Disclaimer: I do not own the copyrights to Neon Genesis Evangelion, Fight Club or any of the songs that are used in this story. All copyrights belong to their respective owners.

Readers Note: Recently, I had to take down my fan fics because of a small HTML corruption. This is a re-post

Neon Genesis

EVANGELION

E

A small Fan Fiction series by

Turles

Episode: Unknown 01

Tyler Durden

E

My name is Shinji Ikari, and this is the story of Fight Club. I think all of this, fight club, my growth, and Tyler. All of this started with a trip; I was to go to Tokyo-2 strictly on business. My business is I'm an Eva pilot and my mission is to kill the angels. The Eva that I pilot is a giant robot and I am the Third Child, even though I didn't exactly choose it. A man once said that it was my destiny, my talent. Then again, it doesn't matter to me; I just do what I'm asked to.

Let me tell you about Tokyo-3, my home. At least Tokyo-3 has become my home, my home used to be with a teacher of mine. But then I received a call from my father to come to Tokyo-3 it was there I met Captain Misato Katsuragi. Probably the most exhibitionist person I have ever met in my life and the sloppiest on top of that. Although she isn't a bad person, she was one of these people that in her home she's one person and when she's at work she's someone completely different, almost as if she has split personalities.

Tokyo-3 was like a fortress, its buildings would sink into the ground at a certain time and then they would rise up as if they were growing. When they would sink in they would go into an underground cavern, a GeoFront as they're called. Misato once told me that it's a fortress built to withstand the ages, this is Tokyo-3 and it's the city I protected.

After living in this place for a while and piloting the Eva I became settled into this "new lifestyle". Although I have met some interesting people, such as the Nerv (the organization that uses the Eva's) Doctor Ritsuko Akagi. In my opinion she's one of these people who loves their work. Although there's nothing wrong with that, but that's mostly all she does. One could say that she's not very adept at living. The same could be said with my co-worker and fellow Eva Pilot Rei Ayanami, the First Child.

She is another odd character, Rei. She's bland, like a white sheet of paper that hasn't been written on or drawn on just yet. At least that's what her personality is like, but her piloting skills are good, even though her Eva has a tendency to go berserk every so often.

Then there's my other roommate, Asuka Langley Souryu. She's… pretty fiery and hot headed. She also pilots an Eva as well, she's the Second Child, but she only pilots the Eva for recognition as if the Eva would help her win a popularity contest among our generation. She always yells and shouts at me for out-staging her. Personally I think she's a bitch, if I wanted her kind of abuse I would have stayed with my dad.

Last of all, my father, one of the last people that I want to think about.

But I'll continue on how I met Tyler. I was going to Tokyo-2 on business, basically I was sent there for a special kind of test. The scientists there wanted to know why my Synchronization ratio was so high when I first came to Nerv and Tokyo-3. Almost like physiologists trying to find out where genius comes from. What can I say? At least it will help me get away from Tokyo-3 and from Asuka and my father.

I don't want to talk about what went on with those scientists and this special Synchronization test. I'd much rather get to how I met Tyler.

While I was in Tokyo-2 the tests were completed a day early, the scientists there thought that they got all that they needed. So I thought I'd head on down to the beach, get a tan while I'm here. At least it would give me a chance to relax a little bit before going back to the hell of piloting the Eva, facing my dad, and Asuka. Just allow me to enjoy myself.

While I was lying on the beach I heard a voice call from my left. I sat up and I saw a man, who looked a little into his late teens perhaps his early twenties. He seemed to be pretty muscular from what I could see in his defined muscles. He called to me, and he wanted to know something.

"Do you know what time it is?" He asked me

I looked at my watch and I told him, "It's 3:29."

"Thank you."

I watched him and it looked as though he was making something in the sand. I was a little bit curious as to what he was doing. Although I didn't dwell too much on the why he asked me what time it was. But I stood and saw what he was making he was making a Yin-Yang in the sand. One part of it he was scratching and raking his fingers through the sand to give a dark shade in it. While the other he left untouched and when he was done he simply sat in the center of the Yin-Yang in a lotus position as if was calming his own spirit to ponder the meaning's of life, which is something I wish I could do for my own self worth.

I watched this man who asked me the time with a certain interest. But I dropped it thinking that he was a stranger and I don't normally start conversations with strangers, that part's usually up to them when I'm involved. So I went back to lying down on the ground and getting my tan.

E

I wake up on the plane back to Tokyo-3. And I find sitting next to me is the man I met on the beach. He's reading the emergency card that is stored in the seat pocket. He looks at it and reads it out loud to himself. I notice that he's wearing a leather bomber's jacket with a white button-up dress shirt inside it. And he's wearing a pair of jeans that look as though they've been pretty well worn.

"If you feel that you are unable to do these duties." He reads out loud, "Ask the stewardess to reseat you. That's a lot of responsibility."

He turns his head towards me. He smiles. He has black hair and brown eyes and tan skin, probably from being on the beach the day he asked me what time it was.

"Do you know why they put oxygen masks on airplanes?" He asks me

"To breath?" I answer

"Partially," he tells me, "But truly, oxygen gets you high. In such a panicked state with the oxygen mask on you, you take panicked breaths. You become docile and you accept your fate." He shows me the card and points at the people depicted on it. "Look, their faces are docile and serene. Like Hindu cows. Do you want to switch seats?"

"No." I shake my head, "I don't think I can do that."
"Alright." He says as he sits back

"What do you do?" I ask him

He looks at me with an odd look in his eye, "Why do you want to know?" He asks, "So you can pretend that you're interested?"

"No, I'm just curious."

He shrugs and he reaches for his briefcase that he stored under the seat in front of him. It's a brown leather briefcase and he clicks it open.

"Soap." He says, "I make and I sell soap. The yardstick of civilization."
I take a peek inside his briefcase and I see bars of soap that look like pink and white marble bars. Each of them wrapped in twine thread and underneath them is a card. He pulls out a card from one of the holders in the case and hands it to me.

This is how I met Tyler Durden.

The card reads this

Tyler Durden

Paperstreet Soap Company

1123 Yuki St.

Tokyo-3

"You work in Tokyo-3?" I ask

"Sure." He smiles as he leans back in his seat.

"How do you make soap?" I ask him, because it is something that I was wondering about.

"Simple." He smiles, "You just need fat and lye and you can make soap."

It's at this point I decide to introduce myself, I thought that it might just be rude not to. Since he's already shown me what he does and what his name is.

"I'm Shinji Ikari." I introduce myself

"The Eva Pilot."

"How did you know that?" I ask him, I'm a bit surprised that he would know that even though Nerv has this tendency to keep things a secret.

"I watch the news." He says

E

I'm back home in the small condo where I live with Misato and Asuka. Of course Misato greets me as I walk through the door as she said when I first came here. I see Misato's face, her 30-something face with its smile that was only shown this way around home.

"I'm home," I say.

"Welcome home." She says

I head to my little cramped room with its small bed and my stuff still in their boxes. I used to have the room down the hall, until Asuka came along and took it from me. Now that I think about it, she's no different that the other takers that have come before her.

I simply lay on my bed and look up at the unfamiliar ceiling, thinking about how things have turned out. It's ironic that I've been in this city for a few months and still this ceiling is unfamiliar to me, just like everything else here.

I hear Asuka come into my room and she starts up again.

"You're home." She says

Here I am again, back to the abuse that I was getting used to not having while I was on the beach.

"Yeah." I say still looking up at the unfamiliar ceiling, I don't want to say anything more than that to her. Otherwise she'll go off on her tangents like a firework that's out of control. And that is when she goes from zero to super bitch in .05 seconds. But then it was inevitable, just by saying yeah to her made her go off.

"I'm not too important for you to talk to is that it Third Child?" She says

I say nothing,

"You think your all that much better than me that you don't have to talk to me is that it?"

I look at her and see her closing her eyes and sticking her nose up into the air, clearly showing her own arrogance like some kind of pathetic peacock. So I got out of my bed and I left the condo. I just wanted to get out of there, out of that condo where I have to put up with Asuka and her antics about me out-staging her. I left the condo without even saying why or where I was going. Although Asuka didn't notice she was enjoying herself too much by rambling. Misato on the other hand I found out was already asleep from so much beer.

If you were to ask me now, I don't know why I thought about Tyler. Something compelled me to go out and talk with him for some reason or another. I went to the phone on the corner and I reached into my pocket and pulled out the business card that read Paperstreet Soap Company. And I found the number at the bottom and I called him.

I heard the phone ring and I heard someone pick up. The next sound I heard was the sound of someone munching on chips.

"Hello?" The voice of Tyler asked

"Tyler?" I ask

"Who is this?"

"This is, Shinji Ikari. The Eva pilot, we met on the plane."

"Oh yeah." He says remembering me, "What can I do for you?"

"Can we meet somewhere?"

E

Tyler and I decide to meet at a small Raman noodle stand somewhere in the city. I tell him some of the reasons why I called him and why we were sitting with each other at this small stand. I tell him mostly it's because of Asuka.

"Don't tell me you slept with her." Tyler says

"No." I say startled, "Why would I?"

"Sorry." Tyler says as he eats the noodles, "Then again from what you've told me about her, I'm not sure why anyone would want to."

"Yeah. But she's always bitching and moaning about how either I or Ayanami do better than her or bail her out of situations."
As Tyler's slurping the noodles, he wipes his mouth and says to me, "It could be worse."

"How?" I ask him

"Well." He starts, "That Asuka bitch your living with could cut your penis off while your asleep and then toss it out the window of a moving car."

The idea of this happening did strike me as both frightening and profound. I shrug and simply say, "You're right."

We both finish our noodles and of course I didn't bring my wallet so Tyler picked up the tab on this small dinner, but then again I wasn't too hungry because I ate a little bit of that Chicken Cordon Blue hobby kit that was on the plane.

As we finished Tyler looks at me and asks me a question; "Do you know what a dufe is?"

I hadn't the slightest idea of what he was talking about so I spoke the truth, "No."

"It's a blanket." He explains

But I listened with interest because if this will be as profound as the idea of things could be worse then I'll listen.

"But is it really important that guys like you and me know what a dufe is, in the hunter-gatherer sense of the word? No. So what are we?"

I shrug and think about my economics class, "Consumers?"

"Exactly." Tyler nods, "We're consumers, byproducts of a society lifestyle. The Second Impact, the Angels, murder, crime, and poverty. These things don't concern me. What truly concerns me are Celebrity Magazines, television with 500 channels and not one that interests you, models telling you how you should look, and some guys name on my underwear. Calvin Klein, Playboy, Viagra, Prozac."

"Martha Stewart?" I ask

"Fuck Martha Stewart." He says to me, "Martha like all the other stuff it's going down like society after the Second Impact. So I say, hell with it all. May I never be content or complete, because the things you own end up owning you."

Tyler's words sounded like music to my ears, for so long I wanted to meet someone like him, someone who can help me. Help me Tyler. Deliver me from my need to be approved by everyone, deliver me from Asuka and my father.

We walk away from the Ramon noodle stand and we find ourselves in the parking lot of a small time bar. I suddenly ask him something else about what he does.

"What else do you do, other than make soap?" I ask

"I have a part time job as a projectionist. You see when you go to the theater and watch a movie you'll see these little dots come up into the right hand corner of the screen. In the industry we call them cigarette burns, one's a fifteen-minute warning the next is a five minute warning. That's the cue for the projectionist to change the reels. So that way when things change over the audience has no clue what's going on. And why would anyone want this shit job?"

"Why?" I ask him

We stop in the middle of the parking lot; there are no cars or people, just I and he under the sodium and mercury vapor lamps of the city.

"Cause it helps me do some interesting things. Like splicing single frames of porno movies into family films. Such as when you see the courageous hero getting the girl in the G-rated movie, that's when you'll see my work. Nobody knows they saw it but they did, nice big cock and of course T&A. Not even a humming bird could catch me at work."

He smiles, I presume he's thinking about one of those times that he's done this. I can imagine him laughing as he watches the audience try to figure out what in the hell they just saw on the screen.

I look at my watch, "I think I should get back home." I say

"Really?" He says, "You really want to go back to that? A 30-year old woman that drinks beer in the morning and a 14-year-old bitch who yells at you day in and day out? Do you really want to go back to that?"

I look at my shoes, "No."

"Then stay at my place."

"Is it a problem?" I ask him

"Is it a problem for you to ask?"

I pause, then I say, "No."

"Than it's alright by me."

"Thanks." I say

We are about to continue on our walk to his house on Yuki street, but then he stops.

"I have a favor to ask you, Shinji." He says

"What?"

"I want you to hit me as hard as you can."

"What?"

"I want you to hit me as hard as you can."

E

There are no Angel attacks so far, so I'm at school and going through my classes but one of my classmate's notices something about my face. The classmate's name is Toji Suzahara, at first when I came here to Tokyo-3 he hated me for his sisters' injury because of my Eva. But somehow he saw how hard I fight in the Eva. And that is how we became "friends".

He notices something about me. Thankfully it's break time and he can talk to me.

"Hey, Shinji." He says

I'm working on something that Tyler asked me to work on.

"Yeah?" I ask

"What happened to your face?"

I reach up to feel the swelling in the side of my face where Tyler hit me. That is what he asked me, he wanted me to hit him as hard as I could and I did. Then he hit me and that is where it first landed in the left side of my face. I can feel the bruises where he hit me in my sides and my arms. But there is only one bruise on my face and that's the one that Toji notices.

"Nothing happened." I tell him

"Don't lie to me." He says, "I know when someone's been in a fight and it looks like you've been in one. Did that bitch beat you up?"

"I HEARD THAT!" Asuka yells from the other side of the room

"No, it wasn't her." I tell Toji, "It's nothing."

Then he notices my shirt, "Is that blood?" He asks

I look at the blood on my white shirt and remember when I got a bloody nose from the fight Tyler and I had.

"Don't worry." I say, "It's mine."

Toji doesn't say anything else, he simply sits down and no one talks to me for the rest of the day at school. Not even Asuka bugs me, but she likes to yell at me for not doing some small detail in making the lunches for both of us. If that's the case then it will be a good day. Then again, this is probably the last day of school for a while, because summer will begin.

What happened between Tyler and me was, as he liked to call it, a first step towards enlightenment. He told me that there are meditative properties to fighting, and some say that when you fight you can find the answers to your own problems. He liked to put it this way, fighting helps you come to a certain state of mind in which you can find the answers.

It was then he asked me a question, Would you like to find your answers, Shinji Ikari?

I told him yes. I was sick of all of this; being an Eva pilot, the abuse, and my father. All of it, I can't stand any of it.

I thought it was going to be a quiet day, that is until Asuka came up to me towards the end of school during clean up.

"Why didn't you come home last night?" She asks, I'm not sure from the tone in her voice whether she just wanted an answer or if she was concerned for my well being.

"Why does that matter?" I ask her while I'm going back to cleaning

"It matters because Misato wants to know."

"Oh." I say, "For a moment I thought you were concerned about me."

I simply go back to cleaning and ignore her nagging questions. That is until someone asks her to come and help her with some kind of cleaning job. Now I can be left alone to think about the fight, I can feel the throb in my face and my sides from the fight I had.

We fought underneath the bluish and yellowish light of the sodium and mercury vapor lamps in the night of Tokyo-3. He asked me to hit him as hard as I could, but I was reluctant at first. I didn't know if he really wanted it or whether he was just joking with me.

"Why not?" He asked me, "I don't want to die without any scars. So come on."

I drew back my fist and it landed right in his stomach and he was bending over in pain.

"Mother fucker!" He cursed, "You hit me right in my stomach. And I just ate you son of a bitch!"

"God, I'm sorry." I said

"No, it's perfect."

He then drew back his fist and it landed in my face. At first all I could feel was a hard thump that was shaped like Tyler's fist against my face. In the first few seconds it feels like a deep impression in my left cheek. But then the pain began; it began to feel like it was on fire. Like someone had set a grease fire on my cheek. I cupped both my hands against my face and held the wound and wishing for a piece of raw steak to cool it off. But Tyler came to me and asked me if I was all right.

"Yeah." I said, "That was great."

It's true it felt great, it felt like such a rush. It didn't feel like those slaps I got from Ayanami or Asuka, but it truly felt like a rush from truly fighting another person. This is what I've been missing out on.

"Shall we continue?" Tyler asked me

"Hell yes." I said

And we continued to fight, hitting each other in our sides and blocking each other's punches with our forearms. That is the cause for these sore feelings and bruises in my sides and arms.

I was working on a set of rules for fights each night Tyler and I "went at it" as he called it. Basically he put me in charge of making the rules for a fight to make sure that no fight will be unfair in anyway. I haven't finished making up the rules, so I'll finish that when I get home. That is if I won't have to endure more abuse from Asuka or nagging from Misato.

I should tell you what the place that I stayed at was like. Tyler's home, it was pretty bad. The place looked like it needed to be torn down. The door's hinges were broken off from when whoever kicked it in. And inside it looked like anyone of the floorboards could cave in at any moment. The stairwell looked as thought it was about to collapse. Anywhere you looked there were rusty nails or pieces of wood sticking out to catch onto your shirt. When you would turn one light on in the house you had to turn another one off. Tyler told me that whenever it rained you had to turn off the power. The wood swells and expanded whenever it rained.

While I was there spending the night I found something. Something that did interest me and what has shaped me through this part of my life. I found a stack of articles written by organs in the first person. "I am Jack's Medulla Oblongata. I am Jill's Nipple. I am Jack's Colon."

I told this to Tyler while I was walking around the room pacing and thinking.

"What are you reading?" He asks me

I tell him about these articles, and he makes a comment on the "I am Jack's Colon."

"I get cancer." He smiles, "I kill Jack."

That is where I spent the night on a smelly mattress that would make the slightest noise in its springs whenever I moved. The mattress smells of sweat and beer. I endure it by looking up at yet another unfamiliar ceiling. Has this life of mine (with the Eva, Misato, and Asuka) was it a dream? Had I been sleeping? Or is this the reality I wanted to wake up to.

Only in Tyler will I find some kind of salvation.

To be continued…

Author's Notes: I wrote this story after I saw a small music video that is posted on animemusicvideos.org, it was by the studio called, "Nightowl Studios", who made a music video about Evangelion set to the song from Fight Club called "This is your Life". When I heard those words in Fight Club, I had a thought, "If anyone in all of Anime needs Fight Club, it is definitely Shinji Ikari." So I watched the movie and read the book to get an idea of what to do as well as how it is written and I started and this is the result. I hope that other readers will enjoy this. If you like Fight Club and Evangelion then this is the fic for you.