Title: Choices
Author: Sassy
Rating:T
Disclaimer: This is just a fan fic. Reign is owned by CW. I'm borrowing them.
Pairing: Mentions of Mary/Francis and Mary/Bash. All angst.
Summary; Set after No Exit. Mary has time to mull over her choices.
Choices
The moment Francis locked the door to the holding cell, the door to the very cell his mother had been captive in no more than a few months ago, Mary's throat dropped to her stomach. She had made a mistake. She had made so many mistakes. But this was the one she would regret for the rest of her life.
Francis had always thought he knew more than Mary, knew best, took his own interests ahead of anything Mary wanted. He'd been a selfish child, a true dauphin, with his every whim catered to. With this upbringing, what else could she expect but for Francis to decide that what he wanted was always right and a tantrum would follow when he didn't get his way. His current tantrum kept her locked up "for her safety". She was used to his outbursts and insistences that he knew what was best. She could send the same his way with just as much passion. But she was in his country and he held more power than she ever would in France. And this time, his power was going to stop her from helping her country; protecting it and bringing forth the needs of her country to the forefront of their lives. This time it was more than just steamrolling her about women or parties or her wounded pride. This time it was endangering her country.
She had known how Francis would act. She had known him as a boy and again as an adult. She thought that it was something he would grow out of (which she also knew his father, so why she believed Francis would grow out of it when his father was an even bigger petulant child, in hindsight, she didn't know). She had believed that his petulance and believed superiority would be defeated by their epic love, that together they would conquer the world and bring their countries to be the best that they could be. How wrong she had been. How wrong her choice had been.
Bash never would have done this. The minute she would have said that they needed to sail to Scotland, Bash would have dropped everything, found them safe passage to Scotland without forcing her to rely on her Protestant brother James and his traitor footman, and made sure they got their without a hitch. If any trouble had happened throughout the voyage, he would have ended it, either by wit or by sword. He wasn't petulant. He didn't expect his every desire to come to fruition. He understood the ups and downs of life, that life was not always there to serve every happiness and want, and also the importance of Scotland to Mary. He would have done everything in his power to ensure that she would be able to make Scotland safe for Catholics, for her mother, for her own reign.
Bash was nothing like his father. Or his brother. He certainly wouldn't have locked her in a tower where her enemy had once been held "for her own good". In fact, he never would have presumed to tell her what would be for her own good. He would have respected that she could make that decision herself and done his best to help her achieve those goals.
No, he didn't always agree with her. They may have fought about things. But he never would have locked her away because he didn't want to deal with the fact that she dared to disagree with him. He would have argued with her, listened to her, and argued some more until they reached some sort of agreement.
Francis wouldn't even listen to her side. He didn't agree. So what she had to say on the subject was of no consequence.
She should have known better. She was torn, when she was told to choose between Bash and Francis, and she allowed Katherine, her mother, Francis, everyone but Bash convince her that Francis was her true love. Her true love? Her first love? Yes. But true love?
Obviously not. How could she ever love him after this? He had betrayed her. This was the type of betrayal that could never be forgiven. She would never look at him the same way. This was the same kind of betrayal that ensured Bash could never look at Mary the same way after she had given him hope that they would be together, then turn around and marry his brother and consummate it in front of him. Bash would never look at Mary the same and now Mary would never see Francis in the same light.
Bash was such a better person than any of the others at French court. Even after all that had happen, he said he loved her. He still held love in his gaze for her, but it was pained. Maybe that's what would happen when she looked at Bash now.
She had made a mistake. And now she was paying for it. Now her country was paying for it. She would have plenty of time to brood and mull her mistakes over in captivity. She could chastise herself for her choices, dream that despite all that had happened Bash could swoop in and break her out, dream that maybe Francis would come to his senses and release her. But everything would just be dreams now. There was no going back. She had made her choices. Now she was surrounded by them.