Disclaimer: I do not own TVD.
She should have known that she could never be at peace with two Salvatore brothers on two arms.
Stefan. That's the only name embedded in her heart in fine prints, the only word that soothes her ears, the only person who nourishes her starving eyes. She loves Stefan, she tells everyone that she loves Stefan- her aunt, her friends, her enemies, that flower-seller on the other end of the town where Stefan takes her for many dates- everyone knows she loves Stefan. She tells this to Stefan every day. And she tells herself.
"If you don't break up with Stefan, it'll have consequences that you can't even imagine..." Katherine's voice rings in her ears, the vicious cruelty and evilness unaffected by passing time. The hostile look in her resolute eyes is now a staple in Elena's nightmares.
"I love Stefan". She tells Katherine firmly, her unwavering love making her stand firmly in front of a centuries old vampire who even won't blink an eye before ruthlessly killing someone standing in her way. She loves Stefan so much; she doesn't even care what may happen to her. Or so she keeps telling herself as she keeps up her resolute demeanor.
"Fine then" Katherine spits out in the tone that reminds her of venom and knives. "Damon will have to pay the price."
She wants Stefan. Katherine wants Stefan. Yet, Damon is the one who's on the line.
And God it's so twisted! That one threat breaks through the armor of determination that she's wearing and strikes somewhere in the weakest crack in her heart. Because no matter how many times a day she chants Stefan's name, she still can't fight the weakness she feels for Damon. Damon is strong, Damon is cunning, Damon can protect himself from any danger. And yet, she can't push him towards danger. She can't make herself push him towards danger, even with the knowledge that in all probability he can take care of himself.
So twisted.
It's been just a week after her "It's not working- slash- I can't take it anymore" break off with Stefan. She is done telling only half of the town about it, though the shocking news has already spread everywhere, she assumes. Because if Damon, of all people, knows, so should the rest of the town, right?
"Why did you break up with him?" he asks calmly, curiously, eyeing her with such intensity that it's making it difficult for her to lie and hold in the bit about Katherine. It makes her want to yell at him so bad.
"Yell at me", he says suddenly, as if he just read her mind, which she would have assumed was the case, if she wasn't wearing vervain. "Yell at me, you'll feel better."
She rolls her eyes in annoyance at his weird but tempting proposal, rejecting it with a shake of her head, and resumes walking towards the school entrance, but he's in front of her again, blocking her way.
"Damon." She really wants to snap, but she's so tired of everything, that his name becomes a weary sigh.
"Elena", he mocks her tone, smirking up at her, waiting for her eyes to narrow and the glare to form. It's just a matter of time and the right amount of irritation.
Of course she keeps on being predictable, and does just that, and he can't keep the smile off his face. He can now read her like an open book, without even consciously doing that.
"What's so funny?" she asks, a faint smile tugging at her lips. Damon rarely smiles so genuinely like that, but when he does, it's contagious. It makes her feel like the world just lighted up.
"Talk to me", he whispers softly instead, a touch of sincerity in his tone.
It touches her heart. It makes her want to speak. It makes her want to admit to him how difficult it was to look into Stefan's pained eyes and tell him that they were over, and not even give him a good reason for that. But she can't, because she loses herself in his eyes. Even with the vervain on, she's hypnotized. She can just keep staring and staring, till she is able to collect herself and walk away hastily.
God there's so much she cannot say!
Class with Stefan is hard as usual, awkward, weird, silence reigning in between whispered words of gossip between her classmates. She and Stefan are still not past one syllable, and she can't wait to get out.
When she does finally get out, she isn't too surprised to find Damon waiting for her. "So now you'll start being a stalker?" she raises an eyebrow, her head falling to her left side with a casual tilt.
"Actually, I was thinking about being a bodyguard, but hey, whichever you find creepier", he jokes, shoving his hands into the pockets of his jeans and flashing her a grin.
She smiles, baring her teeth only slightly, but some of the frustration of the day is gone now. She feels a lot lighter, a lot better.
It's gone in a while though, when she sees Stefan passing by, staring at her and Damon, with a look of hurt in his eyes.
She should feel hurt, she should feel shattered, she should feel all those things that she is supposed to feel since she loves Stefan. But all she feels is guilt. And that too, only till Damon places his hand on her shoulder and gently pats. He can be so sweet and caring when he wants. He can be so sweet and caring when she needs him to be.
She doesn't even try to hide her panic the next day when she sees a bruise on Damon's forehead. "Did you and Stefan fight?" she asks in alarm, her stomach doing a somersault of guilt and regret.
He scoffs. "Fight for what?"
She fixes him with a glare, her arms now crossed in front of her chest, and her legs locked together in a defensive gesture. She makes it clear that she isn't going anywhere till she gets her answer. He isn't the only stubborn one here.
"I bumped my head on my table last night when I was drunk", he mumbles, a bit embarrassed, but quickly recovers and attacks her with a smirk. "But it's good to see that you care about me."
"I don't care about you!" it isn't her fault if her scoff sounds a little too exaggerated and her voice quivers. That's what Damon does to her. "I care about Stefan."
His eyes now take on a look of challenge. "Then why did you break up with him?"
She wishes she could answer. She wishes she could find an answer, a real, convincing answer that didn't read on the lines of "Katherine made me do it".
Well, wishes are called wishes and not lottery tickets.
Stefan's sitting further away from her today, and now they're not even on the one syllable level. She frowns, wondering if Damon was actually telling the truth. There's no way to find out though, so she'll take what will give her some peace of mind.
Once school is over, she sighs dramatically when she finds Damon waiting for her again. "I can go home on my own, you know. I'm not a little girl."
"You are seventeen and I'm seventeen plus a hundred fifty and something, so what were you saying?" he lowers his head to her mouth, his ears facing her lips, as if he is waiting for her to say something, and again, she has to fight the urge to yell.
And really, it's almost funny. He's the predator, she's the prey, one bite and her life can end. Yet, she's not afraid. She feels safe. She's comfortable with him trailing behind her as she walks back home. It's strangely calming and comforting.
So twisted.
Aunt Jenna invites him in for a cup of coffee. She has never really been fond of Damon, and she probably never will be, but hospitality. Elena protests, says he doesn't need a coffee, says he needs to go home and all that. But he mocks a look of hurt and is inside her living room.
"How is your brother taking it?" Aunt Jenna asks.
Elena winces. It's the one topic that she doesn't want to talk about, the one conversation she wants to avoid, and yet here they are.
"Good, I guess", Damon mumbles, lighting nudging Elena with his elbow. "Better than Miss Grumpy here."
She hisses at him, tucking strands of her hair behind her ears. Damon makes her feel so nervous these days, especially when he is sitting so close. "You should go now."
"Okay", he surprisingly agrees, sipping his coffee in one chug, and smiles at her. "I'll see you tomorrow then."
And oh, now it's a routine. Just great!
She doesn't hear from Katherine anymore, she's partly curious and partly anxious, but most of all she's relieved. Relieved that Damon is okay. Never in her weirdest dreams did she imagine a day like this!
One week passes. Damon sees her at school every morning, Stefan grows more and more distant, Damon walks her home. The tension keeps mounting, yet the tension keeps dissolving as they fall together in an easy rhythm. One uneventful week passes.
Till that fateful day when Damon kisses her. That fateful day when she kisses him back. That fateful day when everything changes. She feels like a lid has been opened in her heart and all the passion is pouring out as she melts in Damon's arms.
So maybe this break up with Stefan isn't just what Katherine wanted. So maybe this is what she wanted. Maybe this is what she has been feeling all the time now, forcefully buried under the "Stefan" castle that she built inside her heart. A twisted blackmail was all it took to get them together. And now she doesn't even care if Katherine makes a move on Stefan or not.
So twisted.
A/N: hope you enjoyed this. Thanks for reading :) PLEASE send me a review! All comments and criticism are welcome :)
Edited: A few errors (pointed out by the lovely reviewers) fixed :)