A/N: This story is just a short one shot, what if kind of thing that popped into my head one day. I wrote it as more of a writing exercise than as a full story. Quick summary: What would have happened if Edward and Carlisle had attempted to terminate Bella's pregnancy without her consent? Reviews are always welcome, but please no flames! Hopefully now that I'm back into writing mode I can finish up some of my other fics!
"Bella, I'm begging you. Please don't do this... don't let yourself die this way." I turned my head at his words, my hand resting against the hard roundness that had quickly begun to protrude from in between my hip bones.
"I'm sorry Edward... but..." I gasped slightly as I felt it kick me hard in the side and I knew that a bruise would already be forming. "I can't destroy him. This," I rubbed my belly softly as I spoke, begging him to understand my words, "is our child. It is nothing short of a miracle." A tear began to trickle down my cheek and I saw the panic flash in Edward's eyes but I knew immediately that it was a misplaced concern.
"Are you alright? Where does it hurt?" I shook my head sadly, turning to stare out the window, at the splatters of rain that had begun to hit the window. "It hurts here." I placed my hand over my heart, not taking my eyes off the falling drops of water outside.
I knew that my words weren't sinking in. His frustrated sigh gave him away and I could see him running his hand through his mess of bronze hair out of the corner of my eye. We had been back in Forks for five days now and we had been having this debate regularly, both of us pleading with the other to give in... and to understand the others' side.
I was getting tired of the fighting and while I knew that he was right, that I was risking my life. I couldn't just give in to what they all kept trying to convince me to do; I couldn't destroy this piece of me, this little person that was both a part of me... and a part of him.
I wiped another tear from my cheek as I thought about the reactions from the rest of the family when we had first returned, the hurt and betrayal that I had felt when nearly every one of them had taken their turn trying to talk to me... to talk me out of carrying the pregnancy. Only one single member of the family had sided with me, had supported my decision and while she didn't do so lightly – ensuring that I fully understood the risk that I was taking – she didn't waver from her position by my side. Esme. My second mother. How could I not think of her as such when she had protected me against everyone else, stayed by my side almost constantly and lovingly reassured me?
As usual, our argument ended in silence, my head sinking back against the plush cushions on the couch, my arms wrapping around my torso as the darkness settled in quickly through the rain. I knew that nothing would be solved tonight and as I struggled to keep down the tiny amount of food that I had ingested, I realized sadly that our honeymoon was officially over.
It felt like I had barely closed my eyes when I felt Edward's cool stone arms pick me up and I automatically curled my body in towards his chest, his scent and his presence settling me as he carried me out of the living room, presumably towards our bedroom upstairs. It was the little gestures like this that I had been constantly on the lookout for over the past few days, things that told me he didn't hate me for choosing this, that no matter how much we fought... he was still my husband.
"I'm sure Carlisle. If we don't do it now it will be too late to save Bella... you said it yourself. Listen to her heart." His words were whispered harshly above my head and I knew from somewhere inside my head that they should alarm me. But the calming influence of having him near to me had pushed me to the edge of darkness, the exhaustion confusing my awareness, keeping me trapped in the dreamlike state.
But even his presence couldn't hold me in that strange place between sleep and wakefulness for long.
"It's alright Bella, go back to sleep." his words were deceptively smooth as my eyes tried to blink open suddenly, the hardness of whatever surface he had placed me on and the abrupt release from his arms forcing me confusedly into wakefulness.
But I couldn't stop my eyes from drifting back closed again, my own tiredness betraying my brain's fight. But somehow I still knew that something was going on. This wasn't usual and while my mind was trying to understand, to figure things out; I felt the stinging in my hand, the familiar sensation that caused my body to tremble nervously. My eyes shot back open and as I tried to adjust to the lighting, to look around the room... my fears were confirmed.
"What are you doing?" the words were slightly slurred but clear enough that I knew that they could hear me, could understand my question. I couldn't take my eyes off of my hand where the IV was already inserted, the tape holding it in place and pulling roughly at my skin as I moved it. "Edward no! Don't do this!" I could feel the tears stinging my cheeks again and I tried to pull at the IV, but Edward placed his hand over mine to stop me, my eyes finding his and staring up at him in anger.
"Just relax Bella. It will all be over soon." As he placed the mask across my mouth and nose I struggled against him, pushing at his hand, knowing that it was pointless but trying anyways. It didn't matter, I pressed against his hold, my hands bruising as I held my breath until my body betrayed me, pulling in the tainted air, my senses darkening quickly after that.
"I'm sorry Bella... but we're doing this to save you. We have no choice... we have to get rid of this thing... we have to..."
The darkness closed in despite my struggle to stay awake, to keep fighting for my child. And while the darkness held me down, I knew that they were violating me in a way that I would never forgive... could never forgive.
The searing pain in my abdomen was the first sign that I was coming back around, my other senses picking up and alerting me to the quiet in the room, the cold emptiness that I felt as my memories rushed instantly back at me.
Groaning loudly in pain I opened my eyes carefully, looking up into the dim lighting of our room and I felt my stomach lurch in disgust, in hatred, in pain. Already knowing the answer, I struggled to move my arms, to feel around for the hard mass that before I had been brought up here had been home to my child. But it was no longer there, a searing pain shooting out as I touched the spot where I knew they had cut me open to take him from me.
"How are you feeling Bella?" Edward's face appeared just inches away from my own and I cringed back as his icy hand reached up and tucked my hair back behind my ear and away from my face.
"What did you do?" My voice cracked weakly, but there was still venom in my words as I reached my own hand up and pushed his away from me. He didn't fight me this time and I could see the black and blue bruises on my own hand from where I had fought him before.
"I'm sorry Bella... we had no choice. She was killing you." His expression looked pained, almost regretful but I couldn't feel anything but anger towards him, my heart already aching at his admission as I digested his words. She. It had been a girl. They had taken my daughter from me.
"What did you do?" I managed to choke out again, images of a tiny baby girl flooding my mind at his words.
"She's alright Bella. She's strong... a fighter... and she's perfect." His face changed instantly to one of wonder, his words lighter as he spoke about her, about my daughter. About the child he had tried to murder. It wasn't just any child though. It was my child – his child – our child.
I felt the grief shattering me from the inside and his promises that she was alright did nothing to relieve it. My body was aching as I felt the first sobs begin to consume me, the trembling in my body beyond my control and doing nothing to help with the pain that I was already in.
"Bella..." I couldn't even look at him, the devastation was overwhelming and I wanted nothing more than to get away from here... from them... from this nightmare.
"I'm sorry I wasn't here to stop them Bella. If I had been here I never would have let them... But here... look at her, he's right. She is strong. She is perfect." Esme's soft voice floated in from the doorway and I turned my head to look at her, to see a tiny pink bundle cradled protectively in the crook of her arm.
"Get out Edward." The tears were steady but my voice was stronger as I focused on the woman on the other side of the room and it didn't crack this time. Esme moved several steps further into the room and Edward looked back at me, his face torn as he stayed seated on the edge of the bed. "I said leave. Please... just get away from me." I begged him softly, the tears in my eyes beginning to fall harder, clouding my vision. I was tired and confused and I wanted him to leave and I wanted to see if she was telling me the truth. Was my baby really alright?
Letting out a deep sigh I felt the bed shift as he stood up and then paused, staring down at me before turning and moving slowly towards the door.
"Get away from her!" I screamed as loudly as I could while I tried unsuccessfully to sit up against the searing pain in my abdomen when he paused where Esme was standing and bent down, softly planting a kiss on the tiny baby who whimpered softly before Esme gave him a scolding look and pulled back from him.
"I am sorry Bella." he apologized again and then he was gone, the door closing softly behind him as he left the room. Esme coming closer slowly until she was sitting in the very spot Edward had been only a moment beforehand.
"She's... she's really okay?" I took a deep breath to try and collect myself as I struggled to shift, to see beyond the pink blanket in her arms.
"She's absolutely fine... tiny... but she's tough." The tears flowed even faster down my cheek when Esme shifted and lowered her arm, meeting mine as she passed me my daughter for the first time and I saw her tiny face looking up into my own.
I was immediately lost to my child as I inspected her thoroughly, memorizing each and every precious feature, unwrapping the blanket and counting each of her fingers and toes, admiring the tuft of bronze hair on the top of her head. But as much as I could see her in my arms, her chest rising and falling, and her breaths even and steady – I was still having a hard time believing that she really was alright. I looked over her tiny form a second time, at the way her head almost seemed much too large for her tiny body, at her pale – almost translucent skin, her tiny – smaller than a doll - size.
"How... how is this possible? She's so small... but she seems... so healthy... so perfect?" I was still mesmerized by her as I spoke the words softly and I barely saw Esme smile down at me before she quietly replied.
"When she was born," I cringed at the word born, knowing that it shouldn't have happened that way... that birth wasn't their intent when they had taken her. "I'm sorry Bella." Esme apologized and I turned my eyes back to the baby who was still sleeping peacefully in my arms.
"By the time I came in, they were already taking her out." Esme's face was still saddened but I was surprised to hear the slight hint of anger beneath her words as well.
"It was obvious right away that she was strong and further developed than Carlisle had thought. Most of the time, a child born at this stage needs help keeping their body temperature up, eating... and breathing." Even though I had already inspected her closely, it was instinct when I put my hand first on my daughter's chest to measure her breathing and then on her head to feel for her temperature. "But your little girl didn't have problems with any of that Bella. Like I said. She's strong and even though she's small, she is healthy..." I didn't ask any more questions. I didn't need to know the details right away as I got used to the baby in my arms.
Anger flared up at me again though as I watched her sleep, the betrayal and hurt I felt causing more tears to spring to my eyes.
"What is it Bella?" Esme's voice was soft but not alarmed as she moved her hand and began to stroke my head, comforting me in her gentle way.
"They... they tried... they tried to... I couldn't..." I was breathing heavily and my words were jumbled beneath the sobs. "I don't want... I don't want them anywhere near me... they... tried... to... and then they had her... they held her before... I... could..." it almost sounded silly as I puffed out the words and Esme handed me a tissue for my nose before continuing to stroke my head softly.
"I took her as soon as we were positive that she was healthy... Edward hasn't even held her." It still felt like such a small thing but it mattered to me and I was relieved that he had been denied her while I was unconscious. That Esme had continued to act on my behalf when I was unable to.
"Why don't you let me take her Bella? You need to rest, you look absolutely exhausted." I don't know how long I had been laying there with her in my arms with Esme beside me but I could feel the pain getting stronger, almost past what I could bare. But there was no way that I was letting my daughter out of my arms, out of my sight.
"No, I'm fine with her." my words came out a little bit sharper than I had intended them to and I bit my lip once they were out, offering her an apologetic look. She gave me an understanding smile and nodded her head. Looking back at my bundle I watched as her eyes fluttered open, brilliant green orbs looking up at me curiously while a soft whimper escaped her lips.
"She's probably getting hungry." I was surprised with myself when the hiss escaped my lips, making me sound almost feral as my eyes turned back to the door where both Edward and Carlisle were standing, two small bottles held in Carlisle's hand.
"Formula... and Blood..." he said as Esme stood up and calmly walked over to them, her face as cold as ice while she wordlessly took the bottles from his hand.
"Do you need anything for the pain Bella?" Carlisle's voice grated at me and I shook my head stubbornly even though the pain was getting much stronger, nearly crippling to me.
The baby in my arms whimpered again and as I shifted her slightly, I felt the unfamiliar dampness on the front of my shirt. Making my decision in an instant I yanked the pajama shirt roughly up and did what felt natural in the moment, bringing my daughter's slightly open mouth to my breast where she latched on without a problem, the pull from her mouth much stronger than I expected as she greedily fed from me.
"She may not have the sucking reflex to be able to nurse..." he paused and looked down at us, his surprise evident as she continued to feed. "She may get tired easily Bella. Breastfeeding is a lot more work for an infant than bottle feeding and being as small as she is... I'm surprised she has been able to at all." Carlisle had taken several steps into the room before I shot him an angry glare and he stopped mid-step, his hands partially raised in the air in surrender.
"Do you have a name for her yet Bella?" Esme's voice sounded a few minutes later from across the room as I continued to feed my daughter and I smiled up at the only person who I felt I could trust at the moment. Thankfully Esme had quickly ushered both Edward and Carlisle back out of the room after only a couple of minutes of gaping at me and we were alone again.
"I think I have." I bit my lip nervously and waited for a moment as Esme's excitement seemed to grow and she sat back down beside the bed, her fingers twisting in her lap as she waited for me to continue.
"Well... I have two mothers that I wanted to honor in her name... my own mother who gave birth to me and loved me unconditionally. And my new mother... the only person who supported me unconditionally throughout my short pregnancy and even now... you. I was playing around with your names and I came up with Renesmee... Renesmee Charlotte." I bit my lip nervously as I spoke it out loud for the first time and my daughter's eyes snapped up to mine, a recognition appearing in her emerald orbs.
"Oh Bella... it's lovely!" Esme's voice was filled with surprise and I thought for a moment that she might be getting choked up herself.
A few minutes later I glanced down at the baby to see that she had fallen asleep, her mouth releasing her suction and I lifted her gently up, Esme helping me to pull my shirt back down before I laid Renesmee back against my chest.
"You should try and get some rest Bella," Esme's voice wasn't demanding and I nodded my head slightly as I felt her pull the blankets up and around the both of us.
"Let Carlisle give you something for the pain... it will help you to rest so that you can recover properly." I knew that she was right and that being stubborn wouldn't help me now, it would only hinder me. But I couldn't control the swirl of disgust at the thought of him coming anywhere near me, his betrayal of my trust hurting me nearly as much as Edward's had.
"Did everyone agree with Edward?" I didn't reply to her question about the pain management but Carlisle appeared in the door anyways, a small bottle of pills in his hand. Esme looked uncomfortable as she looked down at her hands and I once again found myself blinking back tears. Carlisle's face was apologetic but I couldn't feel anything but anger towards him as he moved quickly into the room, setting the small bottle of pills on the nightstand before leaving faster than I could see, the only evidence he had been there at all being the rush of air across my skin.
"We were all out hunting... Alice and Rosalie had been the ones to insist that we all go and I didn't think anything of it until I felt this strange pull to come back to the house and to see that you were alright. That was when Alice told me what Edward and Carlisle had planned. Every one of them knew what was happening here at the house and while they keep trying to tell me that they didn't agree with it – each of them was guilty in their actions." She swallowed thickly and I could hear her own pain and realized that I was not the only one who had been betrayed. "I'm sorry Bella... I came back as quickly as I could but it was too late by the time that I got here."
We were both crying now as I begged her not to leave me alone, begged her to stay with me and not let the others near us. The depth of hurt I was feeling was nothing that I had ever felt before, even when Edward had left me for the sake of my safety I had never felt this angry, this betrayed. It ached and stung, but more than that my chest felt raw – empty. My heart was not just broken but shattered.
For the next several days I remained trapped in the bedroom that I could no longer think of as ours. Now it was his room and it was tainted by what he had attempted to do, and as I stayed there... letting my body heal and adjusting to life as a new mother to a quickly growing child, I spent hours trying to decide what to do next.
I knew I would have to leave the room eventually and they had all been reminding me of that as they attempted to apologize for their actions daily. But I was beyond hurt and my trust in them had been broken to the point where I didn't know if I would ever be able to recover it. It was difficult enough to accept Carlisle in the room while he examined my incision site and performed Renesmee's checkups, charting her irregular growth daily. He had tried to talk to me each time, but I was consistent with him and still refused to accept his apologies.
Edward was a whole other story.
"You are so beautiful my little princess." Renesmee looked up at me with her emerald green eyes, her features that reminded me so much of her father and I smiled down at her. She was a quiet baby, content to sit with me, looking around the room, taking in her surroundings. She didn't cry, only whimpering from time to time and as I watched her grow physically... her premature size and features quickly becoming those of a normal newborn within a single week, I also saw the way she learned, the way that she seemed to be maturing... understanding.
"Bella, may I come in?" I turned around to glare at my husband who was leaning against the door frame, his hand running through his hair nervously.
"Stay away from us Edward." I hissed and saw the hurt expression on his face as he glanced between Renesmee and I. This was the closest Esme or I had allowed him to get to us and I could see him looking her over, taking in all of the changes that she had already gone through.
"Bella... I was wrong. I'll never be able to tell you how sorry I am... how much I regret what I..." he apologized and I heard his voice crack as he continued to lean against the door, his frame hunched over defeated.
"You tried to..." I didn't finish what I wanted to say as I saw Edward's head snap up, turning to look towards the window his face flashing worriedly back at us as he growled in what seemed like frustration but only caused me to pull Renesmee in tighter to my chest. Holding onto her gently but firmly, my fear of him evident.
"What is it?" I asked when he didn't offer what had disturbed him and he took a deep breath before opening his mouth again to speak.
"It's Charlie... he's almost here." My fear of Edward drifted to the back of my mind and I felt the color drain from my face at this news. Charlie had still been calling daily, and the Cullens had been trying to keep him updated with my condition that I had supposedly picked up on our honeymoon. But I had also been unwilling to talk to him at all, not knowing what to say to him. I should have known better though. I should have known that Charlie wouldn't just leave that alone and that he would be pulled to investigate further.
"Where are you going Bella?" I had brushed past Edward with Renesmee still securely in my arms and begun to descend the stairs before he reached out and grabbed my shoulder, stopping me from going any further.
"I'm going to see Charlie." I said simply but he didn't let go and I felt myself getting further annoyed at him. "He deserves to see that I'm alright. And since I'm not planning on becoming like you anytime soon, I don't see why I can't keep him in my life now." Edward looked as though I had slapped him with my words and as I continued to move carefully down the stairs, Carlisle appeared at the bottom.
"He can't know about Renesmee Bella, it's too dangerous... too unexplainable." he said calmly but I didn't stop, I brushed past him and continued to the front of the house, seeing the car seat that Alice had bought in apology sitting brand new in the corner and I had a sudden urge to leave, to go home.
"What are you doing Bella?" I heard the doorbell and as I buckled Renesmee into the car seat I felt a strange surge of relief flood through me, knowing that I needed this right now.
"We're going with Charlie." Now the entire family was standing around me, their faces filled with shock as I stood and picked the seat up, the doorbell ringing a second time, followed by a loud pounding on the door.
"You can leave Bella... but you can't take the baby." Edward's hand was gripping the car seat and I knew that I would never be able to pull her out of his grasp on my own. I could feel my eyes brimming with tears, the hurt, anger and frustration that had built up since Renesmee's birth making me ready to explode. I didn't know what to do next. Charlie was still pounding on the door, my incision site was burning from the sudden exertion and I knew I would never win against any one of them.
"Let her go Edward." Esme moved to stand in front of me and I felt a chill run down my spine at the menacing look she gave Edward, but he didn't budge from his spot, his grip still holding firm to Renesmee's seat. "I said let go." My face was shocked as I watched Esme raise her palm up, her slap hitting him flush across the cheek, the sound reverberating throughout the house loudly. He must have been just as surprised as I was, his hand releasing almost immediately and I pulled away quickly, squeezing between Alice and Emmett and moving towards the door.
"Thank God Bella!" my dad exclaimed as soon as I threw the door open, his arms reaching to embrace me before he saw the car seat that was still clutched tightly in my hands.
"What's going on?" He asked suddenly wary and I shook my head as I felt the family standing behind me, their presence making me even angrier as Charlie looked me up and down, his eyes nearly bugging out of his head.
"Can we come back to your place? Stay with you for a while?" I was on the verge of tears again and I felt suddenly unsure as I muttered the question, but I shouldn't have as he quickly put his arm around my shoulder. "Please Dad!" Without asking any other questions he lead me out to his car, strapping in Renesmee's car seat himself before getting in his own seat and putting the car in gear.
I had never been so happy to ride in his police cruiser. Charlie on the other hand looked ready to kill someone.
I had to give it to Charlie though. I knew he was filled with questions as we wound carefully down the familiar road back to his house, but he didn't push me to talk, the silence between us welcoming, familiar. By the time we arrived, Renesmee was sound asleep and I brought her into the living room with me, leaving her to snooze peacefully in her car seat.
"Bella?" It was a simple word but I knew him and I knew it meant more than just my name. He wanted to make sure that I was alright and he wanted to know what was going on. It was time to tell him what I could before he left the house again to hunt down Edward.
"I'm sorry Daddy." The words spewed out of my mouth and I felt my shoulders begin to quake as the torrents began to fall again. It wasn't what I had intended to begin with and I felt the warmth of his arms as he pulled me against him in a hug, holding me tighter than I had ever felt him hold me before, while I let the tears fall one after another.
Time stood still as I cried out the hurt and the anguish of the last two weeks and Charlie waited patiently, holding onto me and fighting back his own sobs every so often until I finally hiccuped one last time and then nearly collapsed to the sofa in exhaustion.
Charlie didn't press me and it was only minutes later that I felt my eyes beginning to close and a heavy quilt was draped across my body as I felt myself sink back into the sofa. But seconds later my ears picked up the familiar sounds of tiny movements and I blinked up through the tiredness to see Renesmee awake in her seat, moving her head to take in her surroundings.
"What's her name?" Charlie had come back into the room as I dragged my body up and over to her seat, unbuckling the straps and pulling her into my arms.
"Renesmee Charlotte." I answered him quickly, returning back to my spot and holding my daughter so that she was facing out, facing the room around me. "She's my daughter." I confirmed, adding on the last bit with a small smile on my face and Charlie answered me only with silence. I could see him working the numbers through his head, trying to calculate how this was possible.
"She's like the Cullens... like Edward?" I should have known that he had at least suspected something but his words still managed to take me by surprise as he spoke them and I stared blankly at the wall, trying to figure out why I had done this, what I was going to say to him. As much as I was angry at Edward – at everyone - I couldn't give away their secret, but I also had to say something to Charlie.
"She's... different..." I was still trying to come out with the words and I looked down at my angel again, her face now looking up at me curiously.
"I wish I could explain it Dad, but the truth is... I just can't." I was beginning to tremble again and I knew the tears wouldn't be far off so I focused down on Renesmee while I regained control of my emotions.
"Did he hurt you Bella?" Again his next question threw me off and I didn't know exactly how to answer him without telling him everything.
"No... yes... sort of." I shook my head and took a deep breath. "It's complicated Dad... but yeah... they did something really stupid and I'm pretty angry right now." I tried to be vague but truthful and when I looked back at Charlie he was furious at the idea of Edward hurting me, his face turning red as his fists clenched in his lap. He was still trying to reign in his anger when both of our heads snapped up to the sound of the doorbell ringing and I froze on the couch.
After the bell rang a second time, Charlie's face began to lose a little bit of the redness and he pressed his palms against his thighs as he stood up and turned towards the entrance.
"Dad?" He paused mid-step and turned back to me without saying a word. "Dad... nobody can know about Renesmee..." I felt my voice waver and Charlie nodded his acknowledgement, continuing on to the front door where he paused and took a deep breath before opening it.
"I'm sorry to interrupt Charlie," I recognized Esme's soft voice from the other side of the wall and breathed out a sigh of relief. I had been worried that it was either one of Charlie's friends and he wouldn't be able to get rid of them... or that was one of the other Cullens to bring me back to their house.
"What do you want?" he didn't hide his anger and I shifted so that I was standing with Renesmee in my arms and headed towards their voices.
"It's alright Dad," I touched his shoulder gently but he didn't budge from his position in the doorway, blocking her from my view. "Esme is fine Dad she's the only one of them I trust right now, let her in." He shifted just slightly and I saw the apologetic look on her face as she held out a large duffel bag in one hand and a diaper bag in the other.
"I'm sorry to interrupt Bella, but I thought you might be able to use these." I smiled at her in thanks before she silently retreated back to Carlisle's car and I thanked her quietly – knowing she would still hear as I brought one of the bags into the house and watched as Charlie grabbed the other.
"Are you going to tell me what the hell is going on now Bella?"
"What do you want to know Dad?" I sighed as I sat back down and Renesmee looked up at me curiously. I waited patiently for Charlie to gather his thoughts into questions, realizing that Renesmee was probably hungry I began to feed her, Charlie's eyes once again nearly bugging out at the sight even though I was fully covered.
"When was she born Bella?" He asked his first question and I relaxed. This was an easy one. "She's only a week old, she was born September 5th." I answered and smiled down at her lovingly.
"When was she... conceived?" This one was a touch trickier but I figured he deserved the truth... at least as much of it as I could give him. "She was conceived on our honeymoon... she's different Dad, like Edward. And I wish I could tell you more, but I can't... not about that." I was doing pretty well and he seemed to be taking everything in well.
"What happened with the Cullens?" he asked and I looked down at her, at my tiny baby girl nestled against my breast, still sucking greedily away, watching us closely as though waiting for me to answer Charlie's questions.
"Because they are different... the pregnancy was extremely unexpected. None of us knew that it was even possible... and once it happened we disagreed on what to do. As you can probably figure out, it was an extremely short pregnancy and it was very difficult. She is strong and because she is part Edward, it was a risky pregnancy. We disagreed on what to do and on the night of September 4th, after I had fallen asleep he and Carlisle attempted to terminate the pregnancy without my consent." I swallowed thickly and Charlie was once again turning red, his fists clenched against his thighs. "Esme was the only one who didn't go along with their plan, she didn't even know about it until it was too late. Carlisle hadn't expected Renesmee to be so far developed when they took her... it's the only reason she's here with me now." I felt the tears flowing down my cheeks again and I was glad when I looked down and saw Renesmee sound asleep once again.
"You both can stay as long as you need Bella... I'm... I'm sorry I wasn't there." Charlie's apology surprised me and I realized that he was too much like me. He was blaming himself for not being there for me during everything; as if he could have known about anything that was going to happen.
"Dad... there's nothing you could have done... you couldn't have known... but look, can we talk more in the morning though Dad? I'm really tired and I'd like to sleep while she is." I stood up carefully and looked over at him. He only nodded at me as I grabbed the infant seat and began to head up the stairs, him following a minute later with the bags that Esme had brought.
I wasn't surprised when I saw the luxury pack and play set up in my old bedroom, barely pausing in the door when I saw it there beside the bed. Everything else about my room was identical to the way I had left it.
"Where do you want these Bells?" Charlie asked awkwardly from the doorway, my bags hanging in his hands as he gaped at the playpen in the room. I gestured to the bed with my head and he placed them down, his eyes never leaving me as I set the baby down and began to get her ready for bed, changing her diaper and putting a fresh sleeper on her.
Once I had her all ready for bed I picked her up gingerly and looked through the bag quickly, taking an inventory of everything that Esme had brought before I saw the small cooler bag in the bottom. When I opened it up I was not surprised to see the small supply of blood packed in ice.
"Uh Dad... do you want to hold her for a minute? I've got to go put something in the fridge." I grabbed the small cooler bag and looked at my dad cautiously, gaging his reaction. He simply put his arms out and as I placed the small bundle in the crook of his arm I saw him smile widely down at her.
I flew down the stairs as fast as I could, anxious to get back up and head to bed. My eyes were heavy with the stress of the day and I knew I only had so long before Renesmee would be awake again.
As I walked back into the room I nearly melted at the sight of Charlie swaying carefully back and forth, his eyes glued to my daughter... to his grand-daughter. When he sensed me in the room with him he handed her back to me and I placed her down in the bassinet portion of the playpen, watching her sleep for a moment before I moved over to my dad and wrapped my arms around him.
"Thank you dad." I murmured against his chest and felt his arms wrap around me, holding me tightly.
"I told you Bells... this will always be your home." I felt the tears threatening to spill again and then I thought of something that concerned me.
"You're not... you aren't going anywhere tonight are you Dad?" I asked nervously and felt myself getting anxious when he didn't reply right away.
"Promise me that you aren't going over there tonight Dad... please." Charlie shook his head and as the light caught his face I saw the slight glimmer in his eye before he blinked and I saw his mask come down to cover his emotions.
"I ought to go over there and..."
"Dad, no. Please." I interrupted him before he could say anything. "This is between me and Edward and I'm sorry that I dragged you into this. If it's easier, Renesmee and I can leave but you need to let me deal with Edward." I begged him, even though a part of me wished that my dad could defend me to Edward.
"Bella... he hurt you." Charlie's voice wasn't as firm as I was expecting, the slight crack giving away how much it bothered him that Edward had hurt me. But it still didn't make it Charlie's fight. It was mine.
"I know Dad. And I'm angry and hurt and I just need somewhere to stay, someone to be here for me while I try and figure out what to do next. Please Dad, that's what Renesmee and I need right now." As much as he tried to blink them away I watched as several tears slid down my father's cheek and he reached over to give me an awkward one armed hug before promising me that he would let me deal with Edward. I had never loved my father more.
Curled up in bed that night I couldn't help but feel the loneliness creep up on me. I was grateful to be with Charlie, to have somewhere that Renesmee and I could take refuge in, but at the same time I was angry and saddened that I wasn't with my husband, that the rest of my family – my second father, my sisters and my brothers - had all betrayed me. By the time I finally fell asleep Renesmee woke up soon after, her infant needs reminding me that I was a mother. It was an indescribable feeling as I sat up with her on the bed, staring down into her eyes as she fed first from me and then from the bottle of blood I pulled from the refrigerator at her continued fussing. I had no idea what I was doing with her, with my child that was so unique, so different, and so precious. But I knew that I had to do it. I had no other choice but to help us both to survive.
And so the days passed as we stayed locked inside Charlie's house. Renesmee continued to grow, although to my human eyes it did appear to be slowing down slightly, the changes not quite as obvious from one day to the next. When we first arrived, Charlie took two days off of work and spent them at the house with us, not asking me too many questions, just enjoying having us there with him. It was comforting to have him there and to see a side to him that I hadn't really seen before as he cuddled with my daughter, talking to her and playing with her – even changing her diaper for me occasionally. On our third day there Charlie returned to work and I relaxed in the living room with my daughter, trying to plan out what I was going to do next, where we would go from there.
The truth was that even after trying to plan for an entire day, I didn't know. Renesmee was not a normal human child and we couldn't go somewhere and just blend in. She also needed blood. Blood that I had no idea whether or not I would be able to provide for her.
I had given up trying to figure it all out when there was a knock at the door and I froze in my spot on the floor, Renesmee looking up at me curiously from my lap. At the sound of Esme's voice reassuring me I told her to come on in. She had brought me a few more of my things from the house and more supplies for Renesmee, bigger clothes, more blood. I was grateful to her and told her so. She stayed with me for several hours, holding her grand-daughter and letting me talk out some of my frustrations and leaving just before Charlie came home that night.
But I still didn't know what to do, where we could go. We couldn't stay there locked inside of Charlie's house forever.
"Can I come in Bella?" I heard Esme's soft voice again on our sixth day at Charlie's and picking up Renesmee on my hip; I moved to unlock the door for her, stopping short when I saw Carlisle standing there behind her.
"What are you doing here?" I shifted the baby so that she was facing my chest, my arms wrapped protectively around her as I stared coldly at the doctor standing in the door.
"I need to check your incision site Bella to make sure that it's healing alright, and I was hoping to look over Renesmee, take some measurements... she's obviously still growing rapidly." I was getting angrier by the minute, never forgetting what he had done, what he had allowed Edward to convince him to attempt to do and the way that he had betrayed me.
"Please Bella," he asked softly and I nodded stiffly then, turning to look at Esme and then back down at Renesmee. "Why don't you show Grandma what you've learned to do baby-girl?" She looked up at my face and I saw the same mature understanding in her tiny face that I always did when I spoke to her. Kissing her head I passed her over to Esme who took her upstairs, remaining awkwardly in the doorway until I heard Esme's excited squeal.
"My incision is fully healed." I turned back to Carlisle who was still standing in the small entryway, looking up the stairs curiously towards where Esme and Renesmee had gone.
"May I?" he looked back at me and gestured towards my stomach, my body turning and moving into the small living room before I lifted my shirt slightly to show him the healed sight, the pink line looking months old rather than the two weeks it had really been.
"I don't understand how it has healed this fast." I bit my lip, knowing the answer myself but not willing to share how I knew it. I was guarded against this man who had abused my trust and hurt not only me, but who had tried to hurt my daughter. "You know how, don't you Bella?" unfortunately my poker face still needed work and I sighed as I looked down at my hands nervously.
"Bella?" he prompted when I still hadn't said anything.
"Renesmee is still nursing regularly, she hasn't had any problems with it and I've learned to understand when she wants milk versus blood." His face almost seemed to pale slightly before I continued, most likely guessing where this story was headed. "She still needs to feed at night and two nights ago I brought her into bed with me to feed her, it was two-thirty in the morning and I was exhausted. I guess we both started to fall back asleep until she bit me." I didn't look up to see what he was thinking, it was bad enough that I had to admit that she had done it.
"She was asleep and as soon as I felt it burn from where she was feeding I pried her off and she woke up. She was upset at what she had done and I tried to comfort her, but it was burning slightly as I felt her venom spread throughout my body. It didn't last long though and when it was done my incision looked like this. I'm pretty sure it was the venom that healed it..." I finished off and chanced a look up at Carlisle to see his expression blank, void of expression.
"She doesn't have teeth... and Renesmee isn't venomous." Was his only answer and I rolled my eyes at him. "She's got eight teeth now, they've come in quickly and are razor sharp. As for the venom... You tested her right after she was born prematurely Carlisle. She's venomous now and I believe it has something to do with her teeth coming in... it's obviously not potent enough to cause me to transform... but I guess as she gets older it could..." I said slowly, trying to control my temper.
"You said that she was upset about what she had done Bella?" he didn't dare to try and argue with me anymore, sensing my anger flaring up again.
"She's gifted." I said simply and saw the spark in his eye at this new knowledge.
"May I see her?" there was an awkward pause before I answered, my need to protect her strong as we sat there and I watched him glance back upstairs towards my bedroom.
"Why?" I asked coldly after a minute and then expanded. I knew the answer he would try and give, but I didn't want to hear it. "She doesn't need to be measured Carlisle. She's still growing fast, but it is slowing down. I don't need you constantly measuring her to know that I might not have that long with her." I hissed quietly at him, the tears pricking my eyes at the thought of her future, so much shorter than any normal humans. I had done some of the math, had done some rough calculations to try and determine how long she might live if she continued to grow this rapidly.
"I'm sorry Bella..." he trailed off and then his shoulders hunched over as his body shook and then I heard his first sob escape his mouth. I fell into shock as I sat in the chair across from him, my mind reeling at the sight in front of me. Carlisle was dry sobbing into his hands, the strongest man – human or vampire – I had ever me, sobbing in front of me.
"Esme?" I called cautiously after a minute, not knowing what to do. I knew that I had done this, I had brought this man to his knees... but I didn't feel relief at his suffering, I felt ashamed, hurt, angry... and most of all, confused.
Esme appeared at the foot of the stairs a second later, Renesmee still in her arms as she looked around the room in front of her, me sitting in Charlie's chair, Carlisle on his knees on the floor in front of me.
"I'm sorry Bella. Believe me when I say that I would do anything to go back and change my actions. In three hundred years I have never taken a human life... but Bella, when Edward found you, you became our daughter. We couldn't lose you and I made the wrong decision Bella. And for that one decision I will spend every single day of the rest of my existence trying to make it up to both you and Renesmee.
As Carlisle stayed there in front of me, his head bowed down and looking at the floor I gestured slightly to Esme, reaching my arms up for my daughter as they neared me. I was confused and didn't know what to do. I didn't trust Carlisle. He had hurt me nearly as much as Edward had. I had looked to him as a second father, I had respected and valued his stance on the protection of human life. And yet he had been responsible for his actions the night Renesmee was born, he had assisted Edward on his mission to take away life – my daughter's life.
"Carlisle?" I asked softly, my voice cracking slightly as I said his name. He looked up at me hopefully and I pulled Renesmee closer to me as she sat on my lap, looking at her grandfather from within my arms.
"It is going to take a long time for me to heal emotionally from what happened... and while I can't fully forgive you yet for your actions, I am willing to try. I understand that you thought that you were doing what was best for me at the time, but like Edward, you need to understand that I am perfectly capable of making my own decisions, of deciding what is safe for me." I spoke clearly and was proud of the fact that I wasn't crying again. Carlisle shifted off the floor when I was done, wiping his face as though he had cried actual tears and moving to the sofa across from me.
"Nessie, do you want to go say 'hello' to Grandpa Carlisle?" I looked down at my daughter who looked back at me slightly fearfully before I nodded my head and gave her a reassuring smile. Standing with her I moved slowly towards him and shifted her away from my body, handing her over carefully as he took her easily into his arms, the surprise at my actions evident on his face.
Almost immediately she moved her tiny hand up to his face and I nearly laughed as his face turned from surprise to shock to awe. I knew what she was doing, that she was probably showing him her life here at Charlie's, her remembrance of her own birth, the little things and the big things. Carlisle's face began to change, his face showing his horror and his remorse at what he had done – at what she remembered.
"We brought more blood Bella," Esme spoke quietly and handed me the cooler bag. "Thank you." Standing I moved to quickly put it in the fridge, before coming back in and sitting down across from Carlisle and Renesmee. "She's not craving the blood as often now, it's gone from several time a day down to one or two... but now when she craves it's taking more at once to satisfy her." I said to Esme, concern mixed in my words. I didn't know if her habits were normal... if there was a normal and I was worried about her, worried that I was doing something wrong.
"She'll be fine Bella," Esme knew my fears and she knew how to reassure me, "Just follow her cues and she will tell you when she's hungry or when she's thirsty." She put her arm around me as Renesmee pulled her hand away from Carlisle's cheek, a large yawn escaping her. It had been a busy afternoon for her and I knew that using her gift tired her out quicker.
I moved to take her then, going upstairs and feeding her before placing her already sleeping form down in the playpen for her nap. Kissing her head softly I ran my hand through her bronze ringlets once before I headed back downstairs.
"She's absolutely amazing Bella," Carlisle's voice cracked and Esme moved to sit beside him, entwining her fingers with his as I nodded my head in recognition.
"Would you consider bringing her to the house, letting the rest of the family get to know her? Or even allowing a few of us at a time to come and visit you and her here?" Carlisle sounded unsure as he asked the question and I took a deep breath before giving him my answer, careful to bite my tongue and not lash out at him, to say the things that I wanted to say.
"I don't want to see Edward." It was all that I could manage to say and Esme smiled over at me in understanding, Carlisle unsure of what my statement actually meant.
"My dad will bring us over tomorrow, as long as Edward isn't there." I said more clearly this time.
"Are you sure you want to do this Bells?" My dad had not been as willing to try and forgive the Cullens as I was. When he had gotten home from work the previous evening he had been less than thrilled when I told him that I was planning a trip to the Cullen house, a trip where I would let the rest of my family see my daughter.
"I'm sure Dad, we will be fine. And Edward isn't here. Esme just sent me a message and confirmed that he was told to leave for the day." I said, trying to swallow my own nerves as the house came into view, the place I had considered my home now feeling foreign to me.
Thankfully Esme was the only one who came out to greet us as Charlie pulled the car to a stop in front of the massive white house, not moving to get out just yet. "I'll be fine here Dad, I'll call you if I need you to come get me, okay?" I asked and he nodded. He wasn't as ready as I was to allow this interaction with the Cullens and I honestly didn't blame him.
"There's my Sweet-Ness!" Esme cooed as I pulled Renesmee's infant seat out of the back of Charlie's cruiser and moved towards the woman standing on the porch. Taking Nessie's seat from my hands she led me into the house, her arm on the small of my back as we moved directly into the living room. I was surprised to see only Carlisle in the room as we entered, his hands clasped nervously behind his back as he looked out the window.
"Good morning Bella," he said uneasily as Esme began to take Renesmee out of her seat, her eyes twinkling happily as she picked her up.
"Good morning," I replied cordially. I had promised myself I was going to be polite, allow them to visit with Renesmee and go home without any outbursts.
Gradually the rest of the family joined us in the room, all of them looking at me with sadness, awkward apologies passing between us before they each took turns officially 'meeting' Renesmee. Soon though I began to feel crowded in the living room as I sat in the corner of the couch and I eyed them all as they took turns talking to and playing with Renesmee. Excusing myself quietly I moved outside the back door where I could still keep an eye on them but it felt more open, less claustrophobic. It was silly really. The way I was watching them, my eyes not leaving my daughter for an instant. But they had all been in on it, every one of them had known what Edward had chosen to do and not one of them had tried to stop them. So it was only natural that I didn't trust them now even though I could see how much each of them already adored her.
"Bella... can I speak to you for just a moment?" I froze at the sound of his voice, my eyes on the room in front of me, not daring to turn and face him behind me.
"Please Bella?" I don't know what it was that finally forced me to turn around and face him but I only barely saw his face before Esme was standing protectively in front of me, her arms crossed defensively across her chest.
"I told you that you weren't to be here today Edward." She spoke icily to him and his face looked pained as I tried to peer around her.
"Please Esme... Bella... I just... I just wanted to apologize and tell you of the provisions that I have made for you and Renesmee." He pleaded with us and I groaned, slapping my hand to my face in frustration with both him and myself.
"It's fine Esme... you can go back inside with Renesmee." I touched her shoulder and she turned to look at me, "Only if you are sure Bella... you don't have to see him right now if you don't want to." she said directly and I nodded my understanding. "It's fine." I confirmed and she hugged me briefly, telling me to call if I needed her to intervene at any time.
"She's getting so big," he said wistfully as he looked behind me and through the glass wall of the house, where Renesmee was currently on Emmett's lap, and a look of pure adoration on Emmett's face.
"You wanted to talk?" I brought his attention back to me and crossed my arms over my chest.
"I know that you don't want to hear my apologies Bella... and I know that a simple apology will never be enough to tell you just how sorry I am." he began and I nodded, he was right. An apology would never undo what he had done, what he had tried to do.
"I tried to take the life of our daughter. I betrayed you and I betrayed your decisions. I went against my marriage vows and did what I thought best for you without your consent. I was a fool and because of my selfish decision I may have lost you Bella and I know that I've lost our daughter. I know you will never be able to trust me with her and I understand why. I was given a gift... a miracle... and I ruined everything. And Bella, I am so much more than sorry for my actions." He was beginning to tremble and I worried that he may be on the verge of breaking down as Carlisle had the previous day. Turning my back towards the window I waited a moment while we both collected ourselves before I spoke again.
"I don't know if I can ever forgive you Edward... and I know for sure that I will never forget." I spoke firmly, thankful that my voice didn't crack as I said the words, my heart aching at his close proximity.
"I don't expect you to Bella." He paused briefly and then his voice changed slightly, "Which is why I wanted you to know that I've made provisions for you and Renesmee. Anything that she needs I want you to get her, anything that you need or that Charlie needs... feel free to get it. The account is in your name and if you need anything else just let Esme know and she'll get the message to me and I'll do whatever I can." I turned around and stared at him in disbelief, not understanding what he was telling me as he held out a hand with a shiny black card in it. "I know that this is nothing Bella... that it can never undo what I did. I know that you don't want me in your life or Renesmee's, but please accept this... this something. If it's all that I can do for her, I want to do it." His eyes were filled with venom and he looked past me again into the living room as he stood there, his hand out with the card still in it, waiting for me to take it.
"We don't need your money Edward." I said and took a deep breath, Edward's eyes snapping back up to my face.
"I don't know if I can forgive you Edward," I said again but this time continued before he could say anything else. "But she already has. She knows what happened, she remembers it all and she forgives you." I paused and tried to swallow back the tears again. "She doesn't need your money Edward... she needs you. She needs a father in her life, someone that she can trust and count on; someone who will listen to her and protect her. She needs you. And as much as I still hurt, am still angry... I don't want to keep what she needs from her." I said quietly and watched as his brow furrowed in confusion.
"What are you saying Bella?" he nearly growled out but I wasn't afraid of him, I knew that I had taken him by surprise with my words.
"I'm not going to keep her from you anymore Edward." I said again and saw his eyes light up at my words before his face fell again. "Please don't play with my emotions Bella," he guarded his eyes as he looked at my face for any hint of a lie.
"I'm not saying that I trust you to keep her here without me, but I am willing to let you see her with me there, to spend time with her and get to know her." I said and this time his eyes stayed brighter.
"So I can..." he gestured towards the house and I nodded, following him as he moved at a slow human pace, glancing behind himself at me as though expecting me to order him to stop at any second.
As we opened the door, the room fell silent and everyone stared at us, looking for my approval of the situation before they allowed Edward any further in.
"It's fine. I said that he could see her." I said softly and Esme moved to pick her up from Alice's lap before the rest of the room began to clear out, leaving just Esme and Carlisle with us in the room.
"Let me take her Esme." I said and pulled my daughter to my chest, her back to me and her eyes wide as she took in Edward who was standing in front of me.
"Renesmee, this is Edward... your Daddy." I said softly into her ear and she reached out almost immediately her tiny arms too controlled for someone her size. Of course she knew who he was, she asked about him regularly and while I tried my best not to say anything negative in front of her, she knew what had happened; she had picked up enough to put it together and understand. But even still she had been asking to see him, telling me that she didn't blame him.
"Can... Can I?" Edward looked to me as Renesmee continued to reach out to him and I nodded hesitantly as he took her from my arms, his icy hands brushing against me as he pulled her gently from my grasp.
"Thank you Bella," he said just before her little hand reached out and touched his cheek, his face shocked as he saw into her mind for the first time.
"Uh... Bella?" Emmett's gruff voice startled me and I looked up to find him standing in front of me with Renesmee in his arms. I had been talking to Esme as the rest of the family came back and continued on like a normal day.
"What is it Emmett?" I asked and reached for my baby girl, pulling her to me. "I think... um... she showed me that she's hungry." His face looked absolutely disgusted and I saw why as Renesmee placed her hand on my arm and showed me her hunger, followed by it being quenched as she nursed, my own taste buds feeling the way my milk tasted to her. I couldn't help it, it was the little bit of humour that I needed and I burst out laughing as Emmett continued to look at me with that same look on his face, the rest of the room turning to see what was going on.
"She just... she showed him... what... nursing... tastes... like..." I gasped out between my laughter and he rolled his eyes at me, muttering something about 'not funny', and 'gross', before crossing the room to sit with a snickering Rosalie.
Once she was satisfied I pulled my cell phone out of my pocket, sending a quick message to Charlie and asking him to come and get us.
Overall, the day had been a success and had gone much smoother than I had imagined. And while I still hadn't forgiven them for their parts in what had happened, I felt like things might one day be alright between the family and I. The only one I wasn't completely sure about being Edward. But as the days continued to pass and he became a permanent fixture in my life again, coming by my Dad's house to visit every day and taking us to their house a couple of times a week, I could feel my heart very slowly beginning to heal.
When Renesmee reached three months old, we held a small party at the Cullen house, deciding to celebrate her birth more frequently as she grew, still not entirely sure how long we had with her. At three months old Ness was already the size of a small one year old, walking on her own and eating a solid diet. She had been asking Edward recently if he would take her hunting and he had been holding her off until I gave him the okay.
At some point after her three month party I noticed Edward and I starting to grow closer again. My heart still wasn't completely healed and there were still moments where I began to distrust his actions but I also couldn't help liking it when he grabbed my hand to hold while taking a walk along the Cullen property, or when my body leaned into him while we watched movies with our daughter.
"Can we talk for a minute Bella?" Edward looked unusually worried as he came into the Cullen living room.
"Why don't you go outside with Uncle Jasper and Uncle Emmett for a little while?" I said to Nessie who was currently sitting on the floor in front of me, a small book in her hands. She didn't ask questions for which I was grateful and just stood up and walked to the back door where Emmett was waiting for her with her jacket and boots after hearing my suggestion.
"What is it Edward?" I asked, worried that something had come up in their non-stop research into what Nessie was... how long she had.
"It's nothing bad." He assured me quickly, most likely picking up on my anxiety, "I was just... I was hoping that you and Nessie would move back in with the rest of us." he said cautiously and I felt my breath hitch in my throat. I wasn't sure if I was ready for that. "That's not the only thing though Bella..." I braced myself for whatever he was going to say next. "We're going to have to move on soon. People are starting to ask questions about you and I... not only that but one of the neighbors has seen Ness with Charlie a couple of times now and they are getting suspicious." he said and I gulped, trying to get air in my lungs. I knew that one day the Cullens would have to move and I had assumed that when that day came that I would be going with them... I just didn't think it would be for a while yet.
"Let me take a day or two to think it over and I'll let you know... okay." I said carefully and I saw the disappointment on his face.
"We should head back home now anyways, Charlie will want to see Ness tonight. He hasn't seen her the past three days because of the overtime he's been working." I said and began to get up, Edward lending me his hand as I did and the same electric current passing through me at his touch.
"I'll take you home." Edward volunteered and I smiled at him to let him know that I wasn't angry or upset at the moment.
The ride back to Charlie's was quieter than normal, Nessie's normal chatter not filling the quiet space as she could sense something going on between Edward and I. When we arrived home though she was happy to see Charlie, having missed him the past few days while he had been working.
"Why don't you come in for a little while, stick around to tuck her into bed." I said as Edward watched her run into the house, his face as pained as it always was when he dropped us back off. He didn't hesitate to take me up on my offer, following me inside before I had the chance to change my mind.
After we had eaten dinner and Ness had been settled into her side of the bed in my room, Charlie excused himself to his room, his exhaustion clearly visible from the past couple of days.
"I should get back, the others will be wondering where I am." Edward said quietly as he stood by the door, but something changed, something pulled me to him. "Alice will tell them where you are." I said and grabbed his hand, pulling him back to the living room with me.
"You have to promise me that we'll still get to see my dad, get to keep him in our life." I said as we sat down and Edward looked at me in confusion. "If we move with you." I said slowly and I saw the small smile begin to form on his lips. "Of course Bella." he smiled wider as he said the words and I nodded my head. I knew this was the right thing for Nessie... but I was still confused about me.
"I still love you Edward." I bit my lip as my cheeks flushed brightly at my admission.
"Bella... I..."
"I know Edward... I know... and I think... I can finally move on from what happened." I swallowed and continued, "It's not going to be easy and I still have things that I need to work through... but I want... I want to try." I bit down on my lip a little bit harder this time, nervous about what I was about to do.
"I will always love you Bella." he said firmly and then I did it, I shifted my body so that I could crush my lips against his, taking him by surprise as he realized what I was doing and he finally began to kiss me back.
"Are you ready Love?" I turned and smiled at him to let him know I was almost ready, there was only one thing left for me to do.
"Dad?" I nudged his shoulder playfully as I held Renesmee on my hip. The small smile he gave me did nothing to cover up the hurt on his face as I reached over and wrapped my arm around him, pulling me into my side in an unusual show of affection.
"Love you Dad..." I could feel my eyes beginning to well up as Ness reached over and wrapped her arms around his neck, bringing herself over to him and holding tightly.
"You sure you're ready Bells?" it wasn't the first time that he had asked me since he had found out that we were leaving again – it had taken Charlie more than a little while to come around to the fact that I had forgiven Edward.
"Yeah Dad... I'm ready. It's time to put my family back together again. You know... there are police forces all over the country – you could always come with us you know..." It wasn't the first time I had put it out there and I knew already that he wasn't up for that, not yet at least.
"I know Bells... Just do me a favor and don't shut me out again." His voice was almost pleading, but his eyes demanding and I knew I would never shut him out again, not after everything he had seen and helped us with.
"I promise Dad... never again." The tears began to trickle down my cheek as I felt Edward come up behind me, his arm resting on my lower back as Renesmee continued to cling to my dad.
"I'll miss you Grandpa." Her little voice squeaked out from his neck and my dad closed his eyes, holding her tighter against him as her hand came up and found his cheek.
"You little miss, had better call me every day... understand?" He tried to make his voice light, but as he spoke it cracked and gave him away. She nodded her head and then pulled back again, reaching out towards Edward as I pulled my dad in for one last hug.
"Thank you Dad... for everything." I whispered as he hugged me back. "Love you Bells – always have, always will." He choked out and then pulled back, reaching out quickly and shaking Edward's hand – muttering something about taking care of his girls before turning and returning inside to the house.
"Come on Love," Edward kissed my forehead and wrapped his arm around me, leading me to his car as I turned my head and looked back at the familiar white house. As he helped Renesmee into her car seat and buckled her in, I got in the passenger seat and kept my eyes glued to the house. Just as we backed out of the driveway and began the drive towards our new home I saw one of the curtains in the living room pull back, my dad's face barely visible and my heart almost broke at his expression.
A/N: I left the ending open on this as I do have a sequel already written although I'm unsure whether or not I will ever post it at this point.