Seth walked into his house, dropping his bag onto the floor. This tour has been grueling for him; his knee has been acting up ever since he put too much pressure on it working out, management has been on his case making sure he doesn't skip out on their deal, the gold for his loyalty, then there was him. Dean. His former brother making his life a living hell. Attacking him in the middle of important matches, pranking him at every chance he gets. At this rate, Seth will be more paranoid of Dean doing something to him than conspiracy theorists are with the government. But now, he was home. Letting out a sigh of relief Seth walks over to his couch and plops down. Reaching over he grabbed the remote from the table and was almost able to turn on the tv before his cellphone started to ring. God, I can't even have any decent quiet time anymore. He thought reaching to pry his phone out of his back pocket. The ringer was something that sounded off in his sleep; someone always had to talk to him. Triple H calling in to give him a longer list of things that he has to do ranging from interviews to business meetings. Ortan calling in being his usual spy, always wondering what he was doing, reporting it back to Stephanie so that she can call and lecture him on what he is doing wrong with his life. This wasn't the way Seth thought things would turn out when he joined the Authority. They had sold him the idea that Dean and Roman were keeping him behind in the company. That all great factions fall apart because of envy and greed and that if it was going to happen anyway, then why not be at the forefront of it, leading the destruction, instead of being in the wake and having someone else take his chance? They never sold him the idea that they were a big happy family, all looking out for each other, having each other's back. If he wanted that he could have stayed with the Shield, they sold him power, money, prosperity. That one got him. He has worked his ass off to get to where he is, and hell would have to freeze over if he was ever going to let himself fall back to were he started. The phone kept ringing, so Seth answered it, expecting to hear H's gruff voice or Stephanie's nasal whine. "Hello?" Seth asked into the phone. Nothing came back. He tried again, still nothing. Seth pulled the phone away from his ear to look at the caller ID. Panic flashed through him. The number didn't have a name with it anymore, but he would always recognize it. Why the hell is Dean calling me? Seth thought. Pulling the phone back up to his ear he went to his usual annoyed Seth voice that he uses when he has to talk to Dean, "What the hell do you want Ambrose, why on God's green earth are you calling me?" Still no response. There was shuffling around though as if the phone was in a pocket. Damn idiot butt-dialed me. Seth thought. He was about to hang up when he heard voices.

If you only knew
I'm hanging by a thread
The web I spin for you

Seth paused and pulled the phone back up to his ear. Was that Ambrose singing? He honestly couldn't believe his ears, but the sound continued.

If you only knew
I'd sacrifice my beating
Heart before I lose you
I still hold onto the letters
You returned
I swear I've lived and learned

Seth's heart stopped when he figured out what song was playing. His mind went back to days that pained him to think about. Days when he felt loved and needed. Days that seemed to spell out the future for him.

It's 4:03 and I can't sleep
Without you next to me I
Toss and turn like the sea
If I drown tonight, bring me
Back to life
Breathe your breath in me
The only thing that I still believe
In is you, if you only knew

Memories came flooding back into his mind. Nights out late with Dean, going out for drinks after an indy match, shit-talking after the alcohol had taken effect. Telling Dean things he'd never told anyone before. Dean sharing some of his past with him that he normally doesn't talk about. Then the night that they walked back to their motel, Dean stopping him before they got close to the motel lights and kissed him. Darkness surrounding them both as they held each other in a forbidden embrace, savoring the taste of one another. Seth swore come the next morning Dean wouldn't wanna talk to him again. He was sure Dean just had too much to drink and wouldn't want a reminder that they played tonsil hockey. So when Dean came knocking on his door with his big goofy shit-eating grin plastered on his face, with wild flowers in his extended hand, he almost couldn't believe his luck. That night led to many nights of them alone in one or the other motel room. They would just talk, maybe have a drink, maybe not, and just enjoy being with each other. They would play music and dance, or just lay in the bed, tangled together just listening to each other's heartbeat. The night that this song played, Seth and sung it to Dean while they lay in bed together, Seth put so much emotion in his voice that when the song had ended, Dean had tears rolling down his cheeks. That was the night Seth told Dean he loved him. That was the night that they went from brothers to lovers, willingly giving over their hearts to each other, entrusting their very souls to one another, believing wholeheartedly that neither one would let the other down. And neither had. Until Seth hit Dean with that chair.

If you only knew
How many times I counted
All the words that went wrong
If you only knew
How I refuse to let you go,
Even when you're gone
I don't regret any days I
Spent, nights we shared,
Or letters that I sent

After that night Dean tried to call Seth so many times that his phone died before he was able to get back to his hotel room. He had left so many voicemails that his inbox was full. Dean wanted to know what happened, why did Seth do it, did he do something wrong that pissed Seth off? If he did, he was sure that they could work it out, that Dean would try to do better by Seth; all he had to do was answer the phone. Talk to him. Be open with him. What Dean didn't know was that it had nothing to do with him. Seth had agreed to be The Authority's show pony out of greed but that he never wanted to end the Shield as he did. He wanted to tell Dean what was gonna happen, to have Dean miss that match and fake their hatred on camera. But The Authority couldn't let that happen. Ortan had found out about Dean and Seth's romantic relationship and threatened to release proof to the public, shattering what Seth and Dean had worked so hard for unless he broke things off with Dean. But a simple text wouldn't have been enough, the Authority wanted it to be public and recorded, so it had to be done that way. Seth was so disgusted with himself in the aftermath of that night that he just adopted the persona that Triple H had fed him, the arrogant, cocky bastard that only looked out for himself. He never called Dean back. He put so much venom in the words that he spoke to him on screen that he hoped that Dean would believe then and would be so hurt that he would hate him. Seth had hoped that if Dean hated him, then it would make moving on much easier for Dean. For Seth though, Dean would be the only one. From the way that Dean sounded over the phone, he might hate Seth, but he hasn't moved on.

It's 4:03 and I can't sleep
Without you next to me I
Toss and turn like the sea
If I drown tonight, bring me

Back to life
Breathe your breath in me
The only thing that I still believe
In is you, if you only knew

If you only knew

Dean kept singing that song, and Seth kept listening. Tears flowing down his face now, his head in his hand, elbows perched on his knees. God, I miss him. Seth thought as Dean finished out the song. Seth couldn't bring himself to hang up the phone just yet. Yes, it was creepy just sitting there listening to Dean while Dean had no idea that he had accidentally called him. This was the closest he had been to Dean since that night, and he just couldn't bring himself to lose the connection just yet. There was a soft knock on the other end of the phone; someone was knocking on Dean's door. More shuffling came as Dean go up to answer the door. "Hey brother, you ready to go? We gotta head out soon to make the plane." Seth heard Roman's voice over the shuffling that must have been Dean grabbing his things. "Yeah, I'm ready." Dean responded. There was a short silence then Roman piped up, "You still listening to that song?" Seth dropped his hand from his head and focused on every sound that was coming out of the phone. "S'the only thing I got left from him. His promise that night and that song." There was silence from then on. Seth waited to hear something, anything else, while his mind reeled at that confession. Dean still listened to that song, not only does he listen to it but he does so frequently if Roman knows about it. Seth knew he needed to hang up, but before he did he spoke one last time, "I still love you, Dean." With that he hung up the phone and made a promise to himself, he would fix what he had broken, come hell or The Authority.