As always, I own nothing. All elements used in this story belong to J.K. Rowling and any other creators mentioned. This story will feature smut, but I don't plan on it being as graphic as some of my other fics.

Xxxx

Oh my heart,

My beating heart,

Keeps me coming back to you,

- Oh My Heart by National Park Radio

Xxxx

A scent akin to almonds swirled around him, riding on silver puffs of smoke. Tendrils of the steam that billowed from the potion in front of Severus tickled at his skin, pulling him back into the past as it did every year. Within it, he could pick out the light, airy scent of asphodel mingling with that of the English Laurel, and finally the dusty scent of graphite. He drowned himself in the intoxicating smell, letting it flow through him and awaken memories he had long forgotten.

Focusing his eyes back on the simmering potion before him, he wiped away the moment of weakness and rooted himself in the present. Dozens of eyes stared back at him expectantly, each student quiet and sitting with rapt attention. It was his favorite class to teach, filled with only those that wished to be there.

In this room, gone was the ineptitude of the classes before them, the childish behavior and subpar answers. The people who sat before him now possessed a knowledge, a desire, that should they dedicate themselves to their work, they could hope to achieve his level of skill. It was a shame that so few ever did. Only a handful of past students making a career out of this work and none with the same love for potions as he.

"Should you have listened to my previous instruction and completed your summer reading," He glared at each of them in turn. "I expect that each of you could tell me the name of the potion inside the copper cauldron."

The majority of hands rose slowly into the air, each hesitant about their answer, or rather his reaction. His eyes narrowed in on one boy in particular, one of the few that hadn't tried to give an answer. "Pinner?"

The snub nosed, mousey haired boy lifted his head, not fully meeting Severus' eyes. He was a timid Hufflepuff, never offering an answer of his own volition. Beneath his hazel eyes however, lurked a wealth of knowledge Severus so rarely encountered. "A-amortentia, Sir."

The left corner of Severus' lips twitched in satisfaction and the boy straightened further on his stool. His shoulders rolled back in slight confidence. He opened his mouth again, knowing his professor expected an explanation after five previous years inside the dingy classroom. "It's the most powerful…"

Severus felt a zing run across his wrist, caught a glimmer of light from the corner of his eye. He dropped his sight, training his eyes on the sleeve that concealed his wand when it happened again. A lone, blue spark wormed its way from beneath the fabric of his clothes. The voice of Merton Pinner had faded, only reaching his ears in murmurs.

Xxxx

Severus stepped from the fireplace, wand raised. His eyes, as intense and dark as a night sky, were narrowed as they fell on the belongings of his Cokeworth home. He scanned the windows, the doors, looking for a sign of the forced entry his wand had alerted him to.

It was likely a squatter, it had happened in the past. That had been his reasoning for creating this spell in the first place. He spent so much time away from here, that it must have looked like the perfect, abandoned, refuge. Severus understood why he was targeted, but that didn't mean he was lowering his wand. The incantations he'd placed on his home should have stopped this from happening again.

Everything looked intact, the glass of the window panes were whole, the door shut and locked. He had been here only two days previous. His home appeared exactly as he had left it, but something was off. He began to explore, his footsteps across the warped, wooden planks of the floor quiet from years of practice.

A thud met his ears from the other room and he stopped in his tracks, hand tightening on his wand before he advanced again. His pace was quicker this time, determined as he made his way to the source of the sound when it came again. This time it was the sound of a drawer being shut, of silverware knocking together.

Food? "Who's there?" Severus' voice came out as a low growl, emanating from the back of his throat with a ferocity he wasn't sure he felt.

Silence. He couldn't even hear that of feet, of an attempted escape.

"Sev?"

The consonants of his childhood nickname rang in his ears. The image of a rust colored, fair skinned woman flashed through his mind. The smile on her face morphing into the blank stare of death.

"Severus?" The voice came again, a voice that sounded like home, like the warmth from a crackling fireplace, crickets on a summer night. Like Lily.

He gave a series of rapid blinks, wiping away the memories that he wasn't entirely sure existed now. When his eyes cleared he found her standing in front of him, no longer the image of perfection he remembered.

Her hair was mussed, the red strands forever tangled together in a series of knots a brush could never conquer. Her cream-colored skin was speckled with black, patches of dirt smeared across and her equally disheveled clothes. A spoon – his spoon – was held upright to her lips. Peanut butter. And something about her eyes…It wasn't right.

He raised his wand arm again, having not realized that it dropped. "Who are you?"

Confusion crossed her features, she tipped her head to the side, examining him with foggy eyes. "Its Lily. You don't remember?" The confusion turned into a disappointment he didn't understand.

"Its not possible. You were…" He found himself unable to finish his sentence, his words dropping to a hush before fading completely. Few things were capable of leaving him speechless, but this? It couldn't possibly be true. The sensation of her lifeless body in his arms, already having gone cold, was one he could never forget.

On that day, he had seen her up close, had held her, an action he hadn't done in years. Her face had changed slightly as she matured, grew into herself, but he had known without a doubt that it was her. That day had been thirteen years ago, but it felt as if it had happened only minutes ago. The Lily that stood before him wasn't the Lily he knew, it wasn't Lily.

"Incarcerous." The words left his mouth before the thought had fully formed in his mind. Rope sprung from the tip of his wand, winding themselves around her. She struggled against it, panic rising in her eyes as her arms were pinned to her side, her body made immobile. The spoon that had been clenched in her hand clattered to the floor beneath her.

"Sev- Severus." The airy voice of before was choked by fear, made brittle and weak. "What are you doing? It's me. Its…its…Don't do this."

Anger, frustration, boiled in his veins. He had to tread carefully. With the Dark Lord looming, anyone could be standing in front of him. It was easy to conceal one's identity. "There are other ways to learn who you are. We can wait, we can cast charms, or best of all, you can tell me."

She flinched at his growl of a threat, giving only a shake of the head. Her lower lip trembled, preventing any words from escaping her mouth. His wand was aimed at her again, a different, planned, spell on his mind. "Revelio." This time a wind emanated from his wand, blowing over her in a rush. A wind that would remove almost any mask she hid behind. Her hair fell back into place, the gust of air dying away and leaving her in its place, exactly as she'd been before.

"Polyjuice then?" He cocked an eyebrow upwards. "Not the easiest potion to brew." A smirk formed on his lips, his chin tipped upwards in mock laughter. "But you're Lily, right? The great potioneer." He turned away from her, settling himself in a chair next to the fireplace. His fingers picked at the yellow threads that had come unstitched. "So, we'll wait. An hour should do it, assuming you took it just before my arrival." He waited for her to speak, to give an excuse, but she only stared, bound into a standing position. "I do have one question. How did you get in here? How did you get past the protection charms?"

"Si-sino Advorsa."

"That, there. What does it do?" Lily pointed to the two spells beneath the header 'protection'. Chewing the inside of her cheek before she looked up into his dark eyes. "It isn't like the last one, is it?"

"No." He shook his head, black curtain of hair swinging at the motion and hiding the irritation he felt at the accusation. "Keeps the Slytherins out of my trunk."

At his words, she looked at one of the other books on the library table. The binding had been torn and held together with spellotape. Equally tattered pages spilling out from beneath the cover. "It's a ward?"

"Of sorts."

He blinked again, annoyed by the recollections this…person was forcing to the forefront of his mind. Before he could respond, she spoke again, her voice filled with more confidence than it had been before.

"That's not the only thing I remember." Wrinkles appeared in her forehead, as if it took a great deal of pain to even remember what she remembered. "The mark. You took it, right? Winter break of seventh year."

"If you think that proves anything-"

"I- I know. Its public knowledge." She looked away from him as if deciding her next words. "But what about why you got it? How many people know that?"

The muscles of his cheeks jumped, and he adjusted his position in agitation. He didn't respond, allowing her to continue and she took the chance.

"Your dad, he was a-

"Fucker."

"Yes." She smiled ever so slightly at his outburst. "He made you hate muggles, made you-"

"I'm aware what he did." His words were forced through his clenched teeth. "A reminder isn't necessary."

"But it wasn't just him." Her eyes locked on his again, causing him to swallow. She was growing dangerously close to facts that only the true Lily would know. "Margaret."

"You stupid boy." The woman's jowls wobbled with the threat of her words. "You're just like your mother, a worthless twit. You'll amount to nothing." She removed the book out from in front of him, tearing the pages from it that it had been turned to and tossing the crumpled paper to the floor. "This is rubbish, a fantasy. "You'd do well to stick to your school books and nothing else."

"That was my Mums!" Severus shot back, angry with the white haired and frazzled looking woman. He stood so quickly that the wooden chair toppled to the ground. The palm of her hand was raised, striking him across the cheek.

He jerked, his fingers rising to touch the growing welt, the now red skin. His eyes fell to the pages on the floor, the diagram of a mandrake staring back at him. His face hurt, but it was nothing new. What stung more was how he would fix the pages of a book he cared so much about.

Lily had tended to that wound. He had been too embarrassed to go home, to afraid of what his father would do if he saw the damage Severus' grandma had inflicted. Not on her of course, Severus would have "deserved it" and Tobias probably would have thought Severus deserved more. His sickening views had had to come from somewhere.

"I'm right, aren't I?" Her voice broke the silence that had stretched out between them as he fell back into the present yet again.

"My reasoning is irrelevant." He leaned forward, placing his elbows on his knees. "Let's say you are Lily-

"-I am!"

He raised a hand in impatience. "Then how the absolute fuck do you explain the body – your body – I…I watched be buried?"

Her mouth cracked open before closing again. Severus watched her eyes grow shiny, tears brimming her eyelids for the first time that evening. She seemed to lose the small bit of composure she had maintained, her persona falling apart in front of him. He smirked to himself, pleased with how easily he had unraveled her lies. "That's what I thought."

His still held wand was lifted, and he gave it a jerk through the air. A chair was conjured behind her before he cast yet another spell. By moving only his arm, he forced her to sit. "In forty-five minutes, we'll both know the truth."