A/N: This story is dedicated to my newest fanfiction pal, Pyromania 101 for giving me this idea and for being a really cool person to talk to. Basically, this is just a short humor oriented one-shot starring Yugi and our favorite mischievous soul reaper, Rangiku Matsumuto!

Warnings: This story takes place in no particular time slot for the Bleach canon. I use the English names for the Yu-Gi-Oh characters, so that means Domino will be in America for this story. The time slot for this one-shot shall be sometime before everyone travels to Egypt before their final adventure with the mysterious spirit of the Millennium Puzzle. Also, it has been a long time since I've seen Bleach, so if I mess anything up when it comes to how the character's act, let me know. Thank you.

Disclaimer: I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh or Bleach. This was made for entertainment purposes only.

The Luckiest Boy Alive

Soul Society

7:39 a.m.

"Aaaaaaaaw, Captain!"

Toshiro Hitsuguya, captain of squad ten of the Gotei 13, stared agitatedly at his direct subordinate with cold teal eyes as he slapped down a stack of paperwork on her desk. "Rangiku, don't even try to complain about this assignment. "You're being punished for causing mischief around the Sereitei."

Rangiku Matsumoto sighed dejectedly, pouting her full lips in the process. "But Captain, all I did was drink a little Sake..."

"Then you followed Captain Kuchiki home, attempted to sneak up on him, tried to grope him in a way that's inappropriate even for you, and then you attacked him with your zanpakuto!"

"So..."

Toshiro shook his head in disgust. "Rangiku a little Sake for you means ten bottles worth...", a vein threatened to pop out of his head as he glared up at her, "...which you've hidden in my office for years on end!"

Rangiku's light blue eyes glowered down at him, making Toshiro wish he were taller just so he could have the height advantage in moments like this, but even with her height, Toshiro's glare held more weight, causing Rangiku to release a breath of exasperation.

"Fine, maybe I went a teeny bit overboard..."

"Overboard doesn't begin to cover it!" Toshiro interrupted, baring his teeth at her now. Rangiku shrugged in indifference as he ranted, her mind elsewhere by this point. Toshiro wasn't intimidating for her by any means, but the three-foot tall stack of paper was a different matter. She knew half of them were long apology letters to the captain of squad six, and the other half probably had to do with routine protocol check-ups on the lower ranked members of the squad. For hours on end she would have to evaluate and speculate how the members of her team were conducting themselves.

She moaned at the mere thought of it. "Come of Captain, do I really have to do all that? Can't I come on the mission with you? Won't you need my assistance?"

Toshiro scoffed, regaining his composure as he stalked toward the doorway with his zanpakuto, Hyorinmaru, strapped behind his shoulders. "I already told you that you're being punished for bringing shame to this squad. It's going to take years for me to salvage the burned remains of our reputation after this last stunt. You're lucky that the Head Captain didn't file for a job termination."

"But Captain..."

"That paperwork better be done by the time I get back!" Toshiro snarled, turning around long enough to glare daggers into his direct subordinate, ten veins just waiting to explode within his skull. At this rate, Rangiku's going the death of the young prodigy.

Rangiku pouted again, but nodded at his unrelenting order. "Fine."

With that, Toshiro once again regained his icy composure, stalking out of the room with the confidence of a man double his height.

As for the lieutenant, she conducted the slow and agonizing process of reaching toward the top of the mile high stack of paperwork.

"Man, this is going to take all day," she muttered, finally managing to grab the first sheet. Her eyes widened upon realizing that this was just the first page of the apology letter Toshiro had written on her behalf. Reaching to the top of the pile again, she grabbed two sheets this time, quickly skimmed the words, then reached for a couple more sheets of paper with words printed along the front.

Thirty-eight pages later, Rangiku finally read the last page, which was a message to her from her Captain.

Dear Lieutenant Matsumoto,

I want you to copy the typed manuscripts of the letter you just read by hand, sign it, and then repeat the process for every member of Squad 6 and Squad 10. And don't even think about going to the Squad 12 barracks to make copies. I made a deal with Captain Kurotsuchi to make sure you're kept from cheating out of your punishment. You will re-write each letter by hand, understand!? By hand!

Sincerely,
Squad Ten Captain, Toshiro Hitsuguya

P.S. You will hand deliver each of these letters, and then I want a full report on what you've learned from all this.

Rangiku's eyes were wide like saucers. "What the heck! He's got to be kidding with this! Certainly my behavior doesn't call for this madness!" With a loud wail Rangiku plopped down into the swivel chair and slammed her head against the desk. "What he's asking is cruel and unusual punishment!"

The poor woman knew she had to find a way out of this, some convoluted, complicated, over-the-top, Sake influenced way out of this mess.

And then, in the blink of an eye, came a stroke of genius.

With renewed vigor, Rangiku stormed out of the office, leaving the paperwork far behind.

"Ooooh Izuru!"

In the Living World

Town of Domino

7:11 a.m.

"Uh, oh, this isn't Karukura town..."

Rangiku found herself moderately confused as she transformed into her living world from. She wore a teal, short-sleeved shirt, buttoned up about halfway, shamelessly revealing a good chunk of cleavage, of course with her being the busty woman that she was, that happened with almost every top she wore. On the bottom half of her body she wore white Capri pants and teal wedge heels she'd bought on her last trip to the living world. On top of her head of long strawberry blond hair she wore a white sun-hat that matched the translucent white ruffled cardigan she carried over her left arm. Yet another thing she'd bought from her last trip to the living world.

Unfortunately, she wasn't in the right place.

"Man, Izuru was so worried about getting caught that he sent me to some other town," Rangiku mused, sighing a little. "Well, there's probably still some good shopping here." With that said the woman left the alleyway she was standing in, smiling broadly as the sun warmed her skin. "Aaah, now this is how you spend a day!"

Meanwhile, a few blocks away from where the mischievous soul reaper was walking, a young man with tri-colored, star-shaped hair was just leaving from the game shop he called home.

"I'll...see...you after school grandpa," Yugi Muto, the famous King of Games mumbled out, struggling to talk around the sandwich he'd just stuffed between his lips. Shoving his backpack over his shoulders, the young, violet eyed duelist took off into a sprint across the street, dodging the morning traffic and rushing to eat his sandwich as he did.

Yami appeared next to him, his gaze reflecting slight concern. "Yugi? What's the rush?"

Yugi ran faster, talking and chewing at the same time. "Tea and I have a big project due today, we're presenting first...and I'm running late." Swallowing he smiled at the spirit form of his best friend. "People say that Senior year is supposed to be the best year of high school, but between saving the world and the Grand Championship in the fall, classes, projects, and swarms of duelists chasing me for the chance to take the God cards...well it's been crazy to say the least."

"You're Spring break is coming up in a few weeks though, isn't it?" Yami questioned, chuckling a bit

Yugi nodded. "Yeah, but that's when we're all going to Egypt remember. We're going to unlock the secrets of your past."

"Yes, I remember...I'm actually a little anxious about it."

"Anxious? Why..."

"Yugi!"

The young King of Games connection with the Pharaoh fizzled out at the sound of his friend's voices. Staring ahead, Yugi noted Tea Gardner standing a few feet away with Joey Wheeler and Tristan Taylor standing on either side of her, waving at him with big goofy grins on their faces.

Yugi's smile widened as he approached his friends. "There's no need to worry about what will happen Pharaoh. With the support of our friends behind us, there's no way to lose."

Yami didn't get a chance as Tea smacked Yugi over the side of his head without warning. "Hey! Where have you been? It's not like you to be late like this and on today of all days." She clenched her fists by her sides as she stared down at him, an unusual deadly glint to her sapphire gaze. "If we don't get an A on this project so help me I'll hurt you..."

The violet eyes of the pharaoh widened considerably. "Yugi..."

"Tea has a tendency to become a demented psychopath during group projects," Yugi mentally explained, rubbing the back of his head as a slight blush of embarrassment rose over his face. Joey and Tristan laughed nervously at the sight, grateful that neither one of them had been paired off with the crazy lady.

Of course, when it comes to crazy ladies, Tea has nothing on the woman slowly approaching the King of Games from behind.

Rangiku's eyes reflected tense concentration as she came near. "I sense great spiritual pressure here, but from where? There isn't any sign of Hollows and I'm pretty sure the pressure I sensed was slightly stronger." Her gaze narrowed on Yugi standing directly in front of her. "Could it have possibly..."

The thought trailed off as the tall blonde in the group, a nosebleed nearly at full swing thanks to the cleavage Rangiku was sporting, noted her presence. "Hi there lady, is there something we can help you with."

There was a dark blush on Tristan's face as his eyes darted straight toward her chest. "Anything at all?"

Tea decided now was as good a time as ever to dish out her normal verbal beating to the two of them. Maybe add a couple of good bashes to the head. She was already frustrated as it was.

While that was going on, Yugi stared up at the woman, trying his best to keep his gaze on the woman's face and not on, well you know.

"Um hi, there," he managed, fighting a blush.

Rangiku smirked slightly. "I thought the pressure I felt came from this kid but...there's just no way...not with those big panda eyes."

"Ma'am?"

Rangiku shook her head slightly before patting the top of Yugi's head. Glancing up at Tea, practically strangling Joey while Tristan's mind traveled elsewhere, she called out rather boldly, "You two have a cute son here!"

Joey stared at Rangiku liked she'd lost all sanity. "SAY WHAT!"

Tea pushed the blonde away from her, a glare fixed on the newcomer. "Can't you see that we're in school uniforms? We're students not parents!" She scoffed indignantly as she glanced at Joey's shocked position on the pavement. "Like I'd ever think of having a kid with him. Please! The thought makes me shudder in revulsion."

Joey was still weighing the idea in his mind. "That's..." he paused a blush rising on his face before he shook his head again. "That's just plain wrong!"

Tristan blinked back into consciousness then. "Huh? What'd I miss?"

Yugi couldn't form words with his mouth yet, but inside his mind...

Let's just say Yami was cowering in fear in response to the images of Yugi using an AK-47 to shoot the woman over and over while he cackled in a way that would leave Marik's evil side with nightmares for years to come.

This was going to be worse than the incident when someone called Yugi whack.

Rangiku, in a state of bewilderment, pointed down at Yugi again. "Then whose kid is this?"

Yugi bared his teeth in uncharacteristic frustration. A fuse short-circuited, Yugi's sanity inadvertently thrown to the wind in the process.

"I'm sixteen for crying out loud!" Yugi screamed, his body surrounded by an aura of fire that came out of nowhere. His purple eyes turned red with rage and his hair became like a star-shaped lightning bolt. "I just haven't hit my growth spurt yet!"

Tristan took a small step forward. "Well actually Yugi, you did grow a foot or two since the start of this series."

A guttural growl escaped from Yugi's throat as he turned his fiery gaze toward his friend. "Don't you say anything else, breaking the bloody fourth wall and all that. Just shut up!"

Tristan slapped his hands over his mouth, tears threatening to spill from his hazel eyes.

"And you," he continued, pointing back at her. "At least I'm not an old harlot, showing off every bit of skin and causing trouble! Just...go away!"

Rangiku felt a surge of anger at that moment, but she didn't make a move, only observed Yugi's crazy temper tantrum. He certainly acted like a child as far as she was concerned, almost like Toshiro when he was upset.

"Well there's one way to settle that."

"OH!" she gushed loudly, enfolding her arms around Yugi's head before he could blink. In the next second she pulled his head right towards her chest, instantaneously dousing the fires of his blind rage. Instead his face flushed a magenta red, his heart started to pound, and his breathing stopped.

Of course the latter was due to the fact that his face was pressed against her cleavage.

"You're just so adorable my little darling," Rangiku stated, placing emphasis on the L word just to make his blush darken. In the next second she was giggling, holding him just a little tighter. "With that tri-colored, star-shaped hair, and those big round violet baby panda eyes...oh you're going to be so handsome when you finally grow up."

The aura of fire was surrounding Tea now.

Yugi's face began to turn blue. "Ple..ase...let go ma'am..."

"Rangiku," she cut in, smiling broadly as she tightened her grip once again. "The young and beautiful Rangiku Matsumoto."

Joey sighed, having finally recovered from Rangiku's earlier statements. "Well, that explains it. This woman is a foreigner."

"Foreigner or not she better let go of my Yugi," Tea muttered, cupping her hand into a tight fist. In the next second she was dialing for the police on her cell phone. "She's going to jail for this. That I assure you!"

Yami's spirit form appeared suddenly, drawing Rangiku's attention away from the boy she held in her arms at the moment, but she pretended not to notice as the spirit began to speak.

"Yugi, do you need me to take over?" he asked.

"No...her boobs are a bottomless pit of death!" Yugi mentally screamed, his panda eyes wide from the "horror" of it all. "Run away! Run far, far away!"

Yami sighed in disappointment. "You're enjoying this aren't you?"

"You bet I am!"

Rangiku smirked, tightening her grip again as she winked at the pharaoh's spirit form. "Bet you wish you were him, don't you?"

Yami's jaw dropped.

"Thought so..." she trailed off, finally letting Yugi go from her grasp. The boy fell backward on the pavement, the impact nearly knocking him out in the process.

"Other than a spirit inside that trinket around his neck," Rangiku thought, her smirk widening slightly, "there doesn't seem to be any other spirit presence in this city. Hmm, that means I can take the whole day off and get some major shopping done." With a wave she turned away from the group, her pace slow and deliberate as she walked in the opposite direction of the school a block or so away. "Still, this was a fun detour. I'll have to come back and squeeze that little plush toy again. He really is adorable, even cuter than the captain, and what's better is that he'll let me squeeze him all I want to. Yugi, was it? That's what that spirit called him. Hmmm, he was pretty adorable too..."

While Rangiku's inner mantra of coming back to visit Yugi continued, the person in question lifted his gaze barely, his vision failing him as he began to slip out of consciousness in Tea's arms.

The last thing he saw was Rangiku's hips swaying back and forth as she disappeared down the street.

He passed out with a happy blush on his face, muttering, "Best day ever..."

From then on, his dreams were filled with visions of the young and beautiful, Rangiku Matsumoto.

A/N: Awwww! That was fun to write. Big thanks again to my new friend Pyromaina101 for giving me this idea and for helping me write it in places. Hope you guys enjoyed the story, and as of now this is going to stay a one-shot, but who knows. Maybe later I'll turn it into a drabble series. In any case, thanks for reading everyone. If you like it, review it. Have a great day!