Disclaimer: I do not own DBZ or any of the characters...I wish...but oh well

The Calling

RING RING
"Vegeta could you answer the phone!" Bulma yelled from the kitchen.
"Whatever.."
"Thank you!"
"What?" He asked into the phone.
Silence…
"Who is this?"
Silence…
"…If you don't answer I will tear you-"
"Vegeta…" said a shaky voice on the phone.
"Kakorot, what do you want?"
"Vegeta...there…there..."
"…Get on with it!"
"There's a spider on my cookie jar!"
Vegeta stood there with a blank look on his face.
"A what!"
"A…a spider on my cookie jar. It…it won't leave. I tried to ask it…bribe it, but it just won't move."
"..."
"Vegeta, are you still there?"
"YOU CALLED ME BECAUSE THERE IS A FUCKING SPIDER ON YOUR FUCKING COOKIE JAR?"
"(sniff)Yes…but it's not just any spider, Vegeta, it's a mean spider."
"…(angry sigh) And what do you want me to do about this? Talk to it over the phone!"
"Would you?"
"What the hell is wrong with you!"
"Well I do have a sore thumb.."
"…NOT THAT YOU IDOIT! I mean, why don't you just kill it?"
Silence

" (angry sigh) Kakorot I didn't mean.."
"YOU EVIL GERK HOW COULD YOU SAY SUCH A THING!"
"Kakorot… shut the hell up. Now why don't you just leave the room for an hour or two. And when you come back it should be gone."
"I can't."
"And why not!"
"Because I don't want the spider to eat my cookies..."
Silence
"Vegeta, can you hear me?"
"Yes, I CAN! The damn spider will not eat your fucking cookies.."
"How do you know that? Hm? You're not some kind of spider expert last time I checked!"
"Kakorot are you brain dead?"
"Well Chi-Chi said I was one time. Does that mean I am?"
"I hate you."
"(sniff) Well I love you.."
"If you say that one more time I will hang-up and kill you the next time I see you."
"…ok..."
"Now, just leave the room and it will leave the cookie jar."
"But-"
"NO FUCKING BUTS!"
"…okay." Goku walked into his living room. "Okay."
"Now just wait a fucking hour and it should be gone."
"Okay."
"Good, now I'm hanging-up, don't call me again for something like this."
"Okay..."
Vegeta hung-up and went to go train.

---One Hour Later---

Ring Ring
Vegeta looked around no one else was around. "Damit…Hello?"
"VEGETA!"
"What Kakorot!"
"It's still there!"
"Grr…I thought I told you to not call me about this again!"
"I know, but…but I'm scared."
"WHAT, YOU'RE SCARED OF A TINY SPIDER!"
"No Vegeta, it's a big, black scary spider.."
"#$$&!"
"Are you mad at me?"
"..."
"Vegeta, Vegeta did you have a heart attack! I told you with that anger of yours, you-"
"I'm not dead you moron!"
"Oh, that's good."
"Now this is the only god damned advice I'm giving you."
"You already gave me some advice before..."
"FINE! This is the last piece of advice I'm giving you."
"Okay..."
"You can either wait for your wife to come home or you can kill the damned spider."
Silence

Vegeta rolled his eyes.
"You know Vegeta you shouldn't call people names…it's not nice."
"What the fuck, are you even listening to me!"
"Yes…but you should really think about taking some anger management classes."
"Go to hell."
"No thank, I've already been there. It's not a very nice place."
"You know what?"
"What?"
"I don't care what the fuck happens to you or the spider! Just leave me the hell alone!"
"But Vegeta you're the only person who understands..."
"Understands what?"
"Me..."
"…NO ONE UNDERSTANDS YOU KAKOROT! NOT EVEN ME! …Now I'm hanging up!"
"NO!"
"WHAT NOW?"
"Don't leave me alone with that spider, he keeps watching me!"
"THAT'S BECAUSE YOU'RE A BIG BLUE AND ORANGE IDOIT!"
"How did you know I was wearing my gee?"
"BECAUSE YOU ALWAYS FUCKING WEAR THAT!"
"Well you always wear blue spandex! ...Why do you wear blue spandex?" Goku said in a suspicious voice.
"…BECAUSE THAT IS PART OF SAIYAN ARMOR!"
"Really? …Why do you still wear it then? You don't even wear the armor part." Goku said in the same suspicious voice.
"KAKOROT, YOU'RE GOING OFF SUBJECT!"
"Really? Or do you just not want to tell me why you wear spandex all the time.."
"I wear other things than spandex!" At this point Bulma had walked in. Vegeta looked up at her; she just stared at him in an odd way. "I'm talking to Kakorot.."
"O…kay." And she left with a confused look on her face.
"AHHHHHHH!"
"What now, Kakorot?"
"It moved..."
"What moved?"
"The spider, it moved!"
"Ok…and what do you want me to do?"
"Come over and put it outside for me."
"No way, no way in hell would I come over and take a stupid spider outside for you!"
"Why?"
"WHY! BECAUSE YOU CAN DO IT YOURSELF, SHIT FOR BRAINS!"
"(sniff) You don't have to yell."
"Will you leave me the fuck alone!"
"Why?"
"Because…it's none of your business!"
"Oooh…Veggie." Goku said a teasing voice.
"What!"
"Is today Friday already?"
CLICK
"Vegeta? ...Veeeggggeeetttttaaaaaaaaaa? Are you still there? Helllooooooooooooooooooo!"

End