'd been on the team for years and was always doing kind deeds for everyone so maybe she was just being a friend, nothing more and nothing less. Hotch nodded, "Goodnight Prentiss," he said quietly, and watched her walk up the stairs to the second floor of units. He frowned before walking back to his room.