I Want to Believe
Our story begins in a very ethnic, very dangerous, hinging-on-the-poverty-line village in south Detroit. The air reeks of cheap hotdog stands and smog. A boy sits on the porch of the most beautiful home in the neighborhood; the only part of the projects that has been finished, thus far. His name...is Uchiha Sasuke.
A mother's voice..a familiar voice..the most familiar voice.."Sasuke! Get'cho ass of dat porch! Your macaroni is done! God damn it Sasuke, I'm gettin' the stick!". Sasuke struggles to speak, as his organs are thrown toward the Earth by the momentum generated when he stands up. You see, sometimes when a person is startled, they produce "adrenaline" and move much more harshly than usual. He stood up way too fast. Anyway..Sasuke screams,"Damn it Mom! I'm comin'! Jesus Christ!". He opens the door and his senses are assaulted by the nostalgic scent of Barton's vodka, cigarettes, mold, and macaroni-and-cheese made with tap water. He leaps over his uncle, asleep on the floor, into the kitchen. His mother lights a blunt and points at the table. A smile fills Sasuke's face from ear to ear, as he sits down to the table. Now realize, he is of course sitting on his head. He does intend to eat his macaroni-and-cheese through his anus and, when the time arrives, defecate the remaining excrement through his mouth. This is the way that any upstanding individual would eat.
Okay, what we haven't gotten to yet..is that, of course..his older brother Uchiha Itachi is out on an important mission, as per usual in a fanfic. Of course, this mission is much more important than any others. He was sent by his father to pick up a soft pack of Winstons and a 30-case of Nady Lite. This sounds simple enough, but in the hood..nothing is simple. We won't go into any detail, as far as his mission goes. He'll be back pretty soon..or maybe..he won't make it.
Uchiha Itachi returns from his mission. Totally unharmed. Actually, his skin is unnaturally shiny. Kind of glittery. He is greeted by his younger brother, right as he opens the door. "Oh Itachi", says Sasuke, "how I have longed for your presence. I perish the thought of eating my macaroni without you funneling it into my asshole with your tongue!". Itachi looks his brother square in the eyes and says, "Put dat ass in my face, nigga!". Sasuke foams at the mouth, as he points his ass as straightly toward the ceiling as he can without his mouth touching the mushrooms growing on the carpet. Itachi stares deeply into the gaping asshole, his 13-inch phallus gleaming, rock hard in anticipation. Of course, there are no veins on his penis. Nor any detailing on his ballsack. He begins funneling the macaroni-and-cheese into Sasuke's glimmering rectum. Sasuke groans in pleasure. His voice actor is temporarily replaced by a female voice actress. In raw passion Itachi jams his tongue into Sasuke's butthole.."Oh ho ho, you bad boy", says Itachi, "You didn't wipe today, did you? You lil' devil." Sasuke blushes as he looks away from his brother's eyes. He catches a glimpse of the Zarbon posters on his living room wall and immediately becomes erect. "Oh, Lord Frieza..I mean! No Itachi..I didn't wipe..I had...diarrhea today..I hope you don't mind.", says Sasuke. Itachi slams is waxed genitals into Sasuke's anal cavity. Moist macaroni is flung all around the room. A tangy scent of lemons fills the air.
Their mother screams at them from the kitchen "God damn it guys! Knock it off!". "Fuck you Mom!", yells Itachi. "Yeah! Suck my dick Mom!", Sasuke says. "Fuck you guys then!", says their mother, "I'm just gonna have to join in. Daddy bought me this new vibrator at the Adult Video store." Their father storms into the room, "Don't forget about me you faggots! Where are my beers?!", he pauses, "Jesus name...Just when I thought you boys couldn't get any gayer. I ain't watchin' this shit!". He leaves the room in a rage.
Itachi places his fingers onto Sasuke's buttcheeks and begins hammering it home. Sasuke spits out all of the mushrooms and carpet fibers that got into his mouth and screams as Itachi releases his seed into his intestines. Right at their moment of climax, Guy sensei, slams through the door. "Ohhhhh...Oh, oh, OHHHHHH! Look at this!". Guy sensei throws the two brothers to the ground on opposite sides of their mother and immediately vaporizes all of his clothing with the 'Fire of Youth'. He thrusts his already throbbing cock into their mother's vagina and grips each penis, tightly in his hand. Guy screams, "I'M OPENING THE EIGHT GATES!" Guy sensei begins opening each gate, one after the other, in a matter of seconds. His penis extends into the ceiling, puncturing the boys' mother through her spine. Blood sprays from Itachi's penis as the skin is ripped away. "I...I am coming!", says Itachi. Sasuke looks over to his brother and screams, "M..me too!". Blood sprays from Sasuke's penis and splashes Guy sensei in the face. He licks it up and spits it in Sasuke's face. They all die.
The boys' father walks back out into the living room and into the kitchen. He opens the refrigerator and pulls out two beers. "If I'd have known I'd be getting into this shit, I'd have never gone to rehab."
The End