hmm ... i`m just pooping these out like no tomorrow, aren`t i? trololol ~ this is my third one in just a week. IT`S CRAAAYZEEE. the sad thing is, i have, like, two other ones in mind. :I

disclaimer: i own nothing. if only, if only ...

Sometimes keeping a relationship a secret is difficult. If anyone were to know that, it`d be James Diamond and Carlos Garcia, and they know it all too well. They`ve been together for quite a while, about two years, and no one knew. It was okay that no one knew because it wasn`t exactly on the top of their priorities to let everyone know. Something like this is just something to keep to themselves, at least for now.

They were fourteen when those little signs of crushing were apparent to them both. Glances at each other became longer and more frequent, James` hand would linger on Carlos` shoulder after getting a pat saying, "Good job!" or "Oh my God, dude! Awesome!" Carlos would always grin just a little wider, a little brighter, at the taller teen. He would stand or sit just a little closer than usual, "accidentally" touch knees while they`re sitting – things like that. Both of them knew that the other had feelings, but neither said anything, not at first. It was too weird for them to admit. They were two boys crushing on each other. At that age, they didn`t even know why they were feeling what they were, especially to another guy. Sure, girls were still pretty and all that, but none of them really had the same effect as Carlos did on James and vice versa. So, since they were so quiet about it, neither of them really asked, "Will you go out with me?" What made it official for them was the day their hockey team had won their last game of the season. No, they didn`t get first place or anything ( they finished third, which was still pretty kick ass ), but that`s not what mattered. All of them were still psyched they had ended it with an amazing win.

James and Carlos were the last ones in the locker room that day. It always takes James longer to get cleaned up and ready than everyone else, so it was only natural for him to be there. Pretty was kind of his thing. It was a necessity that he be "more attractive than anyone else." Now Carlos. on the other hand, was there because he and James were best friends, and being the best friend, he didn`t want to see James in there all by himself, so he stuck around. Company is always nice, even if the company won`t stop talking. Most of the time, the taller just ignored the chattering, since it was a normal thing for the Latino to do after a victory ( not that he wasn`t chatty in the first place. it was just worse after things like that. ).

There was silence in the locker room after a while. Carlos had finally shut up and it was just that awkward kind of silence, and god did Carlos want to break it. It was killing him trying to stop himself for talking anymore than he already has. He was pretty sure James was getting annoyed with him, and oddly enough, he wasn`t, but it`s hard to get annoyed with something you weren`t really listening to in the first place. As badly as he wanted to say something, he didn`t, because he really didn`t know what else he could possibly say. The poor boy had talked himself dry. It was alright though, because after so many grueling seconds of silence, James had finally broken it by asking, "Does my hair look great or what?" Sure, it was a rhetorical question and aimed at himself more than Carlos, but it might as well been an invitation for Carlos to grab the taller`s shirt and sloppily bring their lips together. That was their first time kissing anybody, and it wasn`t exactly like it was in the movies, and it didn`t help that neither of them knew what they were doing other than just pressing lips, but it was fantastic all the same. "You always look great," Carlos had answered after, his cheeks a subtle pink and his head hanging slightly, embarrassed and just what the hell did he just do. James was pretty much just as stunned as he was, but the small smile that graced both of their faces after it had all sunk in was more than enough to cover up that feeling. What Carlos said was insanely cliché and they both knew it, and it didn`t even matter. That was all they needed.

Being in Minnesota, it wasn`t very difficult to keep their new relationship under wraps. Kendall had his job to keep him occupied, Logan was busy studying or visiting Kendall, and everyone else didn`t seem to be too much of a threat. They were the only two people the couple had been worried about finding out, aside from Katie and Mrs. Knight. As long as the opportunities they had to sneak off together and go see a movie or hang out at the arcade while the others were busy, they were okay. Inside, they knew there was probably something suspicious about the way they would interact, but no one was arsed enough to look into it or even care, and hey, it just made everything all the more easier.

Now that they were in The Palm Woods, everything was different. Things were definitely harder to keep on the down low, since the four of them were together pretty much all day everyday. Yeah, it was a great bonding experience for all of them, but it`s not like they really dislike being apart. Some serious alone time was severely over due, and there is more certainly a such thing as getting too much of a person. Yeah, they get breaks everyday, but they`re not as long as they hope to be. And, yeah, maybe it`s a bit of an over – exaggeration, but it sure seems like there`s never enough time for just the two of them. Group activities were pretty much a given, not that James and Carlos really minded. Sometimes it was just annoying. It`s just something you have to deal with though.

At the end of the day, when it`s time to sleep, that`s really the only time the two could have together in private. Of course, they didn`t do too much out of fear of accidentally outing themselves. Usually they just talked and cuddled for a while, a kiss here and there. Nothing too extravagant. Logan and Kendall probably wouldn`t like it too much if they were woken up by them either. No one really wants to be woken up by someone else`s intimacy.

Though, Kendall and Logan aren`t exactly innocent in that category either. It wasn`t that much of a secret that they were in some kind of intimate relationship. Whether it was boyfriend/boyfriend status or if it was just plain friends with benefits, it was a mystery and will forever stay that way. Don`t ask, don`t tell. They like to keep their actions a secret from the public and Kendall`s family too, but they could really care less if James and Carlos knew. The four of them have been friends for far too long to let something like that bother each other. All of this was bound to happen anyway. Even knowing that, James and Carlos didn`t feel any need to tell anyone about them. What would they get out of it? Sometimes it sucked not being able to do things "together", sure, but P.D.I. isn`t their kind of thing in the first place.

In all actuality, they loved being secret. There was something so thrilling about it, the chance of being caught was always lingering in the air. Their hearts would beat just a little faster, their breaths would come out the slightest bit faster in shorter huffs. Kisses were more frantic and it made everything all kinds of exciting. Nothing else was able to make them react in such a way.

Of course, the most exciting thing about it all was the sex, which is exciting in and of itself, but when you add in the element of being secret, things get turned up to a whole new level. Secret sex. Usually when someone hears that, they automatically think of a night of cheating, doing the nasty with someone they really shouldn`t be. When it came to James and Carlos, it was totally different, obviously. Whenever they wanted to do something, they would have to go off and find somewhere they could retreat to. Hiding places were scarce and more often than not, cramped and uncomfortable, but the moment Carlos` breath was on James` neck and palming in areas that made him instantly light headed, nothing else mattered. That same mouth that was on his neck would slowly move to his earlobe, nibbling in the slightest way, and god did Carlos know all the right places to touch, and how he would "accidentally" press their hips together. Damn, was Carlos ever a tease. He was the best at going just far enough to drive James crazy in all the right ways. The feeling of nails against the Latino`s skin, his short, black hair being tugged in the gentlest way, covering each other`s mouths, biting lips to keep from being too loud; all of it was unlike anything else. One of the things Carlos loved the most about doing those kinds of things was that stomach dropping feeling he would get every single time. To know that there was someone in the world had the ability to do such enticing things was mind blowing, but everything about James was like that.

The moments after everything was said and done, when they were out of breath, stumbling out of where ever it was they were hiding to plop down on one of their beds, ready to pass out in each other`s arms, were the ones that made having to hide everything worth it. How they were never caught like that was beyond then, and it wasn`t the first thing on their list of worries either. Maybe Logan and Kendall already knew about them. Somehow, they`re perfectly okay with that. Good for those two if they have figured it out. It`s one less thing to have to worry about, less people to tell if and when they decide to reveal themselves.

Maybe someday James and Carlos will feel comfortable with telling the world about their relationship. They can`t possibly keep it a secret forever, right? For now, they`re just perfectly content with being secret lovers, enjoying and savoring those moments they have to themselves. What`s life without a few secrets anyway?