To Dan,
I feel really silly writing this letter and your probably looking down on me laughing for being so upset. Was looking through some of your stuff yesterday and I found them pictures of us we took in that photo booth in town,we had such a laugh that day running around the shops and trying really expensive clothes on. I keep expecting you to walk through the door and go on and on about Ronnie and the Mitchell's,i wouldn't even mind if I could have just a little more time with you. Nothing feels the same anymore,even the stall feels so empty,i got no one to have a laugh with,no one to chat with that gets me and understands me. Everyone I ever love leaves me in the end,your no different Dan,but I miss you so much. Uncle Charlie and Nan are really upset,the house is so quiet and lifeless,the whole square is in shock. I feel so bad that I wasn't there for you Dan,i should have been a better mate. All them times when you needed me I let you down,i just wanted to say im sorry. It was suppose to be you and me against the world,against everyone,you never needed the Mitchell's to make you happy.
I saw Ronnie today,oh Dan she looks awful,the worst ive ever seen her actually. No make-up,her hair tied up,she looks so run down and depressed. I want to go and talk to her but I cant,i dont want to say the wrong thing and have a stupid argument,none of us need it at the moment. I know I was never a big fan of Ronnie but I know how much you loved her,im gonna tell her that at the funeral tomorrow. It sounds so horrible,going to your funeral I just cant believe your not here anymore,its not fair. That night when you got run over I never thought you were going to go,i thought the next day we would be laughing about it and you would finally have what you wanted. Never seen Ronnie so hysterical after the ambulance took you away,she just sat there in the road in bits,no one knew what to do. She was so different to her usual frosty self though,ive never seen her cry and scream like that,it was quite frightening.
There were so many things you wanted to do and see,i just wish we could do them together and have a laugh. Nothing will be the same now,i lost the best mate I could ever wish for,the only mate that actually cared about me. Atleast you wont have to put up with mums cooking anymore I suppose thats one good thing! I should have been there for you when you went home with Paul that night,i should have been taking care of you and I let you down. All them stupid arguments we had I never meant any of the things I said,i still feel guilty when I threw you out. I would even go to that stupid boxing class if I could have you back! You were always so different to any of the other mates ive had, so kind and friendly,not like me,everyone seems to keep out of the way when im walking down the street! Remember that time in R&R when I said I was going to tell Ronnie and you flipped out on me? Never seen you like that before I guess you were a Mitchell in your own way,Ronnie would have been proud to have someone like you Dan!
I decided to put some things in a box for you,just silly little things like pictures and that beer mat from the bloke in the bar,the one that was chatting you up! I was even starting to put some money aside for us to go away together,just a little holiday,get away from the square and just have a laugh. It would have been so much fun just me and you,getting drunk and hitting all the clubs,you probably would have hated it and stayed sober just to look after me. Thats the kind of person you were Dan,you were so kind and such a good mate. I dunno how im gonna cope without seeing you everyday,its like apart of me is with you just wishing for you to come back.
When I saw you laying in Ronnie's arms I didnt know what to think,but I know that was exactly where you wanted to be with Ronnie. All you ever spoke about was her,it was annoying at times I remember you would only want to go to the club if she was working. I should have encouraged you more to tell her though,maybe If I did you would still be here. What am I gonna do without you? I lost the best friend in the world,i feel like I got nobody. I know what you would say though,you would say stop being so stupid and wear something respectful for your day tomorrow! Uncle Charlie is driving me to Telford,im dreading it Dan I really am this wasn't suppose to be the end. I know the world is gonna move on and people are gonna forget about you but I wont,i will never forget you Danielle. I dont think Ronnie will either,shes so lost and broken,i cant imagine how shes feeling right now,even worse than me I imagine. Who would have thought it eh? Me being nice about a Mitchell,i would have tried to get on with Ronnie for you,i wouldn't have let no one push you around. Everything seems to remind me of you,just sitting in this empty bedroom feels so lonely. Your washing is still on your bed neatly in piles,your lucky I haven't lost anything because this room would be a mess. I remember you used to get so annoyed at the state of our room,you even put all my clothes away once do you remember? Im gonna try and be abit more like you,you were a good person you did nothing wrong to anybody.
I'll never forget you Dan,i hope you find some peace wherever you are because you deserve it! I loved you like a sister,you were family,i miss you so much.
All my love
Stacey
Something I thought about and decided to share it with you guys! Please read and review and enjoy!! :)
