Sorry
It was hard to get a good afternoon's nap on the couch in the offices of Wright & Co. recently, and it was all down to that one regretful moment when Phoenix said, 'yes, Gumshoe, of course you can work here for a while.' Gumshoe was a terrible detective most of the time, annoying to an infinite degree, and could not seem to go anywhere without something getting knocked or broken; often himself.
Now, the attorney's dreams were full of heavy footsteps, out of tune singing and muttering… and the distinct sound of a bookcase clattering to the ground, taking every single book, and a hundred year old vase full of artificial flowers along with it.
When Phoenix opened his eyes and glanced across the room, he saw an empty space where the case had once been, and upon looking further down, he discovered it face down on the floor, with an arm sticking out of each side, one still holding the book the detective had been trying to get when disaster had struck. It was like a scene right out of a cartoon, except that this was real, and real people tended to injure themselves when bookcases fell on them.
"… I'll call an ambulance." It was becoming a regular occurance, and over the past few weeks, had been one of the few things the phone on his desk had been used for. He was practically on first name terms with the ambulance crew. He stretched a little, eyes scrunched closed as a yawn excaped his mouth, and then he climbed to his feet, trying to calm his always impressive bed (or couch) hair.
"No, uh, I think I'm okay," the man underneath the bookcase spoke unsurely, and then the whole structure moved to one side, revealing Gumshoe covered in books and with an unidentified species of blue fake flower in his mouth. "Actually, is this poisonous?" he asked in a slightly muffled and rather concerned voice.
Phoenix let out a loud sigh. "It isn't real," he told him, and reached his hand down to help him up.
"What? I've been watering those things for weeks." Now there was an unfortunate dark stain on his beige jeans. He pushed the books scattered over him, and slowly sat up, taking Phoenix's hand in his own and using it to pull himself to his feet. Aside from being a little ruffled, wet, and slightly red faced, he seemed to come out of the experience relatively unscathed.
For the moment, there were no words. The pair looked at each other, and then down at the now covered floor in front of them. The bookshelf was half resting on a huge scattered pile of law books that Phoenix had been collecting since he had been studying for his degree, and to the side of them were tiny pieces of a smashed antique vase and various plastic flowers. It was like one of the crime scenes Gumshoe was so used to investigating.
The detective's hands flew to his face. "I am so so sorry. I was just trying to get something and then suddenly I was on the floor covered in books and flowers."
"Like you suddenly broke my microwave trying to heat a tin of baked beans, and like you suddenly burned a pile of my case notes trying to light scented candles to relax me?"
"I'm sorry! I'll fix it, I promise. Just give me a few hours and it'll be like nothing ever happened," Gumshoe pleaded. His hands clasped together in front of him and his eyes were as wide as a puppy's. It was that same look that was the reason he was here in the first place.
"No." Phoenix was firm. "Just go out for a few hours and I'll sort it out." It was like living with a naughty child. A clumsy six foot three naughty child.
Since there seemed to be no point in begging, the pleading expression turned into a mournful one, and he pulled the brown coat that was a permanent attachment on him further over his shoulders, and his huge feet stomped through the office door. Phoenix winced. It was the sound from his nightmares.
It was six hours before the detective reappeared. He had sat in a coffee shop for an hour or so trying to figure out how he could make it up to his employer, and on his way out, had managed to arrest the perfectly innocent owner of a florist for stealing her own flowers. The only apology he had been able to offer her was to buy one of her biggest flower bouquets, and so he had headed back to Phoenix's office with what he figured was the perfect gift for an apology.
The man's back was facing him as he stepped into the office. Phoenix was hunched over with a tube of super glue and a piece of the broken vase in his hands, as he tried to fix it to another piece. Gumshoe was just about to open his mouth to launch into yet another 'I'm sorry' speech, when the attorney let out a huge sneeze, and as he did, one hand squeezed on the tube of glue, spreading it down his fingers, and the piece of vase flew into the air. He managed to catch it before it hit the ground, but then he realised he had made a huge mistake: it was now stuck firmly onto his fingers.
"Oh… I uh, I brought you some flowers," Gumshoe stuttered as the scene played out in front of him.
"I know, that's why I'm –" another sneeze. "Sneezing." Shaking his hand, without any luck, to try and get the piece of vase unstuck, he stood up straight and made a dash for the door to the other room; anything to get away from the flowers.
But Gumshoe, not seeming to take that hint, ran after him, flowers still in his hand. "I'm so sorry, I didn't know, I swear. Is that why you had the fake flowers? I'll make it up to you, I promise!" He was about to make his way into the other room with Phoenix, but the door slammed in his face, narrowly missing his nose.
More sneezing could be heard inside, and the sound of Phoenix frantically pulling tissue after tissue from a box. "No… no more making up, just keep the flowers away from me."
"I'll put them in a vase, over -" A realisation struck him suddenly. "Hey, can I have that piece of vase you have? I'll see if I can put it back together."
Gumshoe did end up making it up to Phoenix. He drove him to the hospital, because the attorney couldn't change gears with a huge piece of china stuck to his hand. They spent four hours waiting to be seen, and it took another hour for two nurses to get the piece of vase unstuck.
Once they had finally finished, Phoenix drove the detective home. Using Gumshoe's directions, they took a left when they should have taken a right and ended up driving round in circles for fourty five minutes before their car ran out of gas and they had to call for help.
Gumshoe gave him chocolates that time when he burnt his case notes, but ate half of them on the way back to the office, and when he blew up the microwave he found an adorable little bear holding a plaque saying 'sorry', but dropped it in a muddy puddle before he managed to give it to him.
Sometimes, Phoenix wondered if the gifts were an apology for doing such stupid things, or if the stupid things were an excuse for the gifts.
And his apology for getting them lost? A candlelit meal at a restaurant for the two of them, at which, he spilled his dinner down Phoenix's dark blue suit and then set it on fire with one of the candles. The attorney is still waiting for an apology for that one.