Hari pote and de criminal of guardian of armies of traitors of enemies and officers and game with result without battle of the dark bound to your mom.
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
Harry woke up as book fell on his penis. He yelped in pain and rolled from bed and hit face on the floor and it hurt.
"owch" he said because he hit his face on the floor and it hurt.
but harry was kewl so he didn't care.
then he remembered his homework which was to research many super awesome spells for and use them to be kewl and stronk. So he looked at his humwork and thought:
"im gunna get full grade w these paper"
so he opend the door to go otside…
..WHEN A SUPER ANGRE DOGE burst from the door and ate hary's humwork! And snarled and rored cuse it was super scary
so harry thought:
"no problem cause I have MAGIC!"
but then the SUPER ANGRE DOGE spat out a huge globe of avada kedavra on harry cause when it ate the humwork it learned everything that was on it bcs that's how magic works, dumbass.
so harry sidestepped the thing and was all like
"wtffff"
Them the SUPER ANGRE DOGE that was super angre, bad, evil and mean cast a crucio spell on harry that reflected it whit his glasses but the SUPER ANGRE DOG opened his mouth and ATE IT
And by digesting it the SUPER ANGRE DOGE grew 10 feet and turned in to a furry deth eater dementor like verlisify
Harry didn't know what to do, he tried the anti-dementor ecspecto patron spell, as well as the anti-deth eater and anti-furry DOGE spell he called "supoer dark evil beem of destrustion and doom and POWAH" but in latin which was like "hail satan hail satan hail satan blah blah"
so the SUPER ANGRE DOGE took a step back in pain and yeowched but he was super stronk bcs he was dark sied so he did not die and he look at harry and said
"join the dark side we have poweh"
but harry said
"nop"
so the SUPER ANGRE DOGE saiud:
"I am your father"
but harry just pointed at the wall cause there was a picture of his dad right there and he wasn't so dumb
so the doge Jumped at HARRY AND HARRY JUMOPED AT THE SUPER ANGRE DOGE …
WHEN A TREE BRURST THRU THE WINDO AND HIT THEM BOTH
bc ron had stealed his fater fly car but he couldn't drive bcs he was 14 so he slammed into the tree and it flew at harry bc logic
but harry was super stronk and didn't die but the SUPER ANGRE DOGE dieded so Dumbledore went to hari and said
"congratulations harry you're hokage now"
and harry said
"ok but when can I sleep im tired"