Couples, a csi: new york fanfic

Title: Couples

Author: Marianne H. Stillie

Categories: Romance, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Episode Tag for "Rush to Judgment"

Rating: T

Pairing: Danny & Lindsay; Don & Jess

Season: Season 5

Summary: In the aftermath of two tragic deaths, two couples deal with their personal feelings.

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters and places for CSI: NY are the property of Jerry Bruckheimer Television, Alliance Atlantis and CBS Paramount Television. This piece of fan fiction was created for entertainment, not monetary purposes and no infringement on copyrights or trademarks are intended. Previously unrecognized characters, places and this story are copyrighted to the author. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author.

Archive: Please do not archive anywhere without the author's permission.

Couples

Danny & Lindsay

Danny's eyes hadn't left the front doors of Hillridge High School since Lindsay walked into the building. The bitter cold air this January night went right through him, promising the next snowstorm that had been predicted. He knew he should wait inside the cab that was at the curb, but right now he needed the sharp, biting chill to keep him alert and thinking clearly.

When the news came over from the precinct house that morning about the Fleming kid's death and Flack's involvement, it had hit him hard. His best friend was where he'd been a year ago. In seconds, all the bad memories from Ruben Sandoval's accidental death came flooding back.

He'd wanted to rush over there to show his support for Don. Instead he'd stayed at the lab doing his job as a CSI to help find Vince Nelson's killer. He was glad that Stella had offered to represent them. They were all very aware that they would have to depend on Sid's years of experience to find the kid's COD that would clear his friend's name and reputation.

The knot in the pit of his stomach tightened telling him how close he was to obsessing over the similarities between Don's situation and the hell of guilt he'd gone through over Ruben. Using the fresh calm and focus he'd discovered in himself since he'd learned he was going to be a father, Danny pushed the still painful memories into the past where they belonged. That time in his life when he'd literally gone off the deep end emotionally had almost cost him Lindsay. His responsibility to and love for her and their child came first now.

Lindsay's overly emotional reaction to the coach's death had him deeply concerned. When she'd talked about her first interview with the man's distraught wife two days ago, he could see she had begun to personalize the woman's loss. His tough Montana girl was slipping into that deeply caring part of herself that had taken so many cases to heart over the years.

Since that day in the Brooklyn warehouse almost two years ago, he'd always known how intensely she worried about him. She hid it behind a thick professional façade, but it eventually slipped through in the tone of her sweet voice or a look from her warm brown eyes. He couldn't tell her not to worry. His sometimes erratic recklessness and hot temper had gotten him in bad situations on a regular basis over the years. He was gradually getting the worst of his old bad habits under control. Trouble was, the risks came with the job he cared so much about. Lindsay knew it, and it was scaring the hell out of her as each day of her pregnancy went by.

When one of the glass doors started to open, Danny was up the flights of stairs in seconds. As Lindsay cleared the doorway, his arm went around her waist while his other hand firmly took hold of her elbow. Carefully, he led her down the stairs to the waiting taxi. He couldn't help noticing how heavily she leaned against him.

Out of the cold, he pulled her into his arms, needing her warmth as much as he wanted to give her his own. "That was a great thing you did for Amanda Nelson, Lins," he said softly against her hair.

"She needed the comfort, and the good memory. I hope someone would be that kind to me if…," and the slight tremble in her voice changed to a choked sob.

"Hey, I'm not goin' anywhere, Montana," he said gently. "I'm gonna be here to take care of you and that kid of ours for a very long time. In fact, I'm lookin' forward to you gettin' so sick of my bad jokes and my snoring after a cupla decades, you'll want a divorce."

Sniffling back her tears, Lindsay burrowed deeper into his jacket. "Never, Messer!" After a few minutes of silence, she asked, "Do you think we'll be good parents, Danny?"

In the weeks since Lindsay had told him about their baby, Danny had spent more and more time reviewing his childhood. The more he recalled the good and the bad, the more he'd come to realize there were no easy answers to raising a child. His voice became deep and throaty the way it always did when his emotions were very close to the surface, "If we have a son, I swear to God I'll make sure he doesn't get mixed up with the hoods like Louie did."

Moving away from his shoulder, Lindsay looked into his eyes. "If we have a son, he's going to grow up to be a very good man like his dad. We'll make sure of it, cowboy." Her hand pulled his head down and she kissed him sweetly on the mouth. "Would you stay with me tonight, Danny?"

Laughing tenderly, Danny answered, "Ya know, we really need to move in together, or get married, Lins."

Chuckling, Lindsay said, "Just a few more baby steps and we'll be there. Okay?"

Snuggled together again in the back seat of the taxi, Danny reluctantly whispered, "Okay."

Don & Jess

Clutching the oversized mug of hot chocolate between her icy hands, Jess shivered again. No amount of heat or layers of clothing had been able to counteract the bitter chill that had taken over her mind and body since her last conversation with Don at the precinct house only hours ago.

Absently, she checked the clock on the TV cable box. It was well past midnight. She'd been sitting in that one spot, curled up at the end of her couch, for over an hour. The dinner she'd cooked and choked down was just a blur. In disgust, she threw aside the thick quilt that was wrapped around her lower body. After dumping the hot chocolate in the kitchen sink, she began another cycle of agitated pacing from room to room in her apartment. Her floor-length fleece robe got caught between her legs almost tripping her each time she changed direction.

It was lucky that she had the four-to-midnight shift the next day, so not being able to sleep now wouldn't harm her job performance. Her seething anger rose another notch as she recalled how hard she'd worked to get to the detective three level she was now. Her record was perfect, and she intended to keep it that way. At least it was until she'd let herself take too much interest in Detective Donald Flack, Jr.

The handsome, blue-eyed detective was a very hard man to resist. His gentlemanly shyness was no act. It was who he truly was. That and the cool self-possessed self-confidence he gave off both on and off the clock. Don knew who he was and what he wanted. She had been attracted to him for all those qualities. That he respected her, as a fellow detective and as a woman, had cinched her determination to get to know him better over the last two years.

His self-absorbed reaction to her concern about their growing relationship being publicly known had seriously damaged that respect. And it had hurt like hell! The death of the Fleming boy and the IA rep's unfounded accusations against him had brought out a side of him she had no idea existed. Behind all his good qualities there was a cold, self-contained core that concealed someone other than the person she thought he was.

She was grateful that the two of them were on different shifts for the next few days. After the callous conversation they'd had, she couldn't deal with seeing him. Talking to him as if nothing was wrong and possibly working on a case with him would be brutal punishments she didn't need right now. That night on the Brooklyn street when he'd kissed her had started something that never should have happened. What quickly came after in the few weeks since was an even worse mistake. She needed to decide what to do about it.

Jess' anger peaked and began to recede. In its place she felt the compulsion to have a good cry. Before she could use her seasoned, professional self-control, the tears took over, bringing with them a crushing pain of impending loss.

How she envied her CSI friend Lindsay. The very pregnant woman from Montana would be able to continue working at the crime lab with her soon-to-be husband. The rules for detectives were stricter and had a deeper purpose and weight. The clash of wills she and Don had today made it very clear why they existed. Maybe it would be for the best if they ended it now.

Her choking sobs were suddenly interrupted by the apartment buzzer. As she crossed the room to her front door, she wiped her face of the rivulets of moisture. When she saw who was on the other side through the peephole, her emotions slipped back to anger and she slapped her palms against the door.

She knew she should tell Don to leave, but she opened the door anyway. Taking several steps back as he walked in, she said, "It's late, Don. Why did you come here?"

"I thought you'd want to know I've been cleared of the kid's death. He od'ed on prescription meds."

Jess noted how concise his statement was, as if he was reading from his case notebook. "Congratulations," was all she could say as she continued glaring at him. A familiar flush began rising in his cheeks so she wasn't surprised at his next words.

'I also want to apologize, Jess. I was so wrapped up in myself, I brushed off your concerns about us."

The mix of sincerity in his voice and the hurt expression on his face started to chip away at her fresh anger. She also noticed that he was a little unsteady on his feet, rocking from side to side. It was then she took note of the smell of alcohol that surrounded him.

In as non-accusatory voice as she could manage, she said, "Been out partying to celebrate?"

He grinned self-consciously. "Just a couple of beers at that new sports bar on Lafayette. Mac invited me to watch a Ranger game with him."

"Uh, huh." When Don didn't respond, she said, "Why don't I make a pot of coffee?"

With a small smile, he answered, "That would be great."

Twenty minutes later, they were on Jess' couch, she pouring the fresh, hot coffee into a mug, and Don cautiously taking it from her hands.

After two quick gulps, Don put the mug on the coffee table and looked directly at her. "I meant the apology, Jess. I know how insulting those IA guys can get when they smell fresh blood to harass. I'm not crazy about prying eyes feeding the gossip mill in our squad room. But people talk, and there's not much we can do about it."

In an unguarded moment, Jess said, "Look, Don, I understand how important being a good cop with a perfect record is to you. I feel the same about my reputation. Ever since that night you kissed me…"

"We've been playing with fire," he said softly. There was a pained pause that came out in his next words, "I'll understand if you want to end it, Jess."

Jess laughed harshly. "Now I know how Lindsay felt last year when Danny pushed her away."

Don quickly jumped in, "It's not the same. There's no other woman."

"I wish there was. I could fight that. What I can't fight is this," and she reached over and firmly pulled his badge from his belt. "Yours and mine," she added holding the leather- backed piece of metal up to him.

The common sense professional took over again and Don suggested, "Maybe we need to take a break. Just to divert the gossip for a little while. Let things cool down."

"Starting when?" she asked tensely.

"Tomorrow?"

Her answering nod was slow and very deliberate. Seeing his whole body relax at her calm agreement, she asked in a lighter tone of voice, "How long is this break going to last?"

With a relieved breath that slipped into a warm smile, he answered, "Why don't we just take it one day at a time."

Answering his smile with one of her own, she said in her coolest professional voice, "If you want to keep that perfect record of yours, you really shouldn't be driving anymore tonight."

Don laughed. "I like tempting fate once in awhile."

"Dating me and a DUI arrest are two very different things, Detective."

His smile evolved into his most charming Flack grin. "Mind if I borrow your couch for the night?"

"Uh uh," and she took his hand. Pulling harder when he hesitated getting up, she smiled seductively. "It's not tomorrow yet."

The distance to her bedroom with Don tightly beside her was a lot shorter than the distance they would have to travel to reconcile their personal and professional lives. She was sure there were going to be other problems and other arguments, but what they had together was worth all the bumps in the road.