A/N: Gah! I can't seem to get ZackXCloud out of my head lately. It's just so… adorable!

But I like too many different pairings that contradict one another for my own good: ZackXCloud, CloudXAerith, ZackXAerith, CloudXTifa, TifaXAerith, ZackXTifa, TifaXYuffie, CloudXReno, RenoXRude, one-sided, creepy!SephirothXCloud (in which Cloud hates his former hero for going bad, but Sephi becomes stalker-sadistic-eerie-obsessed with the blondie), KadajXCloud, LozXKadajXYazoo, DenzelXMarlene, and even crossovers like DenzelXNamine (Kingdom Hearts), Leon/SquallXCloud, Leon/SquallXAerith, RenoXAxel, RenoXRoxas, and RenoXRoxasXAxel.
…Yup, I'm pretty much insane. LOL. 8D

Ahem.

ANYWAY, this particular oneshot, however, revolves around the following of my favorite pairings: ZackXCloud main, with some CloudXTifa, TifaXAerith, CloudXAerith, and DenzelXMarlene on the side (if you squint, lulz).

In Cloud's POV, if you can't tell. And this takes place just before the events of Advent Children. X3

(And yes, I did get the title from a song by Blue. I'm so unoriginally lately. XD )

"Cloud," she says, her voice soft and low and caring, precisely like how Aerith's used to be. She doesn't normally act this way, but when she does, I tend to listen more carefully to what she has to say. A sigh escapes her lips as she sits down beside me at the empty bar. Without hesitation, she plucks the shot-glass from my fingers, the alcohol within untouched. "Honestly! I don't know what's gotten into you, but you never used to be like this. At least, not all of the time."

I say nothing, and continue to stare at the colorful range of liquor on the shelves behind the bar counter.

She shakes her head before tilting it toward me, trying to peer past my blond bangs. "Do you want to talk about it, or am I going to have to leave a message like everybody else?" she half-teases, half-murmurs in concern.

"I'm not sure what there is to say," I mutter at length. I lightly turn my head towards her, eyes flickering over to her face. Her hair is much shorter than it used to be, and her clothing style has changed like mine has. But we are still the same people that we were, and we know the same things our older selves knew. Not much has changed, not really. I might have, like she says, but I'm not sure. I'm not sure of anything any longer, not even of what words to use to express the emotions I carry with me like stones.

"There's plenty to say," she frowns, and touches her gloved hand to my naked right forearm. "If you'll just let me in, Cloud. I'll help you find the words to say."

She's always been my closest friend. She understands me as much as anybody can as of late. I glance at her, then cast my gaze to my limp fingers on the countertop. "Tifa," I murmur quietly, "I believe in you. I do. But I don't think…" I drift off, unsure yet again. I shake my head minutely. "I don't think I want to say what's on my mind."

"I'm pretty sure I can guess what's troubling you, Cloud," she says with a gentle smile. She winks at me. "So let's play a game. If I guess what's bothering you within three tries, you have to tell me about what you're thinking and feeling on the subject. Deal?"

I nearly smile. Instead, I look at her and nod my head. "Alright. Deal."

She smiles again. "Good." She pauses, glances around the room, laces her fingers together in thought, and then returns to gaze to me. "Here are my guesses: Zack. Aerith. Death."

It's all three. Tifa is spot-on, like always. She knows me better than I know myself, sometimes. I sigh and nod my head. "All of the above," I reply glumly. "You win."

She grins. "I knew I would." Her smile fades instantly, and like the flip of a coin, she's serious again. Tears fill her eyes, and she blinks them away. "But I wish I weren't so clever. Because half of the time, I'm thinking about those things, too." She sniffles, but doesn't cry. Always the fighter, like me. "I miss them. Especially Aerith; and poor Marlene… she misses Aerith, too. She even wears the same stupid pink bow, and braid." Tifa removes a glove and runs her bare hand through her hair. "And Zack. You two were close."

If only she know how close.

"The funny thing about being rendered nearly comatose," I say lowly, "Is that you are completely aware of what's going on around you, even if colors and motions are skewed. Everything looked fuzzy and too-green, and moved a little too slowly at times, but I could hear perfectly fine. And I remember all that happened." Tifa stare sat me, waiting for me to continue. I finally look at her again, directly into her dark brown eyes. "He took care of me, Tifa. He risked so much to protect me, keeping me safe and unharmed. I was like a doll, limp and useless, but he still talked to me as if I were awake. He still carried me around, but with dignity, as if I were simply a wounded soldier in need."

I feel like crying. Heat prickles behind my eyes, but I refuse to mourn. I would be pitying him if I mourned him too much, and I don't want to do that to him. He wouldn't have liked it.

I go on, "He took care of me, waiting for me to come back to my senses. I owed him everything, but…" I look away. "I didn't get a chance to repay him."

Tifa leans in closer and lays her hand on my shoulder blade this time, rubbing in soothing circles. "You don't have to hide it from me, Cloud. You can tell me that you loved him."

I stare at her in disbelief. How could she have figured me out? I blink at her, slowly. She smiles woefully, but genuinely. I shut my eyes and bow my head. "I… loved him," I admit. It's not entirely true; there should be no past tense there. In truth, I still love Zack. And each and every day, I wish for three things: that I can see him again. That I can touch him again. And that I can tell him how I feel.

When I lift my head up and look at her again, Tifa is nodding. "You love so many people, Cloud. And so many of them love you, too. We all care about each other because we're a family." She turns and looks over her shoulder at the doorway leading upstairs. "Right, Eavesdroppers?"

I hadn't even realized they were there. But as soon as Tifa calls this out, there is a squeak of being found, and then the appearance of the two who live with us: Denzel and Marlene.

The two brunette children come into sight, the boy scratching the back of his head and the girl looking at her feet while her hands remain clasped behind her back. "Sorry, Tifa," Marlene says in her teeny voice. "We didn't mean to eavesdrop."

Tifa laughs. "I know, I know. Come here," she says, and when the two timidly approach, she takes one of each of their hands and lays them on my back. I stiffen at first, and then soften under their small hands. "But that's okay, because Cloud needs your comfort right now anyhow."

Marlene looks up at me with her big, watery brown eyes. Without warning, she slams into me, the side of her face pressed against my back. I glance over my shoulder at her, and she gives me a squeeze. The little sister I never had. I smile despite myself. I unclasp her hands and turn around in my barstool to kneel down in front of her. "Thank you, Marlene."

Tears slip down her round face. "Don't be sad, Cloud," she whimpers. "We'll see them again. Onee-chan, and your friend, and anybody who has ever died. We'll see them again when we return to the Lifestream. Right?"

I brush her tears away with one hand, and nod my head. "That's right."

Denzel comes up beside the little girl and takes her hand in his to comfort her. She turns to rest her forehead on his shoulder. Looking directly into my eyes, blue to blue, the brunet states, "You're going to leave again soon, aren't you, Cloud?"

How did he guess? I nod my head nonetheless. "Yes, probably."

He nods once, already having predicted my response. "Thought so." He shakes his head at me. "Just… come back soon, okay?"

"I promise," I tell him lowly. I stand up, and meet Tifa halfway as she turns to face me. "Thank you for understanding," I murmur.

She smiles at me. "What are friends for?" And then she opens up her arms, offering a hug. But I don't want to give her one, not right now. I still have too much on my mind. But this doesn't slow her. Tifa simply lowers her arms, turns her hands to fists at her sides, and continues smiling at me. "We'll be waiting for you when you return."

"Thank you," I repeat for the third time. I mean it, though.

"Where will you go, Cloud?" Marlene says, rubbing one eye and looking up at me.

I glance down at her, and offer a sincere tone. "To the places where I remember them best."

"Like the church?" Marlene says.

"And the cliff?" Tifa murmurs.

I nod my head at both, and take a few steps forward, past the two children and toward the door. "Don't worry," I say to all of them, my back to them. "I'll be back before I'm missed."

As I'm walking out the door to my motorcycle, I hear Tifa say lightly, meant to be a joke, "With you, that's never the case." It winds up sounding truthfully sad.

I ignore her remark and close the entrance to the bar behind me. The bartender and the two orphans remain inside, already saying a silent goodbye.

And I start thinking about how much I hate goodbyes. They makes breathing all the more difficult; no one ever breathes easy when they are saying 'Goodbye…' to someone they care about. It hurts too much in their hearts for their lungs to work properly.

I think, out of everyone, I know this best.