Fandom: Naruto
Pairing: Karin/Sai, SasuSaku, one-sided Karin/Sasuke, SaiSaku,
Prompt: "The replacements are really lacking here."
Requester: Minti! (Agent Minti)
Warnings: Umm….the beginning is a bit more…positive than the rest. Oh, and Karin and Sai might be a little OOC…If so, I apologize. (But I was trying to have Karin mature slowly. She's kind of like FANGIRL!Sakura, so I'm guessing she would eventually mature. Ish.)
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There's always a difference between the person looking in the mirror, and the one looking out.
The difference is usually perspective; one is looking at their copy, the other at their original.
The original can change whenever they want.
And the copy will never be anything more than just a copy.
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Mirror Mirror
(Who's the reflection now?)
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1.
When they first met, the air was heavy with tension and the sound thick with clashes. Two groups of people stood, facing each other.
"Sakura-chan…we'll get him this time," a blonde muttered, looking at his pink-haired teammate. She nodded back at him before putting her gloves on. Her other two teammates, a dark-haired boy and grey-haired man also got ready for battle.
Across the field, nearly hidden by the forest's shadow, four figures stood, assessing their enemies. Immediately, one darted towards the blonde, a black blur that had a small blue orb in one hand.
The boy fought back against the challenger and their fight began.
"Hey, I take the hot chick," one figure spoke, getting ready to take off.
"Hot? Her? Are you blind?" another scoffed, tossing her red hair back.
"Well, being in your company, I might have gone blind. Anyways, my tastes are refined, unlike yours."
"I HOPE SHE KILLS YOU!" she yelled at him as he darted off to fight the pink-haired girl. She stood there for a moment, glowering.
In the woods, the sounds of Naruto and Sasuke fighting, Kakashi and Juugo clashing, and Sakura and Suigetsu attacking each other were heard.
"Well, I suppose I get the last kid over there," Karin muttered to herself, heading to the black-haired blob.
Sai looked at her silently before painting two tigers. Quickly, the two creatures pounced on her, leaving her with barely enough time to dodge. Leaping off the ground and landing lightly on one of the tigers, she finally saw her opponent's face.
And noticed how much it looked like her Sasuke-kun's face.
That filled her with anger.
"Hey! YOU! HOW DARE YOU LOOK LIKE SASUKE!"
"…traitor?"
"TRAITOR? You're just jealous you can't be as smexy as he is."
He made a few more strokes on the paper and a dragon flew out this time. As she dodged, she heard his reply, "I thought you just said I looked like him."
His voice was monotone and she quickly retorted. "Well, you COULD have been, but Konoha…the replacements are seriously lacking there." She then attempted to destroy one of the tigers with her kunai—
And failed.
"AND YOU'RE NOT AS STRONG AS SASUKE-KUN EITHER!" she yelled, ignoring her weakness. It was probably just a fluke. Yes. Probably.
"…" he stared at for a while, before he finally replied, "Don't put yourself down, ugly's twin."
"What? UGLY? DID YOU JUST INSULT MY BEAUTIFUL LOOKS?"
"…you're right, though, that you aren't as strong as the hag. She at least destroys the tigers."
"Why you—" she quickly attempted to explode the damn tiger because the only other girl here was the pink-haired menace and even if she does agree with the annoying clone about pinky being washed out, SHE WILL NOT BE CALLED WEAK!
He smiled at her, an eerie smile that didn't quite reach his eyes and looked as though he hadn't moved his mouth like that in a long time.
She shivered a bit before regaining her anger. "Well, you are the weak one. AND I WAS REFERRING TO YOU EARLIER."
"…sure, troll."
Karin screeched out in anger. "WHAT?"
"You know, you are hag's twin," he pointed out, looking from the pink blur back the red-head panting in front of him. The fight had slowly ceased between them, until the only movement was her dodging the tigers and him sitting there.
"HELL NO! I'm prettier and smarter and obviously, better. Besides, you are Sasuke-kun's replacement," she applauded herself silently for not letting her anger get the better of her.
"Traitor's?"
She fought back the rising blood pressure. "You are nothing compared to my Sasuke-kun."
"Good. I wouldn't want you anyways."
She gave up on her anger-controlling—he was obviously asking for it.
-x-
In the end, the group trying to save someone prevailed over the group trying to destroy.
Karin had lost to Sai and sat limp on the ground, biting her lip.
Once again, she was second best.
-x-
2.
When Tsunade handed out her punishments, Karin didn't flinch.
Or at least, she didn't flinch much. Most of the things, she understood—it wasn't any easier to accept, but she understood them and agreed to follow those orders.
(Anything to stay with Sasuke)
However, when she found out that she was going to be supervised by the black-haired artist she faced, Sai, she groaned.
It was slightly better than being with her watery comrade or being under the watch of the blonde idiot, but still…
She had been determined to avoid that boy but, of course, someone up there had to screw up and make that impossible.
Oh well. It would only be for a year or so.
-x-
3.
"...up…" Karin shifted slightly in her bed, ignoring the voice she heard. "…wake up…" she continued to sleep, dreaming of her Sasuke kissing her and how Suigetsu was dying…
"Troll…" Instantly, she shot up and glared at the speaker.
"I'm not a troll!" she hissed, her voice croaking slightly.
"You sound like one," Sai replied.
"…what are you doing here?"
"I have to watch you for a while and we have training. We have to reach there by 7am, and right now it is 6:30 am."
"…I don—" she was about to protest, but then she remembered why she was enduring this. All for Sasuke. "Fine, I'll be ready. AND DON'T PEEK WHILE I'M CHANGING."
"Wouldn't want to, troll."
She glowered as he left and got ready to change. It was going to be a long day.
-x-
"THAT'S IT! LEAVE ME ALONE!" she glared at the offending man, before stomping off. She would show him. She'd show all of them. Just because she wasn't as strong as pinky or able to destroy the Sasuke-clone's monsters, they assumed she was the weakest.
Sai quietly trailed behind her, watching her head back to the apartment she was staying at.
"Why aren't you LEAVING now?" she growled.
"I have to watch you, troll, though I'd leave if I could."
"FINE," she turned and headed into her room, slamming the door behind her. "I'm taking a shower."
When she had finished and got her dinner ready, Sai got ready to leave.
"Finally," she thought, until he said, "…tomorrow we have training."
Oh. Right. She has to face this everyday. Silently, she contemplated suicide.
-x-
Every day became a ritual to her. She'd wake up in her hard bed, with its thin blanket and rough pillow. Sai would be at the door staring at her while he ensured she was getting out of bed. She'd brush her teeth in the small bathroom attached to the bedroom and take a shower, before changing into her usual set of clothes. Then she'd go into the only other room in her apartment, the kitchen, and eat breakfast.
After that, Sai would take her to training and she'd get beaten up by his ink creatures. They'd have lunch at that infernal place of ramen, before either going to a library or training some more, or doing something else.
In the evening, she ate dinner before heading back to her—well, not really. It was more of Konoha's apartment that she was allowed to stay in while she earned her own money—apartment. She'd then take another shower and go to bed.
Occasionally, she was allowed to go on a small mission or saw Sasuke for a little longer than training, but other than that it stayed the same.
It was a routine that occurred day in and day out for several months. She slowly grew accustomed to it, but it was difficult.
The last time she had order in her life, something that she had to expect, was when she used to work under Orochimaru. There the screams of her prisoners and checking the cells fell into a rhythm. At least, it was until Sasuke came and whisked her away.
She used to be in charge, number one…and while she didn't mind Sasuke taking over (he could take over her anytime he wanted), she hadn't fully adjusted to being ignored—Sasuke usually listened to the other guys on the team, not her. And while Suigetsu did tease her occasionally, he didn't pay much attention to her either.
Sai now took over where Sasuke left, and once again she no longer was in command. She was following orders again.
(There was a small part of her that enjoyed the promise of seeing the sun tomorrow and the stability of her life. A small part she refused to acknowledge.)
-x-
Later, much later, after Karin got used to waking up in the morning and the calm, peaceful, mundane thing her life had become, she noticed something. It was a little change, but it felt much more important to her than most big things.
While she was fighting one of Sai's tigers, she had managed to lay a punch on it. A punch that managed to knock it down and across. Sure, she wasn't able to defend herself from the other tiger, but still…
She had grown stronger. Maybe there was a point to this—to staying here like a tamed cat and obeying like a dog.
(Sasuke-kun, can you see me now?)
-x-
4.
Several months passed, where Sai and Karin only met each other occasionally. After sometime, during which Sai constantly watched her—keeping an eye during training, eating with her, making remarks that seemed like teases (but he didn't know how to tease)—the Hokage decided that Team Hawk didn't need to be watched as much any more.
Probably since Team Seven was practically glued to Sasuke and everyone tried to avoid the rest of Team Hawk, it was easy to tell where the ninja were.
Karin had changed slightly during this time. She still was obsessed over her love (why wouldn't she be? He had yet to show his affections to any girl, even pinky, so she did have a chance) and screeched and hit often, but she was a little more mellow. She did occasionally remain calm and she did attempt to at least understand things more.
Still, she was Karin and when she found out she had a mission with Sai, she had to complain about it.
"What? I'm not with Sasuke-kun? I get a replacement? This is disappointing!" she screeched, disappointed. Sasuke hung out mostly with Team Seven, ignoring his old comrades. In the end, they were just tools. He told them that before, but it didn't make the disappointment any easier to bear.
Sai stared at her, before slowly speaking in a monotone voice. "…disappointment… That is when you don't get what you want, right?"
"And he's emotionally stunted as well! WHAT HAPPENS IF I GET HURT?"
"…I'm…disappointed at getting ugly's weaker double."
"Hey!"
Tsunade sighed, massaging her head. "Just go and do the mission. Otherwise, more punishments."
"But, what about Sasuke—"
"He's on a mission with Sakura and Naruto. Now, go."
As they turned to leave, Sai mutters to Karin, "Ugly and traitor seem to be getting closer, these days…"
Karin's eyes widened, before she huffed off. "You're just imagining things."
He silently—what was that word? Wished? Hoped? No, those things he didn't understand yet. Aa…it's—wanted that to be true but he knew better.
-x-
The mission was easy enough and they returned early.
Karin felt proud as they reached Konoha's gates. She had managed to hold her own during the mission, proving her worth.
Maybe Sasuke-kun would notice her more now.
However, those hopes were dashed when she heard the latest rumors.
Sasuke and Sakura were dating.
Sasuke and Sakura were dating.
Her Sasuke and Pinky were dating.
She no longer had a place by his side or in his heart—if she ever had a place to begin with.
Sai noticed her make a fake smile at the news but left her alone. Sooner or later she'd get angry and explode, and maybe try to take back Sasuke. He didn't want to be around when that happened. It's better to let those who knew her best deal with it.
But the biggest reason he left her was because he had a heavy feeling in his chest, the feeling of being spurned. A tightening in his chest—is this heartache? No…he didn't have feelings, but then again…he was slowly regaining them—and the world seemed to sway slightly. This might be something like what Karin was feeling and he wanted to be alone until it passed.
Sakura was out of his reach now too.
-x-
Several days later, when Karin had properly released her anger and Sai had fixed his broken smile, all of the Rookie Nine (even though they aren't rookies any more, they are still referred to as that—maybe to keep some things the same in a world that got shattered), Gai's team, and Team Falcon had arranged for a meeting.
Originally, they were going to meet at a fancy restaurant, however, Naruto had accidentally—more like on purpose; he hated the idea of wearing a tie—destroyed a few tables at the place.
Cursing Naruto, the party was instead held at a club.
Sai arrived a little late to the event and, standing at the entrance, gazed at the ninja. Naruto was pushing drinks towards Sasuke, who just ignored them and closed his eyes. Sakura, Ino, and Tenten were talking, while Hinata watched and tried to keep them from being too drunk. Neji and Shikamaru were in a corner, discussing something, Kiba and Suigetsu were arm wrestling, and the rest of the guys were watching and making bets.
While all of this happened, Karin was sitting alone in the back, a bottle of whisky in front of her and chugging down cup after cup. While the other three males on her team had been welcomed by Konoha—welcomed by the ninja as nearly-comrades—Karin had been ignored by the girls and mocked by the guys.
She usually ended up alone.
(She tried sometimes to at least get her teammates back but they enjoyed their new rivals more than her.)
Sai made his way down to her table. Even though Naruto and Sakura attempted to hang out with him, usually he was left alone as well.
"BASTARD," Karin yelled, her voice harsh and strong. Nobody heard her over Kiba and Naruto's yells of "Drink, DRINK!"—a drinking contest had started—except for Sai.
"Bastard," her voice broke a little now, and she held back a sob. "My Sasuke-kun…"
Sai just stood there and watched her breakdown, his face blank. He had never seen someone cry so much before.
"Why her? Why?" she tried to keep a strong image—she was Karin, a fighter, a person who does not cry.
Karin began to cry.
"Sasuke-kun…" she mumbled, drinking the rest of her whiskey. She was now completely drunk as she cried over how her Sasuke—and Juugo and Suigetsu and everyone—had left her, how no one seems to actually want them—no, it feels more like no one wants her—and this village loves everyone but her.
No one noticed the red-head in the back of the room crying her heart out.
(Karin was tired of being the only one that was ignored. The only one that didn't seem to change for the better—not that she wanted to change, but maybe if she did, Sasuke would still be with her?—and being the only one that was thought of as the evil teammate.)
Sai sympathized—that was the word Sakura had told him. Sympathy; a word that means you know how someone feels and understand.
(Too bad she never understood him)
They were both just replacements to the others, someone to look to when the originals take a break and disappear. They have fake personalities and characteristics, the back-ups in a play (except, unlike the originals, they were faded and washed through). They were spare parts.
Sai had been chosen to replace Sasuke, and Karin—she knew, never wanted to admit it, but she knew it—had been chosen by Sasuke to replace the pink-haired teammate. She was always just a substitute to him.
As Sai understood how she felt, when Karin threw herself on his chest, he just awkwardly patted her head—is this how one comforts another? He wasn't sure. There were many things he had yet to learn.
However, the small jabs of pain he felt were very real and he at least knew what that meant.
They were the pieces of a dream breaking apart.
-x-
5.
There are many things people can and will ignore. They can ignore jabs and jeers, taunts and insults.
There are so many ways people try to push someone to break.
There are so many ways people try to keep going.
Karin silently endured, for the year and a little more, Konoha. She kept trying—all for him, but he didn't seem to notice—and never complained.
(Oh, she yelled back at them and tried to insult them back, but she kept the worst of it to herself. Weakness was not prized by the Uchiha.)
At the store, while she quickly bought some food, she pretended she didn't hear their voices—the old ladies who hid in the next aisle, gossiping over her.
("Oh, she's here."
"Really? No! I guess this place doesn't know how to properly get rid of pests.")
The streets were a dangerous place also, with the sharp whispers—the ones that they claim you weren't supposed to hear but you always do.
("Bitch." "Enemy." "Who should trust that skank?" "Whore!")
When she arrived to her apartment—it wasn't really a home—she cast a blind eye at her door and windows. They were painted red and black.
(The words sent out a message, another threat.)
-x-
Sai also had special treatment—mostly, he was either ignored or looked at warily. He wasn't used to attention anyways, so he didn't mind.
He didn't have any reason to mind it, either. 'Loneliness' and wanting them to know who you really are—those were things others felt. Not him.
("If we ignore him, we can remember the real Sasuke." "He might end up like that traitor.")
As he reminded others of the Uchiha, he was burdened with faults that were not his but assumed to be his. He couldn't escape the long shadow that Sasuke cast, couldn't escape the reason most people noticed him.
He couldn't escape his appearance.
-x-
Karin and Sai usually avoided each other. They didn't get along very well. However, they were allies in a sense—struggling to at least be Sai and Karin, not clone and double.
Even them, they didn't side together very much.
Or at least, make it obvious they were helping each other.
(He said, "You can't make her house even more ugly, after all, it is already the worst," to the boys with paint cans.
She laughed, "Sasuke-kun is so much better and handsome and strong—very different from you," to the Sai when the cautious villagers watched him walk by.)
They never thanked each other for these small saves, these small things that kept them going. They just replied through their actions.
However, they weren't friends.
Not at all.
Never.
(That's what she told herself.)
-x-
6.
As they weren't friends, Sai and Karin never really met more than they had to. They'd see each other at the parties where everyone was invited, during missions when they are the only ones left partner-less, during the meetings when they had to listen to updates.
When they did meet, it usually ended with Karin yelling and Sai looking confused. He had yet to understand how to compliment someone and ended up insulting her instead.
They met for the umpteenth time during Sasuke and Sakura's wedding. All of the people are already paired up and Sai and Karin are the only ones left—once again. It wasn't entirely a good choice, but they bore with it—just like they bore the wedding. Karin faked a smile, her eyes a little dead, while Sai has his plastered on.
(They resemble a couple now.)
During the whole wedding, Karin watched dully as her Sasuke no longer remained hers (and she wondered why she didn't run to him and slap the pink-haired thief away. Why she didn't just stand up and yell and screech, for wasn't that what she's famous for?
She saw him give a small smile at Pinky and she knew why—she really had matured over the years.
He smiled more now (not to her, though. Never to her) and Karin clenched her fist. Later she can go to her shabby apartment—and then yell and screech and cry and wait for the sun to rise.)
-x-
The newly wedded couple started to dance and everyone tried to get onto the dance floor too. There were smiling faces—a lot of drunken ones—in the large crowd of people and then the music shifted to a slow song and people filtered out until only couples were left swaying to the music.
As Karin and Sai were part of the Sakura's and Sasuke's personal guest list, they had to dance to at least a few songs as well. While they slowly twirled around the floor, Karin hardened her eyes and waited for the dance to be over, so she could crawl out of Sai's arms.
Sai looked at Karin for a moment, silently contemplating something. Slowly, he lowered his head and whispered in her ear.
"…remember what you said about substitutes?"
"Yes?" she snapped back, her voice harsh.
"Well, as we two are dancing, does that mean we are substituting as well?"
"…" she looked at him, her eyebrow raised.
"…" he tried to rephrase it. "We want to dance with someone else and are instead substituting each other in their place."
"…"
"So are we real substitutes now?"
"…" Karin's eyes glazed over and she looked away from him for a moment. She watched Sasuke and Sakura leaning close to each other and closed her eyes. "…no."
"No?"
She looked back at Sai seriously. "I said that the 'replacements here were really lacking', right?"
"…" he nodded his head.
"Well, I was right. There aren't any replacements here in the first place. We aren't substitutes."
She looked into his eyes and continued. "We aren't two clones, doubles that are posing together. We aren't faking who our dance partners are. We are a man and woman, dancing together."
"We are just Sai and Karin."
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"This doesn't mean we are friends, ok?"
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A/N: Minti, hope you liked your BELATED!gift!fic.
I seriously need to go find a beta later…I hate having to go through tenses….
(Boy, did this end up long….)
And I'm sorry for the OOC-ness…sighs
Review?