Clarke walked through the door of her and Finn's apartment holding their five year old daughter Caroline's hand. She slipped off her heels and tossed them to the side before turning to her daughter and unstrapping her shoes from her feet. Caroline hadn't let go of her hand since they left for the funeral and Clarke didn't want to let her go either. Clarke didn't know if Caroline fully understood what was going, but she knew she wasn't in a good mood. How could she when she just went to her dad's funeral.

Clarke knelt down to Caroline's level, "I think ice cream for dinner sounds like a good idea."

Caroline just nodded, normally she would have been bouncing off the walls just at the mention of ice cream, but the usual sparkle in her eyes was gone and she barely said anything. Clarke stood up, taking her hand and led her back to her room to get her changed out of her black dress and into her minion pajamas. After getting Caroline's pajamas, Clarke went to her own room to change into pajamas.

She walked into the room, closing the door behind her and leaning on it. She looked over the room, it was just as she left it. The bed was made, Finn's clothes were thrown on the floor and his towel was laying in the doorway of the bathroom. Clarke hadn't moved anything, it just didn't feel right and even though she hated it when he did that, she couldn't imagine him not being there for her to yell at for leaving his stuff on the floor like he was 4.

Clarke messed with the engagement ring on her finger, Finn had died just over a week ago and she still hadn't taken it off. She didn't know if she was supposed or not. But to her it didn't feel right to take it off, so she didn't. After all, he would still be here if it wasn't for her. He had been texting her about dinner plans when he was hit. If she hadn't been texting him then maybe he would have been watching the road and not looking at his phone. She could have just talked to him when he got home.

Clarke quickly changed and pushed her thoughts back as she took the tub of chocolate ice cream out of the freezer and put some in two bowls. She put in Finding Nemo and they sat on the couch wrapped up in blankets with their ice cream. Clarke couldn't help but glance next to her where Finn normally sat, commentating the whole movie, making Caroline laugh hysterically. She missed hearing his voice and how he would say I love you every five seconds. Now Clarke just wished she would have appreciated more and said it more to him.

By the time the movie ended, Caroline was fast asleep in Clarke's lap. Clarke carried her back to bed and then went to her own room just as her phone buzzed with a call from her manager, Indra.

"I know this probably isn't a good time, but that new show 'The Grounders' is offering you the lead role of Elyza."

"The one that Lexa Woods is writing?" Clarke asked.

"Yeah, that one."

"When do they need me?"

"In two weeks they want to have a cast and crew meeting/party on the 29."

"Yeah, I can do that."

"Ok, cool. I'll send you the information by e-mail. Before you go, how are you doing with everything?"

Clarke hated that question, it always made her want to cry non stop, "I've been better."

"you know if you need anything, to call me, right?"

"I know. I'll make sure to call you first."

"Good, well, I gotta go."

"I'm about to go to bed anyway. I'll talk to you later."

Clarke definitely didn't sleep. She had terrible dreams about the day Finn died and even dreams about the day her dad died, 3 years ago. Clarke got up and decided to go watch TV, on her way she checked on Caroline who was still sound asleep in her bed.

While she was awake, Clarke made a decision that she would never fall for someone ever again. This would keep her from going through that pain ever again. She didn't need someone anyway, she had Caroline to take care of and a new show to film.

***

The cast party wasn't so bad. Bellamy, one of Clarke's close friends and co-star, was there along with his sister, Octavia, who Clarke had met when they were twelve on her first movie. Octavia was her best friend, but she moved to L.A at 18 while Clarke stayed in New York.

Clarke met , Lincoln, Harper, Anya and Echo. They had a good conversation, but Bellamy could see that Clarke wasn't all there and pulled her out of the conversation. Octavia joined them, telling Clarke how much she wished she could've been here sooner, but Clarke told her not to worry about it, that she understood she was busy finishing filming her movie in Vancouver.

"Clarke, how have you been? And don't tell me you're fine."

"Honestly, I'm miserable. Caroline's barely said a word in three weeks and I don't what I'm supposed to do without him."

Bellamy put his arm around her, unable to come up with something to say. He knew she was sick of people telling her how sorry they were, so he just put his arm around her. He watched as she put her hand on the ring on her finger.

"And the longer he's gone, the worse I feel."

Bellamy leaned forward, grabbing a beer from the cooler on the floor, he handed it to her. "I know everyone says not to use alcohol as an escape, but after these past few weeks, I think you deserve it."

Clarke shrugged as she took the drink from his hand, looking across the room to see Octavia and Lexa appearing to be in a deep, serious conversation, which wasn't normally Octavia's thing. She was more of a have fun now and worry about business later kind of person. Clarke then noticed a shorter brunette girl with her arm around Lexa's waist and Lexa's around her.