Fire Emblem Radiant Dawn: What Really Happened

by how regretful

This is my first story and it's based around the Fire Emblem 10 game. The story starts when Micaiah meets Ilyana and Aimee in the prison. This is just a retelling of the story but with an unrealistic insight on the chars. It's supposed to be funny, enjoy!

1. Chapter 1

Fire Emblem Radiant Dawn: The Real Story

The jail cell was implausibly dirty and filled with the stench of death. Micaiah looked around for an opening in the cell, a way out of this nightmare. "By the Goddess, I think there's a dead girl in the corner of the room Micaiah," exclaimed Laura. Laura was a young priestess the Dawn Brigade had included into their group so she could obtain the medicine required for her sick abbot. Laura rushed over to the corner of the room and nudged the body with her boot, only to have the girl chomp down on her poor foot.

"Ouch! Let go you diseased rubbish!" The young maiden screamed frantically trying to kick the girl's head free of her foot, but to no avail. "Ilyana, let go this instant!" yelled a young woman covered in a nauseating pink dress drenched in feces or the like. The foot monster let go with a whimper and a grunt. "I'm terribly sorry about that, she is just hungry," spoke the flamingo embossed maiden. "My name is Aimee, what is yours?"

Laura was too busy kicking Ilyana's stomach to respond but Micaiah answered, "My name is Micaiah, and my body beating friend here is Laura." A silence came over the room excluding Ilyana gasping the occasional "oomph!" in between rib cracking punches. "You're bleeding old lady," said a young cloaked man in a small voice.

"I am NOT old thank you! Man, as soon as Sothe springs me from this joint I am SO going to buy some extra strength hair dye," muttered the silver haired girl. Truth be told, Micaiah was about forty five years old but for some reason she never aged past sixteen.

Micaiah looked down and saw no wound, only dry blood. Sacrifice did that; it would heal her wounds from time to time.

Micaiah was about to sacrifice Ilyana's wounds but Sothe unexpectedly fell from a hole in the roof. "Ouch, are you okay Mic… OH MY GODDESS! ILYANA'S DEAD!!!" Screamed the green haired youth whilst running in circles. Micaiah only smacked her forehead at Sothe and used Sacrifice on Ilyana so she could stand up again, since Laura had broken both her legs. "Laura, take it easy on her, it takes too much energy to heal her," mumbled Micaiah and she wearily stood up." Ilyana also stood up and greeted everyone as she teetered back and forth. "Oh, hello Sothe… It's nice to eat with you again. Let's get… out of this… hellhole…," mumbled Ilyana as she finished her helping of Laura's boot. "Thanks for asking and all, but my name is Kurth, prince of Goldoa," muttered the young cloaked figure. Everyone effectively ignored the youth and began to run outside where their comrades (and possibly lunch,) awaited them.

To be continued….