Warning: Injured infant, self-harm, reference to past sexual abuse.
"... If you embrace it, you can understand the Zone's true meaning."
Believe it or not Jasper liked the apocalypse. Before it, all he was doing was following his twin sister from foster home to foster home, getting angrier and angrier, caring less and less. He wasn't very good at being decent how it was before. He couldn't hold down a job, he had night terrors, and he was too damn mouthy.
Now, he could protect people, they needed him, and he liked it. He was glad it was the doc's family too. He liked his foster siblings. Emmett, happy, if slightly haunted now. Edward, he still hated, but it was a childish sort of dislike, which relieved him. Sometimes he felt a little too old, too stretched thin, but at least he hated Edward irrationally and pettily.
Plus, there was Alice, he never not liked her, but she was scared and sad now, not at all like she used to be. It didn't suit her, this life, but he was sure she would bounce back. In the meantime, he would help her survive.
Rosalie suited the apocalypse too, she took the body armor of a dead cop they'd found and ripped a scar into her cheek to deter any human men from coming after them because of her looks. She still looked as beautiful as always, even with the angry knotted line down the side of her face. They worked as well together as they always did too, and he knew that they were indefinitely useful to the family, and there was no system to take them away either. Jasper felt sort of bad that the good doc was forced to keep them, but part of him knew the man was too kind-hearted. The man needed someone like Jasper to remind him that he had to look out for his own first.
Luckily, Carlisle didn't have to put up with them alone. Mrs Esme Evenson, another foster parent, was also with them, offering another adult voice.
There were things that still irked him. Rosalie's relationship got physical with Emmett quick, and Jasper wasn't sure the nice goof was certain enough in this life to be certain about it. A little boy's crush was one thing, but Emmett didn't get to pretend she was broken and needing fixing, Rosalie was hardening herself up and she was not letting him touch her back.
Edward was too soft for this, it wore him down, and now a panic attack could mean his death. But Jasper needed his quick thinking and pair of hands, and they didn't have time to ease him into it. Esme wasn't too bad for a woman who watched her husband die; she got bossy, but she cared. Jasper humored her, if only for those little moments, when she tucked in the collar of his shirt or brushed some hair out of his eyes. Maybe the world ended but he never stopped wanting a mother.
Thank god, the doc was rich when it still mattered. The converted garbage truck was half a million dollars, but money didn't matter now. It fit up to eight people, but they were only seven. It didn't have aircon and got disgustingly hot, it was slow, and nerves got frayed quick, but it was low to the ground and could knock down a brick wall. They'd survive in a vehicle like this.
Alice, sweet little Alice. She crawled into his bed almost every night and he liked cuddling up and tucking her next to him. He knew Edward was furious and the doc worried, but he wasn't his sister, Jasper never needed sex to calm down. Their trauma had the opposite effect on them both; one was repulsed, the other hyper. But there wasn't enough stability to fix it right now.
Their most pressing concern was hard to articulate. They frequently ran into a motorcycle gang. All in thick helmets and leather everything else and none of them ever stopped. Faceless and, most harrowing of all, aimless. The first time the gang found them; they hadn't known what to do, huddled in the truck. The confrontation was null; they circled the truck for a few minutes before driving off.
It was always like that; this threat that never climaxed. It unnerved and stressed everyone; but there wasn't anything they could do about it. Jasper hadn't managed to get ahold of many handguns, and only he could shoot. This gang had rifles mounted onto the sides of their bikes. He just feverishly hoped they'd never use them.
o0o
"I want to find Jacob." Edward told them one day. The boy he'd loved, was discovered with pants-down in his red truck, flushed and humiliated. Jasper had envied him, he always smiled. But Jacob had had a dad and a baby to look after and they'd lost contact almost before this all happened. "I need him - I need to know he's alive." Edward said quietly. The boy was breaking apart and Jasper knew that Jacob could help. The doc agreed, and they sort of liked having a mission that was more than 'don't die and avoid the motorcycles'.
Doc didn't like how good he himself was with the sniper, or the crossbow. But they needed steady hands, focus, and he bought it. Carlisle didn't like his children toting around weapons either, Jasper thought the man might cry when Alice truly began to show real skill with the slim little silver blades she kept sheathed at her wrists. She was adapting, and Jasper was really proud. Edward though, was shattering a little each day they didn't find Jacob. There wasn't much they could do; the internet was no-more, as none of them were skilled enough to make it happen, and radio frequencies were all guerilla and coded.
"We might find him, yet, dear," The doc hastened to reassure his longest foster. But Edward sank into despair and his medication ran out. After Emmett caught Edward hiding and snipping the underside of his forearm with cuticle scissors. After that, Edward wasn't allowed near anything that posed a cutting threat, and Esme made herself his babysitter.
o0o
Then Emmett tried to touch Rose one too many times, only for the sake of plain affection and Ms Platt ended up sleeping next to her now. Rosalie was livid that he rejected her sex like a skittish horse, and spent more time with Jasper, which meant, for him, less time with Alice.
But he wouldn't begrudge his own sister. They had camped for the night; luckily most of the animals that survived were edible. Jasper had to wish that the mosquitoes hadn't, though. They sat away from the fire that had been set up, where the other four ate. At least now he wasn't strictly their foster father, the doc knew that he couldn't comment of their eating habits any longer. Jasper, though, didn't stash food anymore, and Rosalie just waited until no one was looking at her to eat.
Right now, though, Rosalie wasn't eating, she was fuming and picking at the pink scar tissue on her face. She kept glaring at Emmett's head, though he had his back to them, and seemed to be busy convincing Edward to eat something. "You should've been slower with him." Jasper told her calmly.
Rosalie tutted; her pride bruised too much by his rejection to admit that her brother had a point. "I was hard up," she snapped, leaving her scar alone and crossing her arms, "no one would say that of a man." She added bitterly.
Jasper shrugged. "He's a sweet boy, not a man."
"Fine." She let out a deceivingly light sigh, "I'll find something else."
Jasper could only imagine that her next trauma fixation would involve. Something just as visceral as sex, probably. "I love you." He told her honestly. It felt nice to say it out loud, no one was listening; half the world was gone.
"Me too." Rosalie muttered, casting him a curious look. "You get affectionate a lot these days."
He flicked a lock of her hair that fell into her face. "Well no one can take us away from the doc." Jasper explained. "I know it might bug him, I know he doesn't like some of the things I do, but I'm glad he's too good to leave me by myself." He said. He could be a lot of things, but he couldn't be alone.
"Leave us by ourselves." Rosalie corrected instantly, and it calmed him. "… You are the only reason we made it this far." She said, her tone was harsh and cruel. "Edward's too chicken shit, Emmett is too soft, doc's too good, Alice's too gentle and Ms is too nervous. They need us, and you think they'd rather drop us?" Rosalie asked, gently incredulous and just as derisive. "We're family, it's us, Jazz."
"Alright Rosie." Jasper griped, not feeling very comfortable with her words. He nodded to Emmett, who tried to subtly peek over to them. "You know he likes you, just be gentle with him." Jasper told her, ignoring the way her shoulders raised up to her ears defensively. "He's a bit fragile. He's too soft, doesn't wanna do this stuff, he wants to be soft to you." It was true; Emmett needed tactile affection, big guy that he was. But Rosalie just needed the act of sex, she couldn't handle anything else.
It seemed she knew that too, raising her hands and waving them away. "Fine, fine!" She said heatedly. "Don't you lecture me, little Alice crawling under your covers every night. Like you could make her stop." She added.
"That's all she does! She don't make me do nothing." Jasper protested. He was not going to tell his sister that sometimes Alice used his fingers on herself, when she said her own got too boring. "She don't make me do shit." He insisted. This wasn't like Maria; seventeen, crammed in that festering foster house with him on the few occasions Rosalie and he had gotten split up. He had been fourteen and he hadn't known how to say 'no', then. He thought boys weren't allowed to. But that was four years ago, and he knew better now.
"Fine, fine." Rosalie seemed content to drop the subject, but that night, Jasper hadn't let Alice come into his bed. She didn't pout or complain, she didn't even seem surprised. She kissed his forehead and ordered him not to have any nightmares. The sentiment was sweet, but it didn't help. He'd had the biggest night terrors he'd suffered in a while; woken everyone else up with his screaming and crying. Alice nearly wrapped her entire body around his head when he woke up. From then on, no one looked twice when they slept together in his bunk.
o0o
Ms Evenson put Edward-watch on hold to do the laundry by a river, but they'd missed the group of despicables, with their machetes. Descpicables are what happened when career criminals and felons can't be kept in a prison any longer. They swung their blades around, demanding the women be handed over. But they hadn't expected Rosalie to stab one of them as soon as they grabbed her, or that Jasper would realize how blunt their blades were. He was whipped across the head with one before Emmett tackled the man to the ground.
Doc's rules were finite: no killing. But Jasper also refused to let resources like rope get wasted tying them up. So he taught Emmett to punch, properly, and repeatedly, until they stopped moving at all. There were only four; but more might follow them.
Ms Evenson lost a few of their shirts when they'd had to run quick. It made her very upset. Perhaps more than upset, with the way she broke down and started to cry, burying her face in her hands.
"I'm not useful!" She bawled, as Jasper drove haphazardly down the highway. He hated the open space, but the disadvantage of a garbage truck was its width. It was the doc who cradled her close. "These kids, they're so strong, and they're so brave, I'm just bringing you all down." She whispers. "You don't owe me anything, I don't have anything to offer you." For a terrifying moment, it seemed she might ask to leave. It was enough for the doc to demand Jasper pull over, and for him to comply.
She ignored the children's plea for her to stay, and said she needed to clear her head. Emmett sat next to Alice and they sadly watched her wander away. Rosalie huddled next to Jasper, still in the driver's seat, and neither of them trusted the permanency of adults, anyway. The doc wiped Emmett's split knuckle, and didn't look higher than the ground.
It was Edward that strode after her; head held high for the first time in months. "Please don't go away." He told her quietly. "Um, I like when you pet my shoulder and say 'good job'. And um I like that you braid Rosalie's hair everyday even when your fingers are all red from washing and cooking. And um you're the only one that has time to listen to me." He says each action like they were small miracles. To children who only lived conditionally, who never really had constant adults in their lives even before the world ended, maybe it was.
Edward begins to smile, then. "Plus no one else reminds Emmett to wash his face. You compliment Alice when she scratches pictures into trees. I was afraid that they'd leave me behind too, but they won't they're our family." Edward told her confidently, hopefully.
Esme came to him and cupped his lean face in her once-soft hands. "Oh, ... you are a good boy." He told him gently. "You're a very good boy." He offers his elbow to her, and escorts her back to the truck proudly. She isn't abashed by her episode; she apologizes for making them loose time, but told them she needed the release. It reminds them all that she, herself, wouldn't judge tantrums or Edward's self-harming instances, because she understood. She'd never shame or scold them for their emotions.
There was a pause, of peace, of calm, of some fragile comradery. Before the roar of motorcycles rumbles down the road.
"Not now," Alice gasps, looking pained.
"Edward, you'll have to drive." Esme told him, and the boy nodded. Jasper worked best under stressful situations, but Edward had always been the better driver.
They can't outpace the bikes, though they last fifteen minutes. One of the cruisers revs in front of the truck, trying to cut Edward off.
"I'm ramming him!" Edward declared, stamping on the gas so hard that the truck jerks forward with a high-pitched screech.
"Edward, no!" The doc gasps, but the bike peels off the road before the bumper took them out. Emmett crowed in victory, only moments before three bikes converged in front of them.
The doc actually growls in frustration. He rolls down the window to the passenger side seat and sticks his head out.
"What are you doing!?" Esme gasps, and Jasper grabs the back of the man's jacket and tries to pull him back.
"Stop it!" The doc snaps at them, struggling against Jasper's hold.
"Alice is having another seizure!" Rosalie calls out, and Jasper's grip goes slack against the doc's clothes to look back at her.
She was standing at the back of the truck, frozen in spot, blinking rapidly, her head rocking back and forth just so. But her balance was always awful when she had an episode, and the truck was speeding fast.
A particularly vicious bump sent her limply sideways, but Esme and Rosalie stumbled to her and caught her in time.
In the confusion, the doc had most of his shoulders out of the window. "What do you want!" He demands of the closest biker, his strong voice carrying over the roar of the wind. They were going 80 at this point and the truck had yet to be able to go any faster.
"Oh fuck!" Rosalie calls out, but she was staring at him, stunned at the doc's actions.
Jasper grasps more of the doc's jacket and yanked harder. "Get back in here!" He yelled, while trying to look over the doc's shoulder and see if any of the gang were reaching for their rifles. "Emmett, help me!" Jasper snapped.
"You've been terrorizing us for months! Tell me what you want!" The doc continued his mad charade, fighting against Jasper's hold, until Emmett grabbed his hips and yanked him backwards.
The doc is thrown back inside, landing almost completely on top of Jasper and sending them both to the floor, hard. The impact between the floor and the doc's back forces all the air out of the Jasper's lungs. But the yank was too forceful and sent Emmett's elbow into Edward's face.
Edward reared back with a scream and with him jerked the wheel, as blood spurted from his nose.
For a terrifying moment, the truck lurches to the left, until Emmett can straighten the wheel for Edward, mindlessly babbling apologies.
But there's a crunching sound and a loud bang in the moments before the truck is back under control, and the motorcycles rear off almost instantly. The sudden movement seemed to scare them away.
"You hit one of the bikers!" Rosalie yelled, her face pressed against the rear window. She had sat Alice through her attack. Jasper kicks the doc hard in the spine to get him off faster. Heaving in air and dizzy beyond belief, Jasper throws himself up against his sister. He cradles Alice's head to his chest with the action, her eyes dull and distant.
The bikers had indeed crowded in a circle, some dismounted, hauling up the leather-clad body of one of them.
"Is he dead?" Jasper wheezes, his vision a little fuzzy and blurring around the edges.
"No; but they're not riding that hog anytime soon." Rosalie replied, her sharp eyes finding something that led her to believe there had been no casualties today.
Esme was behind the wheel now, the truck going much slower, as the doc wrenched Edward's nose back into place.
"Emmett, it was such a dangerous thing to do!" The doc scolded the shamed young man, dabbing at Edward's blotchy face.
"What he did was dangerous!?" Rosalie demanded, glaring at the doc as she marched up to him. Jasper sat heavily next to Alice; his hand still cradling the back of her head, pressing her forehead to his sternum. He was too winded to do much, but his ire was with Rosalie.
"You could have gotten us all killed! They could have shot you in the head, and sprayed the inside of the truck with bullets after your corpse fell out!" She screamed.
The doc gaped, for a moment, before collecting himself. "They've shown no violence in the past! This bizarre stalemate has gone on long enough! I wanted it over!" The doc thundered.
Jasper couldn't stand a grown man yelling at his sister, and released Alice to struggle to his own feet. "You put us all in danger!" Jasper yelled at him, lurching forward and poking a finger into the older man's chest. "You're not our foster father any longer; you don't get to make unquestionable decisions!"
Carlisle draws himself up to his full height, a scant inch shorter than Jasper. "And you are no leader yourself!" He shot back. "You're a child; you think you can continue stabbing your way through problems? If there's a chance for reason – I'm taking it!" His tone was authoritative, and rubbed against Jasper's crumbling nerves like sandpaper.
"There's no society left to reason with!" Jasper shouted back. "I may be a child, but right now you're the only one here being immature!" He turns to the rest of the people in the truck. "Who here wanted to try and reason with the bikers!? Who here agreed to risk opening the window of our otherwise bullet-proof truck!?" He demanded. No-one answered; Emmett looked frightened, almost clinging onto Edward's shoulders, who himself looked furious, Rosalie had her teeth bared, and Alice was still awake, but not aware.
"That's enough!" Esme exploded from the driver's seat, her voice raised for the first time since the world ended. "I want Carlisle up here with me! Jasper, stay with Alice and we won't mention your ugly words to her!" She demanded. Shocked with her outburst, everyone does as she says, and the truck descends into an awful, tense silence.
"… What happened?" Alice's questioning voice was soft and slightly slurred. Jasper scooted closer to her and took her chubby cheeks in his hands. Her gaze flickered over to his.
"The biker gang came again." He told her shortly, and waited for her to nod, just a little.
He released her face as she looked around the truck. Edward and Emmett sat nearer the front, shoulders jammed together protectively. Carlisle and Esme were engrossed in some conversation in the front seat. Rosalie curled up by herself in her bunk, back to the rest of them.
"Are you alright?" He asked her, usually her speech wasn't affected after an attack. But Alice nodded again, the spark slowly returning to her eyes.
"Is Edward?" She asked, as the boy looked back at her with a gore-streaked face.
"I'll be fine," Edward told her, his tone cold. He turned an accusing gaze to Jasper. "I think Carlisle makes a better leader than you would." He added heatedly.
Jasper gritted his teeth in a snarl. "I'm not trying to be the leader!" He snaps. "I'm trying to keep us alive!"
"You're an asshole." Edward tells him, his voice low but threatening.
Only Jasper didn't feel particularly threatened by a boy with a bloody nose. "I don't disagree." He countered tersely.
"There's always room for hope." Edward declared, and Jasper nearly laughed in his face. "There's always a chance that we can make something better, now that it's all been razed to the ground." He implored.
"We can build something new." Alice agreed softly, smiling at them all vaguely, as though she could see a future that they couldn't. Even Emmett nodded with conviction. Rosalie openly gaped at them, and Jasper almost did the same.
"There's nothing left!" He pointed out, waving a hand to the deserted highway they drove. "No schools, no public transport, no foster care! Entire cities are just ruins now." He said.
Edward shook his head. "If we give up hope, then it really is just ruins." He urges. "Until then, we can remember that we don't have to salt the earth and abandoned everything we did before." Their heartfelt faces made Jasper even dizzier than being winded did. He felt panicked and - just for a moment - scared. That all this glowing promise they seemed to hold would sign their death warrents and his along with them. He looks away, to Rosalie, but she had her golden head bowed, like a protective curtain.
As sickeningly naïve as it was; Jasper almost wanted to believe them all. That Carlisle's position as a doctor left him not only with useful skills in first aid; but also an unending ability to keeping caring, not just about the foster children he didn't need to take care of anymore, but humanity as a whole. They were a ragged group of seven; the thousands, maybe still millions, of people left on earth was almost boggling to think about.
But it produced some sort of peace between them all. Some sort of philosophical understanding. Maybe it was too soon and raw after complete destruction to start thinking about rebuilding and hope; but thoughts led to words, and words led to actions soon enough.
o0o
They find Jacob, recognize his voice on the radio channels, though the words he spoke were foreign. The locations he named in English, though, they raced to desperately. He was in a shopping mall; defending a small hoard of medicine and food, nearly alone. He lost his father and barely kept the baby he'd been placed with in his last foster home.
Jasper knew he was very unshakeable, but that little grinning girl with one eye and no left index finger almost made him cry. They're very careful with his baby, Bella; who Jacob had gotten attached to. She was only twenty months old. Surprisingly, it was Emmett took it upon himself to be aware of the girl's every move; and it was easy to tell he was glad for someone to dote on.
It was surprising that Rosalie didn't want anything to do with the baby. The girl who nearly always prioritized the younger foster kids over herself since she was seven. One day, Esme asked her why.
"I don't want to dirty her." Rosalie whispered, looking wide-eyed at the sweet baby with a constant wink.
Jasper was extremely relieved to have Jacob with them. He did what he was told and only shook after the job was done. Edward wasn't breaking any more than he already had, and with time he might actually start healing.
They vehicle fit them just about, but left no room for Miss and Doc to not share. Jasper didn't care what happened on that end, he didn't have to; the Doc was a good man, and Miss might've just been getting a little lonely.
Edward had cried into Jake's chest the first morning with them. "I thought I'd never see you again!" He sobbed.
Jake smiled down at the boy affectionately. "I'm so happy I found you again." He admitted softly, stroking a hand through Edward's hair. "I need you too." He added gently.
Jasper favorite team to go on a supply run was Himself, Rosalie and Jacob. Sometimes Alice, but her seizures were getting worse with little medicine left and she knew she was being a liability. Jasper thought she was the exact opposite, but she couldn't run with them, it was too dangerous. Even if Jasper had managed to find a handgun, though Carlisle made him promise to use it only as a last resort.
The shops were getting depleted pretty fast, and soon Jasper was worried they'd be completely empty. But it wasn't a thought he could entertain right now. Jacob had suggested a garden they could come back to with little maintenance, and Jasper hoped one day they could do it.
o0o
But if they did make that garden, Jacob wouldn't be there to tend to it.
o0o
The motorcycle gang came a week after Jacob and baby Bella joined them. Six people on a hog each, and they all scrambled to the truck. Esme was bundling Bella into a too-large baby booster they'd padded with rolled up t-shirts. Emmett was throwing their supplies haphazardly straight through the open back doors, everyone was scurrying, except for Jacob. He stood, watching the cloud of dust the bikes kicked up behind them.
"We need to move!" Jasper growled at him. "Move now!" Jasper had his handgun and the doc was just aiming his crossbow as the bikes got closer.
"Wait! Wait, please!" Jake yelled, running in front of them and throwing his repacked duffle to his feet. "They're here for me." He explained breathlessly, eyes wide and hopeful.
"… You led them here?" Edward asked quietly, his heart in his eyes.
"But you've only been with us for a week!" Emmett protested, as though he could argue any words he didn't like. "They've been following us for much longer than that!"
Jacob scuffed his shoes in the dirt. "I tried to tell them where I was, but it's hard to find the airtime …." His gaze softened as he glanced behind him and raised a hand. Several of the bikers waved back. "They just wanted to come and get me." He explained.
"Who are they!?" Rosalie demanded.
"My family, from back home!" Jake explained, and despite the palpable anger from the others, he began to grin like a boy. "Before I was put into the system. Now that it doesn't exist, I can go back to them." Jacob said. Jasper hated that the boy even had a home.
Jake explained that he had been keeping a tiny pocket radio on him, switching between frequencies trying to find his family and give them his location.
"What do you mean? Where's your home?" Edward demanded, hands fluttering nervously around Jake's shoulders.
The man leading the bikes pulled off his helmet. "Jake; you said you'd be ready as soon as we got here." He said gruffly. It was strange, finally seeing a face from the pack that had chased them for so long. He was surprisingly young; perhaps only a little older than Jasper.
"I am, Sam, I just gotta say goodbye." Jake told him. He looked at them all, and he seemed guilty. "I needed help, after dad …." His voice broke and his chin wobbled terribly, and Jasper felt a little bad for him to be seen so weakly in public like this.
Another of the bikers pulled of their helmet, a face grinning at them. "His dad left," he yelled, looking at Jake, "saying he was gonna find you! But he never came back!" His smile slipped, when Jake just shook his head. There was a shifting between the bikers, and Sam seemed very sad, for just a moment.
"You're taking Bella away?" Rosalie asked, her own voice shaky. Despite the fact that she couldn't touch the little thing, she leaned her body towards the bundle being rocked by Esme, hovering in her personal space.
Jake shook his head looking pained, his shoulders slumped as he went to give his finger to Bella's little chubby fist. "No, I can't …" He glanced back at the bikers, waiting mostly patiently, but silently, not disagreeing. "I can't look after her." He whispers. There was guilt in his face as he looked at Esme. "I was hoping, I was really praying-"
The doc pets his shoulder. "Jake, go with your family." He tells the boy calmly, "She'll be safe with us."
His expression and shoulders lifted. "Thank you …" He said fondly. He leaned down and kissed the baby's forehead, before going to Edward. Edward grasped at his hands tightly, eyes wide and mouth twisted into some desperate snarl. "I'm sorry, I can't stay." Jake told him.
Edward stood on his toes to put their faces closer together. "You can stay in touch?" Edward asked him quietly, to Jake's one nod. Edward's hand drifted down to Jake's belt, where his personal radio was clipped. "Then go," Edward decided, his hands no longer gripping, but cradling the other's. "I don't … you should go." Edward said, and Jake swayed down, as though to kiss, but Edward took a step away, gaze averted.
Jake took up his duffle and looked at them all as a group. "Thank you all." He said, nodding, before turning and walking over to Sam. He climbs on behind the man, and they don their helmets and rev up again.
The gang blasts down the long stretch of road, and Jake raises one hand in good-bye, before they disappears into the distance.
It's an unspecified doomsday event, and I love the idea of the wolf pack being a biker gang in a Human!AU. And yeah, the title is from Bob's Burgers, and the quote at the beginning is from a woman on youtube that visits Chernobyl regularly.
