I sat at a disk in my room with a piece of pink paper sitting in front of me; it's been a couple of months since the whole Jonah thing and its still bugging me. Yeah at the time it didn't bug me I was used to it by now I mean it was Carly beautiful, funny. Perfect Carly and I was Sam the bully who loves ham and I'm cool with that that is the way I like and intend to keep it but just because I like everything the way it is and that I don't mind coming second best to Carly doesn't mean that I don't have feelings and don't get effected by the way everyone falls at Carly's feet and I'm just her side kick. So as the only person I would go to with a problem like this is the person I have problem with I decided I would write my thoughts and feelings down on this sheet. Of paper then go down to the beach put the note in a bottle and let it float away and maybe my troubles would flout away with it cliché I know but hey I have no other choice so zip.
So here it goes this is really weird but anyhow I'm desperate so I'm going to be all girly and emotional for the next three minutes and then you are going in the bottle and floating away with my troubles and no-one will ever know this happened!
This is so stupid why do I even care I mean Jonah wasn't that great really was he? I only dated him because he seemed generally interested in me and not Carly for a change! Right? God who am I kidding of course I liked him and it really felt awful! At the start I felt like I deserved it and that it was God's way of punishing me for the way I treat people but was convinced other wise!
That brings me to Freddie, a couple of weeks after the whole dilemma I was staying at Carly's I just couldn't get to sleep so I was down on her couch in a pair of old shorts and my younger brothers Lakers jersey watching a repeat of Ricky lake it always seems to make my life seem slightly more normal hell it makes me and my family look normal!
I needed to get this of my chest it was eating away at me so I text the last person I thought I would ever turn to... the dork! A simple text saying are you up and within two minutes there was a knock at Carly's door only loud enough for me to hear yet faint enough to go unnoticed by Carly and Spencer, I opened the door with a confused expression wiped across my features, my once bright blue eyes a watery gray and my earlier bouncy blonde curls draped loosely and limp around me, there standing in sweat pants and bare from the torso up was a rather dazed tired and confused looking Freddie he simply said you needed me in a husky low voice and that was me I broke down tears trailing down my cheeks and my body trembling insecurely he closed the door behind him before he reached out pulling me close letting me sob in his bare chest letting his fingers get tangled in my hair as he tried to sooth me I don't know how I got there but not long after I was curled up in Freddie's arms on the sofa just letting every thing flow out of me telling him everything from the Jonah stuff right down to the Carly thing he was the one who convinced me that It wasn't my fault about Jonah and he was just a Jerk and I should just wipe it out of my mind he then presided to tell me that yea Carly was pretty but that I was beautiful and that yea Carly was funny but that I was hilarious and that no Carly wasn't perfect and no neither was I but perfection is some thing that is impossible for anything to be especially a human being and that is how I fell asleep in Freddie's arms his words running through my head that's the night I got myself confidence back it was also the night I fell for none other than the dork!
I remember waking up that day feeling something move under my weight and letting out a soft content sigh before the steady in and out movement of his chest reassumed and the arm around my waist pulled me in closer. I nestled my head into his neck ready to go back to sleep like him before he mumbled he should get home before his mother had a panic attack when he wasn't in his bed. I giggled at this before asking could he not stay for a wee bit longer he rubbed my hip with his hand slightly before replying no he stood up lifting me with him and setting me on the couch again were I curled up and drift back to my slumber I vaguely remember him murmuring something in my ear before kissing my forehead although I don't remember what and I was that tired that I didn't really care what he said I breathed a thank you as he reached the door he chuckled a your welcome before adding if you need me text me I laughed before shouting a tried yea yeah see ye later dork!
So now you can see its not just Jonah and carly that's getting to me I'm freaking in love with Freddie! And it hurts even more than the Jonah thing! Every time I see him send those puppy dog eyes in Carly's
direction I feel the same pang of hurt I felt through the whole Jonah thing and the Ironic thing that he probably is the one person that knows exactly how it feels as he feels it every time he sees Jake and Carly. Every time I see Freddie I feel my self fall that little bit harder! Every time I'm around him I feel my stomach doing summer salts, every time he touches me it sends a shiver cursing through my body and I can feel my self going in a downwards spiral that doesn't seem to be stopping soon and by the stage I have stopped I will have fallen even further!
So dear whoever is reading this letter wish me luck... I Samantha Puckett am going to let someone in so if you've read this... congrats you've just found a message in a bottle and well I guess thank you for listen
Bye
Sam XxXxXx
I am now standing down on the beach, wriggling my toes in the soft, warm sand letting the sea lap up around my feet holding my converse in one hand and an empty bottle of Budweiser belonging to Spencer with my letter interlaying in it in the other, I stood in one of Freddie's old ACDC tops I stole to sleep in and a pair of skinny leg jeans watching the moon bobbing of the sea. I took in the familiar smell of dorkiness from my T-shirt which I had come accustomed to mixed with the smell of the sea water salt I gazed down at the bottle wondering weather I was ready to let everything go yet or weather I wanted to cling on for a wee while longer as I was so caught up in my on thoughts I didn't realise there was someone behind me until I felt that comforting rub at my hip and that minty cool breath on my neck breathing hi, I let out a slight giggle before turning around to become face to face with Freddie are faces inched closer our lips almost touching before I look down blushing thank god Its dark! That is when the bottle catches his eye:
"Hey Sam what's that?" he questioned me touching me arm softly I glanced down at the bottle before bending down letting it flow away with the waves before turning back around to him letting my lips brush with his and saying:
"Nothing, nothing at all" and backing away from him leaving the beach in both embarrassment and relief letting my troubles truly wash away with my bottle and it felt great letting it go!
I walked into my apartment building with a large grin playing on my lips the adrenalin rushing through my body I skipped past the elevator (literally) and jumped up the stairs two by two giggling with every step I took I opened my apartment door to be welcomed by the comforting emptiness as my brother and mum were out of town! I through my keys on the stand by the door before running out to the kitchen and pushing play on my radio and started dancing around the apartment before running on to my bedroom and jumping on my bed more like leaping but anyway I was in the middle of an air guitar when I tripped forward on my bed and landed on me back on the floor I cracked up laughing screaming
"I Kissed Freddie!" and laughing even harder I repeated this letting my voice decrease lower and lower until the content of what had just happened hit me by that stage my voice was barely made out as a whisper
"Shit I kissed Freddie!" I groaned before slapping my head and the adrenalin that I once felt turned into an embarrassed feeling settling down in the pit of my stomach I reluctantly let all the scenarios which could unfold run through my head I got up leaning against the foot of the bed running my hands through my hair letting silent tears fall down my cheeks.
I had finally calmed myself down and stopped crying when there was a knock at the door; I got up from my position on the floor shuffling towards the door with the odd hiccup every now and then as a result of crying to hard I opened the door to revel a once again dazed and confused looking Freddie.
"Freddie, I just completely embarrassed myself there now, yeah we will talk about it but at the moment I'd just like to drown my sorrows over a packet of ham" I sniffled rubbing my nose and going to close the door before I had the chance Freddie held the door open with his right hand and holding up a familiar looking bottle with thee other.
"I found your message!" he exclaimed softly looking me dead in the eye. I could see there was a look of hope behind them of what he was hoping for I do not fully understand.
"You went and got that after I told you it was no..." I started being interrupted by Freddie lips crashing on mine pushing me through the arch of the door up against the wall behind me closing the door with his foot. It started out as a timid kiss which could nearly have been shared between friends before his lips started to move against mine. Mine also in sync with his, I tugged on his bottom lip slightly impatient with his kissing pace begging for entrance to his mouth, he laughed softly into the kiss before backing away slightly.
"Typical!" he laughed while stroking my wet sticky cheek "You have to take the lead, please let me control you somehow!" he retorted kind heartedly I blushed smiling slightly looking at the floor I was pushed up right against the wall now and Freddie right up against me so close that a credit card could barely be squeezed between us. He pushed his forehead against mine before bending down and capturing my lips picking the pace up a wee bit although still not deepening it. I officially think he is trying to kill me letting me get so far then teasing me! His hands moving silkily down to my hips were I like to have them the most he then pulled me closer to him so that our hips were pushed together he moved his lips away from my lips to my neck were I let a breathy moan I felt him smile against my neck before kissing his way back to my lips were he softly started to nibble on my bottom lip I let my fingers have I tighter grip around the neck of his hoddy were they had been placed. My lips slowly parted letting his tongue travel into my mouth playing chase with mine he moved his hands from their comfy position at my hips to slid down my legs were he tightened the grip some how lifting me up and wrapping my legs around his waist I let out a slight squeal before laughing and reconsuming kissing Freddie yep that's right Freddie and not only is he kissing back he initiated the kiss!
Freddie started moving backwards still kissing me and holding me tightly around his waist the kiss had turned in to a slight mixture of coconut lip balm and salty tears I don't know how are why but I had began to cry again my hands had move around to positions themselves around his neck and my fingers getting tangled in his hair.
"Were too?" Freddie questioned while his lips were still attached to mine I let out a slight giggle then mumbled my response against his lips.
"The bedroom?" he questioned me slightly unsure of himself that just give me the urge to let out a slight giggle
"Yes the bedroom" I giggled backing my lips away from Freddie's to get a breath and then pushing my forehead against his with a smile playing on my lips I could see Freddie was beginning to feel slightly nervous before he give me a questioning look.
"Are you sure that we should really go in to your bedroom?" he asked walking backwards in to the leaving room.
"Yea why not?" I demanded did he really think I was going to go that far with him that easily? "AWW does wee Fweddie's mommy not allow him in gwils bedwooms?" I mocked him in my best baby voice sniffling every now and then hoping that he wouldn't catch on that I was really sniffling.
"GrRr!" screamed Freddie which slightly startled me and I was very aware that my safety depended on him and that he could let go of me at any time and it was starting to scare me having to depend in on some one for support and that was what was going to be like in real life depended on Freddie for support when I needed it and I had never had to do that before or liked to do that before not even with Carly god I'm confused! "This is going to be one screwed up relationship isn't it?" he laughed I looked up at him sniffling and removing one of my hands to whip away a tear that I hadn't even realised was there! And laughed along with him before he tripped ova the matt in the leaving room I let out a shrill shirk before I landed on top of Freddie on the floor beside the coffee table banging head with Freddie's.
I sat up on top of him with my curly blonde hair swarmed around my face I giggled once again blowing my curls out of my face mumbling how I had been making it a habit of fallen to day and rubbing my head. Below me I heard Freddie chuckling and pushing my curls back out of my face.
"Sam Puckett I think I may just love you!" he smiled up at me I lowered my lips to him sharing yet another salty coconut flavoured he cupped my cheeks in his hands. It's true what they talk about in them romance novels you know you do get
that fuzzy warm unexplainable feeling in your stomach when some one says they love you for the first time, the weird thing is it wasn't the first time he had said it to me I finally realize what he muttered in my ear that morning, he had said he loved me,
I smiled into the kiss before pulling back and whispering back a very hushed "I love you too Fredork"