Perfection Chapter 1: Flashbacks, a criminal minds fanfic

Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds. It is the property of Mark R. Gordon and CBS. I do, however, own the character Sarah Riverson and any original characters involved in her past. Not that I'll ever make any money from that…

Author's Note: This story will contain far more mature content than "Reid's Miracle" (I'm referring to swearing, sexual references, and other adult topics involving the crimes). There are also references to capital punishment. Knowing this is a sensitive topic, I just wanted to state out right that I'm not using my opinion on that topic in one way or another in this story. I'm simply going by what probably would have occurred based on state policy. I don't know if anyone would have commented/flamed in reference to that, but I figured I'd get it out the way.

On a much lighter note, I was a little shall we say hyper when writing this since I was free from school for a week. Therefore, I decided to have a little fun when writing (that and I thought it'd keep the mood a little light for you, the readers, during some of the darker chapters). Hidden in almost every chapter will be a quote from either a movie, song, or TV show. I tried to not make them overly obvious for those not really interested, but I think it's amusing. For the person(s) that correctly identify the most there will be a little prize at the end of the story. Nothing huge, but I thought this could be fun. Next to my name in each chapter I'll tell you the category to make it a little easier. You can either comment on them in your review or send me a private message. I won't reveal the answers until the final chapter, so feel free to wait until one of the last chapters to submit answers.

Anywho, that's a long enough author's note, don't you think? On with part two of Sarah Riverson series! Enjoy!

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Perfection

Chapter One: Flashbacks

By Ann Parker (None)

Jonas Salk once said, "I have had dreams and I have had nightmares, but I have conquered my nightmares because of my dreams."

"Reid, are you going to play or watch your girlfriend sleep?" Morgan's question snapped Reid out of his daze. He had been watching Sarah sleep in the chair next to him, curled up in his brown sweater that she claimed as her own a few months ago. He was just glad she seemed to be getting some rest.

"Oh sorry. Gin," he replied, setting down his cards. Groans could be heard from Morgan and Emily. JJ was reading a book at the other end of the plane and Gideon and Hotch were talking among themselves.

"That's it, you're kicked out of the game," Morgan stated, picking up the cards. Reid laughed slightly and went back to looking at the sleeping form next to him. She had fallen asleep shortly after playing her song for the case. Not too long after joining them in their travels, she began to pick a song out of her music collection that fit the mood. It was her personal coping method and the others enjoyed listening to the songs. Some ended on a happy note, others a sad one, but either way it seemed to help reflect on what had just happened in whatever city they were just in.

It had been about six months since she had joined the team, not to mention changed his life, and everything had been going relatively smoothly. After about a month of training and passing her qualifications she had joined them in traveling to their cases, which was when the music had started. The team quickly learned that she had remarkable insight on any case involving abuse and had a knack for talking to and obtaining information from young children and teenagers.

That had been a crucial aspect of the case they were on their way back from in St. Paul. Their unsub had been abducting 14 year old girls, raping them, and leaving their bodies in a small forested area nearby. They were having a hard time catching the guy until some local hunters found his latest victim before she died from exposure to the elements. Sarah had been the only one that could get her to talk and describe the man. After that, they quickly had him in custody and closed the case. This was why she chose "A Voice Within" by Christina Aguilera, fitting as usual.

By all accounts it should have been another day on the job for them. Unfortunately for Sarah, and thus Reid, it had triggered her flashbacks. He still wasn't sure if the case was the actual cause of the flashbacks though. She had seemed upset after reading a piece of mail right before they headed to the office the morning they were sent to Minnesota.

Either way, they had come back full force. They were just fortunate that due to the odd number on their team, Sarah had gotten her own room at the local hotel. He knew she wouldn't have wanted to explain to JJ or Emily why she had woken up screaming three nights in a row. Never mind the fact that she also got sick two of the nights. After the first night, he had snuck into her room so she wasn't alone. He had been able to calm her down, but he knew she hadn't gotten much sleep. Neither had he, frankly, but he didn't really care about that at the moment. This had been the first time that she had any real problems since starting at the BAU. She had a few nightmares, but then again, who hadn't? This had been the only time she had actual flashbacks and it worried him. The fact that she got sick, even though she was positive it was just something she ate, bothered him even more.

"Thinking about how to give her that piece of jewelry?" Reid's head snapped up to see Gideon sitting across from him. He hadn't even notice Emily and Morgan wonder over by JJ and the older man take over Morgan's seat. Reid looked back over at Sarah and sighed.

"Not exactly. I haven't even had time to think about that," he replied. It had been almost two months since Gideon had given Reid his great grandmother's ring to give to Sarah. Reid refused to accept it at first, stating he could buy a new one. But Gideon insisted, telling him how it was a family air loom and he couldn't think of any other two people he'd rather give it to. He saw Reid and Sarah as his adopted son and daughter and wanted them to have it. He had already given his real son, Steven, a ring from the other side of his family. After his speech, Reid couldn't refuse any longer and took the ring. It had been figuratively been burning a hole in his pocket, or more appropriately his messenger bag, ever since. He hadn't quite built up the courage to ask her just yet. He knew he wanted to, but for once in his life the words to do so had escaped him.

He noticed out of the corner of his eye that Gideon was studying him, attempting to interpret what he had just said. He was fairly certain that Gideon had noticed a change in her demeanor during the case and he debated on whether or not to just tell him about her flashbacks and getting sick. As much as he had hated Morgan for a while, he had been right to Gideon about his nightmares a while back. Should he do the same for her?

Only he didn't have to because at that moment Sarah began to stir in her sleep. He could see the pain in her face and tell she was about to scream. He quickly reached over and shook her slightly, just enough for her eyes to snap open. She locked eye contact with him and all he did was nod. Without a word she moved so she was sitting sideways in his lap, her legs hanging into the seat she had just occupied. She buried her head into his chest, covering her face with the sweater; aware enough to know the team would be looking. They didn't need to see her tears. Reid kissed her forehead and held her, rubbing circles on her back. He was afraid this was going to happen.

"I had a bad feeling that was what was going on," Gideon sighed and Reid looked into his eyes. "How long?" Reid could see the rest of the team watching from a distance and he felt Sarah let out a shaky breath against his neck. It was his turn to be the strong one.

"Since we landed in St. Paul," he whispered. Gideon nodded.

"I think she needs a break. Unless we get an urgent case, I don't want to see either of you in the office for the next few days. Paperwork can wait," he ordered. Just then Sarah removed the sweater from her face and turned to look at her boss/father-figure. She separated herself slightly from Reid in the process.

"I can do my job Jason," she countered. Reid bit back a small chuckle. He knew Gideon was right, but he also knew she was going to fight him on it. She didn't want the others to see her as weak. They were a little so similar with that character trait. Only the two men in her close proximity had ever seen her vulnerable side. Well, if you ignore that day in the hospital when they learned of her bout with drugs.

"Don't argue with me, Sarah," Gideon retorted. Reid watched as the two stared at each other. If it hadn't been about a serious topic, it would have down right comical. The team had noticed shortly after she joined them that she had no problem standing up to Gideon, something none of the rest of them except for maybe Hotch would attempt. Finally Sarah sighed, realizing that she wasn't going to win.

"Fine, dad," she replied with some emphasize on the last word. She smiled slightly at Gideon, knowing he was only trying to help her. Gideon chuckled slightly and the tension that had been building on the small aircraft was lifted.

"Always with the wise cracks," he sighed.

"You know that's why you love me," she stated. That made everyone slightly laugh. Gideon shook his head and stood up, kissing the top of her head.

"That's just one of the many reasons," he whispered. "Now get some sleep. Reid appears to be a good pillow for you." Reid smiled at that comment and noticed Sarah look back at him.

"The best kind, actually," she replied. Reid kissed her softly on the lips and she snuggled up against him afterwards, her forehead touching the side of his neck. "Love you," she breathed against his skin.

"Love you too," he whispered. "I'll wake you when we're about to land." He felt her slightly nod, already starting to drift off. He hoped that she'd get at least an hour of peaceful sleep this time.