A/N: Hello, everyone. I wrote this fic a while ago, and for one thing then another, I didn't have the chance to post it until now. Next part will be up once my beta has it, but hopefully It'll be next week, also on Thursday.
This fanfic was wrote for and is dedicated to MistyMountainHop, who I love and admire. I hope you like it.
PS: Just realized the edition fucked up a few things in the document, it's corrected know. I'm sorry.
Magic
Part I
Jackie's small fingers tugged at Hyde's tie as he followed her down the basement's stairs after walking hand in hand to them, quickly disappearing out of everyone's sight.
Her giggles were enough for his shoulders to start losing the tension they had been carrying for the whole damn week and his lips welcomed the warm embrace of hers. He didn't register when they had reached his room, didn't care how fast they got out of their clothes and on his cot.
Even if she hadn't been listening to a single word he had said before, the physical comfort she was bringing him radiated by love, was enough. Hyde could feel her mouth and hands dusting away the fear installed deep in his heart, and it set his mind free for the time being.
As they touched each other, he stopped thinking about work, sudden new-found family, responsibility and the damn irony of his entire freakin' life. And when he entered her, Jackie was all inside and out, around, over and under him.
His chick had worked magic on him tonight.
Just half an hour ago, he had been the most tired he has ever felt, but the second her lips moved in that slow and soft motion of hers to tell him she wanted him, all of it was gone and his desire for her had worked them out nicely to the point when he couldn't stop smiling.
Jackie was panting beside him, sweating even if she would never admit it, and Hyde looked at her. Her perfect hair was also a mess, but the width of her smile took his attention immediately and he had to roll over, kiss her and breathe her in again.
"You know, people are going to notice we aren't up there..." He said, carefully lying over her without letting his whole weight crush her. "Not that I care, but... I thought you liked that stuff."
"Oh, I do!" Her hands went to his cheeks, and she caressed his face softly. Hyde closed his eyes, knowing he was smiling as she kept loving him tender. "But I like it more here. Don't you?"
"Way better than anywhere else."
Lately, a lot of things he did felt mandatory. But kissing her was always different, it never felt forced, and there was something new in it every time. To be with her was everything but routine and Hyde was sure, as long as they could maintain it this way, everything else would be fine for him.
But she was looking at him worried when they pulled away.
There was still that blush and shine from the bliss they reached together, but there was a small frown instead of her smile and Jackie bit her bottom lip, following the movements of her fingers as she caressed an invisible path from his eyebrow, down his nose, his lips, and to the dimple of his chin.
"You don't like working there with your father, don't you?" She murmured. If they hadn't been so close, maybe he wouldn't had heard her.
Her arms rounded his neck before he could answer and soon her hands were touching his back, the hard of his shoulders and hell, she waslistening to him earlier. Hyde had honestly thought she had ignored his whiny ass and quickly changed the topic to end up here.
But she had listened, man. Even now, Jackie kept surprising him with every small detail. She was so much more than she let out.
"God, you are tense!"
Yet, having her worried wasn't his intention at all. He didn't like the frown on her face or the tone she was using to talk right now. So, he kissed her again, trying to assure her he was fine.
"Steven," she sighed and smiled at him, "come on, turn around."
"Uh?"
"Trust me, baby." She smiled again and moved herself to make him do the same. "Turn around, please..."
He did as she asked, slowly turning on his back and she pushed him backwards, to her body, until he understood Jackie wanted him to lay down on her chest.
Once there, her arms crossed over his chest, rounding his neck and embracing him in her perfume, perfectly combined with his own scent and the smell of sex. Just like that, he started to feel softer, especially when her lips pushed against his sideburns and started to kiss his face tenderly.
"You know why I want you to keep that job?" She murmured near his ear, as if someone else could hear her.
Hyde sighed. "You want me to buy you nice shit."
"Steven." Her voice sounded firm, not quit angered or offended, just firm and serious. Like when Mrs. Forman only had to say his name and he will spill the truth.
"I don't know..."
Lately, that was his answer for everything.
He wondered if she ever was going to ask him what was up with that, if it bothered her. By the way her hands caressed down his chest, she wasn't mad at him for his answer, but she wasn't happy either. Jackie seemed to want him to relax, maybe thinking that this way he could have clearer thoughts.
"This is your family, Steven." She said, his body started to tense again, but her fingernails gently marked pink his pecs and oh, that felt nice. "You were given a second chance to have one of your biological parents with you." He opened his mouth to protest, but her arms moved, hugging him closer to her. "I know you don't want to talk about it, I won't make you do it... Today." She smiled against the skin of his face. "But listen to me, please."
"I'm always listening to you..."
She smiled again, kissing his temple. Hyde closed his eyes, sighing as a way to accept his fate. Jackie's fingers kept massaging his pecs and moved to his biceps, slowly stopping at his shoulders where she started to massage again.
"I want you to have this chance..." She murmured. "Not only at having a steady job, but having—a place, you know what I mean? Somewhere... to be."
'To belong', she meant. Jackie always made a big deal of that. He figured a long time ago, it all came down to her parents and their lack of real attention, or real love, towards her. She felt like a stranger even in her own house, a feeling he shared with her even before they knew the other existed.
"I'm fine right here." He answered after a silence that could had felt awkward if it wasn't for how warm she was. His nakedness didn't felt strange, in any way. "I've been fine without them, Jackie..." He sighed. "I don't know what you're talking about."
"We all need a place, Steven."
"Yeah, mine is right here."
He could have added 'lazy on this shitty cot' or even, 'with the Formans' but lying to her at this point to protect himself was starting to feel too unfair. She had put through a lot with him and has never left him behind. Jackie stood with him in good, sick, too damn odd and too damn scary, and yes, at the end of the office day, there was no other person he wanted to see and be with more than her.
Like other times, she was probably going to use this against him at some point. But right now, her grip became softer, as if his words had left her numb and Hyde opened his eyes, finding her staring at some lost point in front of them.
When she finally moved, he swallowed the ball of nervousness that made his stomach drop, and everything went back to normal when her lips caressed his. They kissed deeply and warm; all she was, reflected in it.
He happily welcomed it, hoping that this super power of hers – making him feel – would never burn out.
~0~
Steven was yawning too much, but Jackie knew he wasn't losing sleep at the moment.
Lately, they've been spending most nights of the week together and her mother seemed to not even notice her absence or the plus one at the house the few times she had been out of her room, searching for more booze.
He didn't look at her mother like their friends did, even when he pretended to. It costed her an entire week worth of crying into her pillow to see it and she had hated herself a little for that.
Why wasn't she able to see through Steven anymore? Or was she looking into it too much to the point his little things became invisible to her? She was starting to sound like her mother, had she started to act like her, too?
He yawned for the eight time at her side, barely giving any attention to the woman talking in the front.
"Are you really tired or just pretending to be?" She asked. It sounded harsh and bitter, and her hand slapped her own mouth almost immediately.
Steven had noticed, of course. But said nothing, only arched an eyebrow. "What's into you?"
Tired, she sighed and closed her eyes, putting her hand down. "I asked you something first."
"Not tired, just falling asleep." He leaned towards her and she waited for the kiss that never came. "Someone tricked me into coming with her to this, and I'm bored."
Jackie arched an eyebrow herself and looked at him, he was smiling already and that calmed her down a little.
"I didn't trick you into coming, you were orgasmed out of your mind and promised to do as I wanted. I just wanted to not come alone to this again…"
The last part had sounded ridiculous, even for her.
It was nothing, just some Christmas event to make people believe they were doing something good for the holidays. Steven always expressed disdain for these things, yet supported her when she wanted to do what she used to when she had been growing up.
Jack and Pam Burkhart had taught her that doing good by donating money and things others don't have was the right and expected thing to do by their social standards and she loved doing so as a kid. But then, she had met Donna and Mrs. Forman, and she had fallen in love with Steven's good heart and intelligent mind.
She had learned why these things were truly important and that the warm feeling in her belly wasn't selfishness but satisfaction. Maybe the toys will make someone happy, maybe she would be part of it.
"What's up with you, grasshopper?" His hand reached hers and he played with her fingers.
In what moment had she lowered her eyes to their hands between their seats? She was acting odd, it was only natural for him to notice something was wrong and she remembered Mrs. Forman advice from this morning, "Well… talk to him, darling".
"Steven," she started, not sure of how to approach what she truly wanted to ask. But he was putting all his attention to her and a round of applauses exploded around them. They applauded, too, but were looking at each other. "Would you come with me to this next year?"
"That's a long time, Jackie." He smiled, interlacing their fingers as he thought of it. "What's wrong? You are not enjoying this but you are asking to come next year, what is it?"
"Steven…" She sighed. "I—I need to know something, but I'm not sure if I should… ask."
"Shoot, it can't get worse than this."
This, she hoped, meaning the event and not being with her. Jackie swallowed and nodded before finding the will power to speak her mind.
"I need to know if next year we are going to be together."
"What?"
He had gone Zen and her heart panicked a little with it; would he always go to his safe place every time she wanted to know something? Was this how things would always be between them from now on? It couldn't be.
"Steven, do you think we are going to be together next year?"
"Well…" He swallowed, his hand became sweaty in hers but she didn't want to let him go. "Yeah. I guess."
"You guess?" She tilted her head and he put his free hand over theirs. "What about the next, next year? Are we going to be together?"
"Jackie, what do you want?" He murmured. "Just say it."
In the front, the woman had thanked everyone for the Christmas Toy Drive and had said her apologies for the lack of wrapping for those toys. She had catched Steven and their friends with them, all open and used in the basement.
Her anger at the moment had been lessened by the fact that he was ready to go with her and had stood up the moment he saw her. He put the boys to work into putting everything back in boxes and Eric, Fez and Michael had gotten the toys back.
But now he was here, bored out of his mind, after having explained to her in El Camino that he just wanted to have some silly fun from time to time, before he settles down and life went to crap.
"Okay…" She sighed. "Do you think we have a future together?"
Jackie needed to know. Because her first instinct had been to jump into the conclusion that her Steven thought life with her, once they settle down, was going to go to crap. And if he thought that, if he was really this unhappy and bored, then—then…
He chuckled. "Why would you ask that?" Even smiling, his voice sounded empty, he was closing himself again and Jackie tugged at the sleeve of his shirt. "I—"
"Would you th—"
"Oh, Jackie!" Mrs. Forman called her, she looked up at her. "Come here, there's someone I want you to meet!" There were a few older women with her and Jackie looked back at Steven, he seemed worried and the hint of emotion in his face made her feel better. "You too, Donna, darling."
When she looked at her friend, Jackie's face felt warm. She was looking at her with a big question in her face and Jackie realized Donna had heard them. Steven hadn't let go of her hand and she smiled at him, moving to stand up with Donna and Mrs. Forman, as he let her go almost reluctant.
"Steven?"
"I'll think about it." He answered.
Did he seriously had to think it? Did he? His face looked as confused as she felt, Jackie only nodded.
She wondered if he felt as hurt as she did.
~0~
"But you couldn't answer me right away, Steven. How could you not know right in the moment that you want to be with me for the long term?"
Her eyes were the saddest poem he had ever felt and it dried his mouth and closed his throat, keeping him from answering her too strong doubts.
"If you can't tell me you love me, at least I was hoping you would tell me you think we'll be together next year. But not even next year?"
Jackie kept talking. He swallowed and it burned down his stomach, stronger than any alcohol. Fear was making him mad, if Hyde was trembling by now, it was probably the purple marks he was causing to his arms at the moment as he crossed them over his chest.
"Jackie—"
"No, listen to me—"
"Jackie!" She shut her mouth and his hand went right into his sides, unable to move forward or backwards. Hyde was standing right in front of her with the basement empty for the exception of their discussion. "Listen to yourself first. Where is all this coming from? What did I do now?"
She swallowed visibly, moving her eyes from his face to the rest of his body, and then back at his face. Like she was thinking, debating to tell him whatever was on her mind or not. And she couldn't, she closed her eyes and let go a soft sound of defeat.
"I just want to know if we are ever going to get married—"
"Are we back on this again?" His voice sounded too harsh even for him, he shut his mouth and squeezed his eyes shut, walking away from her as she stood, balancing her body in the same place. "Why can't you just be happy with what we've got?"
"Because I'm not, Steven! Look, I need to know that we have a future together…"
Jackie's voice was a small echo at the back of all the white noise Hyde was listening to. She had answered right away, no doubts, what he feared the most: she wasn't happy, her love for him wasn't enough anymore and, like he always knew it would happen, she needed more.
She didn't even hesitate to say it. For how long had she been feeling like this? How come he didn't notice before?
"… ybe, someday, we'll get married?"
He blinked before looking up at her, "I don't know", he said with the strangest voice, for he had fire in his throat and the shadows inside his chest were menacing with coming out, right in front of her.
"That's all you ever say!" It was, he stood there without doing a thing. She kept talking, and he only noticed the movement of her lips, his brain wasn't getting any of her words, let alone their meaning. "Please, Steven, please. Just say anything besides 'I don't know', anything else!"
Because she wasn't happy, she wasn't happy, she wasn't happy.
She wasn't happy.
"I don't know."
Maybe he never knew what she needed to be happy, maybe he never made her happy and she just got tired of waiting. But why had he been happy all this while? Wasn't it cruel that he was the happiest he's ever been while she wasn't? Why did she never tell him otherwise until now?
"Okay." She sighed. "Well, then I can't be with you anymore."
Wasn't this crap of being together a balance of likings and goals? She kept shoving into his face her dreams of being a perfect wife with perfect kids and a perfect husband. He would never be such things, he would never be happy like that.
This was the girl who a week and a half ago made him feel like she had magic kisses and magic fingers, making him giving him a sleep he couldn't dream of for weeks until she slept by his side And now she was taking away all of it away, she was using their feelings for each other to make him cave and fit into her shallow plans.
"Jackie, don't threaten me, okay? It's not gonna work."
She stood there, her eyes opened wide and cold and her arms fell at her sides. Defeated. So that was it, she was truly using i—
"That's what you think of me?" She bit her lip and licked at it while nodding. "That explains everything. You really think I just wait for you to obey me and that I'm out there ready to manipulate you? You still think that?" He opened his mouth, he didn't have anything to say, but she needed to shut up because shit, shit, shit. "I'm not threatening you, Steven." Jackie sighed again. "I can't waste any more of my time on you if it's not gonna happen for us."
There was a pause then. The tone of her voice wasn't the right amount of conceited to be manipulative, it wasn't the right amount of secure to be a trap. She was breaking up with him and it was hurting her all the same. And right now, she waited, eyes open and honest, transparent in a way that was so damn scary.
Why did she trust him so much? He couldn't even move, he didn't have anything to say. He fucked up, hadn't he? It wasn't enough with not having it in him to give her what she wanted, he had also insulted her by taking her for granted like everyone else did in her life and he had misjudged like all those people.
"Okay…" Tears rolled down her face, she cleaned them with her sweater sleeve and swallowed before talking to him again. "Well, at least now I know."
She just… walked away with that, closing the basement's door behind her with almost no sound. Like if she wasn't mad at him for this number, or as if she didn't have the strength to be anyway. And Hyde sat down, elbow on his knee, hurting like fucking hell and its next of a kind.
His mouth was dry, his throat still full of his guts and every word he couldn't get out. His brain wasn't sure if he was angry or sad, but his back was in pain and his nostrils burn as if sick. To close his eyes was a bad idea, he recognized, as the weight of these past three days fell on his shoulders and both his hands covered his face.
"Fuck."
It didn't even sound as aggravated as the entire situation felt, as he felt, but it was all he could say. And then, came the numbness.
~0~
When Eric hadn't shown up to his wedding, Jackie had been by Donna's side since the beginning and almost dropped her from her window when she forgave Eric so easily.
She knew it was a matter of time before that bomb exploded, but right now, she only had mind for two things: the way her eyes had stopped watering but she was still sobbing, and how Donna's fingers felt in her hair.
This breakup was like no other, it had costed Donna a little to realize this but when she did, she stood by her side the same way Jackie had when she most needed her, and it made her feel a tiny bit better.
She and Steven hadn't talked to each other at all until Donna got them all tickets to the Packers game. At first, she had thought of not going and let his friends have fun but when Steven showed that cocky attitude about being fine without her, she needed to prove herself what she already knew wasn't the case: she wasn't fine at all.
Donna had appeared to her rescue and Jackie wondered for a couple of seconds how she had found her, how she had known. But it didn't matter. She had ruined her friend's already ugly shirt and tacky coat, and her makeup and hair, the ones she had put so much effort in for the day, were also a mess by now.
"Things can't keep this way, Jackie." Donna said. "You both are my friends, but this is killing you." She signaled inside the stadium, to where their seats would be. "I'm gonna go there and smack his head against the floor, maybe that way his brain would make some sense."
Jackie laughed a little at that, slowly getting away from her friend and Donna's fingers moved to the back of her neck. It felt almost motherly, if this is how this kind of care feels like, the way her hands grabbed her gently and how she had let her cry over her chest.
The boys would had seen and say whatever they wanted, but it had felt good and Jackie was grateful for her friend.
She also knew she won't do such thing to Steven. He was her oldest and dearest friend, after Eric, and Jackie would never want them to get away from each other just because of her. Losing a friend was like losing a part of you, and Jackie, even after this pain, didn't want that for Steven when he had lost so much before, when he hadn't had so much since he was a kid.
"I mean it." Donna insisted and Jackie nodded. "This can't keep going this way. You two have to talk and—"
"And what?" She sighed. "Donna, the last time we tried to talk, he kept saying 'I don't know, I don't know'. He can't say anything else…" She cleaned the remain of salt off her face with the sleeve of her jacket and Donna looked down at her, waiting. "Believe me when I say that I have tried everything, but he just doesn't know. And I do believe him when he says that. What else could it be?"
"I don't know—" Donna sighed, shook her head and tried to take away those words from her mouth. "What I mean is, maybe he's scared. Jackie, you're someone who expects too much from people. And Hyde is someone who… well, he does the bare minimum, always. It's safer that way for him."
"And he's wrong!"
Donna arched an eyebrow, Jackie shook her hand dismissively in front of her face and returned her back to the wall like before Donna appeared. Her friend moved, walked to her side and leaned her own back to the wall, hands inside her own pockets, thinking out loud about the situation.
"This sucks." She murmured. "Eric's being an idiot who doesn't care about his future, or our future, and you two broke up. Kelso is being weirder than usual…"
"You noticed too?"
"Yeah." She swallowed and then continued. "He misses Brooke, I think. It must be hard for him. It's the first time he tries to truly commit to someone and they get separated."
"The best love stories start that way." She answered. "I told him, if he wants Brooke, maybe he should think of a way they could make it work."
Donna chuckled at that. "Kelso? Man, he barely works for himself." She sighed.
A pregnant silence overcame them and Jackie felt Donna's insecurity and sadness touching her shoulders. She looked at her side, to her friend, and saw her with her eyes in the ground.
She wasn't someone who did that, who looked down and put down her head. Donna always walked, talked and acted full of security and sometimes, full of herself, and Jackie liked that about her a lot. Maybe that was why they were friends, because they shared that ability.
But tonight, both had their heads down and both had a ghost floating over their heads as if something was to come, something none of them were ready to face and that was also devouring the boys they shared their every day with.
"We are growing up, after all." Donna said.
Ever since Jackie got her first Bride Barbie, she had wanted to grow up. So, she took her mother's shoes and purses, put make up on and prepared the most fancy and mature tea parties in her garden with her dolls and stuffed animals, even invited other girls with their dolls for tea.
Pam Burkhart had been proud and happy to see her grow up into a materialistic cannibal, always hungry for talking other people down and out of her way, prepared to attack and win without thinking on consequences and other people's heart.
It sickened her to think about, it also sickened her that she was no longer like that because Steven James Hyde had happened to her, and he was a disease that will never go away.
"Isn't it ironic how life is taking away what we love and want the most from us and giving it to the morons that break our hearts on a daily basis?"
Donna's breath got caught on her throat and Jackie felt the way her friend was making holes in her head with her eyes. "What do you mean?"
"Donna, wasn't your biggest dream to get a scholarship and travel the world, learning and all that jazz?" Jackie looked at her, swallowing, knowing this was going to hurt Donna as much as it was hurting Jackie. "And now, Eric is doing nothing and you are trapped here on a job that uses you as a sex totem."
"Oh…"
"And for me—" She swallowed again. "Steven's father turned out to be rich, he gave him stability and a whole store of his own. His economic future is safe. Me?" She laughed, all the poison in her voice was melting her insides. "I haven't had a new piece of clothing for over a year."
"What?" Donna frowned. "You? No, way! You live at the mall with your mom!"
"Yeah, well. Her boyfriends give her money for her, she only shares when it comes to food. Anything else I need…" She couldn't reveal the next piece of information; betraying Steven's trust wasn't on her plans after all. "Well, I have to take care of it myself."
"Damn…"
"And then, there's Michael, who was never capable of monogamy with me, but now is suffering because he can't be with one single girl while he tries to ignore it by loyally dating another girl." She looked at the blond and Donna nodded at her, understanding Jackie's words. "Is God sexist?"
Donna smiled, Jackie followed her lead and smiled at her own joke. "I always thought God was a woman, but now that I think about it, maybe not."
Jackie sighed, taking Donna's hand when she offered, and walking back to the game. Seeing Steven was going to be as hard, but at least she had Donna.
"Yeah." Jackie said. "Maybe not."
~0~
The smell of his room was nauseating.
It had been deprived from all things Jackie shortly after their break up, Donna and Fez being the ones in charge to march out the room with Jackie's crap and a solemn expression that declared a sympathy he didn't want.
Now the incense could do so much, it covered the smell of pot perfectly when needed, but the rest of the day, the absence of a window only allowed the humid to embrace the whole place and make it smelly, like a pre-pube's room. Mrs. Forman was not going to be happy once she noticed after taking the used sheets from his cot.
It also felt somehow empty, much colder than he remembered and how the hell had Hyde become such a softie?
He sat down on his cot and looked at the ground, trying to shut his mind for a few seconds so he could better think the whole situation over.
"Hey, man."
Kelso's voice sounded like an echo to him, the hollow of his room more evident with his tall body making a twilight in front of him. Hyde blinked a couple of times, wondering what was he doing here and what was that stupid expression on his face.
"What's up?"
"Oh, nothing, just…" He moved the armchair with his foot, sitting in front of him with a strange smile. "Donna told me you were gonna talk to Jackie." He said. "How did that go? Are you two together again?"
Hyde only had to arch an eyebrow for the doofus to understand, even though he suspected Kelso already knew the answer. What else could explain Hyde's presence in his room? Had he and Jackie been back together, he wouldn't be here alone and Kelso wouldn't had found the door open in the first place.
"Did she…?" Kelso moved his hands, like indicating a space between them. "Did she reject you or som—?"
"I didn't say anything." He confessed, too tired to find an excuse. "She's better off without me."
"Yeah, I guess…" Kelso answered, visibly swallowing and scratching the back of his head. "Wait, no. That's not right. What makes you think she's better off without you?"
"Look, she said it herself. She's… finally there, you know? She finally found something she loves and that she can do on her own. I'm not gonna be the one to intervene between that and her."
"What the hell are you talking about?"
"Alright, what would you understand about that?" He murmured, the silence that followed his words made him look up at Kelso.
But his friend was looking aside with arms crossed over his chest, lost in his own mind, like thinking about Hyde's words and what he implied.
Kelso had helped Jackie on her show today.
He had stood in front of the camera and made her variety program diverse and funny to whatever audience she may had gotten tonight. Even after all he had done to her, he was able to still stand at her side and he—maybe Hyde should had supported her properly since the beginning.
"You know, Hyde…" Kelso said, he wasn't looking at him at all but his voice sounded too soft, like trying to take tears away from it. "There's nothing here in Point Place."
"Uh?"
"Well, if you compare it to other places…" He looked up, but still didn't look at his face. "There is nothing good here, just—me, I guess."
"What's the deal, Kelso?"
"Brooke." His fingers scratched the old chair, he was talking too low and too soft. "She wasn't sure of leaving at first, but then I—told her it was for the best." Kelso finally looked at him. "I didn't see it at first, sometimes I still don't. But, you know, Betsy will have a better school and Brooke a better job, a better house and…"
As slow as his friend's brain, the idea behind the conversation hit him. Hyde's back straightened, looking at Kelso almost with too opened eyes, surprised. Had his friend gotten to that point? To finally understand that his own good is not always everyone else's good?
"But I'm not there." He continued. "And if I asked her to stay here with me, Betsy wouldn't have all the nice stuff she has over there, you know? That's what Tom said…"
One of his brother, the older one? "Which one is Tom?"
"The married one, Hyde!" He answered. "We went to his wedding! We stole a bottle of that disgusting vodka thing and my dad found us!"
Ah, yes. They had been thirteen and stupid, eager for growing up enough to buy their own booze, be like everyone else. Just as crazy and just as wild, and always getting caught in the act. It had been a good day and Hyde smiled, Kelso returned the smile and laughed with the memory.
Later that day, Casey had given them beer and that had been the only day Hyde has ever seen Kelso happy around that brother in particular. His friend's relationship with his siblings was all kinds of messed up, and it brightened his mind to finally notice that maybe that was the first strike against Kelso, what started the path to become the whiny ass he was.
"Anyway…" Kelso sighed. "Tom said I should let Brooke and Betsy go, because it was for their own good. I told that to her, and you know what she answered me?" Hyde swallowed. Whatever Brooke had told Kelso, it had affected him enough to still remember it and to think it was worth recalling for Hyde's own situation. "She said that was her decision to make."
"What?" He found himself sounding offended. His hands were fists over the covers of his cot, and the idea of Jackie saying this to him for his own decision made him want to puke. "What are you talking about? Kelso, be clear. It's late and I'm tired, and you are being an idiot. Just end it."
"She said she's the only one who can decide what's best for her—"
"But she left!"
"Well, yeah, because it was the best. But she got mad at me, anyway! God, why don't you ever let anyone talk before you get your own conclusions?"
Vile rose up his throat, he had been told that before. By his own goddamn mother, by Forman, by Donna, by Jackie and now, freakin' Kelso. He shut his trap and let Kelso finish whatever he was trying to get out his system.
"It was the best for her and Betsy in the end, but she got mad at me because I decided by myself that it was best for us." He signaled himself with both hands pointing at his chest. "Lily—That's Tom's wife. Lily said she was right. I shouldn't had decided for our relationship all by myself. And you know what?" He arched an eyebrow, hoping whatever was coming would make sense. "It sucks! I did this all the time with Jackie and she always forgave me! But now, Brooke is going out with some doctor and my daughter is gonna call him daddy before she calls me!"
Oh. Hyde blinked a couple of times, licked his lips before talking but Kelso's arms opened and his friend looked directly at him—"Hyde! Don't make decisions for Jackie! Did she tell you she doesn't wanna get back together?"
"N—"
"Did she say she's ok without a guy right now?"
"She said she was going to do fine by her own."
"Well, she does!" He added, then signaled at him with one accusatory finger. "But that's not gonna change because she's getting it!"
None of this could be getting out of Kelso's mouth alone. Someone must had put the words to his brain and on his tongue, it was impossible so many changes would had occurred to him in such a short time. Why wouldn't Angie correct him about how much of an idiot Kelso was if he was this clever now?
"Kelso, man—"
"I miss Brooke, okay? And I miss the way she made me feel about myself. But I lose her because I made a stupid mistake, I listened to the wrong person instead of listening to her." He said, not giving him a chance to complain or stop him. His eyes searched for something in the room and Kelso's body suddenly froze. "And I'm gonna break up with your sister, that's why I came here."
"Wait, WHAT?"
And then, comes the nonsense. This was the Kelso he knew, searching for an easy way to get himself out of any problems. He was going to ask him to dismiss Angie for him, and his fist got ready to frog him as many times as necessary for the next few minutes of their conversation.
"The Captain at my division got me a relocation I can go to Chicago with the same shift," he started to number the benefits with his fingers. They were long and skinny, and holy shit, Kelso's body was out of proportion everywhere. How did all of it made sense? "The same charge, and one of the guys at the station in Chicago needs a roommate, so my Captain told him to wait for me to give them an answer—"
"You are going to Chicago?"
"I don't know!" He answered. "I—I have to talk to Angie first."
"You said you were gonna break up with her…"
"Yes!" He said, then blinked a couple of times. "No! I mean, if that's what she wants. And let's face it, it will be... I guess we are gonna break up."
The silence that followed gave Hyde time to process the information. It didn't explain why Kelso had tried to give him advice on relationships and why he was sharing with him these big news. Maybe he just needed to take it out of him, say it out loud to make a decision.
"Things are not gonna change with Brooke." Kelso said. "But I can be with Betsy, and… do something."
"What do you mean?"
"No one there knows I'm an idiot." He looked up again, his face seemed like a child's. The insecurity in his voice became apparent and Hyde noticed, for the first time, how complex his friend had become. "Plus, I nailed all the pretty girls here. I'm not getting in with uggos, Hyde."
"Kelso." He swallowed, crossing his arms over his chest. "You're an idiot."
Kelso smiled at him and nodded. "Yeah." He sighed then and shrugged. "I just wanted to know… if you are going to hate me in case Angie breaks up with me." He finally let out. "Because, sometimes, it feels as if we aren't friends anymore. And it's really sad because Jackie and I are better than we have ever been. We should be good, too."
They should.
His disdain for Kelso had come while noticing the disgusting ways he thought and treated everyone around him. Kelso never thought of the consequences of his bullshit, he constantly screwed him and their friends over and over again. And when he fell for Jackie? Boy, the way Kelso had treated her was the top reason on his list for wanting to punch his friend's face.
But Kelso had been one of his best friends, too. His partner in crime most times, always listening to his bad ideas and doing as he said, putting his ass at risk and hurting himself in the process while putting on an act or a well thought prank.
And now he had grown up. He was a cop and a father, and had a big-time opportunity to follow his family to the place that was most likely to become home for him.
"We ain't stopping being friends for that, shit happens all the time." He answered, because Kelso wasn't Bud. "Look, you gotta do what you think is best for you and your daughter. Angie will see that, she's pretty smart and mature." And he wasn't Edna, either. He wasn't abandoning his kid and leaving her to have only her mother. He wasn't leaving Brooke alone in it, too. "And if you two still want to be together, you'll find a way."
"Alright!" Kelso answered after a few seconds. The idiotic smile on his face looked genuine and tender, it made him smile a little. "Thank you, Hyde!"
He stood up, squeezing his shoulder before leaving his room. Hyde sighed after he heard Kelso's steps getting away from his room, until he ran back, looking at him front the door frame. Hyde blinked, waiting.
"You're in love with Jackie, man." He assured, Hyde opened his mouth to shush him but he continued talking. "And she's in love with you. You are smart, do the math!" Kelso swallowed and seemed to make himself smaller, maybe fearing something. "You can't decide for her. I did that a lot and look where that got me…"
In an instant, he saw himself in Jackie's Lincoln, smiling at her as he reminded her how much better she was without Kelso and how much better she could do. Even when he told her that, she made the decision herself, of not believing Kelso's crap at the moment and then, even after making the same mistake again, she found herself wanting someone else. Hyde.
In the end, it had become true, her doing better than Kelso.
She wanted him and a future with him, and that was what it was all about. Hyde's fingers were probably leaving red marks that will become purple on his skin now, but he didn't uncross his arms over his chest. He only nodded.
"Ok." Kelso said. "Don't marry the stripper, Hyde!"
He moved his head to one side and frowned. "What?"
"Oh, Fez didn't tell you?" He smiled. "He dreamt you married a stripper in Vegas and brought her here to rub it in Jackie's face that marriage means nothing." He smiled again. "She was really hot! Looked like Annette and Laurie at the same time and had these huge—"
"That's gross, Kelso! Get the hell out of here!"
"'Nite, 'nite!"
Was this what his friends thought of him? That he would hurt Jackie that much? That he was that kind of bastard?
Did Jackie think the same about him?
Second part: Everyone is leaving Point Place, included Jackie. Hyde needs to talk to her. Or something.