Rescue
Part One: Desolate
Disclaimer: Only my stuff is mine.
A/N: Okay…so I NEVER thought I'd do this. I wrote a tag for one of my most hated episodes of SG-1. I don't even wanna write the title. It's season 3, episode 17. I will call it 'Three Months.'
I recently watched one scene from this episode and immediately felt my shipper heart go into overload. I had to write this. Partly because I love Janet to death and think this definitely should have happened in the episode. But, mostly because I turn every episode into a shippery one. Sam/Jack is amazing. They're amazing.
Okay, so here goes. It took a week of convincing myself to write it…to get the courage to even think about this episode…but here we are.
BTW: Because I won't watch the whole episode ever again, I'm going off a five year old memory. I don't remember exactly how long he was gone…except for the big clue in the title. Any mistakes are mine. Much apologies.
IMPORTANT!! I just want to say thank you to everyone who has reviewed my other stories…but most importantly all the 'anonymous' reviewers! Since I can't write replies to you I just wanna give one big shout-out. Thank you so much!! I really, really, really appreciate them!! I would totally dedicate a story to you, but then I'd worry that you hated the story and would then think that I hated you.
Oh well. All my stories are dedicated to everyone!! How 'bout that? Pick and choose the ones you like, folks, and let me know! Much love!! (Especially 'anonymous' reviewer Caroline. Your review totally cracked me up! Thanks so much!)
So…please…
ENJOY!!
Sam was first through the gate. She exited the wormhole at a near run and only stopped when the general called her.
"Major Carter!" The general said proudly. "Glad to have you back! I trust your mission was a success?"
Sam hesitated, choking on the tears that she refused to let fall. "Yes sir. The mission went…fine." She paused, struggling again with the urge to burst into tears. She saw Hammond's eyes narrow with concern. His hand twitched like he wanted to reach out to her…but, he changed his mind at the last minute. "With your permission, sir…I'd like to change before the briefing."
It was a lame excuse even to her own ears. But…she had to get out of there. Any second the colonel was going to come moping through the gate and she couldn't be around him right now.
Hammond could see the caged panic in the woman's eyes. Her face was drawn and she looked very much like she was fighting not to cry. He also noticed that she was edging closer to the blast doors, shooting a pained glance at the shimmering wormhole every few seconds. Feeling her anxiety washing over him in waves he nodded. "Permission granted. Briefing will be at 0900 tomorrow."
"Yes sir." Sam said gratefully. She moved to turn on her heel, but stopped dead when the colonel came through the wormhole…looking every bit as devastated as he had on the planet. His eyes met hers and before he could say anything, she pivoted and bolted down the hall.
She knew she should be stronger than this. For Gods' sakes, she had spent years developing the perfect neutral expression…but, right now, there was no way in hell she could keep the hard exterior up.
She had worked nonstop for three months to get him back. She had only left the base three or four times in that period…but, each time, had returned less than four hours later. She couldn't sleep at home. When she was on the base, she felt like she was close to him…close to finding the answer. Her lab was only a minute away…and so was the gate.
So if he somehow found a way back…
She'd be right there.
But that hadn't been the case. He had been happy on that planet. He had been content to stay there with that…woman…for the rest of his life. He didn't care if he never saw Earth, or Daniel, or Teal'c again.
He hadn't cared if he ever saw her again.
Sam desperately swallowed her tears and continued down the hall at a fast pace. She turned the corner…and almost ran smack into Janet.
"Sam!" The doctor smiled. "I heard the good news! I'm heading down to the infirmary right now, to make sure Colonel O'Neill didn't do too much damage to himself." Her amused smile turned into a frown when she saw Sam's expression. "Sam?"
Sam reluctantly met her friend's concerned gaze. "He was happy there, Janet. He was happy and I took that away from him."
Janet's heart clenched when she heard the raw emotion in her friend's voice. She remembered their little talk from a few months before.
"You miss him." She had phrased it as a statement; not a question. She knew Sam well enough to be able to read some of her emotions. Plus, you had to be blind not to see the way the two officers interacted.
Sam raised her eyebrows and paused for a second. "Yeah." She said it in a 'ya think' voice and Janet fought back a smile. She sounded a lot like Colonel O'Neill.
Janet hated herself for what she said next, but knew she had no choice but to ask. "Is this a problem?" She didn't need to clarify. Sam knew exactly what she meant.
"No. No…of course not." She tried for a smile, but it was forced. Janet frowned slightly…not sure if the major was trying to convince her…or herself. Janet didn't push. Sam was her friend and there was no way in hell she was going to tell her little secret.
Besides…almost everyone on the base knew of the pair's feelings. Except, maybe for the two parties directly involved.
Janet nodded and turned to leave. Sam was already lost in thought. The doctor turned back around and opened her mouth. She wanted to reassure Sam…tell her that he felt the same about her. But, remembering her boundaries…she closed her mouth again and walked away.
"What do you mean he--?" Janet started, but Sam cut her off, already moving around her,
"He met someone, Janet. That's it, okay?" Without waiting for a response Sam hurried away leaving the doctor with a mix of emotions. She wanted to go after Sam and comfort her. But she also wanted to wring the colonel's neck. Or hit him…knock some sense into his head.
Turning, she headed for the infirmary, purpose resonant in every step. What had he done?
……………………………………………………………………………………………
Jack sat on the edge of the cot/bed thing. He never knew what to call it. His legs hung limply and, for once, his hands were still. His eyes were fixed on the floor and everything around him felt dull. His mind was slow and pained. He couldn't get her face out of his head.
Not Lara's. Carter's.
Back in the gateroom…she had looked so hurt. And angry. The second he stepped through the gate and automatically sought her eyes, he had seen her expression dim and she had fled the room. The hurt in her eyes caused his stomach to clench and his heart to twist. He had missed everyone…her…so much. He had finally allowed himself to take a small amount of comfort in another on that planet…but it had been nothing more than that.
He had sought shelter from the pain of being alone. Again. He couldn't bear the thought of never seeing Carter again. Never hearing her laugh or her technobabble…
But he was back. And she couldn't even stand to be in the same room as him.
…………………………………………………………………………………………….
Janet entered the infirmary, only slowing when she saw the distant man sitting on the bed. Anger flared in her, but so did pity.
"Colonel." Janet said stiffly, moving to stand in front of him.
"Doc." He replied, just as emotionless.
Janet hesitated and, upon making a decision, stepped back. "Could I speak with you for a moment, sir? In my office." She spoke the last part firmly, telling him that she meant business.
He glanced up with what could have been a surprised expression…but his eyes were too subdued to be able to tell. He nodded. He really didn't want to talk.
Nevertheless, he followed her into her office and she shut the door with a 'snap' behind them. She motioned for him to sit down and she took her place behind her desk.
Janet took a deep breath. Now that he was here…she had no idea what to say. "You've been gone a long time, colonel." 'Way to state the obvious, Janet.' She silently chastised herself.
He nodded. When it became clear that that was all he had to say, Janet took over again. "Do you know how long?" He shook his head slowly, still not meeting her eyes. "One hundred and six days." Janet said matter-of-factly. She might as well be talking about the weather.
"Oh?" He said dispassionately. "Felt like a lot longer."
Janet pursed her lips. "I'm sure." At her disdainful tone, Jack looked up. There were warring emotions in her eyes. Her expression was cold, but he could tell that she was worried. About what though…he didn't know.
"What's that supposed to mean?" he snapped, his nerves fried.
"Do you know how many times Sam left the mountain in that time?" Janet asked, narrowing her eyes. Without waiting for a reply she said, "Three. And those don't even count because she always came back four hours later."
Jack dropped his eyes to his boots again and refused to let her see anything. 'Dammit, Carter.' He thought. 'No wonder she looked so thin. And pale.'
"She never gave up on you. Even when everyone else did. She was here every night…searching for some way to get you back." Janet paused, sensing that she was starting to rant. She took a deep breath. "Did you even thank her?"
"Thank…?" Jack repeated. Her brow furrowed and he felt his stomach plummet to his shoes. He hadn't thanked her. He had walked away when she tried to explain how they got back. "No." the word tasted heavy and metallic on his tongue. He felt like he was going to be sick.
"No." Janet repeated, pursing her lips again. "She went through hell to get to you…did you know that?" When he glanced up at her, confused, she sighed exasperatedly. "She was called into meetings with the general, the President, and the Joint Chiefs five times in your honor." She spit the last word out sarcastically. "They wanted to officially declare you MIA and scrub the search and rescue."
Jack's mouth went dry. Not because they had come that close to giving up on him…no. Because he could see Carter in his mind's eye; squaring her shoulders and taking a deep breath, steeling herself for the meeting she was about to face. He could see the President's, Hammond's, and Joint Chief's eyes turn to face her, cold and calculating. Well, not Hammond so much…but, still. It pained him to know what political hoops Carter had jumped through for him.
"Most nights she didn't even sleep." Janet continued, still disgusted with the knowledge that he hadn't thanked her. "Just sat in her lab, staring off into space or frantically researching something. We had to remind her to eat. She never gave up on you."
Jack kept his eyes focused on the floor. Carter had been through hell to save his sorry ass. And he had been too shocked at seeing her again…he hadn't even been able to look at her properly. It hurt like hell seeing her, standing there, looking at him with tired, but triumphant eyes. Instead of facing the pain head on…he had chosen the easier path. He had turned away from her.
Janet looked him over. He seemed fine physically…but, emotionally, that was a different story. Her personal feelings at the moment were at war with the "doctor" side of her. She wanted to help her two friends, but she could barely stand to look at the ungrateful colonel. 'Maybe not ungrateful.' Janet mused, still glaring at him. 'In shock. He never expected to come back.'
One of my nurses will give you the check-up." Janet said abruptly, standing up. She walked over to the door and opened it.
Jack stood up and shook his head slowly. Janet's eyes widened. "What do you mean, 'no'?"
"I have somewhere else to be." He muttered and walked slowly towards the infirmary door.
"Colonel--!" Janet started.
"Dammit, Doc!" Jack whirled. His eyes burned with the first emotion he had expressed since stepping through the gate. "I have to make sure she's okay." He spoke quieter.
Janet opened her mouth to order him to stay and be examined, but she changed her mind at the last second. "She'd better be. Or you're going to be in a hell of a lot of trouble, Colonel."
The doctor's eyes flashed. Jack didn't often see the woman angry, but realized that she was intimidating. Not as much so as Carter…but, still.
Jack turned away and headed for the locker room. He needed a shower and a change of clothes before he saw her. After all, wearing the clothes and dirt from the planet just reminded her of what she went through to get him.
TBC
A/N: Part Two up tomorrow. Please R&R!!