Further fruit of my procrastination.

"Boo-yah! Ha-ha, yeah! That was a terrific battle!"

"Flo!" My Floatzel revealed his needle-sharp teeth in a wide grin.

"But-but…" On the other side of the watery field, my opponent dropped to his knees and hung his head. "Tentacruel, return." The unconscious pokemon transformed into red light, which then streamed into the pokeball held by its trainer.

"Don't feel bad!" The Gym's tile walls reverberated my booming voice marvelously. "The point of a battle is to enjoy it, which I dare say we accomplished! Is that not right?"

The boy climbed to his feet. "I guess…Yeah, it was pretty fun." His eyes met mine and he returned my beaming smile with one of his own. "Thanks for the honor, Crasher Wake." He saluted. "I will be back when I'm stronger. See you!"

The door clicked shut. Once again, the only sound in my Gym was that of water lapping against the pool edge. Frowning, I crossed my arms.

"Shame that battle didn't last longer. Kid was the first challenger to come here in a while."

"Tzel! Floatzel!"

"You're right." I nodded sagely. "I can't go easy on them for the sake of my own amusement. But I can—" my fist pumped the air, "—divert myself by swimming five hundred laps in two hours! Ah-ha!" I dashed ten feet away and jogged in place. "Get ready, Floatzel, buddy, for a tidal wave! Crasher Waaaaake!"

Sploosh!

I thrashed the water with my hands and pummeled it with my feet like it was a foe to be conquered. "One!" I zipped around the corners. "Two!"

"Flo!" Floatzel surfaced in front of me.

"What is it, Floatzel?" I stopped, profusely annoyed. A timid cough directed my eyes up. A pink head had poked itself through my door.

"Hello," said the mouth attached to the pink head. "You're Crasher Wake, right?"

The day's prospects brightened considerably. It had been much too long since two trainers challenged me in one day. "Yes indeed! You have the honor of standing in the presence of the magnificent wrestler, superb Gym Leader, the glorious, unmatched, Crasher Wake!"

The rest of the girl's body followed the head in. Although she was skinny and, well, rather all-about puny, I had learned from experience never to judge a trainer by their outside appearance. "Oh, I'm glad. I've been looking for you."

No doubt she had heard about my spectacular prowess in battle and come to put the rumors to the test. I pulled myself out of the pool. "Then I am glad you found me. And your name is…?"

"Maylene, from Veilstone City. I came here to challenge you," she brandished a finger in my direction, "to an arm wrestling match!"

Plip. Plip.

The water dripped off me and began to form a puddle by my feet. I stared at the confident finger, then at the arm attached to the finger, then at the owner of the arm attached to the finger. I repeated the process several times, wondering if there was something I was missing. Like, well, more of her. As it was, three of her arms would barely equal one of mine, and I was fairly certain that my hand alone would stretch nearly the length of her forearm.

"An arm wrestling match?" I repeated slowly. Perhaps I had water in my ears.

"Uh-huh." She lowered her arm. "I've seen your wrestling matches on TV and you've never lost. I wanted to see if you were just as good at arm wrestling."

I released a deep belly laugh. "Guhahaha! You have guts, girl, to challenge me to something like that! Very well. I accept your challenge!"

After scouring the Gym for the supply closet key before realizing my chief referee had left it in the lock, I brought out a card table and two chairs.

"Here we are!" I snapped open the chair and slammed it to the ground. "Ready for our match, little missy?"

She stopped petting Floatzel and hopped to her feet. "Yep."

"Floatzel, you're referee."

My old buddy let out a grumble as he hauled himself to his feet and padded over to us. "Flo. Floatzel."

"Quit it. Just say something if you see one of our elbows leave the table."

Maylene took the chair opposite me and we clasped hands. Sure enough, mine encompassed nearly half her forearm as well. I determined to go slightly easy so I didn't accidentally break her wrist.

"Ready?" she asked.

I nodded. "Floatzel, give the signal."

"Flrgg..."

"Floatzel!"

"Flo, flo." It shook its head and raised a paw. "Floatzel!"

My muscles tensed, but somewhere between her side of the table and my hand, I encountered unexpected resistance.

"You're pretty good." The puny girl, who apparently possessed more muscle than I had first believed, grinned at me.

Bang!

The back of my hand struck the table and I stared at her in surprise. "But please don't go easy on me. May we go again?"

My face twisted into a wide smile. "It appears I underestimated you. Yes, let's."

This time when we clasped hands and Floatzel gave the signal, I did not hold back. I strained with all my might, but her power was an indomitable force. Inch by inch, she forced my hand nearer the table. This time when the two touched, it was merely a whisper.

"That was fun." Her red eyes sparkled. "One more time? I'm sure you must have lots of work to do."

"No, no, I'm good. It's a weekend, my referee is bingeing on Fireflygon at home. We have time for a couple more rounds." I cracked my knuckles.

"I'd be glad to. Mind if we do left hand, though? My right's a bit tired."

"No problem." Since most people were right dominant, perhaps my awesome ambidextrous self would have a slight advantage in this next round. Not that I cared or anything. The point of competition was to have fun and I was enjoying this immensely. However, if I were to be totally honest, it was slightly vexing that a diminutive vixen like this girl had twice gotten the better of me.

We switched sides and Floatzel yawned. He raised a paw. "Flo!"

I lost. The fourth round I lost too. In the fifth round, I attempted to get my entire body weight behind my attack, but that failed as well. The sixth round lasted nearly four minutes, but in a bout of enthusiasm I accidentally let my elbow off the table and disqualified myself. By the time we passed round thirty-seven, she was beating me within five seconds.

"Whew." She shook out her right arm. "Sorry, but I have to stop now. What was that, round forty-four?"

"Fifty-four," I corrected and set my elbow on the table. It felt like an overcooked ramen noodle, but I wasn't going to let that stop me. Besides, I had swum between Hoenn's Lilycove and Sootopolis in a mere thirteen hours. How could a few rounds of arm wrestling be so exhausting? "One more time."

"Fine." We clasped hands. "Ready, set…" Sometime between round twenty-nine and thirty-two, we had lost our referee to the lures of naptime. "Go!"

Bang!

Tingles ran up my arm as she once again slammed my hand to the tabletop (there was now a permanent dent in the metal).

"Well, that's it." Maylene hopped to her feet. Her gaze landed on the wall clock I kept above the door. "Sorry, but I have to get back to Veilstone. Thanks a bunch for accepting my challenge, though."

"My pleasure." I got to my feet. "Sometime we will have to have a rematch."

Smiling, she nodded, pink hair bobbing. "See ya!"

After she left, I tried folding up the chairs to put away, but only succeeded in dropping one on Floatzel's tail.

"Flo!" He was up, teeth bared, in a blink.

"Sorry, Flo," I muttered. I bent down for the chair, but my noodle arms were too weak to lift it. So, instead, I sunk to the floor next to my pokemon. "I'm not saying I didn't have fun or anything, but…" I released a sigh. "Geez. Am I losing my touch or something?"

Sensing my mood, Floatzel switched from awakened snoozer to caring partner and nuzzled my limp hand with his nose.

"Maybe…" The reluctant thought could hardly crawl out of my mouth. "Maybe I'm getting old." I chuckled drily. "It's about time, you know."

"Flo?" Floatzel raised his head. I stared at the tiles lining my Gym walls.

"Perhaps it's better to find out this way. I can retire while I'm at the top of my game instead of in the middle of a downward slope. People will remember me as the Undefeated Crasher Wake and not the old guy who tried to hang on too long."

"Floatzel!" My pokemon sat up fully and shook his whole body. He proceeded to poke me incessantly with his nose. "Flo! Floatzel!"

I blinked. "You really think so?"

"Tze-tzel!"

I frowned. "But if it's not that, then why did I lose fifty-five rounds of arm wrestling?"

"Flo. Tzel-flo,floatz."

"You don't know, but you know someone who does? Who?"

"Floatzel!"

I leapt to my feet, punching the air with both hands. "THAT'S BRILLIANT! WHY DIDN'T I THINK OF THAT BEFORE?"

A few minutes later I was in the Gym's back room, dialing a number I knew by heart.

"Hello?" My old friend appeared on the screen. "Crasher Wake," he greeted. "To what do I owe this pleasure?"

I cast a quick glance around the Gym, just to make sure it was empty. "Bruno, I need your advice."

…

The small jet landed on the runway and a large man stepped out. Considering that it was a mere three hours since my call, he must have hardly bothered to pack.

"We could have talked over the video-phone," I pointed out, although I couldn't say that I was displeased he had flown out here.

"Nonsense." Bruno gave me a hearty slap on the back. "Being a member of the Kanto Elite Four has its perks, and I've wanted to have a chance to fly the private jet around. Although Lorelei wasn't too happy. Apparently she had a shopping trip planned with Karen in Goldenrod." He shrugged. "Oh well. Anyway, tell me about this girl." We strode across the tarmac.

"For starters, she's puny. I thought if I could put my body weight behind it then—"

"What's her name?"

"Ah, name. Miss Maple I believe. Or…it might've been Melissa. Meredith maybe?"

"How do you expect to find her in order to have a rematch if you can't remember her name?"

"She's from Veilstone, so I figured—Maylene!" I snapped my fingers. "Ah-ha! What did I tell you? The magnificent Crasher Wake never forgets a name." I frowned and scratched my head. "Why do I feel like I've heard it before?"

"Perhaps she was a previous challenger?" he suggested. "Anyway, brief me on what happened."

The Elite Four member offered to drive while I talked. I went over everything in minute detail, from the way we were sitting to the particular arrangement of our fingers. I knew that even the slightest lapse could make the difference between advice that could help me win, and advice that was utterly useless.

We had driven for an hour before I realized that we were still driving. I looked in the mirror and saw Pastoria City behind us. "Bruno, I think you may have taken a wrong turn."

"No I didn't," he replied cheerfully. "We are on our way to Mount Coronet for some training."

"Training?" I could feel my blood heat up at the prospect. "MAGNIFICENT! What kind of training?"

"The mountain kind," Bruno responded. "Although I need some time to think before I come up with the appropriate regimen. Does Mount Coronet have a waterfall? I find that sitting under a waterfall helps clear my neural pathways."

…

For the next seven and three-quarters days, the brilliant Bruno trained me in all arts arm wrestling related: lifting boulders, swimming up waterfalls, swatting Zubat, swimming down waterfalls, climbing sheer cliffs, and (his favorite) meditating under waterfalls. In addition, he taught me multiple techniques, including the rarely seen 'Granite Arm' shown to him by none other than the legendary Brawn Brown himself. We were in the last quarter of the eighth day and I was in the middle of my final test (an arm wrestling match against Bruno; I was supposed to use the Granite Arm technique to withstand his might for three hours) when music interrupted our grunting.

"It's the eye of the tiger—"

"Sorry about that." Without allowing his grip to falter once, Bruno answered his cell-phone using his other hand. "Hello?"

There's cell reception out here? My hand inched backwards. I gritted my teeth and held firm, tightening my muscles in the specific way Bruno taught me.

"What? Darn! I totally forgot. Listen, could you—? Really? You're a lifesaver, Lorelei." He winced. "Yeah, I know. Sorry about taking the plane without asking. Thanks for calling. I'll be there as soon as possible. Yeah. Bye." He hung up and returned his attention to our match. He nodded approvingly. "I think you have mastered it."

We let go and I massaged my fingers in an attempt to uncurl them. "You truly believe that I have reached my limit?"

"No one ever reaches their limit, Crasher Wake," Bruno replied, standing. "We could train here for millennia and still have much to learn. However, the duty of being an Elite Four member calls to me and I must return to Kanto." He sheepishly scratched the back of his neck. "Agatha's birthday is tomorrow and I have to make it back in time for the party. Luckily Lorelei bought my present, otherwise I'd be ghosted."

"I understand." I punched my palm and bowed. "Thank you for everything, Master-Sensei-Sifu Bruno. Tomorrow, while you celebrate the birthday of your fellow Elite Four member, I will challenge Maylene to a rematch."

…

There are some things that are easier to do than say. There are some things that are easier to say than do. Then there are those things where you shouldn't have bothered saying them in the first place because the task is so utterly hopeless that you never stood a chance.

At first I believed my goal to find a specific girl in the city of Veilstone would fall into that second category, but when I stood in the center of town and realized just how big it was…well, that was tough odds for even me, the unbeatable Crasher Wake.

"No problem." I punched my palm and then raised my hands in the air to stoke my energy. "I'll just ask everyone in town!" I walked up to the first person I saw. "Excuse me, ma'am, I'm looking for a girl named Maylene."

"Of course." She didn't look perturbed in the least at my random approach (it must have been my dazzling aura). "You'll find her down that street and to the left. Good luck."

I stared after her in surprise, then shook my head. Obviously she recognized me from TV and sensed I was headed to a match of the upmost importance. With a wide grin, I followed her directions.

A few minutes later I was staring up at the city's Gym, wondering if she had misheard my question. "I asked for Maylene, not a pokemon Gym," I muttered and glanced around. I considered stopping in to say hi to the recently installed Fighting-Type Gym Leader, who I had yet to meet, but I was super stoked for my arm wrestling match. I'd do it after. "Let's try this again."

I walked back to the square and looked around. Spotting one of those diners that had outside tables, an idea came to mind. "Ah-ha!" I jogged over and climbed onto the makeshift stage. "MAYLENE!" I thundered. "IT'S CRASHER WAKE AND I'VE COME TO CHALLENGE YOU TO A REMATCH!"

"Hey, dude." A passing teenage kid looked up at me. "Don't make a fool of yourself. You can find her if you go down that street, turn onto second, and take the next two rights you see."

"Really?" I brightened and hopped off the table (good timing, since the owner of the diner had just emerged and didn't look happy). "Thanks, kid."

"And put on some clothes!"

Although his directions were more convoluted than the woman's, my destination remained the same. "Again?" I frowned at the Gym. A passing businessman caught my eye and I trotted up to him. "Excuse me, sir. I'm looking for a little girl, pink hair, goes by Maylene—"

"Then you came to the right place," the man said and pointed at the Gym. "Right in there."

"Really? I didn't realize she was a pokemon trainer." The man gave me a puzzled look but I had already started for the Gym. "Thank you!" I guess this meant I'd get to say hello to the new Gym Leader in addition to challenging Maylene.

I pulled open the double doors. "CRASHER WAKE IS IN THE HOUSE!"

Everyone stopped what they were doing and turned to me. The Gym was pretty much the same as it had been under the previous Gym Leader, with sparring mats and punching bags and blah, blah, all Fighting-Type-y-ish. (Not nearly as interesting as my Gym, if I do say so myself.)

"Crasher Wake!" The chirp directed my attention to a pink haired girl who had emerged behind a powerfully built woman. "Good to see you. Come here for a rematch?"

"You betcha!" I cracked my knuckled in anticipation.

"Who is this?" The large woman asked Maylene.

"Oh, sorry. This is Crasher Wake; Wake, this is Pamela."

"Nice to meet you." I shook her hand. It was nearly as big as mine. "You must be the new Gym Leader, eh? I meant to come meet you sooner, but I'm afraid time got away from me."

For a second, shock registered on Pamela's face, but then she started guffawing. "Me? The Gym Leader?"

"Um." I looked around. Now that she mentioned it, there were several other likely candidates in the building: a mountain of a man who rivaled Bruno for height, a stocky fellow who looked like he could wrestle a rampaging Tauros to the ground, a leather-clothed biker with muscles on top of muscles. I turned to Maylene for help, but she was doubled over laughing.

"Sorry, I'm sorry," she gasped, wiping tears off her face. "It's just—I never realized I forgot—it's all so new, you know?" She straightened and held out her hand. "Let me properly introduce myself. I am Maylene, Leader of Veilstone Gym."

"Ah." Realizing she was still holding out her hand, I shook myself out of my stupor and grasped it. "Now those directions make sense."

Maylene, still grinning, replied, "Sorry for the confusion. You ready for our rematch?"

"Pumped up and ready to go!" I bellowed. "Prepare to face defeat, fellow Gym Leader of mine! Our match will go down in history as the quickest ever defeat in arm-wrestling!"

The little vixen's smile turned sly. "I agree. But I'm not going to be the one losing."

Pamela and some other guy left and came back with a table and two chairs. Taking our seats, Maylene and I clasped hands. After all my training with Bruno in the mountain, I knew I couldn't lose. Maylene, on the other hand, couldn't afford to lose. Unlike last time, we had a crowd, and this crowd was composed mainly of fighters who trained under her. Defeat for her wouldn't just mean a loss of face, but perhaps the loss of those trainers' respect.

A flicker of doubt entered my mind. It was vital for new Gym Leaders to appear strong and retain the respect of Gym trainers. Not doing so could lead to discord and insolence down the road. Was it the right thing to try and defeat her?

She seemed to read my thoughts. "Just in case you've forgotten what happened last time we tried this, how about I have Pamela tell you the first rule to my Gym?"

The other woman didn't hesitate. "Don't disrespect your opponent by cheating, taunting, or going easy on him."

My mouth twisted into a smile. "If that's how you want it…"

Pamela sliced down her hand. "Begin!"

I could feel her hand tense at the same time my muscles tightened. I clenched my jaw and exerted every fiber in my body to drive her hand to the tabletop. Her lips thinned as she fought against me. Man! How could this be so hard? This was a girl I could pick up and throw thirty feet if I wanted to. It should've been easy to get her hand down, especially after going through Bruno's strict regimen.

I was deaf to the cheers around us as, inch by torturous inch, she forced my hand closer to the tabletop. But then I drew on every ounce of training from the last seven and three-quarters days and regained the lost ground (air?). I forced her hand back up to the starting point, then slowly down towards her side.

"You've been working out," she ground out between clenched teeth. I grunted in reply.

Come on, come on, I urged my trembling muscles. Her hand sunk still lower. It was less than three inches from the table now.

"Darn it," Maylene muttered. I let a grin sweep over my face as her hand dipped another half an inch. My superior strength and skill had finally earned me a rightful victory. All I had to do was…

Abruptly, and without letting her elbow leave the table, she twisted her body and yanked my arm forward. My hand hit the table with a smack!

"WHOOO!" The surrounding trainers cheered.

I took a deep breath. I let it out. I repeated and slowly a grin swept across my face. "MAGNIFICENT!" I stood up. "Brilliant! Though, if I may ask, how did you manage it?"

Maylene grinned. "Redirection. Instead of trying to push against your strength, I shifted around and pulled. It's a little technique used in Jeet Kune Do, Aikido, and some other martial arts. If it was a contest of pure strength, you'd've won."

"I dare say that it still would have been a challenge," I replied. I yanked out my chair, plopped down again, and leaned forward eagerly. "Want to go again?"