I walked outside of the house and into the night. Alice was drunk and saying things that she didn't mean again. But I wasn't in the mood to let it bounce off today. "Shut up Bella! Just because you can't just go up to Edward and tell him the truth doesn't mean we're all terrified!"

Stupid Alice. Stupid me for telling her the Edward thing.

I couldn't believe she'd just blown everything. I'd liked him since last summer at his parent's beach house. One night we were sitting by a campfire on the beach and I realized that Edward wasn't a little boy anymore. He was a man. And I loved him. And I had also told Alice. And now she had ripped the sheets right off.

I laughed it off though. "Alice! Maybe you've had like...a zillion too many." I said slowly. I took her upstairs and into her bedroom to sleep it off.

And now I was here, sitting by the pool. People were leaving finally. And I was all alone by the water, staring myself down. Edward Cullen had been my one major obsession for about 4 months now. He was calm and collected. He was Captain for the Var. Football team in the fall and captain for the Swim team in the winter, and he took a photography class as an extracurricular in the Spring.

He was funny and smart. He had the weirdest hobbies for a guy. Photography, cooking. But he wasn't even ashamed of it. His friends had him cook for them all the time and his Photography was featured on some billboards and ads for perfume.

Edward was perfect. And he was my best friend, and my older brother. He didn't drink even though my best friend and his new step-sister Alice threw parties at their house almost every weekend.

And I was in love with him. I loved everything about him and I couldn't help myself. And I had decided that it was okay to tell Alice that! What if he had heard? What if someone heard and told him? What if he decided I was a total freak!

I splashed the water with my hand.

"Angry?" I swirled around. There he was. This was so typical. I should have just left. I can't believe I forgot he lived here now.

"Hey Edward, Great party huh?" I tried to take the subject away from me.

"Sure, just like every party Alice throws when Dad and Esme are out of town." He laughed a little.

"Yeah. Is that weird now? Being Alice's step brother?" I asked. He shook his head.

"Me and Alice were already brother and sister. Like you and me."

Ugh, stuck in the "sister" zone. I probably should have listened to Alice when she advised me to stop hosting video game parties at my house and organizing games of flag football.

But those were the only times I was really close to Edward and we were having a good time without it being awkward. And I really loved playing Halo.

Edward interrupted my thoughts. He sat down next to me and moved my hair out of my face.

That was one of those things he did when he really wanted your attention. I gave it to him. I would give him anything.

"Alice got really drunk tonight." He said slowly. His hand moved to mine, playing with my fingers.

I nodded and gulped.

"And she said something."

I nodded again.

I was gonna shoot Alice as soon as she was sober enough to feel it; Right in the kneecaps.

"About you, and me."

I nodded again. He was still playing with my hand, tracing his fingers over my palm.

"And it bothered me. Because she said that there was something that you weren't telling me. She said that you weren't brave enough to tell me the truth. And I thought that you'd always told me the truth."

His fingers stopped moving. He was looking me straight in the eye now. Shit! What was I supposed to say to that? Oh yeah Edward, the truth is I've been in love with you ever since last summer and every night I have a dream that you're fucking me on a table in the middle of the caf! That would have the perfect effect.

"Remind me to kill Alice in the morning." I said.

He smiled. I loved making him smile.

"So there is something you're keeping from me?" he asked, raising his eyebrow.

I nodded slowly. "It's nothing bad. It's just...well I like this guy, and he doesn't like me back, and I told Alice, but I shouldn't have, since I KNOW she babbles when she gets drunk…"

Edward looked into the pool, scrutinizing his reflection like I had done earlier.

"How does it relate to me though?" he asked slowly. As if he knew the answer already.

"I don't know, I just didn't think it was that important. So I didn't tell you, and Alice thinks I should, because I always act like I don't like anyone, that I'm the Switzerland of relationships."

Edward looked up at me. "Oh. Well then I guess that's okay. Who's the guy?"

You. YOU YOU YOU YOU YOU DAMMIT!

"I don't really want to talk about it?" I tried. But Edward was determined now.

"Oh' c'mon! Well I've been keeping the same secret from you. So if you tell me I'll tell you."

I shook my head. I was NOT interested in being the first to know that he was madly in like with some stupid junior cheerleader.

"Please Bells? For me? You don't have to say his name! We'll just play it by question!"

He pouted at me and looked up at me from beneath his long lashes.

"Fine!"

He straightened up and became thoughtful. He turned to face me, sitting Indian style, and I did the same to him. He put his forehead to mine. Is it possible for your heart to stop at head to head contact?

"Okay first question. Does this boy go to our school?"

"Yes, duh!"

He laughed a little. "Just making sure"

"Does he hang out with us? What sport does he play? Was he at the party tonight?"

"Yes, Varsity Football, yes."

Edward turned thoughtful. "Hmm…this should be easy now."

That's what I was afraid of. Soon he would ask enough questions, and he'd pinpoint himself. And then it would get all awkward and he'd be like "oh well I'm going to bed" and I'd be like "Yeah… I'm gonna hit the sack too."

And then Halo parties wouldn't be the same and flag football would be me just trying to touch his body and if I even tried to talk to him it'd be weird.

"What color hair does he have?" Edward asked, his eyes twinkling.

NO! Edward was the only guy on the Varsity Football team with perfect old copper colored hair. I wanted to shoot myself in the foot. I wanted to shoot a lot of things lately.

"Reddish – Brownish. Almost Bronze." I whispered slowly.

I waited for the silence, for the yawn and the fake stretch. But it never came. I couldn't believe this. He KNEW it was him and he was still here.

He didn't say anything for awhile. But when he did speak, it was NOT what I expected.

"How do you know that he doesn't like you back? What if he just thinks that you only see him as an older brother, and that trying anything more serious would ruin the relationship. What if he likes you ten times more than you like him?"

I was shocked. I couldn't speak. My mouth would open, I'd forget what I was going to say, and then it would close.

"I...I don't know. I guess I never thought of it that way." I admitted. I was so stupid. He obviously didn't think it was him. He was just trying to help me out.

"Well you should've. If you had then we could've done this so much sooner." His eyes were almost angry. I couldn't understand why this was affecting him so much.

And then it hit me like a ton of bricks. He liked me, maybe even loved me. It all made sense now. It was almost painfully obvious. The way he pushed for me to come to the beach house with his family. How he was always so interested in everything I had to say. All the beautiful love songs he'd shown me on the internet.

There were so many times at the beach house when it would just be me and Edward in the kitchen late at night. One time we kissed. But we were both drunk out of our minds at 1am. We joked about it in the morning.

"Remember when we kissed this summer?" I asked smiling.

"How could I forget? That kiss has haunted me ever since it happened. I couldn't drink after that. Since I knew how it felt when someone did something they didn't mean because of it."

"Edward, I meant every second of that kiss, and all I've wanted all this time is to kiss you again." I whispered, slightly embarrassed at this alien courage.

"Yeah?" he said inching his face closer to mine. I nodded and murmured something positive.

And then he kissed me. It was perfect and slow, and it was as if we were exploring each other, finding something new and exciting. His tongue tickled the roof of my mouth and his teeth bit my lower lip. His hand moved to the small of my back and pushed me up against him.

So this is what heaven was like. I think if I died now, I'd be happy. Well no, I wouldn't be, because Edward wouldn't be with me.

We broke apart and he held his forehead to mine. "Bella. I need to tell you something."

"Mmhmm?" there was nothing he could say that could improve on this moment.

"Bella…I love you. I just want you to know that before you get into something you don't really want. I fell in love with you and I can't let myself stop. Not that I really want to. But if you don't want this, tell me now."

Except for those three words. But I couldn't comprehend it. I couldn't understand how he could love me.

"Why?"

Nice One Bella. Way to blow it.

He took my hand back in his, and guided it to his heart. The steady thump was comforting.

"I don't know why Bella. Maybe because you're extremely beautiful, because you made us bury the road kill we found on the road when we were younger, because you play Halo and flag football. Because I come to your house and you're wearing your dad's oxford and some flip flops, and I still want to forget all about the Football game and just hold you. This heart is yours Bella. It's been thumping for you since we met."

I didn't know what to say. I was at a complete loss for words. I couldn't bring my self to drag my hand from his chest. But soon he held my head there. We sat in silence for awhile.

"Edward…I love you too. Forever."

I could NOT believe this was happening. And then he asked if I was sleeping over, and of course I was so I said yes. And then he mentioned that he really wanted me to stay with him tonight. And I mentioned that I'd love to.

I didn't have anything to sleep in, so I ran up to his room before he got there and stole his shirt.

I was lying on his bed, making constellations in the popcorn ceiling when he came into his room.

He was standing in the doorway staring at me. I ran a hand through my hair nervously.

"What are you looking at?" I mumbled. I didn't think he heard me, but apparently he had.

"You. I kind of like the idea of you lying on my bed with my shirt on. And I like how it looks even better."

I blushed so deep my toes got warm. I turned away from him. This was a dream anyways. I was going to wake up and hate my life in about 4 minutes.

He walked into his bathroom and closed the door. The second he was gone I hopped out of his bed and up to his mirror, scrutinizing my appearance. I unbuttoned his shirt and pushed up my boobs.

They weren't too small, but they weren't the gorgeous bazookas some of the girls in our school had. My waist was pretty well shaped. I turned around and looked at the tramp stamp I had gotten of a crescent moon.

I was trying to figure out what he could possibly want. We were completely uneven. He was Adonis. His 8 pack was chiseled and smooth. But the only hair on his chest was a bronze tinted happy trail, a trail that was smack dab in the middle of hottest sex muscles I'd ever seen.

I took off the shirt and stood in front of the Mirror. Trying to understand what he wanted. I didn't even notice that he was no longer in the bathroom.

"Well, this is a wonderful surprise." He said slowly, creeping up behind me. He put his hands on my exposed waist. I almost creamed myself right then.

No Bella. Tonight is not about sex! Tonight is about getting to know each other and…

"Bella. Right now you're making it very hard to remain gentleman like.

If you could put my shirt back on, we could maintain normal conversation."

"I don't want normal conversation, I want you." I tilted my head and he planted slow kissed on my neck and collarbone. My head rolled back and he turned me. Kissing me and guiding me over to the bed.

We finally resurfaced and he looked into my eyes. "You're the best kisser."

I shook my head. "I doubt it." I said giggling. He dipped his head again, but stopped short at a small squeal.

"Oh my god are you guys making out? Uhh! I just came in to make sure Bella got home okay but I guess you took over that huh? Gross!"

Alice was at the doorway.

Mood dead, scene over. This was a nightmare wasn't it?

But Edward was shaking with laughter. I was sure that I was red with embarrassment.

I couldn't believe I didn't drug her. I always give her sleeping pills so that she doesn't get back up!!

She was still going on, mumbling on the threshold. Until I guess something else reached the threshold.

She smacked a hand to her mouth and ran to the bathroom down the hall. Edward took his chance, jumped out of his bed and locked the door before pulling it shut.

But he didn't come back to his bed. He just stood there. "Wanna just talk for now? I think Alice just killed the mood."

I nodded. "I want to know everything about you."

He climbed back under the covers behind me. Our bodies were molded together almost spooning.

He was playing with my hair and kissing my neck. I still couldn't believe this was happening!

"Okay, so easy questions first. But you HAVE to tell the truth!"

He murmured "Of course love," into my neck. His fingers moved to the top of my panties, just playing with the top of them.

"What is your…favorite movie?" I asked. I'm so creative sometimes

"Kill Bill Vol.2" he said, emotionless.

"Color?"

"I don't know, what color are your eyes?"

I laughed.

"No, your eyes are beautiful, but I love the color Red. There's so much power in it."

He turned me to face him, halting his attack on my neck.

"Okay, my turn. But I already know everything else. I wanna know the real stuff."

I shivered a little and he pulled me closer. His breath smelled like mint, but it was warm.

"What is your least favorite part about yourself?"

I rolled my eyes. "Edward is that really necessary?" He didn't understand what he was asking. I was a regular girl. I hated basically everything about my body!

"I don't really see anything special about myself."

"I want to prove you wrong." He whispered, as if he had read my mind and seen my self doubt.

I closed my eyes and waited to wake up. The dreams always stopped at the best part. I felt his lips brush my ear again. "This isn't a dream. I saw you standing in front of the mirror, and I don't think we see you the same way."

He got up out of the bed. I couldn't hide my groan. He beckoned to me to follow him so of course I did. As if I had any other choice. He led me to the full length mirror and stood me in front of it.

"Your eyes…whenever I look into them I'm drowning. It's as if I dove in and I never want to resurface. Your lips are perfect. You don't know how many times I've missed what you're saying, because I've been staring at them instead of listening. Your hair is so soft Bella, and so fragrant all the time. Whenever you're near me it's hard to breathe, even though all I wanna do is bury my face in your hair…."

I cut him off with a kiss. I was going to implode. "Edward stop it. I'm done, I understand, I'm beautiful" I needed him to hold me. But he turned me around again.

"I'm not finished yet love, let me finish. Your chest, don't get me started I could go on forever, your breasts are perfect. Remember that time this summer when Emmett undid your bikini top as a joke? I had to run inside the house and lock myself in the bathroom to keep from dragging you into my bedroom and worshiping you for hours. Your shape and your hips are incredible. I always had to wonder, and I'm sure that every girl in our school does, how you could spend all your time with a camera around your neck and so little time doing physical activity and still look perfect."

My breath was coming out in sobs now. I was delirious. Tears rolled down my cheeks as he continued his assault on my self doubt.

"And when it comes to your legs, whenever you wear a mini skirt I have to grip the closest thing to me to keep from ripping it off you."

He stopped and turned me back towards him. He pressed my face into his chest and stroked my hair. "You're beautiful Bella. Your name wouldn't fit on anyone else."

I was sobbing. I couldn't believe I was being such a blubbering idiot.

Edward thought I was perfect. Edward fantasized about me. Edward…Edward…Edward.

"I love you." He whispered into my hair. "I love you more." I said, looking up at him. He held my face in his hands, his eyes looking directly into mine. "You wish." He said, before pulling me into the most searing kiss of my lifetime.

He led me back to his bed. It had to be 3 in the morning by now.

"I think you should sleep." I shook my head, feeling slightly childish of how afraid I was to close my eyes.

"I don't want this night to end." I admitted sheepishly. He kissed my forehead. "Then it doesn't have to."

We continued to talk and ask questions. But the fact that we were asking these questions underneath his covers made it harder for me to come out with easy answers.

"Are you a virgin?" he was saying.

"No." I said quickly. I tried to jump to a new question but he wouldn't let me without getting an explanation.

He dipped his fingers dangerously close to my center and my breath hitched.

"Who's already had you?" he asked. He sounded very jealous and upset.

"I don't think I want to tell you." What can I say? I feared for the guys' safety. I was pretty sure me and Edward were a pretty official deal, and I didn't want him murdering anyone because he hadn't had me first.

"Why don't you want to tell me?" his voice fell. He was disappointed. I don't think he liked it when I kept things from him,

"Does that really matter Edward? Does the first time even really count? It's just awkward and painful! NOT what I'd want to share with you. With you I'd want magic, not awkward fumbling. And it's not like you're a virgin either."

"Bella, who was it?" He had leaned into me, and was kissing my neck. My eyes rolled back. "Who was the first person to touch you like this?" He slipped his fingers into my boy shorts and brushed my clit. My back arched.

I was losing my mind. His fingers were deft and agile. There was no awkwardness here, he knew what he was doing. And I was being interrogated about past experiences?

He slipped a finger inside me.

"Mike Newton, last year, at a party."

Shit! I groaned. This was not fair. How come he could worm anything out of me with his fingers?

He took his fingers out and laughed. "I'm going to the bathroom to wash my hands and figure out how I'm gonna punish Mike Newton for having you first."

He kissed me on lips and then on my forehead before strutting into the bathroom.

I felt terrible. I wanted him to know me, I wanted him to touch me better than Mike Newton had and better than anyone else ever could. I pulled off his shirt and my bra and underwear and just lay naked on his bed, waiting for him to come back outside.

My pussy was throbbing from what his fingers had done, and I wanted to induce the same feeling to him. I shut my eyes quickly when I heard the doorknob. He walked back towards me and then stopped short.

If you're my soul mate, you won't ask any questions. I thought. Without a word, he crawled over me. "You're incredible." He whispered softly, his hands roaming up and down my sides.

He kissed my forehead, my cheeks, my nose, and finally, my lips. And when I deepened the kiss he melted into me. His chest pressed to mine and my heart stopped. But when it restarted, it was different. It was his.

We moved together slowly. He took the peak of my left breast into his mouth and swirled his tongue around it before taking it out and blowing on it lightly. The cold was erotic and amazing. He was pinching my right breast between his fingers with his hands, and soon he switched the motion. It also helped that his fully erect head was brushing ever so lightly against my opening.

I reached my hand down between us and began to pump his member with my hand. He breathed my name into my mouth before bring his tongue to meet mine. I stroked him lightly with my fingertips and then massaged him with my entire hand, his eyes glazing over when I brushed my thumb over his head.

His breathing became shallow and he shut his eyes. I knew what was about to happen so I stopped and he positioned himself at my entrance. His eyes opened wide and he looked at me. I nodded slowly and nodded as well, and our lips met as our bodies entwined.

It was perfect and pure, and I felt all his love and his passion and his care was over me like a wave. I pushed it all back onto him as we created a rhythm. Alice would've been completely knocked out by now, so I was sure no one heard our cries echoing through the otherwise silent house.

When we both reached our release, he laid on top of me, panting for breath. I wasn't sure where he ended and I began anymore, and I didn't even care.

"I'm yours Edward, all of me is yours. I love you." I said. He rolled off of me and turned me to face him.

"As I am yours," he said slowly. He moved my hair out of my face again. And once again I gave him my full attention.

"Even if you decide you don't want me anymore. I'll be here."

I was satisfied, but I was still gonna kill Alice. I turned so that my back pressed into his chest and he held me close to him.

I could get used to this.