She wasn't clueless. She'd been down this road more times than she could count. She'd recover then just… not. She'd go off the deep end. She tried. When her brother died she tried, but it wasn't the same now.

Meredith Grey was hurting too. She understood that Meredith's way of coping was becoming cold – hell, Grey didn't fully know how to cope. Her version of making things better was holding it in until she snapped. And that's exactly what happened. She snapped.

The older girl sighed, feeling the high hit her. This was the fourth time this week she took something to take the edge off, taking pills to make things okay again. Owen knew something was up, but Amelia covered it up well. She always did.

Then there was Stephanie, the one who was all too observant. There's a reason she was succeeding so well on the surgical floor. She knew her stuff and she knew her way around patient care – even if that care involved catching lies.

"Are you okay, Dr. Shepherd?" she asked cautiously.

Amelia smiled and nodded but she was eerily calm. "I'm good, Edwards."

She didn't want to get involved. She'd seen her boss angry with her plenty of times before and she refused to start accusations. She didn't even know anything. Amelia wouldn't put her patients in jeopardy – she was the best neurosurgeon around. Besides, she wasn't the type to get drunk. Hell, the dark skinned girl never even saw Amelia take a drink. Ever.

After the surgery Amelia gathered her things. She had to go. She'd buy a bottle of wine to down in the hotel she was staying in. The only good thing about not living with Meredith was not having surveillance at home making sure she didn't touch anything addictive.

Too many people died though. So many people she loved died. Her father, her brother, her friend… She'd always be attached and then they'd just… they died.

"Hey," a voice piped up behind her. "You okay? You've seemed distant lately."

She didn't have time for the red head right now. She wanted to scream that something was not okay, nothing was okay, but if she got close he'd probably die too. It was a pattern.

"I'm good, Owen," she turned around with a smile.

"I know things have been rough to you and I haven't been open-"

"So be open," she challenged.

He looked at her with apologetic eyes and in return she rolled her eyes, pushing past him. "I'll see you tomorrow, Hunt."

He put out an arm, his version of begging her to stay. "Please."

"I need to go," she said gently. She walked out of the room without looking back. She knew if she did she'd only see a hurt man who was trying to love her. She really didn't want to see that.

She felt in her coat pocket and had the edge of a bottle in it. At least one thing would go right. She went to the liquor store around the corner before driving back to the hotel. She pulled out her room key as she went through the hall. She walked in the door but before she could shut it and take pills and drink a hand pushed the door open.

"Seriously?" she asked. She peered around the door and a fire lit in her eyes when she saw who had the audacity to follow her. "Seriously?"

"I made a promise to Cristina," she started matter of fact. "This is me making a promise to you. You're in Seattle, you're the closest thing to a sister other than Maggie. Lexie's gone, Cristina's gone… You're the one I have to look out for. I may not like you but I love you. You're my sister."

"I don't want to hear it. You made it clear-"

"You're relapsing," Meredith cut to the chase. "Owen doesn't know and no one else knows, but I know. You're falling hard."

"God, Meredith-"

"You wanted loyalty, this is me being loyal," she pushed, still showing very little compassion. "Do I have to go to the chief or are you going to let me in?"

She hated the ultimatum but knew better than to take a chance on whether or not Meredith was shooting out a bluff. She rarely made a threat and didn't follow through.

"You've been high," she crossed her arms.

Amelia reciprocated the action, crossing her own. "I have not been high. I'm fine."

"I know you more than you want me to-"

"I'm fine," she repeated.

"You're-"

"Fine," she finished the sentence.

It was quiet awhile but eventually Meredith sat down on the bed, letting Amelia tower over her.

"Then why did you let me in?" she said, the first time her voice becoming soft and human.

Amelia rolled her eyes, walking across the room and flipping the TV on. She would a part of this. Yes, she was slipping. Yes, she would continue to slip. Yes, she would keep it together this time. It was just temporary, just until things got better.

"Give me the drugs."

"I don't know what you're talking about," she kept her front.

"Amelia-"

"Meredith!" she snapped. "Why won't you ever just trust me?"

"When I first met you Derek didn't trust you due to drugs," she pointed out. "I want to trust you so badly but I can't when you're clearly lying to my face. Please, don't make me do what I don't want to do."

"No one is forcing you to be a tattletale, Grey!"

Meredith pushed her down on the bed before talking down to her, switching their roles. Amelia was confident and forceful and spoke with fiery, but she wasn't going to fall for it. These past couple years she fell for Amelia's tactics of pushing people away too easily.

"Amelia," she repeated calmly.

The dark haired girl sighed, letting down her guard.

"Fine," she dug in her pocket, pulling out a small baggy of pills. "Here. Here."

Meredith sighed, smiling wide. She thought she was the hero, like always. Meredith to the rescue.

"And the wine?"

She handed it over, sneering, "Don't follow me again or I'll kill you."

"Someone has to look out for you," Meredith shrugged.

"I'm only giving them to you because I know you'll go to the chief," she set the record straight. "I'm not losing my job to drugs again."

"Crystal clear," Meredith smiled. "Do you want me to stick around?"

She quickly shook her head, "You can get the hell out now."

With a chuckle Meredith nodded. "I'm on my way."

The second the door closed Amelia dug in her purse, pulling out the rest of the bottle. Meredith was going to her car while Amelia sat in the room, downing a pill without the booze she wanted. Meredith had a good idea of what she was doing though. She didn't have it in her to keep fighting, but she knew.

Unbeknownst to Amelia, her once-sister-in-law was reaching her car. Once she was settled in she looked at her surroundings before she herself took a pill out of the bag and popped it in her mouth. She needed to feel better too.

They're fine.

Just a typical oneshot. Hope you liked it :)