Prolong: The memory.
It happened, right after the final battle, when Harry threw the final Avada Kedavra. The Forbidden Forest was peaceful once again, and the sounds of the battle far off in the distance. Harry glanced my way, his green eyes burning with fatigue and something else. I had been fighting against four of my former colleagues who had disappeared the moment after they felt the Earth shudder and the Dark Lord fall to the ground, burned beyond all recognition from the spells used to weaken his magic. We never spoke of our passion, even to each other. We never allowed it to consume our daily thoughts, as we trained together until we were too exhausted to do anything more than sleep. In those moments, as we sat side by side, animosity and fear set up on the self did we finally see each other for who we were and learn to accept the differences. By the time your 6th year came around, you were more versed in the dark arts and defense then most of the 7th years and Aurors that were supposed to protect you. Dumbledore had a plan, mind you not a very solid one, but a plan. It took everything in me to watch you from afar be lured out to the Forbidden Forest and not want to protect you. We had done nothing more than kiss once or twice but the instant that I felt your lips against mine, I was gone. Lilly, God love her, was a mere slip of a memory compared to what I had felt for you.
The plan was that I was to wait to be summoned by the Dark Lord when you had finally been captured, after feeding him the information on how to get you out to him. I watched from the Tower as you slipped silently out of the castle, dark storm clouds thundering around you as you fled the security of the castle to the very nest of the vipers. I wanted to weep, I wanted to cry and scream but instead I watched and waited for my mark to burn. I kept close to Dumbledore, as per the plan, and tried with every ounce of discipline I had not to worry.
It was several hours later when the Dark Lord summoned me, and by that time I was sick with thought of you believe that you had been killed before this stupid plan even got started. Finally feeling the dark mark burn, I prepared Albus for my departure and fled the castle until the wards could no longer effect me. I apparated to his side, ready with wand in hand as I landed and prostrated myself in front of the hideous beast I used to worship. His voice silky and smooth, with a touch of arrogance made me want to slap his face in anger.
"Severus, I have a surprise for you for being such a good and loyal subject!" His voice hissed next to my ear and I repressed a shudder of disgust as I lowered my head in mock worship. Then you were brought to me, and I could tell I was a late arrival to the party. The marks and bruises already stood out against your tanned skin, and the swollen right eye told me so much more than your words ever did. Voldemort had already lent out his prize, and the other death eaters had gotten a taste of what I hadn't.
It has been a long time since someone caught me so unawares, but being an occulumency master, I saved myself by voiding all emotions. Sneering at your helpless bound body I almost died as I was forced to participate in your torture. I knew that it was only a matter of time, before the Order came and was able to rescue you but it was still two hours into the torture before you had some sort of reprieve.
When the Order finally came the battle began in earnest, and with hexes and unforgivables flying between the two sides I quickly made my way to your side. Pulling out my potions that I had created for this purpose I poured them down your throat and silently prayed to whatever deity there was to help you. When you finally did move, I could tell that you only had one shot at this. Your hand trembled as I helped you to your feet and placed your wand back in your hand. With all the horcruxes finally destroyed, it was time for you to die so that you could take the monster with you. I could see fear in your viridian eyes but a steely determination to finish what had begun all those years ago. Ducking and dodging through the fray, I got caught up with my former associates, those who had seen me nurse you back to health. Pushing you forward, I began my own battle. It wasn't until I felt the Earth shudder and both you and the monster fall to the ground that I realized that the plan had worked. The death eaters fled, leaving me with a few parting hexes as they apparated away in fear. Crawling over to your body, I cradled your head on my lap. I never knew how much time I was there, only that the sun was beginning to rise when your eyes opened and you looked at me.
Albus appeared a moment later, urgent warnings for both of us to port-key back to the castle and await the news their. Shoving an old snitch in both of our hands we disappeared from the bloody field and back into my quarters. You were just content to allow me to hold you, and so I did enjoying the fact that my mark had disappeared from my skin leaving nothing but fresh skin in its place. The battle was won, and we could get on with our lives. Exhausted, you reached up to say something and kissed me gently on the lips spurring a passion I had no idea coursed through my veins. I took your mouth hungrily and thrust my tongue to stroke yours. Your surrender was like a drug and I eagerly sopped it up. The sound of clothes ripping filled the silent room as you wordlessly banked the fire before tossing your wand aside and stroking every inch of my battered dirty body. Leaning back on the rug we warred for dominance within each other until I let go. I had been dominated all my life first with my father then with Voldemort and Albus plucking the strings that bade me to follow the rule of other men and every time it felt wrong until then. You rolled on top and had your way, pinning my hands gently to the side of my body before exploring every thing my body had to offer. When your mouth descended onto my penis I screamed in pleasure and arched up into the welcoming heat. You tasted me until I could give you no more, expertly touching me in ways that I thought you ignorant. A finger tapped my wrist before letting go the grip and reaching up to play with my hairless chest, I understood the silent signal even in the thrones of pleasure, be still don't fight.
You reached for my nipple, gently squeezing it in time with your mouth and I nearly wept in pleasure of it all. Your other hand snaked down and found my entrance and began dancing around the edges teasing the sensitive skin. I could feel the climax coming, and stammered to try to tell you but you never let go, increasing the pressure on my member until you started to hum and suck at the same time. When I came I saw supernovas and stars! I know that I blacked out for a few seconds and my chest refused to draw breath to my body.
When I awoke you were on top of me, a small satisfied smirk on your face as you leaned in to kiss me. I wanted to pull away, worried I wouldn't like the taste of myself but as your lips touched mine, I felt the strange hunger implode in me and deepened the kiss eager to taste the both of us together. When you pulled away I could tell you wanted more, and I was only too happy to oblige. No words were said as you recognized the hunger and wordlessly summoned the lubricant to your side. Your fingers breeched me, and I felt a chill run down my spine at the thought of similar positions I had been force to take during my service with the Dark Lord. Angry with myself, I pushed the hurtful thoughts away as I concentrated on just your fingers. You gave me reprieve from the pleasure of being stroked into, your fingers hitting my prostrate until I was weeping again for you to take me. When the fingers were removed, my legs were lifted into place and I could feel the heaviness of your penis against my loosened entrance. Reaching up I stroked back your messy black hair from your face, smiling slightly at the feeling. Slowly you pushed in and I felt the pain/pleasure of being filled again. Biting my lip I gripped the rug and closed my eyes. There is a certain amount of pain involved with the act, as there is with taking a virgin woman. It had been a long time since the Dark Lord had called for my services, and I could tell that I was out of practice yet your hands stroked my face, as I had done just moments before and soft words were whispered into my ear as you gained entrance into my body. When you were finally seated, I opened my eyes and stared into your eyes, sharing a moment that was just for lovers. We didn't have to talk, we didn't have to move it was being inside each other after so long of just wanting. You reached down and kissed me, not as passionately as before but enough. We explored each other's mouths while you waited for me to give you the signal. Breaking the kiss, I leaned up flexing my internal muscles to grip you harder as I latched my mouth onto your nipple, I watched as you yelped in pleasure and attempted to hold back thrusting. Nibbling across your chest I played with the other nipple, feeling you tremble shake in an attempt to control yourself. I wanted this to last forever. Holding myself up on my elbows I reached for your neck, determined to force your hand and have you lose control. I could see the wariness in your green eyes as you felt the pleasure ripple through your body and the pain of holding back. Staring in your eyes I silently begged you to lose control, and with a slight nod you obliged me. You pulled out, almost all the way then thrust in hard, ensuring that you hit my prostate with the stroke. I wailed and lost the tender balance I had on my elbows, arching up into the strokes as you lost control. Your hand on my shoulder as leverage you continued to pound into me, varying the strokes from long to short, hard to soft until I was in another world and all I could feel was you. All the training must have done something for your stamina, as sweat began to coat our bodies you gave no indication that this was going to be a short night. We ventured all over the floor, dragging the helpless rug along with us as we found ourselves twisted against my favorite couch face down as you slowed your strokes and fucked me with just the tip of your penis. My legs trembled as I attempted to shove back, wanting more but you were stronger and I was willing to give in. You held me still, disallowing me to get my wish as you continued to play my body like a honed instrument. Grabbing my hands you held them to the small of my back as finally you gave one full thrust and I cried out in pleasure. Letting go of my hands you brought me down hard again, this time holding onto me tightly as we slipped off the couch and onto the floor with me on top. You wanted me to finish it, you wanted to allow me my due as your hands fell from my waist I slid up and down your member using your knees for balance as I took as much pleasure from your body as I wanted. I controlled the pace, as I varied the speed as you had done. Our sweat slick bodies slid over the rug and stone floor making it hard to find purchase and momentum to get a good rhythm but finally I felt the tingling down my spine and into my groin as I sped up. Reaching down I began to stroke myself in time with our bodies until I heard your cry and felt your release, your body tense under mine as your hands scraped for purchase against the stone floor. I could see the ecstasy on your face and lost it right then my cum spurting off onto my favorite couch and all over the floor.
Some how we made it to where we were laying next to each other face to face I had fallen asleep as you dreamed and drooled on my wet chest after several hours we awoke to make love again and then again. By midnight the next day we were exhausted and happy never moving from our place before the fire. I watched you trace patterns on my chest, as the words I was dying to say rattled in my head. I wanted to be with you, for the rest of my life. I wanted to have you in my bed and heart, but was hesitant to speak, fearful of the rebuttal that I might hear. Finally you looked up, the peace and contented look on your face replaced by sadness.
"I proposed to Ginny…she accepted me." Your words shocked me, and I felt my heart shatter into a million pieces. I felt alone and naked as if everyone could see that my heart was on my sleeve. "We want to be married soon, before she goes to tryouts for quidditch." You explained, looking guilty and unsure. Your fingers had stopped dancing on my chest and you pulled away in search of the torn remnants' of clothes that we had started with.
"So, I was just a pity fuck?" My voice hoarse from all the screaming during sex, and I wished that I had had a chance to take something before speaking. I could hear the warble of uncertainty and pain in the modulation of my tone and inwardly cursed myself. Standing up I sought out my clothes, summoning new robes from my wardrobe and putting them on before speaking again. Somehow the cloth against my heated skin helped me find my strength as I turned and glared at you.
"NO! Not a pity fuck! I love you!" I could tell that you were upset, and for once I had no inclination to want to sooth you as I marched away from you to the sidebar and poured myself a drink.
"So what then Potter! What am I supposed to believe! How could you do this to me you selfish spoiled whelp!" My magic swirled and I fought to keep it from destroying my compartment, although half way tempted to shoot it at you.
Your face contorted with rage and helplessness as you opened your mouth, "Don't you see…this is what they want! They want to see the war ended and for me to end up with a wife! I don't have the strength to go against! I can't. I just want to be left alone in peace, and if this is the way to do it then so be it. I lose too you know!"
"What do you know about losses? What do you care what every one else thinks! Why can't you decide for yourself what you wish to do?" I screamed back, throwing down the glass in anger.
"Because, my life was already decided! My destiny was already decided and I have NO bloody choice in the matter!" You argued, slumping down in the chair.
"You always have a choice Harry! Your path is never preordained!" I argued, feeling the heat of the argument die down. You looked pathetic in your robes and the weary look on your face gave me pause. For a moment we sat in silence, myself staring at the fire and you staring at your hands. Then suddenly you stood, rearranging your robes so that they covered your nakedness and headed for the door.
I felt the tears burn at my eyes and my heart stop beating in my chest, "If you leave through that door do not expect to be welcomed back!" I hissed, feeling the pain and anger combine in my heart.
You didn't even stop or glance back but steadfastly kept walking through the entrance to my compartment, and after the door swept close I fell to my knees and wept.