A/N: Duncan/M!Cousland. Pre-Ostagar. Hurt/Comfort. Rated M.
K!memers: For ff. net publication, I've fixed some minor "ahm, mechanical" things, typos, and have expanded to the morning after. There may be even more yet but, if so, it will be published under another title.
Thanks go to giant_sequoia of the LJ realm for content beta reading prior to the expansion. Any remaining errors are mine.
This fill is in response to the following k!meme prompt -
"We've seen Duncan deflowering F!Warden on the way to Ostagar but I'd like to see a virgin M!Warden( a million cookies if its Cousland but I wouldn't mind any other origin as long as it's not dwarfs) On the way they are mobbed by a group of Darkspawn and one of them gets injured. Tending to injuries leads to sexy time. Bonus if the (future) Warden knew for some time he's gay but is too embarrassed/shy to act on it and then Duncan (who could be gay or bi-sexual) shows him that there's nothing to be embarrassed about. Duncan can be rough, completely gentle, or a mixture of both. Would like to see snuggles afterword? Manly snuggles? *prays to the annon Gods* I can has please? PLEASE? Pretty please?"
Aedan winced as Duncan pushed the bruised Wilds Flower crown into the open gash below his hip, firmly maintaining the pressure. "This will negate the poison. Ostagar is not far from here thankfully. Once there, we'll find you a mage healer who can patch you up better than I can."
The wound stung but the pain dissipated as the plant's essence took effect. The Warden recruit looked up from his thigh to the man who held it, needlessly, on both sides. His groin tensed, blood flowing to the region for two reasons. Longing affection welled within him, but Aedan said and did nothing.
"Noblemen marry noblewomen and produce noble-born heirs," his father once said, in subtle reference to his "unusual" interest in Dairren.
...Poor, sweet Dairren...
Aedan didn't know what conscripted nobles did, but he suspected the expectation still applied. He decided to ask Duncan about that at another time. At present, with Duncan's hand so close, Aedan was certain the other man had noticed...him. He sighed and looked to horizon. "Your herbalism will counterbalance the poison but will not mend the wound itself. Could we camp here tonight? I hear a stream near by and I should think cleaning it will speed its healing."
Duncan considered the idea and then nodded. "I'll walk you to the water's edge and set up while you bathe." The old Warden pulled Aedan up, putting the younger man's arm over his broad shoulders and stabilizing him with the other arm around his waist. The warrior appreciated the closeness to the rogue...but resigned once more.
Limping with his human crutch to the stream, Aedan suggested a short rock to sit on. Duncan lowered him down but didn't leave to make camp as he said he would. "Is something wrong, Duncan?"
"Perhaps I should stay here. Raising yourself off your perch only to slip and bash your head in seems like a poor way for me to honor your parents."
"I have 'dishonored' h- ...them plenty," Aedan spat, then continued with a grimace, "even while they were...alive."
"How so?"
"It's-it's nothing. You wouldn't understand." His deep brown eyes were boring into him under thick dark brows, surrounded by bronzed skin, skin aged and scarred with life and difficulty...
"Why? Because I'm not noble-born?"
He grunted, then said, "Well, that's a small part of it actually. But not central by any means." Aedan found a rock and tried to skip it over the smooth parts of the flowing water. It didn't work.
"Aedan... There are worse ways to be. Emotionally dishonest among them."
Bryce Cousland's son looked him full in the face. "You...?"
"You see something in me that you desire. Unfortunately for us men, that can be," he paused to choose his words, "outwardly apparent." Duncan knelt down, brushed the errant hair from Aedan's eyes, and placed a gauntleted hand on his cheek before continuing, "It is not wrong to want to be loved."
Duncan kissed his forehead. Aedan's eyes closed, his heart bursting. "Aedan?"
"Yes?" he replied, his voice no more than a whisper.
"The Maker gave all of us beauty and strength. These are gifts expressed differently and can be found everywhere. Sometimes they are clearly separate. But most often, almost entirely, we are a blend of the two. Beauty can be also be fierce, strength also tender. ...The beautiful flower that negated your poison had the strength to do so. Do you see?"
He waited for affirmation but Duncan could tell he wasn't quite following, so he summarized. "When you see the beauty and strength of someone else...man, woman, king, or beggar, Anderfel, or Antivan...please remember that the beauty/strength blend is within you as well," he paused then continued. "And that unique blend is a gift...worth both admiring...and dying for. Agreed?"
The tears had come. Aedan nodded and Duncan hugged him, enjoying how the smooth-faced lad nuzzled his beard and neck.
Around them the music of the stream floated above and beyond them, a hymn in true form.
Duncan broke the hug then playfully splashed Aedan. River water mixed with his tears and dripped down his nose and chin; he smiled broadly and giggled.
The water was cool and clear. His blood flowed faintly away in it, the chill of the stream calming the gash's inflammation. Duncan offered his hand and helped him up. "Can you walk?"
"I think so."
Just in case, Duncan supported him in the same way as before, only (to Aedan's pleasure) closer. Both man's clothes and armor were wet.
Nearing their would-be campsite, Duncan said, "I believe we should sleep on dry bedrolls. Our damp clothes will bake with the heat from the fire. Thankfully, darkspawn are not clever enough to steal them while they do so. It may mean fighting naked if we are attacked in the night though." His smile was not exactly flirting but certainly amused and mischievous.
Aedan's blood fled south again, despite the cold and wet. "I, ahm, I agree on all points. Fighting...naked would be first but I'm...willing to risk it." He looked across to the man's eyes whose twinkled at him.
Duncan tended the firepit while Aedan dealt with the tents as best he could. His gash was open but not bleeding much. His clothes chafed it though and he looked forward to being rid of them. "For two reasons," he thought with a private smile.
The wind whipped his tent about. He tossed and turned with the noise, wincing as he remembered his wound and rolled over again. He didn't hear Duncan approach with his jostling. "Aedan?"
He startled but relaxed with recognition. "Yes, Duncan? Is something wrong?"
"My tent has collapsed and we have a long hike yet ahead of us. ...Would you might if-"
"Please do," Aedan replied immediately.
Duncan entered the tent gingerly. Aedan then uncovered, spreading the bedroll out so Duncan could lay down. The old Warden paused for a moment, appraising at him, before flipping his bedroll and pulling it over them as a blanket.
Aedan breathed heavily, tense with want.
"May I...," Duncan began.
Aedan paused then said, "Yes. I would like that," then to himself, "...Very much." The pulse from his length dulled any pain he felt a moment ago.
Duncan settled in. To Aedan's delighted surprise, his arm wound around his waist. He felt Duncan's breath behind his ear, his fuzzy chest hair on his back, his hand low on his abdomen, his warm...erection...near...
"Duncan?"
"Yes?" he asked, pulling back slightly, to Aedan's dismay.
"I've, um...I've always...known...but I haven't...you know...actually..."
"I see," responded the older man without moving.
"If things go badly tomorrow...well..."
Duncan's hand slowly went lower down the wispy trail of Aedan's stomach to where the hair thickened and curled. Grazing his hip, Aedan started.
"Is this alright?"
"Yes. But my injury..."
"Shh. ...Would it hurt to kneel?"
Wordlessly, Aedan rose to do so.
Duncan shed the cover as Aedan had and maneuvered behind him. He spit on his hand then, tentatively, massaged Aedan's ring while lightly stroking his back. Aedan shivered.
"This will pinch a little at first," he said, easing a finger in. Aedan's breath hitched and Duncan caressing his back more firmly. After a few pumps, Aedan relaxed.
A second finger entered, another caught breath, more distracting gropes. Then a third finger. Aedan was getting the hang of this, even pushing back a little onto him. Then Duncan touched something that made Aedan's soul shrink to his heart in pleasure.
He groaned and Duncan chuckled, kissing the small of his recruit's back. "I think you are ready."
Duncan stood on his knees behind him. "Do you have a clean armor shammy in your pack?" he asked. Aedan flexed forward, retrieved one, and handed it to him over his shoulder with a quizzical look. Duncan said reassuringly, "For your hip."
"Ah."
Duncan spit once more, coated himself, then cautiously entered. Aedan gritted his teeth while Duncan shallowly pumped. Aedan hoped he'd find that spot again soon.
"Aedan?"
"Uh, ow, yes?"
"I'd like to try something. Could you lend back against me? Like as though you were sitting on your heels?"
Aedan gingerly complied. Duncan's length slid further in, brushing the electric place within him and Aedan gasped. Duncan's hand moved from Aedan's hip to lightly stroking his cock, his chest hair again tickling Aedan's back. Aedan felt the flow of blood pounding in his ears. He pushed back onto Duncan and jolted from the intensity. He repeated this several more times and felt himself starting to sweat. Duncan joined him with his own thrusts, disregarding the shammy to pull Aedan deeper onto him by his shoulder and hip.
He clawed for the cord of Duncan's shoulder with one hand while feverishly reaching for his ass with the other. "Closer, somehow, close-," he thought. His gash might have stung but he didn't care. The soft friction of Duncan's chest hair on his back was...words...failing...
Duncan pushed him forward unexpectedly into the grass, driving him hard and fast, pounding into him mercilessly. Both were fighting for air. Then Aedan's head seemed to implode as he came, the clinch of him pulling Duncan over the edge soon after.
Panting, and slowly returning to himself, Aedan noticed with relief that his issue was on the grass near his bedroll. Duncan pulled him back close to himself, kissed and unintentionally tickled his clammy neck, then tried to exit. Aedan clinched hard around him; he wanted him inside him still. That and he didn't want to dribble on his still relatively clean bedroll. Recalling the shammy, he found it and gave it to Duncan who cleaned himself off.
He sighed and turned to look into Duncan's eyes. His gaze was returned and again the other man was brushing hair out of his face. Duncan leaned in and kissed him. "Rest now, dear one. We have a long road ahead of us yet."
With that, Duncan set down the shammy, laid down, and tugged Aedan to follow. Not feeling or caring about the pain anymore, Aedan lay on his side, facing him, and burrowed his face into Duncan's beard and chest. Duncan pulled the other bedroll back over them, entwined his legs with Aedan's, and pulled him close.
Outside, the stream sung, giggled, eventually shushed, as the men cuddled tightly until sleep claimed them.
Aedan woke up tangled in the bedroll and alone. Panic gripped him. But then he smelled...breakfast? He exited his tent and squinted. The morning was bright and little birds were fussing overhead.
Duncan, opposite him across the firepit, said, "Good morning, dear one." He smiled then continued, "I took the liberty of making breakfast. There's water there; it's been boiled and should be cooled by now."
"When did you get up?" Aedan asked, stretching.
Duncan watched him then remembered that he was asked a question. "Oh, a few hours, I'd guess. Bad dreams..." His voice trailed off, deep in thought.
Concerned, Aedan asked, "What were they about?"
He looked at him with a pained expression, then said, "...Perhaps another time." Trying to brighten, he offered, "Come, please eat. How did you sleep?"
Aedan shot him a coy look while he chewed and replied, "It was the best sleep I've ever had."
Duncan smiled at the implied compliment. "I'm glad to hear it. ...I've packed everything but your tent. Oh, and your clothes are there."
"Actually, Duncan, if there's time, I'd like to bathe. Who knows when we'll next get the opportunity? That and it would be inappropriate to meet King Cailan in this state."
Duncan's brow arched in intrigue. "How is your hip?"
"Fine."
"That is excellent news."
Aedan recovered, "Of course, there's always I chance I could bash my head in on the rocks..."
Duncan tilted his head and smiled up at his recruit. He rose, doused the fire with his water, and shed his clothes. Aedan threw two towels over his shoulder. They walked hand-in-hand to the water and waded in. Splashing, kissing, and groping...
The river carried their laughter onward and upward. It was a time Duncan knew he'd always cherish, even into the lonely darkness that lay always ahead of him.
"Maker, please, let him survive it. ...No matter what happens, please watch over him until we are together again."