I don't own the BMFM and use them for entertainment purposes only as with the song which I do not own either.
A Little Girl TalkBy Morning
2003
"Okay what's the matter, Charlene?" Carbine made herself comfortable propping her feet up on the desk knowing this conversation was long over due as she took on an older sister, here's my shoulder, comforting, manner.
"What makes you think there's anything wrong?" Charley sat quietly fiddling with the fringes of the white chenille spread that covered her bed. The wireless headset she'd cooked up let her have many conversations with her now best friend in the privacy of her bedroom, free from the over size ears of any lurking Martian men folk.
"Let's see, by Earth time it's about 3 am and you're still up. I don't hear the sound of any walls breaking or motors running so that means you've gotten rid of the guys. Let's just say I'm real good at reading the sound of the unhappy voice of someone I care a lot about. So come on, spill."
Charley and Carbine had become very close, maybe it was that both young woman hadn't much family left and each knew what real loneliness felt like. It didn't matter that they were literally worlds apart; the human heart can be wrapped in a varied array of diverse and beautiful coverings so fellow feeling can expand the universe.
"Well, first I have to tell you something and I'm not sure how you'll feel about me after." Charley could feel a nervous guilty twinge in the bottom of her stomach.
"If its, that you've fallen for Throttle, I think you're a little late. I've known for a while now." Carbine chuckled hoping to put Charley a little more at ease.
"I know it goes against the single woman's creed, never get involved with a friend's x and I really tried not to let my feelings get out of control, but one minute he was my friend and the next, the guy walks in the room and my heart does flips."
"Don't let it stress you, Cee-girl. I can't think of anyone that would be better for him then you.
When I came to Earth, to get the pink seed planet, that little conversation Throttle didn't think I could hear gave me a clue. Then the way you'd try not to look at him gave me another. That last hug Throttle and I shared suddenly felt different and when I got back to Mars I had a long hard honest talk with myself. I knew then that it would never be the same between us and I had to find enough courage to tell Throttle. Once I muster that up, we did talk and he had to admit his feeling had changed too. It was hard ending it, but in the long run it was the best for both of us." Carbine unconsciously touched the matching tattoo on her left arm that was always covered by her sleeve.
"Thanks for sharing, I was feeling so guilty, but all that guilt might have been for nothing since I don't think that Throttle is interested in me in that way." Charley slumped down on the bed.
"Oh he's interested, he's a lot more than just interested. He talked to me about his feeling for you."
"He was comfortable enough to do that and you didn't mind?" Charley was a little surprised, when she and Jack broke up it took them some years to become real friends again.
"Charley, this was someone I had spent most of my life loving. From the time I first saw him standing in the corner, scared of his own shadow in first grade, until now. We'll always have a certain kind of love and closeness. I'm always going to be there for him and I hope he'll be there for me. Stoker understood that before we got married and is comfortable with it. Does it bother you?" Carbine's voice took on a very serious, but sincere tone.
Charley was quiet for a second and rolled over on her back while her head dangled of the edge of the bed letting Carbine's question settle in her heart then smiled, "No. Lovers can come and go, but real friends are hopefully there for a life time."
"Thanks Cee, because. I'm going to let you in on a little secret about our Throttle, for all his macho posturing and bad biker attitude, he has been scared most of his life. Oh, he'll face the most dangerous, impossible, life-threatening situations and deal with them as easily as someone else would walk across the street. But letting that Plutarkian, glass-steal, wall down and possible allowing his heart to be vulnerable terrifies him. If we hadn't grown up together I don't think we'd have stayed together as long as we did."
"Really, maybe that would explain what happened last night?"
"Last night?"
"Yeah, it was one of those rare almost nonexistent times we were alone. I was working on my bike and it was almost like one of those old movies. I drop the wrench and we went to pick it up at the same time. His hand touched mine and we looked into each other's eyes and standing almost close enough to touch. He reached up and took off his shades and just as we almost connected he stopped, looked at me in such a strange sad way, brushed my cheek, put the glasses back on, made some lame excuse and was gone in 60 seconds."
"That's his MO, he's running, scared of hurting," Carbine said sorrowfully.
"Hurting?" Throttle would never do anything to hurt me or anyone."
"Oh, not of hurting you, of being hurt by you. It's not you personally, Charley. Throttle's model for how you're treated when you give your heart to someone, sadly was his parents or his mother I should say."
"Not good, huh?"
"That's putting it mildly. His dad, Ricochet adored Stellar, his mom, but because of her own set of issues she couldn't ever return it. Throttle grew up seeing her hurt his dad in some very nasty ways. He was about 8 or 9 the night his father was killed while out on a scout mission. Stellar didn't say anything to him, just packed her stuff one night and left him in the cold dark house alone. He finally found his way over to my house and my parents let him stay the night until Stoker came and got him in the morning. We sat on my back porch all night and he laid his head on my lap and cried. That's the first time he told me he loved me. Funny, I haven't thought about that night for years." Carbine wiped a small tear from her eye.
"Charley I hope you have honestly thought about what being with Throttle will be like. That you care enough to deal with all the stuff that's ahead of you, before you get into it."
At first Charley was immediately going to say yes. But the serious sound of Carbine's words made her stop and think before speaking, "I know we are going to have more to deal with then most people. I'm not blind to the fact that we are two different beings from two different worlds, not to mention all the things we've both been through, but I can't see my life without him. I love him Carbine and real love is never blind."
"Glad to hear that, because fear or not he's already past the point of no return. I wish you could have heard him stammering around hoping I would tell him why he shouldn't love you. But I wasn't about to let him off the hook. For every reason he came up with why you'd never work, I countered with how letting you go would be the worst mistake he'd ever make. I guess I didn't get through as much as I had hoped."
"You did everything right, Carbine. I guess now the balls in my court."
"Oh, you have a plan"?
"Yes, the best wall buster around, the truth. Thanks for all the info Carbine you're a jewel and I'm glad that he, no I'm glad that we have you around."
"No problem Cee-girl. You both are pretty special to me; I've always been big on family. Hey, call me and let me know how it goes."
"Of course, I'll call you around this time tomorrow, bye."
"Tomorrow then, bye."
Later that evening:
Charley was up in her bedroom giving herself a final once over, nothing too overwhelming, but a change of pace from her normal blue shirt, jeans and brown boots. A simple white poet shirt, matching white cotton pant and sandals served the purpose quite nicely. She had told Vinnie and Modo to find somewhere else to be and was waiting for Throttle to arrive. She told him that she had to talk to him privately and he agreed.
The sound of his bike coming down the street made her heart pound. "Please, please let me do this right," she whispered prayerfully.
Throttle pulled his bike in and park. He felt uneasy knowing what ever Charley had to talk about was going to be personal and he wasn't sure if he was ready for personal. Why did he let his guard down the other night, she would have never suspected if he didn't try to kiss her. Nah, she already had an idea. Maybe it was the times she caught him staring at her or the way he'd get clumsy trying to make sure not to get too close. One part of him wanted to take her in his arms and pledge his eternal love, but that frighten little boy who woke up in the dark bedroom alone, was pulling him back into a life of lonely isolation.
"Throttle," Charley's voice jerked him from his emotional dilemma. He looked up to see her standing half way down the stairs that lead to her upper living area. What word would be more than beautiful, she took his breath away. Her simple white attire and fully combed out hair falling longer then her shoulders, almost made him fall off his bike.
"You want to come up? I thought we might be a little more comfortable up here."
"Yeah, sure why not?" He stammered. He wasn't this nervous the first time he had to lead his first raid into enemy territory. But then all he had to face was being out numbered 10 to 1.
They made themselves comfortable and Charley was the first to speak, "I didn't think this was going to be so hard, but I have to tell you what I feel. We've known each other for a long time and in that time I have never had a truer or more caring friend. You, Vinnie, and Modo have been like family to me and I adore you all.""We care a lot about you too, Charley girl," he said smiling.
"I know, but I have to tell you something very important and I don't know how to put it or how you'll accept it."
"Hey Charley, we never had trouble being honest, so what ever it is just say it and we'll deal with it," he took her hand reassuringly.
"I love you, Throttle. Not only as a dear friend but as someone I want to share my life with."
Throttle was silent for a second, he loved her too and as much as he yearned to hear those words come from her mouth, the times he imagined how magnificent it would feel to know she loved him, he shook his head in a sad negative way, "You want more than me, Charlene and one day you'll realize that. I thought for a second that I could, but as selfish as this might sound, I can't risk it. I've seen what can happen when love stops I know the pain it causes. I got so little heart left and it couldn't take that kind of pain. You'll find a great Earther that will really make you happy, save the love in those beautiful eyes for him," he released her hand and started to get up to leave.
No, I won't let you do this," she pushed him back in his seat and being caught off guard he plopped back down shocked and stared at her. "You are not running away from me. Okay you probably have had more than your share of heartache and I understand that you might be scared, so we'll take it as slow as you want. Please, Throttle, just give me a chance, please."
Throttle took off his shades and looked into her pleading eyes then took her face and sweetly kissed her lips. His touch was as gentle as a baby's whisper. He moved away and stood to leave, but getting to the top of the stairs he looked over at the confused hurt look on Charley's face, "It's too hard, Charley girl, I just can't…"
Charley reached out for him but he was gone before she could say anything.
Vinnie pulled into the garage soon after Throttle had left expecting to interrupt the huggin' and kissin' hour and do some serious ragging on both Throttle and Charley. But once pulling up into the garage he was first of all surprised that the door was left wide open, then not to see Throttle's bike and to hear somebody crying. What the heck was going on? It wasn't supposed to work out like this. He and Modo knew what Charley had planned and they knew that Throttle was crazy in love with her; it couldn't have been easier if it had been the plot of one of those sappy romance movies Charley was always mooning over. He quietly slipped up the stairs and peeked over to see Charley with her head down on the couch crying her eyes out. She was so upset she didn't even hear his bike pull up. He started to walk over and comfort her but thought a minute and slipped back down the stair and walked is bike outside. Going back inside he turned off the lights and pulled the garage door down securing it.
"What did that idiot do to her," he fumed getting on his bike and heading straight back to the scoreboard.
Throttle pulled up into the hide and parked his bike. Modo started to ask how things went but the look on Throttle's face told him to let it go at least until morning. Now sooner did Throttle settle in his bunk when Vinnie came barreling up and slamming on his brakes. Modo looked at him and stepped back as Vinnie stormed over toward Throttle.
The livid white Martian stood over the person he normally had nothing but respect for and growled at him, "How stupid are you?"
Throttle, whose arm was covering his glasses-free eyes, sighed," I'm not in the mood for any of your nonsense, Vincent, so back off."
"You' re not in the mood, like I almost care about you and your sorry moods. You really hurt Charley girl. I just left her at the garage ballin' " somethin' awful and I know it was somethin you said or did." Vinnie fumed.
"It's none your business, so like I said, back off." Throttle removed his arm and turned to glare at his bros a look that would have, under normal circumstance, made Vinnie immediately change the subject but not this time.
"What's the matter, fearless leader, did you bail on her once she told you she really cared for you. When you gonna stop playin' the martyr. You think Charley is as heartless as your old lady, you think she'll dog you around like your old man was dogged. That's ancient history and you need to get over it. Charley is a one in a million catch and if you 're too stupid to realize that then maybe you did her a favor."
Throttle raised up seething, "You've said enough, Van Wham, one more word and I'll….
"You'll what? It don't take no backbone to deal with me. Sure you can probably try and whip my tail, so what. Takin' a real chance, letting a sweet number like Charley love ya, that would take the kind of courage that you ain't gotta." Vinnie, by this time, had step close enough to ram his finger in Throttle's chest while growling in his face.
In one motion Throttle pushed Vinnie's hand away and stood breathing hard and seeing red. The fury in his voice so intense it shook the rafters, "What do you know about anything. Everything is just a big joke to you, the war, Mars, Earth, even Charley. She would've just been another toy for you to play with and dump when you got through."
Modo could have run a block to stop them, but this was something they had to work out. He just watched and listen and was there to make sure they didn't kill each other if thing did get out of hand.
"You'd like to think that, wouldn't ya? Just because I don't parade all my pain around like some sad medal doesn't mean I don't have my share. You' re not the only one who had it hard as a kid. Modo's old man use to use him for target practice, but he didn't let it run his life. Yeah, my folks were great and I'm not about to apologize for that, but when I saw how the fishheads killed them, how long it took and how they screamed, it screwed me up pretty bad, but I didn't run away from life. And for your information, bright boy, Charley was different. She just never felt like that about me and I was hoping you'd be man enough to see that she was what you needed. I guess I made the mistake in thinking you're a, man." With the last word Vinnie pushed Throttle in the chest harder causing the already unsteady tan Martian to stumble back.
Throttle landed back down on his bunk and the reasonable, cool-headed always in control leader disappeared. Anger took away any reason, anger that was fueled by the truth Vinnie slapped him in the face with. A truth that dredged up all the hurt he could no longer hide from and he was going to hurt back. Throttle launched himself off the bunk and connected with Vinnie propelling them both to the other side of the scoreboard smashing into the wall causing an enormous whole in the concrete. They tumbled to the floor and wrestled around knocking over or smashing up anything that was unfortunately in their way.
Modo sighed and took a breath before diving into the mêlée in an attempt to separate his battling bros. The out of control ruckus stopped when miraculously Carbine's panicked voice was heard coming from the scoreboards long ranger transmitter, "come in, please come in, it's about Stoker. Somebody answer me, please, come in, he's been hurt."
The three frozen and Modo was the first to untangle himself and get to the radio," What's up Carbine, what happened?"
"He was coming back from a mission and his truck hit one of the old mines. We thought we'd found them all. He's hurt pretty bad and they don't think he'll make it." Carbine's voice was shaking and the fear was plainly heard.
"How long to get a ship down here to pick us up." Throttle stood next to Modo and Vinnie soon joined them.
"The Delverrian Counsel has been supplying ships since they've joined us in battling Plutark. One can get there and you back here in 48 hours, but that still might not be enough time. Like I said he's pretty bad," her voice broke into a weak tremble.
"We'll tell Charley and be ready at the landing area at 2300 hours Earth time. Hang in there, Carbine he's not gone yet and that's a tough old bird you got there."
"Thanks guys. Someone will be waiting to get you to the infirmary as soon as you land. Carbine out."
The three stood silently for a few seconds and then Throttle turned to Vinnie and put an apologizing hand on his shoulder. " Sorry bro, I guess I don't handle the truth as well as I should. You were right and I…"
"No sweat, Fearless Leader. Just think about what I said. Are you going to tell Charley or you want me to do it." Vinnie smiled.
"No, I'll tell her. You guys better secure things around here before we go. I'll head over to her place."
Throttle got on his bike and left. After what had taken place between he and Charley facing her wasn't going to be easy, but he would have had to sooner or later. He pulled up into the garage and parked. Charley was in the garage packing things away. He didn't get off the bike, just sat watching her trying to muster up enough courage to say something, but she beat him to it.
"Carbine called and I'm going to Mars when the ship lands and don't give me any it's too dangerous speeches, because I'm going no matter what you say." She never looked at him and continued putting things away.
"Okay Charley girl. If that's what you want. I just …well I just wanted…"
She stopped and turned to face at him, "Look Throttle, I told you how I felt and I'm not ashamed of a word of it. You can't handle it well, that's your problem, but I will go on with my life. Carbine needs us and she and Stoker are what we have to concentrate on now, understand?"
"Yeah I understand. You need any help packin' up,"
"No thanks I'm fine. You better go and get ready yourself. You know Curly and Larry can't do anything with out you to keep them in line. She smiled hoping he would make the connection and it would ease the tension.
Throttle thought for a second then smiled and shook his head remembering that the names referred to the three Earth comics that he and his bros enjoyed so much. "You want us to come here for you or you wanna met us at the board?"
"Carbine said I could bring my bike so I'll meet you at the touchdown coordinates. Just make sure you clowns aren't late."
"Yes sir, ma'am," he playfully saluted and left with a big smile.
*****
The ship landed; pick up its passengers and rocket back to Mars at light speed arriving in record time. The escort was waiting at the landing area and they were taken immediately to the infirmary. Walking up the corridor they could see a number of freedom fighters lining the hall way all looking very grim. A tall heavily built young man with jet-black hair and gray fur walked up to greet them.
"Been a while guys," he smiled sadly and grabbed Throttle's hand.
"Too long bro, how's life been treatin' ya, Cole?"
Not too bad. We've just about got this thing finished since the Delverrians have been helpin' out. Seems like the stink fish have ticked off half the galaxy and they stripped mined one planet too many. So once they found out what happened here they been fightin with us. But we can catch up on all that later. The general is taken it really bad and it's good you guys were able to make back it to be with her."
"He's not…?" Charley held her hand to her heart frighten that they had been to late.
Cole gave her a sympathetic smile, "No ma'am. But he's really weak. He was in surgery for 12 hours and then put in a germ free stasis chamber.
"Sorry, Cole, this is our friend, Charlene Davidson. She's the angel that has been takin' care of us while we've been on Earth. Charley, this is Cole, a bro that goes back a long way with us." Throttle introduced her.
"I've heard a lot about you, Miss Charley and it's an honor to meet such a fine and courageous and beautiful young woman." Cole took Charley's hand and kissed it very gallantly and she nodded blushing slightly.
I'll take you to where they have him and the General can fill you in on everything else." Cole took them down a few corridors to a glass enclosed room where they found Carbine standing in front of the huge window.
Carbine couldn't stop looking at the varied lights that quickly flashed on and off as she felt the coolness of the glass her forehead leaned against. Each one was a signal that Stoker was still alive and it meant that the chamber was buying him more time. The Martian physiology was amazing in its ability to quickly repair injuries, but with Stoker's age and the extensive damage even with all the doctors had done no one could say whether he would live.
"Come on Stoke, we've still got so much living to do. I love you and I need you so badly." Carbine gentle touched the glass praying that he could feel her thoughts.
"Carbine?" Throttle's voice immediately got her attention and she looked up and smiled.
"Hi Guys, you got here sooner than I thought. I'm glad you came too, Charley I really appreciate it." They could see the tiredness in her eyes and the fear.
Charley knew Carbines reputation for being the unshakable, can handle any situation, I'm as macho as any of you bad bikers, General that kept Plutark from taking over Mars completely. But now she was just a frighten woman who needed the support only another woman could give. She reached out and took Carbine's hand and squeezed it softly, "You know I wouldn't stay away. Hey, we girls gotta stick together."
Carbine looked into the sincere green eyes of her terrain friend and pulled Charley into a desperate hug and whispered, "He might die, Charley! What will I do if I lose him?"
Charley held her tightly letting her lean on someone else for a change, "We just won't let that happen, that's all."
Carbine looked up at Charley and smiled releasing her hold and stepping back," No I guess we can't. Look at me some General, crying like a schoolgirl. If Stoker ever found out I'd be teased forever," Carbine managed to chuckle a little.
"Your secret is safe with us. How is he?" Throttle turned stepping closer to look into the specially designed area that kept Stoker alive.
"Well, he beat the odds by surviving the surgery. Now all we can do is wait and see if he can pull one of those Stoker miracle moves and live until morning. In there they have slowed all his body functions way down. That's so he can use every ounce of energy to help heal him. If he makes it through the night, they say he has a pretty good chance.' Carbine joined him taking hold of his arm and Throttle laid his hand on top of hers.
Vinnie and Modo joined them and no one spoke, just looked and reflected on what the older Martian had meant to their lives. To Vinnie he was the strength that helped him get over the death of his own father and even though you'd never know it by how they reacted toward each other, they had a deep and caring relationship. For Modo he was a place of refuge when things got really bad at home before his mother had taken one beating to many and fled with her children. He gave them a safe place to stay and was protector and support until his mom cold handle things on her own. For Throttle he was the guiding force that taught him everything he knew about loyalty, courage and taking care of those who couldn't take care of themselves. A son's love for his own father couldn't have been stronger then what he felt for Stoker. Charley stood back and watched them all wishing there was more she could do, but there wasn't anything to do, but wait, hope, and pray.
Cole who had silently waited finally spoke up; "If you all want to freshen up a little we got some quarters ready for you."
"You all have had a long ride, why don't you go get some rest. There isn't anything you can do here you might as well take time to regroup." Carbine encouraged.
"Well, I am a little tired." Charley admitted.
"You guys go ahead. I'll stay and hang around here for a while. You go too Carbine, you look like you are just about ready to pass out and that's an order, General." Throttle held Carbine by the shoulders. She looked into his face seeing that he wasn't going to take any excuses.
"Okay but don't let this get good to you. I'm only going because Charley and I are sharing my quarters and we need time to talk about you behind your back." Carbine meant it as a joke but the feeling that filled the air said he wasn't looking forward to be the subject of their conversation.
She ignored his reaction and linked her arm into Charley's, "Come on Cee, I'll show you where you'll be bunking. Cole, you show Vinnie and Modo where to go."
"Yes sir," Cole saluted. "Come on bros. It's just down here.
Charley was surprised when Carbine opened the door to she and Stoker's home. It was warm, cozy with bright colors spread around to give it a very homey feeling. Even though all the furniture was made from a drab colored metal, the couple had filled the area with beautiful paintings and just the right amount of knick-knacks to give their home its own very unique and personal feel.
"You can put your stuff in this room," Carbine walked down the small hallway and opened the door to the spare bedroom. Charley looked around the room and smiled while putting her bag down and taking a seat on the bed. Carbine joined her, "Okay what happened?"
"Carbine you have enough to worry about without me adding the trials and tribulations of my love life. Or lack of a love life I should say."
"Didn't you just tell me that we girls have to stick together? So let's have it maybe it will take my mind off of Stoker for a while." Carbine lay back on the pillows.
"Well, I told him I loved him and he walked away and all I could do was sit there and cry my eyes out. I guess my wall buster isn't as powerful as I thought."
"Oh Cee, I'm sorry. That big, sweet, adorable jerk, how I wish Stoker could talk to him and tell him what a fool he's being." Carbine fussed completely frustrated.
It's okay, at least he knows how I feel now it's on him and I been known to wait a long timed for what I want when I think it's worth it. And yeah I think he's worth it."
"Good for you Cee girl. And I think there's a lady that will help him over the hurdle."
"You mean they found his mother?" Charley's eyes widened in hope.
"No, sorry to say she didn't make it, but I think what this lady will tell him is going to do just as much good, maybe more. She was one of the prisoners Stoker's group had gone to return from the prisoner exchange with the fish heads."
*****
Throttle took a seat near the wall and let his head rest for a second. He knew that there was nothing he could really do but being close to Stoker made him fell better.
"Excuse me," a soft voice made him look to see an older woman standing directly in front of him.
"Your name is Throttle?" The older woman asked quietly. Her soft gentle ruby eyes caught his attention right away.
"Yes ma'am, may I help you," he asked curiously.
"No, but maybe I can help you. Even though it's been so long your still just as she described except for the glasses. She said your fur was the color of a field of desert blooming dust flowers and that hair is still tossed just as she remembered," she sat next to him and brushed her hand through his bangs.
Throttle didn't stop her and was held motionless wondering whom she was referring too, "excuse me?
"Stellar, your mother. She described you so well."
He looked at her and stood walking away. "I have no mother, she walked out on me a long time ago and took her memory with her. The only parents I have were my dead father and that man laying in there trying to stay alive."
"She told me what she did and if it helps she regretted it until the day… well until the day she died."
He spun around and looked at the woman, "So what I'm I supposed to do now, grieve. She didn't grieve for my father and she left me alone to deal with all that pain. Sorry lady, it's too late for me to feel anything for her. I'm sorry she didn't make it, but that's all I feel."
"I understand why you may feel like you do, but I made a promised to give this to you and I'm keeping that promise. You do what you want, but this is from her." With that she slipped a small metal book like object into his hand.
"I just want you to know that your mother paid for leaving you in ways that you'll never imagine, but because of her dedication and bravery, many a Martian child is sleeping safe tonight." She touched his shoulder and walked away.
Throttle looked down at what she'd handed him and debated what to do with it. His first reaction was to throw it as far away from him as he could, but something inside wanted to know what she could possible have said to him. He had to clear his head everything was spinning around and his heart was all but ready to explode inside. His fist slammed down on the chair and he stormed out of the room to get his bike and hit the desert.
Storming down the hall almost knocked Carbine over, "Whoa Speedy, where you running off to."
"You feel like some air, I need to cool my jets. Please I need you to be with me. I promise I won't go far and I'll get you back quick if Stoke needs ya." His eyes were all but pleading.
Well okay, if you promise not too far. You sure you don't want Charley to go with you."
"Yeah I'm sure, come on," He grabbed her hand and practically pulled her to the garage. They got on his bike and flew out into the cool Martian evening breeze. After a brief burst of speed they ended up about a mile from the base. He parked, walked over and knelt down to picked up a hand of red sand letting it slowly pour form his fingers.
Carbine walked over and put a hand on his shoulder," you've talked to Stellar's friend didn't you?"
"Yeah she talked to me and gave me this," he reached into his pocket and showed her the little metal
book.
What is it?' She took it from his hand and turned it around.
"Don't know, some kind of diary or letter or something,"
"Well?"
"Well, what? Why should I care what she had to say? When I needed her, she didn't want to hear my tears, why should I care what she has to say now?"
"Because maybe with her last words you can find some kind of peace. You can find a way to trust your heart. Charley loves you so much and you need to close the past and find a future with a woman like that. She's willing to wait, but don't trust that it will be forever. You've got a chance for a something really good; maybe your mother can help you down that path. Give her a chance to make things right." She held out her hand to give the object back to him.
In a second he pulled her close to him and kissed her, not from passion or romance but more out of an act of desperation. Shocked he looked at her and turned away ashamed and embarrassed, "I don't know why I did that, I'm sorry Carbine I..I.."
"Running to the past isn't going to help, Handsome. My arms aren't the ones you need those are waiting for you in my quarters. Don't be alone when you read that let Charley give you the strength to open that little book and read it with her."
He smiled at the wisdom in her young eyes and knew why Stoker found her to be his life mate, despite the different in their ages, "Stoke is a fortunate guy and I know he'll pull through, let's get back and thanks for everything, Sis."
"Just part of the job, keeping all my freedom fighters on the right track. Besides, now I have such a nice piece of blackmail. You mess up with Charley and I'll tell Stoker you were out in the dessert kissing his wife." Carbine smirked at him.
"I guess I better not mess up. I've had Stoker wailing on my tail too many times in the past. I don't want to go through that again." Throttle smiled giving her a grateful hug that she hardly returned. They boarded his bike and head back to the base.
Once back in side, Carbine gave Throttle an encouraging nudge on the arm aiming him in the direction of her quarters and she went to stay close to Stoker, since rest was just not going to be something she'd do until he was out of danger.
Throttle walked up to the door and stood not able to bring his hand up to knock. He turned to leave then thought about what Carbine had said and face the door again. Before his hand could complete the knock Charley opened the door and stepped back a little startled seeing him standing there.
"Hey Charley girl, um…you goin' somewhere?" He nervously questioned.
"Yeah, I really can't sleep so I was going to explore the base a little. Did you want Carbine for something, because she isn't here?"
"I know I just left her she was going to see about Stoker. I was wondering if I could talk to ya for a few. We could walk to the, Garden Of Hope, they say it's really something to see since the last time we were here?" He fiddled with the scarf that hung from his wrist hoping she wouldn't say no.
Charley smiled at the struggling little boy look that covered his face. How could she say anything but yes, "Okay, I'd like that."
They walked the short distance from inside the base to the garden in relative silence, he with his hands grasped around his back and she with her clinched in front of her. It was as if they'd just met and couldn't find exactly the right words to say.
Opening the large metal that lead to the garden it was like opening the door to an enchanted wonderland. The Martian citizens had worked hard to, not only expand, but also add as many different types of blooming flowers and lush trees that they could get back from the Plutarkians and other places in the universe.
"Oh Throttle, I can only imagine how incredibly beautiful Mars must have been. I hope your people can some day make the whole planet what it once was." Charley stood struggling between the joy of such indescribable beauty and horrible loss.
"Yeah, it was. We can only hope that everyone will do what ever it takes to make it right, that we'll learned from the mistakes we made in the past." His voice was more serious than Charley had ever heard and she dared to take his hand, putting the other one his shoulder.
"Charlene, would you do me a favor?"
"If I can."
"Would you stay with me for a while. I have to do something really hard and I don't want to be alone."
Of all the things she had ever seen in his face Charley would never forget the pleading lost look that was stamp into his features at this moment.
"Of course I will. If nothing else we'll always be friends, Throttle and friends are there for each other." She squeezed his arm a little tighter.
He smiled and walked her over to an almost hidden cove surround by vines that had small purple flowers hanging from them. They sat on a bench that had been carved out of red stone. Throttle pulled out the book like object and opened it not really knowing what to expect, Charley sat silently and watched.
A small glow emitted from the center of the device an a haze of blue smoke swirled until the image of a Martian woman fazed from a blurry out of focus image into a clear hologram of Throttle's mother.
Her face was worn and you could tell that the years had not been kind to her but she still had a deeper type of beauty that was mirrored in the face of her son.
The image spoke, " My dearest son, when you see this, more than likely my life will have come to an end. There is so much I want to tell you. Nothing can make up for my leaving you other than to tell you it was the hardest thing I ever had to do. The night I left I went right to Stoker and he promised that he would take good care of you. I was no good for you and I knew that I would only cause you pain the same pain I caused your father.
My life has been hard but I hope the things I've done will some how make up for leaving you. I found some solace in trying to help other children, but when ever I saw a beautiful little sandy hair little boy I remember the son who I never stopped loving but I knew had a better life without me.
I'm sure you've grown into a fine young man and I pray that your life will be filled with the love that my life wasn't. I also pray that somehow you can find it in your heart to forgive me.
Throttle stared at the electronic replica of the woman he'd spent years hating. He wanted to keep that feeling, but the sadness in her eyes and the remorse in her voice tumbled the wall he'd built around his heart. He may never totally understand her reasons for the decisions she'd made, but at least he knew she had always loved him and that would be enough.
Are you okay, Throttle?" Charley knew it was a stupid question. Of course he wasn't, but it was the only thing she could think of to say.
Charley's voice seemed to bring him back to the world around him. He closed the device and turned to look at her, "I'm probably not, but I think I'm well on my way to being better. Look, Charlene, I still have lots of stuff that I need to work through. But I'm hopin' that maybe… I mean could you still possibly want to…"
Charley chuckled a little while running her hand down his cheek. "I told you what I felt, do you think that just disappeared. Don't you know that really loving a person is being there to help them get through all the stuff? We can be so good for each other and I want to make you happy. I love you, Throttle and I only wanted a chance to show you how much."
The consoling look in her tender jade eyes was offering him a peaceful haven and a place to finally rest his weary soul. He place both hands on either side of her face and began bring her closer to him when the sound of Vinnie bursting through the doors stopped him.
"Whoa….um… sorry to interrupt but we've been looking all over for you guys. Somethin' is going on with Stoker and they want us back at his room." Vinnie breathlessly told them smiling from the knowledge that his bro. was moving in the right direction.
"Oh no, what happened?"
"Don't know, Charley girl. They just told us to find ya and get to the chamber ASAP. Cole said he saw you two comin' in here so Modo went to the chamber and I hauled tail over here to get ya."
Throttle held Charley's hand and the three rush back praying the unthinkable hadn't happened. Walking closer to the chamber they immediately saw it was empty. Charley threw her arms around Throttle's neck and began crying and Vinnie walked up to the window touching it reverently, "You'll be missed old man," quietly slipped from his lips."
Soon Modo walked out from the room not far down the hall and smiled looking at the sad threesome, "Guys, he'll be touched by your show of emotion, but its a bit premature he's been moved to intensive care but it looks like he'll be fine. You want to come see him, but you can only stay for a few minutes.
Relieved they walked down the hall a few steps and saw Stoker lying in bed looking a little tired but sitting up smiling, "What's up mud puppies? Good looking at those ugly mugs of yours, even you punk."
"Please, old man that's what probably pulled you through needing to see this fine work of art and enjoying all the Van Wham charm," Vinnie joked walking up to Stoker's side and picking up his hand grasping it tightly.
Carbine was sitting next to him on the bed with her arm gently wrapped around the pillow he laid on, "Excuse me, but I think it was my face that pulled him through thank you, Vincent."
"You know it was, gorgeous," he turned and she leaned down to kiss him softly on the lips.
"So Rookie by the way you are holding on the Charley girl you finally wised up and told that beautiful lady how you felt, took you long enough.
"Yeah Stoke, with a little help from my mom, I finally did. I'll tell you all about it later."
"Okay everybody out, I want to spend a little time with my husband if you don't mind and he needs to rest."
"You can't argue with the General, you guys better go. We'll talk later." Stoker reached over and held Carbine's hand.
"In the morning then, Teach? And Carbine thanks for everything." Throttle wrapped his arm around Charley and Vinnie and Modo followed them out.
Stoker looked questioningly into the eyes of his young wife, "Thanks, what was that for."
"Let just say you aren't the only teacher around here. We can talk about it later, now I just want to lay here and love you a little." She snuggled climbing all the way onto the bed completely encircling him in her arms.
"Now I can get use to this." He rested feeling the warmth of her body enfolding him.
****
"I'm glad he'll be okay they really need each other," Modo said looking happily over at the other couple walking arm in arm.
"Yeah, I guess having one woman can have its advantages, but I still say there's too many lovelies that haven't had a chance to sample all that is, Vinnie Van Wham." The ego infused young Martian flexed proudly almost walking into the wall while admiring himself while passing a near by window.
"That's if you don't knock your brains out admiring yourself so much? Hey Throttle, so you and Charley-girl an item now," Modo smiled.
Throttle stopped and turned Charley toward him pushing a loose hair from her face and finishing the kiss Vinnie interrupted.
Yep, I guess they are. Let's leave them to sometime alone, Vincent, maybe we can find some company at the base lounge." Modo suggested, mostly getting Vinne to follow him.
"You're singing my kind of song big guy let's book. There are too many lady's wanting for my company." Vinnie beamed hurrying down the hall.
"Enjoy the night you two," Modo doubt that they heard him and followed his eager young friend.
Throttle pulled back from Charley for just a second, "You positive this is want you want, Charlene. I'm not so sure I'm the best thing for ya, but I'm sure gonna to try and make you as happy as I can."
"All we can do is try, my love. There are no guarantees, you know. Just promises and lots of hard work to keep them and I think we'll do just fine." She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him back down to continue their journey through the ecstasy of a new love and brighter future.
Music to finished the scene off just right:
Your love is magical
That's how I feel
But I have not the words
Yet to explain
Gone is the graceful
Expressions of passion
But there worlds of way to explain
To tell you how I feel
But I am speechless, speechless
That's how you make me feel
When I am with you
I am far away
And nothing is for real
When I with you
I'm lost for words
I don't know what to say
My head spinning like carousel
So silently I pray
Helpless and hopeless
That's how I feel inside
Nothing's real but
All is possible
If God is on my side
When I'm with you
I'm in the light
Where I cannot be found
It's as though I'm standing
In the place call hallowed ground
Speechless
Speechless
That's how you make me feel
Though I'm with you
I am far away
And nothing is for real
I'd go anywhere
And do anything
Just to touch your face
There's no mountain high
I cannot climb
I'm humbled in your grace
Speechless
Speechless
That's how you make me feel
When I'm with you
I'm lost for words
And nothing is for real
Speechless
Speechless
That's how you make me feel
When I'm with you
I'm lost for words
And nothing is for real
Speechless
Your love is magical
That's how I feel
But in your presents
I am lost for words
Words like…..
I love you
Song by Michael Jackson
Invincible CD