A/N: Hello there. This is my first try at a Love Actually fanfiction, and I have no idea if anyone bothers to read it at all. I love the film and I love Andrew Lincoln. What can I say? He's about the cutest person on earth when he's feeling troubled (or at least acting troubled)!
Anyway, it's gonna be a love story, as always, but since Love Actually actually is a love story (or many of them) (Sorry, I know that line was lame. I just had to write it.), I think it'll work just fine. At least I hope so. I probably can't make it as funny as the film (no, I definitely can't), but I still thought I'd give it a try.
Okay, so enough of my rambling here. Let's get down to business. Here you go, the first chapter of Right Here.
Oh, almost forgetting the disclaimer. I'm only gonna write it this once this time.
I don't own anything but my own original character. Nothing at all. The rightful owner would be Universal Pictures.
- Miss Sofie.
Chapter One – The Wedding
The church was magnificently decorated. There were flowers everywhere, the sun shone in through the small, colourful window panes under the roof, people where happy and the bride mother cried as her daughter entered the church holding on to her father's arm. The settings were, in short, perfect.
As the organ music began and Juliet walked up the aisle smiling happily by her father's side, I couldn't help feeling that she was the luckiest girl in the world. Not because she was about to marry Peter, the love of her life, but because she had everything. She was beautiful, she had wits, she had charm, her wedding was going to be the most perfect ever (I knew it would be a bit different, though she herself did not know it yet), and she was even loved by the most perfect guy to ever walk this earth.
I should've been happy for her, but I felt somewhat sad as I watched her smiling and walking proudly up to meet her groom. Could she, in any aspect, be less than perfect? I doubted it, and it haunted me. Then she noticed me among the rest of the guests and sent me a big smile. I smiled back, of course, though I didn't feel like it. How did she do that? She even had the energy to single out her friends and make them feel appreciated on a day like this? She truly was amazing, and I realized for the hundredth time in my life why she was hard competition.
Peter, Juliet's husband-to-be, and Mark, his best man and friend, were whispering to each other as Juliet walked up. As always. Not even at Peter's own wedding could they stop talking. Those two must've been worse than girls when it came to talking!
But the sight of Juliet made them shut up, if only for a while. Mark took forth his video camera and began filming. He always did, though we often told him not to. No one said anything today, though.
As everyone else watched Juliet, I watched Mark. To me it was easy to see that he was not filming the wedding. He was filming Juliet, and he was taking her in with every breath that he took all the while she walked up to Peter. I doubt anyone else noticed, but I had known Mark for so long now, and known about his secret too, that it was easy for me to tell that he was hurting. As he removed the video camera from his eye and switched it off, his forehead was contracted in a frown, and his eyes were full of pain.
It hurt me too. I hated to see that expression on the face of my best friend, and it was an expression I had seen more and more often over the past few years. And I could do nothing about it. He was in love with Juliet, but he couldn't make a move as she was Peter's, and Peter was his best friend.
And it hurt me even more because I hated the fact that Mark was in love with Juliet.
While the actual ceremony was going on I held my breath along with Mark. I couldn't see his face anymore, of course, but I knew he'd be holding his breath, hoping that Juliet would say no. I, on the other hand, held mine hoping that she would stick to 'I do', which she, of course, did.
I was somewhat relieved when she and Peter finally turned around to walk out of the church together, though the hurt in Mark's eyes could not be mistaken. He was standing up there in his velvet suit trying to look happy, but he looked miserable. He looked so good and ready to be cuddled, as always, but miserable! I'm glad that everybody looked at the married couple, because if they had looked at Mark at that very moment, his secret would've been revealed.
As Juliet and Peter walked back towards the exit to the tones of the church organ, voices began singing 'love, love, love'. Two big, white curtains were withdrawn in the upper back end of the church and a gospel choir appeared. The surprise on Juliet and Peter's faces was big, but they smiled happily and couldn't help laughing either. Peter turned around and looked at Mark, but Mark just shook his head with a smile telling Peter that it was none of his doing. Peter turned to Juliet and the gospel choir again, as a male singer appeared singing the lead vocal of All You Need is Love. It was easy to tell that the couple was thrilled as more and more people showed up playing different kinds of instruments, and I must say that I would've given a lot to have a surprise like that at my own wedding.
Mark turned to look at me, giving me the thumbs up and mouthing a 'thank you'. The idea had originally been mine, and together we had developed it and in the end Mark had fine-tuned it. I had had no idea it'd work this well in reality, but it sure did.
I smiled back at Mark letting him know he was welcome, and for the first time today he seemed happy. It made a small butterfly take off in my stomach and it flew around inside of me while Mark and I made for the hotel together. It lived on right until Mark let out a 'she looks really beautiful as a bride, doesn't she?' and furrowed his forehead right before we got out of the taxi.
---
The party was held in a big hotel on the bank of the Thames. When looking out of the big panorama windows that were two of the four walls of the hotel, you could see to the far bank of the river and beyond it. Looking to the side you'd see London, and once again I have to admit that the setting was perfect. As the day waned and the night took over, one of the most beautiful sights I had ever seen in London was conjured up before me. All the lights of the city were reflected in the still water of the dark river, and it made me feel melancholy as I stood alone by the window, thinking of someone who was feeling at least as melancholy as I did.
I turned my head to take a look at Mark. He was sitting on a chair looking miserable as he had done all day. Juliet and Peter were dancing, and Mark was watching them a little too closely not to be noticed. Well, no, he was watching Juliet, of course, but the rest of the guests present couldn't tell the difference, of course.
He looked like someone who wanted to talk, and just when I turned around to walk over to him, a young waiter with a big smile showed up like out of no where.
"Another drink, my lovely lady?" He asked taking the empty glass I held in my hand and replacing it with a full one.
"Thank you." I replied with a smile that I know was more artificial than it needed to be. It was just that the waiter had blocked out Mark from my sight and I didn't really feel like him coming on to me, though God knows I could use a little love or just a flirt in my life.
"Another one?" The waiter asked with a hopeful smile and offered me another glass. "Or a strawberry?"
He took a strawberry from the plate that he brought with him and tried to put it into my mouth.
"No, thank you." I said and stepped a little away looking disgusted at him. Was he drunk or was he always like that?
"Do you want to dance?" He asked next, and I nearly spat out the mouthful of white wine that I had just taken.
"Look…" I said trying to be polite though I felt more like just ignoring the pathetic waiter.
"Colin!" He said obviously thinking that I was waiting for him to tell me his name as I hesitated.
"Look, Colin…" I said not wanting to make the situation even more awkward. "I don't really think you're supposed to dance tonight. You're the waiter, I'm a guest!"
I didn't mean to sound so harsh, but he began to annoy me. I mean, he was scarcely out of his teenage years and the hormones were obviously running wildly around in his body. Why would anyone hire someone like him to wait on their guests?
"Your wish is my command, my lovely lady!" He said with a bow which made him almost lose the plate he was carrying. At last he disappeared.
I looked back at Mark and noticed he was no longer sitting alone. A woman a little older than me had placed her chair next to his, and now she was addressing him. I had seen her before. I think she was a friend of Jamie's more than Peter and Juliet's, just like I was a friend of Mark's more than theirs. At least originally. We had all known each other for so long now that I considered them my friends as well as Mark's. And Jamie as well, though there were, sort of, two links between us.
I walked a little closer and heard how the woman, Sarah, asked Mark how long he had been in love. My eyes must've widened as I was surprised to find out that anybody knew. Then she went on and I realized she was talking about Peter. She thought Mark was in love with Peter! She thought….oh my goodness…she thought Mark was gay!
I couldn't help laughing as Mark tried to tell her that that was absolutely out of the question and that he was not in love with Peter!
Don't get me wrong, I don't mind gays at all, but it was hilarious. Mark? Gay? No. Definitely not. Mark had been straight as long as I had known him, which was quite a long time.
---
We met in kindergarten about twenty years ago, I think. It was love at first sight though not the kind of love I came to feel for him later on. On my first day in the kindergarten a big bully stole my rubber boots so I couldn't go outside in the rain. Mark, who was much smaller than the other boy, went through the rain in his bare feet (as he had not had time to put on his own rubber boots), punched the boy in the stomach and brought back my boots. From that moment on he and I were always together and the relationship lasted all the way through basic school. We were what people would call 'inseparable', right until we began getting interested in the opposite sex. I was the first one to do so, since I, being a girl and all, was more mature than he. For a couple of years we both got new friends and new hobbies, though we were still pretty close as friends. Then Mark caught up with me on the maturity scale and we became as close as ever, talking about boyfriends and girlfriends, parents, school, and all other stuff that teenagers talk about.
At prom night in high school Mark asked me to go with him, because as he said, 'he'd never have the courage to talk to Amanda Adams, even if he did screw up his courage and asked her to go, so he could as well go with someone that he felt comfortable about'. And that someone was, of course, me, as we were best friends. At that time I had no hopes for myself concerning Mark at all. We were only friends, and I kept telling him how stupid he was for not picking Amanda Adams. She was the most popular and beautiful girl in school, and I'm sure she would've said yes if Mark had asked her to go with him. He was sweet, smart, funny and very good-looking. I don't believe anyone would've said no.
But he didn't dare, and that's why he and I went together, and that's why he walked me home on the night of the prom. We had had a nice time, and we had had fun. We still had when walking home and the atmosphere was as good as it was ever going to get. We talked about anything and everything, and quite a lot about Amanda Adams. When we reached my home and it was time to say goodbye, Mark gave me a peck on the cheek. He had never done so before, but he did it as if it was the most natural thing to do.
I'm pretty sure it was never his intention and that he knew nothing about it, but it caused quite a turmoil inside of me. From that day on I knew I was in love with Mark, my best friend since kindergarten, but I never told him because I was too afraid I'd lose him if he found out. That was the worst thing that could ever happen.
The second worst thing that could happen was Mark falling in love for real. For years I felt "safe" as no girl could really attract his attention. Sure, he had girlfriends as I had boyfriends, but no serious relationship ever came of it, and I was content with being his best friend as long as he had no girlfriend. It sort of meant that I was the girl who was most dear to him in the world.
Well, at least Mark was my best friend. I'm not sure if he considered me his best friend too, after he began playing soccer and met Peter. The two of them came quite close in no time, and I was often let down for Peter and lots of beer when there was soccer on TV. I guess it's only natural, but I hated it. He could've watched soccer with me, if he wanted to, but he obviously didn't. After a while, though, he seemed to have more time for me again, as Peter had found a girl. When we met the girl, Juliet, it didn't take Mark many minutes to fall in love with her, and it took me around the same amount of minutes to see it in his face. I hurt a lot because of it, but Mark was too much in love and a pain of his own to notice. I guess I'm glad he didn't notice, though the reason why hurt me more than anything.
Anyway, Juliet was a really nice girl, and no matter how hard I tried to hate her, I just couldn't. In no time she considered me one of her best friends, and she, Mark, Peter, and I often went out together. I would've loved it if it wasn't for the fact that Mark always either hurt or his eyes were filled with love for Juliet when we were together. In the end I began saying no whenever they wanted me to go anywhere, and after another while Mark did too. He told me everything about his love for Juliet, and I listened patiently, though I felt like screaming into his face that I couldn't take it anymore and didn't want to hear another word about her. I kept cool and tried to comfort him the best I could, though not the way I would've liked to.
At least his falling in love with Juliet brought one good thing with it. Though it was hard to always hear about her and talk about her, at least it brought us closer again. He turned to me whenever he was feeling down (which was quite often), and I think he began to consider me his best friend again. He did not hate Peter for marrying the girl that he loved, but, naturally, Peter had less time for Mark, and so he spent his extra time with me.
And there we were – two people in love with someone we couldn't have – suffering at an otherwise beautiful wedding. It was ridiculous, to be honest!
---
I walked over to Mark and Sarah after being lost in my own thoughts for a while. She got up from her chair and offered it to me.
"No, please stay." I said with a smile at her and a wave of my hand, but she insisted.
"I was going home anyway." She said and didn't sit down again. "I've been away from my brother too long already." She withdrew her cell phone from her pocket and began dialing a number.
I wasn't sure just what she was talking about, but then I remembered that Jamie had once told me something about her brother not being well mentally. Apparently she was the only one to take care of him, as their parents lived in America. Why she had taken her brother with her to England I didn't recall having heard anything about.
"Well, give your brother my best wishes, then." I said with another smile at Sarah, but she just smiled apologetically at me as she obviously got through to the person she was calling.
"Baby? Hi, it's me…" I heard before she left in quite a hurry.
Mark took his eyes off of Juliet and looked up at me from his chair with his back against the table.
"You're still here? I wondered where you had gone." He said and reached out for my hand to make me sit down.
"Yes, I'm still here… And you're gay!" I teased and sat down.
He gave a little laugh and tried to straighten the furrows in his forehead with his thumb and index finger.
"Be careful not to make them permanent!" I said and pretended to straighten the furrows as well.
Mark took my hand and looked at me with a sigh.
"I need a dance." He said and got up taking me with him. "No, I need a drink and then a dance!"
"Don't tell me you want to dance with me to this song!" I said and followed him to the bar. It was a very slow and romantic song, and I really didn't feel like dancing with Mark to a song like that. At least not when all he could think of was Juliet.
"God, no!" He said and got his drink. "It's a terrible song."
"And you'll put away your video camera?"
He smiled at me and emptied his drink in one draught. Then he put the video camera into its case and put it down on a table.
"It's officially put away!" He said and held up his glass for the bartender to fill it again.
Mark kept stealing glances at Juliet all the while we danced. It annoyed me as much as it hurt me, and in the end I decided to tell him so.
"You're not paying very much attention to your dance partner." I said and smiled at him teasingly.
He looked to the ceiling with a sigh and a small smile.
"No, I'm sorry." He said and looked at me. "I just…can't get her out of my head."
"I know the feeling." I muttered but regretted immediately. I didn't want him to start digging in it. I hadn't needed worry, though. He paid so little attention to me that he didn't even hear me!
"Mark! Honestly!" I said and gave him a gentle slap on the cheek. "You're not exactly making girls feel wanted or appreciated here!"
"Sorry." He said and looked at me again. "But…it's just you! You know I appreciate you and I know you don't want to feel wanted by me!" He gave a little laugh and put his hands on my back as we danced.
God, if he had only known!
As the night went on Mark went on drinking. I tried to make him stop a bit, but on the other hand…I was his friend, not his mother, and I knew he probably wanted to drink his brain out as much as I did. The difference between us tonight was that he did it, I didn't.
Right before Juliet and Peter were about to leave at midnight, Mark heaved his head up in his hand at the table that he was practically lying across. He had been half sitting on a chair, half lying on the table and drinking for a long time, and I had thought about bringing him home for quite a few hours already.
"I'm going to tell her!" He said and tried to sit up straight.
"Oh, no you're not!" I said and wasn't too worried. He was in no state as to get up and go talk to her.
"But I love her." He sobbed and luckily we were the only ones at that table at that moment.
"And you're very, very drunk." I said and padded his head.
"But I can't live without her!" He whined and made me look around to make sure no one heard. Not because they'd know what he was talking about, but because I was beginning to be a little embarrassed because of Mark.
"But you'll have to." I said, maybe not too kind. "Don't you think you'd better get home soon?"
"No, not until I've told her." He replied and made a movement as to get up.
"You're not going to tell her!" I said and held him down.
"Yes, I am." He said and in spite of his drunkenness he was strong enough to shake my hand off and actually get up from the chair and table.
"Mark! No!" I said and got up with him. "You can't!"
"Why not? If I don't tell her now then I probably won't get the chance to ever do so!"
"No one says you ought to have that chance. She's married now. And don't you dare go spoil her and your best friend's big day by telling her just because you're drunk!" I scolded him and held on to his arm to prevent him from going anywhere.
"But…" He said and went out like a light falling into my arms.
"Somebody, help me!" I shouted and luckily people heard me through the loud music.
Peter, who had been on his way out to the wedding car with Juliet, came running to help me with a smile and a shake of his head.
"About time the lad got hammered!" He said and helped me get Mark outside and into a taxi.
"Thanks." I said and gave him a hug before getting into the taxi myself. "I hope you'll be very happy together."
"We will!" Peter said and gave me a big smile. Then he turned around to face his bride and the rest of the guests, who were waiting for Juliet to throw the bouquet.
"Wait!" Juliet shouted with a smile at me just before she threw the bouquet. Lots of women threw themselves around in order to catch the bouquet, but I didn't reach to see who caught it. Juliet threw her arms around me in a big hug and blocked my sight.
"Thank you so much for the surprise in the church!" She said and let go of me. "And tell Mark 'thank you' when he wakes up."
"I won't be there when he does." I said trying to give a little smile. Why did she have to like me and be so nice all the time, when all I wanted to do was dislike her?
"Then make sure he gets home safely!" She said and squeezed my hand a little.
"Yeah. Sure." I said a little impolitely, but she didn't notice. She went back to Peter and the two of them drove off in the night. Mark and I did too, though a lot less happy than the married couple.
A/N: Hey again. Please let me know what you think by reviewing. Does anyone bother to read the second chapter? Or should I just give it up right away? Thanks for reading this far no matter what!