Interview with
Anko
By: queenofrandomness
A/N: Well, this is my interview. Um, it's the first thing I've ever written. If you want to make requests, go ahead. BTW: In here I am Hiomi and my friend (who help me write this) is Anna. I really am clueless at times. Please review. .
Disclaimer: I don't own nuthin. Not even the pocket lint in my pockets. It belongs to my parents.
Hiomi: Hello everyone! Today, I am going to mur-, I mean interview Anko here. points to Anko Say hi to everyone Anko. Cause it'll be your last grins evilly
Anko: Um, what was that Hiomi?
Hiomi: Nothing, nothing! Soon little mortal, soon! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!
Anko: Backs away slowly What are you 'laughing' about? Because it's starting to freak me out.
Hiomi: Oh, um... uh... LOOK! IT'S TOM CRUISE!!! Points behind Anko
Anko: Turns around WHERE?!
Hiomi: Walks towards door I'll get you next time!
Anko: Hey! Tom Cruise isn't here!
Hiomi: About to open the door.
Anna: Comes bursting through the door. WHERE'S HIOMI?!
Anko: Points behind the door.
Anna: Oh... Whoops! Anyway, WHY'D YOU PAINT MY DOG?!
Hiomi: He was feelin' blue.
Anko: HEY! Aren't you supposed to be interviewing ME?!
Hiomi: I don't know. Was I? (A/N: Wow! Totally Clueless!! --)
Anna: Aww! Why isn't Gaa-chan (Gaara) here?
Hiomi: Didn't you read the sign? Points to sign that appears from nowhere. 'No Emo's Allowed!' Or Elmo for that matter!
Anko:Why not Elmo! He's so cute!
Anna: I KNOW!!
A/A: Start singing 'Elmo's World'
Hiomi: Are you guys on crack or something?
A/A: Look at each other Maybe.
Hiomi: Sighs How many times do I have to tell you people?! If you need some, come to me!
Anna: OK! I'll have-.
Anko: Slaps Anna. You idiots! We're on live TV!!
Hiomi: We are? I mean, Of Course we are! Well folks, hope you enjoyed our totally pointless play!
Audience Member: Why are you refering to drugs?! There are children here you know!
Hiomi: There are? Shrugs.
Audience Member: Of course there are! And you just inspired them!
Hiomi: Did not!
Audience Member: Did too!
Hiomi: Did not! Throws random chair at the Audience Member.
Audience Member: Gets scared, and runs off, peeing in his pants.
Hiomi: Dusting off her hands. Well, that takes care of him!
Anna: What do you mean?
Hiomi: I Mean, he could've exposed us!
Anko: And what do you mean by that?
Hiomi: He could've gone to the cops!
Anna: Well then, Pulls out flamethrower I guess I'll just have to 'take care' of you too! Points flamethrower at Hiomi.
Hiomi: Whoa! What do you mean by that?
Anna: You could tell the cops I attepted to buy drugs!
Hiomi: Why would I do that?! If I told them about you, I would have to tell them about me too, right?
Anna: Hmm. Good point. But can I still use the flamethrower on you though?
Assistant: Comes out of nowhere. NO! No flamethrower allowed!
Everybody Else: AWW SHUT IT SR. QUESO!
Assisant: 'Sr. Queso'? Where'd that come from?
Hiomi: Shrugs I don't know. It's the first thing that came to mind. Why? Do you not like it? Sticks out tongue
Assistant: No! I DON'T like it!
Hiomi: Fine! I'll call you Jeeves then.
Assistant: JEEVES?!
Hiomi: Yes Jeeves. Now go get me water.
Assistant: I'm your assistant, not your servant!
Hiomi: WATER!!!
Anna: Me too!
Anko: Me three!
Assistant: FINE!!! Stomps off mumbling to himself.
Anko: Now, AREN'T YOU SUPPOSED TO BE INTERVIEWING ME?! NOT DOING TOTALLY RANDOM STUFF!
Hiomi: Sighs Fine. Do have a hissy fit!
Anko: I DON'T HAVE HISSY FITS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Anna: Anyway, Hiomi, Switches to British accent. I do believe you had a question for Anko.
Hiomi: Switches to British accent too. Oh yes! Quite right! Quite right!
Anko: Why are you guys talking funny?
Hiomi: Back to normal accent. DO YOU WANT THE STUPID QUESTION OR NOT?!?!?!
A/A: Now look who's having a hissy fit.
Hiomi: I'M NOT-!
Bell Starts Ringing
Anna: What the hell is that?!
A Lot Of People Come Rushing In
Doctor: Ok, we can do this the easy way, or the hard way!
Hiomi: YOU'LL NEVER CATCH ME ALIVE!!!!
Doctor: Sighs. That's what you said yesterday. Fine. Have it your way. Snaps fingers.
Some Random Big Guy Comes And Holds HiomiDown
Hiomi: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!! Looks at the guy. Oh. Hey Todd! Haven't seen you in a while.
Todd: Yeah, I've been on vacation with my family. You know how it is.
Doctor: Todd! What have I told you about conversing with the patients?!
Todd: Sorry Doctor.
Doctor: OK! Hiomi, time for you medicine.
Hiomi: Never!!!!! Somehow breaks away from Todd's grip.
Doctor: Get Her!!!!!
Hiomi: Runs into a closet, locking the door.
Anna: Sighs. HIOMI! GET OUT HERE AND TAKE YOUR MEDICINE! NOW!
Hiomi: Crosses arms like a little child. No.
Anko: Let me try something. Hiomi, LOOK! It's Johnny Depp!
Hiomi: Busts out of the closet. WHERE?!
Doctors Rush In And Give HiomiHer Medication
Hiomi: Hiomi feel sleepy. FLYING CHIPMUNKS! Collapses.
Anna: Well, I guess that's the end of that interview!
Anko: But, what about my question?
Anna: Sweatdrops Actually... There never was question. It was fust to shut you up.
Anko: WHAT?! Picks up Anna's flamethrower. I'LL BURN YOU TO BITS!!!!
Assistant: Comes bursting through the wall. NO!
A/A: SHUT UP, JEEVES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Assistant: Throws up hands. Fine! Kill yourselves for all I care!
Anna: Runs out of the building.
Anko: Runs after her.
Hiomi: Well, that's the REAL end of the interview. Ja ne! Collapses again.
There you have it! My very retarded interview. I think you'll find youruself agreeing with me. Well, please review, and thanks for reading! Ja Ne!
BTW: If I offended someone in this fic, I am very sorry.
