The Joy of Loving and Losing You
You were never my end all
But that slim hope, that slim chance
I wanted what you could not offer
My desires and needs were put first when we met
But only now do I see my folly
You needed someone better
I let my thoughts analysis our interactions
But I should have been last
You were too deeply hurt
It's too late for anything
But maybe just maybe you'll remember,
the friendship we had together
For now I will remember,
The joy of loving you
And perhaps when my strength returns,
I'll remember the joy of losing you
A New Ache
Constriction of the heart
The slight drop of the stomach
A pressure on the lungs
It's almost as if a person were
strumming strings over my chest.
Is this what heartbreak is?
How It Should Be
You before me
Don't you see
Love before self
No selfishness involved
Your smile, before mine
Let me make you shine
I'll not only be a sylph
Instead I wish to help you be resolved
Your heart revered
While mine perseveres
This is how it should be
This is how it wasn't
Blinded By
Our depression
My selfishness
Your hurt
Uncertainty
Fear
Rejection
Anxiousness
Our studies
The world
Finally mutual confusion
What We'll Never Share
I'll never know your comforting touch
You'll never know my special smile just for you
We'll never share ourselves together
Letting Go
Today I couldn't stop crying
Nothing helped to ease the pain
I tried to sleep but I couldn't
I had to drown you out
Every couple I see reminds me
of what we could have had
But alas that isn't what was planned
Did I really love you?
I'm not even sure what love is
Since you need to get away
All I can do is help you leave
Selfishly I want you here with me
But I know you will never grow
So here I am packing your bags
This is what is best for you
Where you can find peace,
I cannot follow
You need something else
And I need closure
Leave with your head held high
I'll be waiting,
Waiting until I can see you healed
-CSW
These are just a collection of poems I've written as I process a relationship I will lose. Hopefully once semester ends and I've had time to heal I'll be able to get back to writing fanfic, for now I hope you enjoyed a bit of my unprofessional poetry. -CSW