A/N: This is dedicated to the memory of Sirius Black. It's about Remus and how he deals.
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the HP characters
I picked up my school scrapbook and flipped through the pages. When I had graduated from Hogwarts the pages had been full. Full of memories of my best friends, my family, and other things. Now the pages had more empty spaces. It seemed like the more time past, the more pictures I took out of that old scrapbook. I figured at the rate I was going that in about 2 years the scrapbook would be full of nothing. As soon as I found the page I had wanted, I laid the scrapbook on the table. I then went into my room and began to rummage through my closet. After a couple minutes of looking, I found it.
It was my memorial box. It was a box my grandmother had given me on my fifth birthday to use. Two years later I had decided to use it to remember people when my grandma had died. Whenever someone would die, I would put pictures, letters from them, and other stuff into the box. I picked up the box and carried it into the main room.
I then took out some of my favorite pictures from the scrapbook page that was open and put them in the box. After that I took some of the letters and put them in the box too. I was glad I was almost done because it always was painful doing this. I finished off by taking some stuff that he had given me and added them to the box.
I closed the memorial box, laid it on my coffee table, and put the scrapbook back in my room. Then I sat down on old couch and began to wonder when this would all be over. "Padfoot," I said to no one in particular," I know you used to tease me about the scrapbook. I remember how you would say it was more like a photo album. I will miss you saying that. Don't worry 'bout Harry, I will try my best to watch over him."
I closed my eyes to keep the tears from coming down but it didn't help. All I could think about the past few days was how Sirius was gone. How I had lost three best friends within 14 years--two by death and one who might as well be dead. My memorial box so far contained my parents, James, Lily, my sister, my grandparents, and now Sirius. I hated having to put memories of people who died in the box but it was the only way I felt that they could be remembered properly.
Sirius used to joke around about my memorial box. He said it was my way of trying to forget about the deaths of people who were the closest to me. We used to spend hours heatedly discussing the best way to remember someone dear to you. Somtimes I even wonder if stuffing all my memories in a box is wrong.
Should I keep everything in its regular spot or put those memories in a spot where I can easily access them when I want to have a good time? That was always the question I've asked myself. For me its easier to keep everything in the box. To an outsider it may seem as if I'm trying to wipe away the memory of those who are gone but in reality I'm trying my best to remember them.
I guess the hardest part was picking a few things to say about the person who just died. That was my mum's idea. She told me that when someone I was close to had died that I should say a few things that I missed most about him or her. I could always name tons of things that I missed most about Padfoot. Like our Hogwarts adventures or how he would always help Harry. I know he would walk a mile just to save Harry. I also know that its got to be hurting Harry as bad as its hurting me.
I guess the thing I'll miss the most is how Sirius was adventurous and always willing to take a risk. I took a deep breath and said the last part of my memorial service and the part that I believed meant the most. " Padfoot, I'll miss you immensely and I'll never forget you."
Maybe someday I'll give the box to Harry so he can have it. All I know is I almost have put everyone I knew and cared about in the memorial box. Almost but not quite. I know he'd love looking at all my memories of James and Sirius. Who knows. He might continue on the tradition I started at the age of seven. All that's left is Hope.