Just a small story that came to mind one grey afternoon. There is some talk about rape and some drunken people.

Hope you like it.

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"Colonel Sheppard!" A blond woman walked toward him in the corridors of Atlantis.

"Dr. Heigtmayer!" He stopped waiting for her to catch up with him. "What can I do for you?" His face masked with a neutrally expression.

"It's about Dr. Sara Field, Colonel." Kate came to a holt in front of him. "I am in need of some help."

John nodded and gestured with his eyes for her to continue.

"I'm having trouble with her to come to sessions after that incident on PX9-643."

"She is not a marine, Doc. I can't make her." John shifted his weight from one foot to the other.

"I know. I just thought that maybe you could talk to her. I have heard she likes you quite well, and you know…"

Johns brows shot up in surprise.

"I can't help you Dr. Heigtmeyer. I'm sorry." John walked away.

Dr. Kate Heigtmeyer watched him walk away, wondering what to do with Dr. Sara Field.

-----

Two days later John was on his way to the rec room. It was movie night, he stopped when he saw a shadow of a woman standing outside the door. It looked like she wanted to run away, but couldn't. John walked stealthily closer and stood behind her. He recognized her as Dr. Sara Field. She looked pale, scared and ashamed at the same time.

John wondered what to do, when he suddenly heard the voices from the rec room.

"Oh. That's Dr. Field. She must be a good ride, now that she had proper training." One man said.

"Heard she was a virgin before they got her." A second one added.

"I guess she knows how to suck a cock properly." A third one said. And then he heard laughter.

Sara suddenly walked backwards, crashing into John. She looked shocked to the core that he had heard as well. Tears was welling up in her eyes as she ran away from him and towards her quarters. John opened the door to the rec room and quickly found the source of the laughter.

"Get up!" John was standing in front of the three men.

"Sir?" The three men looked up at Colonel Sheppard. And when they saw the deadly cold look in his eyes they got up on their feet as quick as they could.

"Having fun? On behalf of Dr. Field?" His voice was cold as steel. The other people in the room was quiet. Almost none of them had seen Colonel Sheppard like this before. Normally he was just the cocky guy who made a joke about everything. Not like this man who looked like an expressionless mercenary with deadly cold eyes who looked like he was ready to kill someone.

"Colonel Sheppard. Didn't…" John held up his hand, silencing them.

"She heard you. Every single word. I really hope your 'fun' was worth it. My office tomorrow morning 0600 hours. Now get out of my sight!"

The three marines obeyed immediately. Almost running out the door. John stood there in silence for a while. He then cleared his voice. Everyone was looking at him.

"I won't tolerate this kind of behavior from anyone. Have I made myself clear!"

A lot of 'yes, sir' could be heard from around the room.

Then he turned around and left. He had a plan to help Dr. Field. He owed it to her after the way his men had treated her.

-----

"Colonel Sheppard to Dr. Heightmeyer."

"This is Dr. Heightmeyer." Kate sounded surprised.

"I'll help you with Dr. Field. But it's going to happened now. You ready?"

"Em.. yes. What do you want me to do?"

"Get to your office and wait for my call. Sheppard out."

John walked towards the control room. He spotted Chuck and sight with relief. He was a guy who could be trusted.

"Chuck. I need a favor." John said as he ran up the stairs.

"What do you need, Colonel." Chuck could see that something serious was bothering the Colonel.

"I need a secure cannel between myself and Dr. Heightmeyer. I can't have anyone else listening in on the conversation. Can you do that?"

"No problem, Colonel."

Then there was the final piece of the plan. He needed something from Teyla.

A few minutes later he chimed the door to Teylas room. She appeard seconds later.

"John! You know it's girls poker night."

"Yes, and I'm sorry to disturb you. It's very important." Teyla could see the look in his eyes and knew that he was serious.

"What can I do for you?" Teyla laid a hand on his arm.

"I'm helping Dr. Heightmeyer with Dr. Field. And the only way I know how to help is to get her drunk."

"You need some of the athosian ruus wine?" Teyla nodded.

"Yes. If you don't mind" John looked relived that she understood without further explanation.

"I'll get a bottle for you."

Know he was ready. With the bottle in his hand he found the door to Sara Fields room.

"Chuck! Sheppard here. You ready?"

"Patching you through to Dr. Heightmeyer on a secure channel."

"Dr. Heightmeyer?" John was nervous now.

"Colonel Sheppard. I'm in my office now. What do you want me to do?"

"Just hold the line, Doc. This might take all night though."

"Good luck, John."

-----

John didn't bother knocking. He overrode the door control and walked into the room.

"Dr. Field?" John asked.

"Colonel Sheppard? What are you doing in here?" She looked frightened. John stood in her doorway.

"Taking you out for a drink."

"What?" She now only looked confused.

"You, me, athosian wine, south pier. In other words, we're getting drunk." He gestured to the wine.

"What?" John didn't think she could get more confused, but she did.

"It's how you deal with stuff you don't want to talk about." John tried to explain.

"Drunk?" Sara was just staring at the wine.

"Yes! Finally you got it." John pushed her out the door.

A long moment of silence went by.

"Just so you know. I'm not talking about it." Sara stole a glance at John.

"Good, neither am I." John smiled inside as he sat down on the edge of the pier. He opened the wine and took a sip from the bottle. Then he handed it over to Sara.

"Colonel…"

"A.. Rule number one. First names only. I'm John, you're Sara. Second rule. Drink!" John said.

"And number three?" Sara said as she took a sip of the bottle.

"Don't spit in the bottle." John gave her one of his famous smirks.

"I'll try not to. This is good." She smiled shyly.

"I know. Got it from Teyla." John said.

Half an hour went by. Both sat in silence passing the bottle between them. Sara looked at Sheppard for a moment, he was swinging his legs and had his eyes closed.

"I can't talk to Heightmeyer about it." Sara suddenly said eying him carefully. John still had his eyes closed.

"Why not? She is a shrink."

"She doesn't know what it's like. She was never…" Sara swallowed hard.

"Raped." John added quietly. "You should talk to someone who knows what it's like." John stated neutrally.

"Yeah, I could. But it's not like anyone will stand up and say 'Hey, I got raped too, feel like talking about it?'"

John huffed out something between a laugh and breath.

"What's so funny?" Sara looked at him angrily.

John looked at her. This was not the way he thought it would go, but he needed her to talk. And this might be the only way.

"I'm not getting up on my feet, I'm too drunk. But hey I got raped too, feel like talking about it?" John locked eyes with Sara. At first she thought it was a bad joke, but in his eyes she could see that he was telling the truth.

Sara was quiet for a long time. "How? When? Why?" Sara had tears in her eyes.

John smirked, but his eyes revealed a long forgotten pain. "I'll tell you, if you'll tell me?" It was a challenge.

"You go first." Sara told him sternly. Johns nod was almost invisible. He took a sip of the bottle before he handed it over.

"Me and some friends were out celebrating. We were going somewhere to the middle east. Our first assignments as pilots. Got way too drunk, and lost track of my friends.

Then I ran into some marines, 3 big guys. They started harassing me, being a flyboy and all, said something about not having enough experience to fight for our country."

John was quiet for a while, then continued.

"One of them said something about me being too pretty as well. Then they started knocking me around, next thing I know I'm naked in an empty warehouse, those three brutes having way with me. I honestly thought they were killing me. God, it hurt." John wiped away a tear. "I don't know how long they fucked me, but eventually I passed out. When I woke up again I was alone." John took an other sip of the bottle.

"Your turn." John stated flatly.

Sara took the bottle from John and took a sip. "Risak locked me away in one of the huts." She continued her tale about the rape, and her feelings around it. When she was finished she cried on Johns shoulder.

"I'm sorry, Sara." John held her close.

"Me too." Sara hulked. "So did you get over it?" She said after a while.

"You don't. It's always there. You just have to focus on the things you like the most. For me, that's flying. There are good days and then there are bad days. And by the looks of this bottle…" He took a big sip. "Tomorrow is going to be a really, really bad one…"

Sara laughed out loud.

"You know, I think maybe I'll be ok…, in time.." Sara looked at the sunrise.

John nodded. "You will be. I'm sure. And just so you know." Sara looked at him. "this stays between you and me. And Dr. Heightmeyer." He finished off quietly.

the end.