Disclaimer: Don't own 'em

There was barely enough time for the guys to cover their ears as Jackie squealed at yet another Valentine's day commercial between 'Charlie's Angels' shows. She sat between Kelso and Fez on the couch hugging a pillow close to her chest. "Look at those roses!"

Hyde groaned, getting up to grab a drink from the cooler, and Kelso stuck his pinky in his left ear, checking to make sure he could still hear after that sudden outburst of Jackie's.

The girl sighed, "I love Valentine's Day. It's so romantic, don't you think?"

Hyde stopped before taking a swig of his Coke, "Nope."

Kelso nodded, "The only thing Valentine's Day is good for is that once you buy the chick some chocolates or whatever, you're guaranteed some afternoon delight. And we all know afternoon delight is the best kinda present anyone could get!"

Hyde and Fez considered, and nodded in agreement while Jackie slapped Kelso's shoulder. "You're so rude! Valentine's day is meant to be shared with someone you care about! Which means..." She smiled to each guy, "All of you will be getting me something special, right?"

"Wait, wait, wait!" Hyde raised his eyebrows. "When and where did I ever sign the papers for that scam!"

"Oh, Steven." Jackie waved the statement off. "This is just a chance for you men to show how much you really love me."

Hyde rolled his eyes and took a seat in his chair while Fez spoke up, "This is the chance that Fez has been waiting for! I can buy chocolate, eat half and still get afternoon delight!"

About to say something, Jackie's attention was turned away when Kelso grasped her wrist. "Jackie, I promise you I will make this the best Valentine's day ever for you."

Jackie smiled and laid her hand upon his. "Oh, Michael that is so sweet." She then looked passed him and onto Hyde. "Well Steven?"

Hyde took in a deep breath and rested his left foot on the round table in front of him. "Gee, I don't know Jackie. Valentine's Day is nothin' but a scam by the government to waste money on. And, well, honestly, I don't like you. So why waste money on the two things I hate most?"

Jackie glared at him"You know, some day you're gonna need something from me. And I'm not going to give it to you all because you refused to understand our love."

Hyde took another sip of his soda. "Yeah...wha' ev'r."