Because what does a stupid bitch do when she has too many Feelings and far too much time on her hands?

Write a truly stupid number of EliHec oneshots, that's what.

Anyway, I can't promise that I'll be able to update consistently once a day, but I will be doing all 28 prompts, hopefully by the end of February, unless something pops up to prevent me from doing so. Since it's gonna be a long challenge, though, the entries will probably all be fairly short.

Today's prompt is "First Crush", taken from an art challenge called "Febuqueery". No warnings apply. Not much actual EliHec in this one, but I'll try to make up for that tomorrow.

Day 1: First Crush

Ever since he'd become Marquess, it seemed like Uther was able to spend less and less time with his brother. Nowadays, he was usually busy, and Hector was usually either stuck with the tutors, training with his axe, or off on one of his spars with Eliwood.

So, when Oswin informed him that Hector had just returned from his latest such sparring session, Uther decided there couldn't be much harm in dropping by for a quick visit. Surely, Marquess Laus' pressing concerns about the quality of Lycian food could wait a few minutes more.

When he poked his head into Hector's quarters, though, he hadn't expected his energetic little brother to be sitting on the edge of his bed, head propped up on one hand, and staring off into the distance with an expression of intense concentration.

Uther raised an eyebrow. "Hector?"

With a surprised "Muh?", Hector lifted his cheek from his hand and turned towards the door. He had an odd, far-off look in his eyes, even now that he was no longer lost in thought. "Oh. Hey, Uther," he said after a moment, then immediately turned away and dropped his chin back onto his palm.

Bemused, Uther ducked through the doorway and, just because he could, plopped down on the mattress beside Hector, whose only response was a vaguely irritated grunt. "What are you up to?" Uther asked once it became clear that Hector was going to keep ignoring him.

Hector responded with a noncommittal hum. "Not much," he admitted, his eyes still fixed on some indistinct point in the distance. "Just... thinking, I guess."

"A truly rare occurrence," Uther immediately shot back.

That, at least, earned him a disgruntled glare, and Hector turned towards him again. "Hey! I think plenty!" he protested. "Get off my case! Jeez! First Eliwood, now you―!"

"Oh, so Eliwood pointed it out, too?" A small but genuine smile crossed Uther's face. "I hate to tell you, Hector, but if people are surprised to see you thinking, then it probably means you could stand to think more oft―"

He paused. Now that they were sitting closer, he could really get a good look at Hector's face. There were a couple new bruises and scrapes here and there―fairly standard injuries for a friendly sparring match―but, much more interestingly, even though the curtains were drawn and no candles lit, the tinge of pink on his cheeks was still very apparent.

"...You're blushing."

Immediately, Hector began to blush harder. "I am not!" he cried, physically scooting away from Uther as if that would mask the unmistakable flush on his face.

"You are," Uther said, suddenly filled with childish glee. Before Hector could intercept him, he quickly lunged forward and grabbed both of his cheeks, squishing them with an exaggerated cooing noise. "Aw, my little brother's embarrassed―"

With an affronted squawk, Hector shoved him away, and Uther generously allowed himself to be shoved. "I'm not embarrassed!"

"What do you call this, then?" Uther demanded, pointing a finger dramatically at Hector's ears, which were nearly crimson at this point. "Honestly, Hector―if the teasing bothers you so much, then―"

"I'm not blushing over that!" Hector interrupted, then immediately backpedaled when he realized what he'd said. "I―I mean, I'm not blushing at all―"

Too late; Uther had already latched on to the admission. "So what are you blushing over, then? Did Eliwood wipe the floor with you?" he guessed.

"No!"

"No? Huh. Did you trip over your own feet and lose the match?"

"No!"

"Really? Damn, I was sure I had it right that time―but it was something to do with Eliwood, wasn't it? I mean, it has to be," Uther reasoned. "What else could you be thinking about so intently―?"

He stopped dead in his tracks, his eyes widening. Perhaps Hector somehow sensed that he'd been caught, because his eyes widened, too, more out of terror than realization.

"Oh, sweet Elimine," Uther said. "You have a crush."

Hector let out a long, incomprehensible string of syllables. "Out!" was the only coherent word he seemed capable of producing, practically tackling Uther off of the bed and shoving him towards the door.

Uther, however, was not so easily deterred. "Who is it?" he demanded, his mind racing as Hector tried to push him through the doorway without much success. "Do I know them? How long have you known them? Is this a serious thing, or just an infatuation thing?"

"Oh my god, shut up!" Hector practically screamed. He finally managed to push Uther over the threshold, but Uther wedged his arm between the door and the doorframe before it could be slammed shut.

"How long have you liked them?" he continued, pushing against the door with all of his body weight as Hector tried to force it shut. "Do you know if they like you back? Are you going to confess?"

"Uther! Stop! Talking!" Hector grit out, clenching his teeth in exertion as he tried in vain to push his brother all the way out.

Unfortunately, his own physical prowess didn't matter much when Uther was older and quite a bit bigger than him. "No way!" Uther said, managing to get his leg through the door as well. "As your older brother, I'm contractually obliged to pester you with prying questions about your first crush!" He paused. "Wait. Is this your first crush?!"

With an undignified noise of frustration, Hector drew back and kicked Uther hard in the shin, forcing him to retreat just enough for the door to nearly close. Still, Uther refused to give in. "What's their hair color?" He, perhaps stupidly, pushed his face through the dwindling crack in the door. "Come on, what's the harm in telling me? Just tell me that and I'll leave you alone, I promise!" he blatantly lied. "Just tell me what color their hair is! Come on, Hector! What color is―?"

"Red!" Hector practically shrieked, his frustration finally reaching its peak. "His hair is red! Now leave me alone!"

As Hector's voice echoed throughout the hallway, both brothers suddenly fell still, stopping their struggle for control of the door. For a solid ten seconds, they just stared at each other with wide eyes, frozen in place. Hector's face turned an unhealthy color, somewhere between red and purple.

"Wait," Uther said belatedly, "his?"

"Um," was Hector's witty reply.

The gears in Uther's head were turning very slowly at the moment, but it still didn't take him very long to piece the puzzle together.

"Wait," he said, "ELIWOOD?!"

Hector screamed like a banshee and, with a sudden surge of adrenaline, slammed the door shut.

By the time Uther returned to his senses, he'd already been locked out. Still, he jiggled the doorknob uselessly in a vain attempt to get back in. "Hector, come on!" he called through the door. "Let me in!"

"Don't ever talk to or look at me ever again," Hector responded, voice muffled but clearly strained.

"Oh, don't be like that!" Giving up on the knob, Uther turned to press his ear against the mahogany, raising his voice to make sure Hector could hear him. "Don't be embarrassed! You two make a good pair!"

"Uther, oh my god, shut up!"

Despite himself, Uther laughed, his head falling back against the door. Despite his surprise, now that he thought about it, Hector having a crush on Eliwood... made a lot of sense. And they really were a good pair. Hopefully, this particular crush was requited―as Marquess of Ostia, he had a vested interest in keeping affairs with other territories civil, and, as Hector's older brother, he had the absolute right to do horrible things to anyone who broke his brother's heart.

...And, as Hector's only parental figure of sorts, he currently had one more crucial unfulfilled duty.

"Hector, let me in," he called, rapping on the door. "I swear to the Seven, I'm not going to tease you, but there's something I need to tell you. It's important."

A long moment passed, but, finally, Hector slowly cracked the door open, staring out at Uther with one wary eye. "...What?"

Uther met his gaze steadily, without faltering. "There are some things that Mother and Father never got a chance to tell you," he said very solemnly. "Things that the tutors won't teach you in classes."

He could practically smell the curiosity rolling off of Hector in waves. Cautiously, he opened the door a bit more, taking a step over the threshold. "Yeah?"

Placing both his hands heavily on Hector's shoulders, Uther looked him dead in the eye, making sure to impart the gravity of the situation through his expression alone. He paused for a moment to let the tension build.

"Hector," he said seriously, "when two consenting adults love each other very much―"

Uther went to court that evening with a black eye and a huge, self-satisfied grin on his face.