He's been acting strange for weeks and she absolutely hates it. He'll promise to be at her house at six, but doesn't show until eight. Their nights are cut unusually short; he's leaving by midnight saying he has to get up early the next morning. On a normal school night she would completely understand, but its summer. Where the hell could he possibly have to be the next morning expect in his bed?
About half way through July she's really starting to get pissed. It's gone from being late for their dates to forgetting them completely. That's when she starts to think the worst. Noah is cheating on her; it's the only feasible explanation for his complete lack of concern about their relationship. She doesn't know whether to scream or cry. She was in love with this boy and now he's breaking her heart, just like everyone else.
Rachel tries to think of ways to confront him. She knows it's not going to be easy. He's going to get defensive, and then she'll yell at him, causing him to yell at her and then it's going to blow up in their faces. She doesn't want to imagine him not being there in her life, the thought actually sickens her. It's not that she's become utterly dependent on him, she hasn't. He's just given her a new reason to get up in the morning and smile because she knows someone out there that doesn't really have to, but certainly wants to, love her. Losing that scares her.
Noah is sneaking through her window; four hours after he was suppose to come over. She's still awake, though she's pretending to be asleep, as he loses his balance and falls on the floor. She has to stop herself from laughing. It serves him right, karma is a mean bitch.
"Rachel?" He whispers as he kicks off his shoes and climbs under the covers with her.
She continues to pretend she's asleep, not really in the mood to have this fight that's burning inside of her to come out. Her fathers are home and asleep in their room just down the hall. If they hear yelling they're going to wake up and knowing them, throw him out. They're still not entirely comfortable that their perfect daughter is dating the town's former man whore.
Noah leans down and kisses her lightly on her neck, in that spot that always makes her eyes roll into the back of her head. She hates that he has that kind of power over her, even now when she would rather castrate him then have him touch her.
"I'm sorry I'm so late." He whispers again. He knows she's awake. She claims to be an amazing actress, but after being with her for so long he can tell when she's putting on a show. And he's especially good at telling whether or not she's asleep.
"Go home, Noah. If you stay here all I'm going to want to do is fight with you." She says trying to pull her body away from his. He stops her by wrapping his arm around her waist.
He knows she has every right to be pissed. Actually, he's surprised she hasn't called him out on it yet. Though he's pretty sure he would have just fed her a lie if she ever brought it up before now.
"I can explain," He starts out gently, knowing with the wrong words Rachel would fly into a crazy frenzy. He's had a long day and anything to avoid her almost killing him or taking away his ability to bear children is what he's going for.
"Please just tell me who she is. Then leave so I can figure out a way to pick of the pieces of my heart your about to shatter," Rachel says flatly.
He can't help but laugh. This girl, his girl, thinks he's cheating on her. Has she looked in the mirror lately? There's nothing, not a girl in the world, that could pull him away from her. Ok maybe one girl, but not that way. The girl that's been occupying most of his time is his other girl, the woman that helped raise him when his bastard of a father just up and left one day. She had taught him how to cook and clean, get his sister ready for school each morning and bed each night. It's also the girl that's slowly forgetting who he is, and its breaking his heart.
"I'm not cheating on you, Rachel." He tells her a little more roughly then he should. "I would never cheat on you. You should know that."
She rolls her eyes at his words as she rolls over on her side to face him. Suddenly she regrets ever saying anything. She can see the sincerity of his words still in his eyes. And now she feels terrible.
"Then what are you doing, Noah? Why do you keep ditching me? Forgetting about things that you really shouldn't be forgetting about? Never asking me to come over to your house anymore because you insist we come over here instead. It's been one lame excuse after the other. Just tell me the truth." Her voice is a bit more forceful, but you can't really blame her. She's had enough of everything. She deserves the truth.
Noah gets up from her bed and slips back into his shoes. "Get dressed. I'll show you."
The drive to his house is silent. Rachel can't stop thinking about what his truth really is. She hasn't been over his house in two months, and never really considered that something might actually be wrong. She's feeling even worse than she had before.
"You have to be really quiet, alright?" He's not really asking her so much as telling her. One loud noise and he won't be sleeping for the rest of the night.
Rachel silently shakes her head as she takes Noah's hand in hers and follows him into the house. She thinks they're heading up to his room, but instead of turning left to head up the stairs, Noah pulls her in the direction of the back of the house, towards where his mother's bedroom is. The whole house is dark, making her a tad uneasy. It's not like she hadn't been in his house in the middle of the night before, but something about it feels different now.
When they reach his mother's bedroom door and stop Rachel gives him a questionable look. Not fully understanding why they're in front of his mother's room. He bends down and whispers into her ear that his mother is now sleeping in the guest bedroom upstairs and that this isn't her room anymore.
Noah reaches for the door knob and as quietly as he can opens the door to the bedroom. Rachel lets her eyes adjust to the surroundings before they settle on the small sleeping figure on the bed. It's an older woman. She's curled up into a fetal position, her head facing them. Rachel can tell who she is instantly from the nose on her face.
She looks up at him, waiting for an explanation, when he's ready of course. Rachel knows Noah is more of the type to run from a problem when there are feelings involved rather than face them head on.
He closes the door slowly, trying to make as little noise as possible. Then he grabs Rachel's hand and leads her to the living at the front of the house and sits her down on the couch. It's about time for an explanation and he can feel his palms getting sweaty.
Sitting down next to her he begins to tell her everything that's been keeping him away for the last few months. "It was just little things at first and no one really said anything but we thought it was nothing. Then one day she called hear looking for my Pop, that's when my mom started to get worried." Rachel shook her head as he spoke, knowing that his grandfather had passed away long before Noah was even born. "So my mom moved her in here in May and we've been taking care of her. That's why my mom has been working nights. She could be here during the day when Sarah and I were at school and then when we were here with her at night. When school got out my mom started going back to working all these weird hours so I never really had the time to go anywhere unless I was sure my mom was going to be home."
He stopped and looked away from Rachel, towards the darkness of the hallway that lead to her room. "For the first few weeks she knew who we were, but then she even started forgetting that. She started calling Sarah by my mom's name and she started getting scared so she's never here anymore either. And then she started calling me Rich. She spent most of last week yelling at me and telling me I was worthless and that I abandoned my family for my music. I can't even play my guitar anymore because she'll start yelling at me and crying."
Rachel could feel her heart breaking, regretting ever being so selfish about Noah leaving her or always being late. Tears started falling down from her eyes, she was trying to take his pain and turn into her own so he didn't have to feel it anymore.
"I'm so sorry, Noah." She squeaked out. And she was, for ever yelling at him for everything he's been doing the past two months, for making him feel horrible about everything.
"Nah, don't worry about it. You didn't know. I didn't want you to know because I didn't want to bother you with it all. It's some heavy shit, Rachel. She's losing her mind."
Rachel climbed up into his lap, placing a light kiss on his lips before settling into his arms. "It's what I'm here for, dummy. We're supposed to be able to be able to talk about things like this. I can help you, you know."
She could feel him shake his head against hers as he buried his face into her hair. Rachel swore she felt a tear fall down onto her shoulder but she let it go. Now was really not the time to point out that he was crying. Noah moved her off of him to lay the couch, pulling her back into his arms so that she was lying next to him. They fell asleep like that, holding to each.
The next day for his Nana is a good one. She actually remembers who he is and doesn't continuously call him by his father's name. Noah swear it's because she woke up to Rachel singing as she made everyone breakfast in his kitchen. He even gets a hit on the head for not introducing her to his beautifully talented girlfriend sooner.