Title: All's Fair in Love (and War)
Author: Karen U/revivingophelia
Pairing/Character: Eve/CM Punk (eventual), Zack Ryder, John Cena, the Bellas, Daniel Bryan, others
Disclaimer: No one you recognize belongs to me
Rating: R/M
Summary: It all started with a bet... and ended with something she never expected.
Spoilers: starts around Dec. 2011. This is set with story line being just that - story line.
Warnings: language, adult situations, violence

Note: This fic? Not so nice to Cena or Ryder. Consider this fair warning.

Part One

He wasn't sure why, exactly, he'd decided to go out tonight. The bar scene wasn't really his thing - hence why he was sitting in a corner booth drinking a Coke (they didn't have Pepsi) while the rest of his coworkers that had wandered down to the bar were practically chugging down beer. Well, the guys were, anyway. He'd seen Nikki Bella earlier with Dolph Ziggler, and she'd been drinking something with an umbrella in it. Not that it really mattered.

Shaking his head, he took another drink of his Coke, his gaze moving over what he could see of the place. He'd grabbed a corner booth that was hidden in the shadows, and so far, it had been enough to keep people away from him. Most people probably didn't even realize the booth was taken, and even if someone did see him, the hooded sweatshirt he wore helped to conceal who he was... Though he supposed the hand tattoos would give him away if anyone got close enough to look. But so far, both fans and coworkers had stayed away, and he was glad for that. He wasn't in the mood for company, and he figured the main reason he'd ended up here was because he hadn't been able to sleep. Of course, the amount of caffeine he'd ingested since getting here probably meant he'd have even more trouble sleeping once he got back to his room.

Sighing softly, he leaned back further in the cushions of the bench seat of the booth, vaguely aware that the booth next to his - hidden from view by the high backs of the benches and the plants on top of them - was now occupied. The voices he heard made it clear that the booth was occupied by people that he worked with, and after vaguely entertaining the thought of at least saying hello, he pushed that thought away and instead slumped down in his seat, figuring the others would only see him if he left first, so his solitude was probably safe enough. And, given the loud voices he could hear from the booth, he was going to have ample opportunity to eavesdrop... Not really his thing, but once he heard what the men were talking about, well...

"Dude, she is, like, scorching hot," a voice that was fairly easily recognizable to the eavesdropper said. It was Zack Ryder's voice, if he wasn't mistaken... And the second voice that spoke made it obvious he was right. Those two always hung out together lately.

"No shit. She's the hottest girl in the company. The only way she could look better is out of her clothes instead of in them," John Cena said, and then a third voice spoke up, one that the man in the other booth couldn't quite place.

"Well, I doubt you'll ever see her like that. Even if the WWE started working with Playboy again or something, she'd be among the least likely to ever pose-"

"Dude, who's talking about posing? I'm talking up close and personal. I would love to tap that," Cena declared, and the third man let out a snort.

"Not likely," he said, or at least that's what it sounded like he said. He seemed to be the furthest away, and he was talking more quietly than the other two.

Cena let out a snort. "What? You doubt my abilities to get a woman?" he asked, and the still-unidentified man replied.

"When it comes to her? Yeah, I do."

Zack cut in. "And who's to say she'd go for you, anyway? I could get her. I'm going to be working with her," the man said, making it all too obvious who it was they were talking about: Eve Torres. And for the record? Odds were that the third guy - the one that doubted Cena's abilities - was the one that was right.

"You think you're the only one gonna be working with her? I am, too. And I can get her like that," Cena said, snapping his fingers for emphasis.

"You wanna make a bet?" Zack tossed back.

"With you? Sure," Cena replied, and it was then that the third guy tried to speak up.

"Guys, this is not a good idea-"

"Shut up. We're talking here," Cena interrupted him. "I bet that I can get Eve into bed before you do. And by into bed... I mean that I'll do her before you do."

"Guys," the third man tried again, clearly not thrilled, but Cena and Zack were apparently too intent on the prospect of a bet to pay attention to him.

"So the bet would be for sex. Not dating, taking her out to dinner. Actual sex. How would we prove it?" Zack wanted to know. "Are we just going to believe each other? Also... How much is the bet for?"

"I'd go with a thousand dollars," Cena said. "Whoever bangs Eve first gets a thousand dollars. As for proof? Bring a pair of her panties-"

"An asshole TSA agent going through her things at the airport could steal a pair of her panties," the third man interrupted, clearly irritated. "In fact, I think that might have actually happened to Kelly."

"And on top of that, how would we prove that they're hers?" Zack put in. "We should take a picture of her sleeping or something. Nothing graphic, just shoulders and up."

"You can't be serious-"

Cena interrupted whatever the third man was going to say. "Works for me. A thousand dollars. Whoever sleeps with her first wins. Proof is in the picture." He paused, then asked, "You want in?" Clearly, he was talking to the third man in the booth, and just as clearly, Cena hadn't noticed that the third man seemed to be against this idea.

"I have a girlfriend that I happen to love dearly-"

"Then that's a no. So it's just us," Cena said. "You ready to lose, Ryder?"

"In your dreams, man. That thousand dollars is mine. Who wants to bet Eve's a screamer?" he went on, and then the men changed the subject from the bet to other things, unaware that someone had listened in on their entire conversation.

Sitting in the back booth, still hidden from sight, CM Punk stared down at his tattooed hands, still not sure who the third man in the booth was, but figuring it didn't matter. After all, the bet was just between Cena and Ryder. He knew those two for sure. They were the ones that had made the bet... And now? Now he just had to figure out how in the hell to tell Eve.

And hope like hell that she believed him.